Riloth 19th the 8th

Just woke up. I counted my money, I have 5 gold coins, 322 silver, 112 copper 8 bits. That is enough to buy 41.662% of a potion. I don’t think that Levar will parcel it out like that. Maybe a down payment? No, he didn't seem too amenable to my begging when I showed up last night. We need to plan.

Ways to acquire funds:

Ask Trish Steal it Gamble

I think those are the only three ways to get twelve gold coins in short order. Unless Trish has been running hot, I don't think I will be able to get it all from her. If it comes to stealing, I'm sure I can figure it out through some trail, error, and resets, but that seems morally dubious at best.

The last option is gambling. Is exploiting a temporal anomaly for financial gain morally dubious? Probably, but it's not like I get to keep it so I am going to say it's fine. By that merit though, the stealing is probably okay too. Right?

I spoke to Trish, tracking her down at lunch. She was not willing to lend me any coin. I eventually got it out of her that she's down to a handful of silver, so even if she was willing, she was not able to bridge the massive deficit.

I know Daulf gives away his money as fast as he gets it so I won’t bother asking him, and I have no idea where Roland is.

After failing to mooch the coin, I decided to gamble for it. I don’t mean to brag, but I am very good at chips. If you don’t know, because why would you, you're a spellbook I'm pretending (hoping?) can understand me, chips is a game where you place five two-sided chips in a sequence under a cover, you then reveal them one at a time and the other players bet on the pattern. Different patterns let you have a different portion of the pot, and you split it with whoever guesses your pattern.

Normally, I clean house. Roland and Trish won’t often play with me for stakes, so I'm left to fleecing strangers we meet in inns. I say normally because this prison is anything but normal. I sat down at a chips table expecting to quickly double my coin, and I was cleaned out in only five rounds. I don’t know how. It was like I didn’t even know how to play anymore. I’ve heard people talk about the strategy of the game, but never really cared for it. I’ve always just been good at the game. It just came to me naturally; my intuition usually proving correct. Today I did about as good as I would have had I just guessed at each sequence. After losing my money I even stuck around to see if I could follow the game and figure out what I was doing wrong, but even with nothing on the line my guesses were way off.

Tomorrow I need to find a game of pure chance and record the results, then bet on those same results each morning. I wasn’t thinking clearly. Even had I won at chips, it would have been a chore to repeat every morning.

I’m out of money, so it looks like this misery will extend at least into tomorrow. I took a nap before writing this so it's pretty late. I only have one day left to recap so I might as well get that out of the way so I can focus on my new mission.

Riloth 19th the 1st

The first time I lived through this day I woke up at nine, but then fell back asleep for another hour. When I finally woke up for good, I felt wretched. I don't think I need to describe that to you again. I checked Trish's room first, but there was no answer. Going down to the ground floor I found Trish gaming on the floor, with a sizable amount of winnings.

"Good morning sunshine! You look," she paused, looking me up and down, "terrible."

I don't know how she does it, but she drank as much as I did and looked great. But looks can be deceiving when it comes to Trish. Contrary to what your eyes will tell you, Trish is a half-elf. When I met her that first day in the caravan she was very effectively disguised as a human girl of around my age. In reality, she is a half-elf of around fifty, though I haven’t asked. I estimated her age by some of the thing’s shes told me about her past. Asking her age would be... a bad idea.

Trish has an uncanny ability to disguise herself, through acting, posture, dress, and makeup. She is able to put on a persona that makes her unrecognizable. If I didn't know better, I would say it was magical. She uses the ability as if it is second nature, often changing personas in an instant as we interact with strangers. It seems that every time I see her on the floor gambling, she is under a different guise. Today she is in what I think of as her true self, the one she put on after... that night. But it very well might just be her default disguise.

Ignoring her assessment I said, “Trish, can you track down Daulf and Roland? I’d like to get moving today before noon, but I don’t think that’s going to happen.”

“Sure, I think I wore out my welcome at this table anyway, I was going to need to bum some coin from you to pay my tab, but this morning I was on a hot streak. I'm glad we stayed. You sure you don’t want to stay another night? You look like you could use it.”

“I’d love to, but it's clear by now no one here has seen Bearskin. He’s hard to miss.” I answered. Yet another instance of my past self being wrong.

Trish gathered her winnings, and I went over to pay my bill. The hostess on duty that day was Ashyn, who was an elderly woman with a grandmotherly air to her. Politely ignoring my poor state she greeted me, “Goodmorning master Wizard, checking out?”

“Yes, thanks what do I owe for my stay?” I inquired, reaching for my purse.

“Well, your room fees are 80 silver, your bath 2 more, and your meals 12 on top of that. Adding in your laundry and service fees your total comes to 98 silver.” She said politely.

I knew the cost would be absurd, but hearing it laid out was painful to hear. I handed her one of my five gold coins and said “Keep the change as a tip, but don’t give Simon as much as you keep for yourself.”

Then I laid on a bench and passed out until Trish came to get me.

I was woken by a kick to the thigh, before opening my eye I knew it was Roland. “Rise and shine. Oh, you're right, he does look terrible."

"Thanks, you're so kind. Are we all ready to go?" I grumbled as I gathered my belongings.

"Yeah, we'll have to camp on the road tonight, no way to make it to the next town before dark. And there weren't enough horses for sale for us all, so we just bought a donkey. His name is Tulip." Daulf said, the last part with a bit of joy in his voice.

The walk to the gate brought us through the wealthy district. Levar was visible through his front window, fighting with a tower of scrolls. We also passed the library and the Crystal Dragon Hotel. The guards were still stationed out front and looked bored and undisciplined. The wealthy residences near the gate I had only seen once before in the dark. They were constructed of stone that attempted to match the brilliant white of the Parlor’s exterior but fell short. Each property was surrounded by a fence that rose to a fortified stone wall at the edge of town.

As we exited the gate the guard came out to greet Daulf with... a big hug. They spoke quietly and I couldn’t hear, but when they separated the guard was crying tears of, what I assume were, gratitude. A little further outside the gate Daulf felt his jacket and pulled out a coin purse with a confused look.

He turned back to the guard, who was smiling sheepishly, and threw it back at the gatehouse yelling, “I told you, I will take no pay for doing what is right!”

The guard came out, smiling in full now, and retrieved his pouch. He shouted back “It was worth a try. Know you will always be welcome in my home!”

No one else seemed willing to ask Daulf what he did, and until now I had not remembered this interaction at all.

We left Crossroads a few hours past midday, which was mostly my fault as you saw. Somehow the role of group leader had fallen on me. Roland is generally against any form of leadership, Trish doesn't care and Daulf is Daulf. I was beginning to worry about the trouble Bearskin will get into if we don't find him. Roland didn't want to go either, but that has more to do with his total lack of desire to get where we are going. Daulf, as always, did whatever I asked.

I may have given you the wrong impression of the man. Daulf is the single most compassionate man I have ever met. One of the reasons it took us so long to enter the town of Crossroads was because he insisted on caring for as many of the wounded refugees as he could manage. Once his power was exhausted, he joined in to help build a school for the children. My dislike for the man lies entirely on the small fact that he would kill me if he found out who I really was. Not because he enjoys killing, but because he honestly believes that a sorcerer cannot be suffered to live without becoming a threat to innocents.

Daulf was a seeker assigned to protect the Tower's representative at Landing. His charge did not survive the fall of the city and he fled protecting a group of refugees. When we met up he took it upon himself to become my personal protector until new duties could be assigned to him. Despite my protests. He's a very difficult man to dislike, but I manage, privately at least. You would think with all his boundless compassion he would be willing to cure a hangover, but the first time I asked—before all this—he told me, in a practiced tone, “A hangover is your body trying to teach you a lesson, and it would be against the tenets of Illunia for me to rob you of that blessing.”

As we entered the forest a hawk cried out and descended from the sky. Trish and Daulf jumped to the sides in defensive positions. I... didn’t really notice and looked around dumbly. Again, remember how tired and sick I was, I'm usually very alert in a fight. Roland stood, smugly, and a beautiful hawk landed on his shoulder. “Oh I missed ya girl! Sorry I wasn’t with you last night, I had a,” he paused thinking before finishing “prior engagement in town.” Then he winked at me.

Why did he wink at me? I don’t know, again I need to emphasize, this whole day was a blur in my memory until I started writing it down.

Roland has had pets in the past but has never kept them long. Something about chains of oppression or tyranny of the strong. Honestly, I never listened, he can be a bit much, and it's been a while since he ranted about it. He has the uncanny ability to befriend creatures in no time at all and train them to help in whatever he needs. One time he found a squirrel and later that day it was stealing food from my saddlebag. He must have a Blessing, but he doesn’t strike me as particularly pious.

The walk was pretty brutal under the midday sun. Daulf led with Tulip, talking quietly to the donkey as we made our way. Roland’s hawk circled around most of the day, occasionally landing on Roland. Whenever she landed they would seem to converse for a bit before taking off once more.

The walk was uneventful. No one talked to me, Daulf and Roland were occupied with their animal friends and Trish spent the journey singing to herself. At some point in town she had picked up a mandolin and was plucking it as she sang a tune.

Before man, or sea, or sky or time

There was naught but him, the great, the Prime

He made the gods, austere, noblesse

Four he made, like him, but less

After creation, from here he fled

The gods were left adrift, unled

Together they began to make

Great works to cover their heartbreak

One day their works no longer fulfilled

The things they made had beauty but stilled

More like them they longed to make

Smart and wise, to heal the ache

The sisters discovered in error one day

To make more gods, there was a way

Sacrifice is what it did take

To give up your power for a new god to make

Rejoice they did, to no longer be lonely

But one god did hold to his power more fiercely

From the new gods sprung such wonder, our land

But the covetous god held his power and planned

Betrayal by him who never once gave

The cleverest was tricked and revenge he did crave

He planned and he plotted and then sprung his trap

Around his foe his power he did wrap

The sisters saw that their brother could not win

They chose at that moment to throw their lot in

Around Faust the Wardens constructed a prison

And created the world on which we are living

As darkness came, Roland, after conferring with his hawk, said there was a good place to sleep up ahead. We took a turn off the main road onto what seemed to have once been an old road. The trees here were lower and paving stones could be found between the roots. Traveling down this path for a half hour we came to the scattered remains of a fort of some kind. Finding the most intact circle of stones, we set out to make camp. Well, everyone else did. I was told to “sit down and stay out of the way” by Roland. So sit I did, I wrote my short entry for the day and fell asleep.

Strange, I remember more. I must not have been as asleep as I thought. Or maybe you are giving me this memory? Can you somehow perceive things or are you allowing me to remember things I heard while asleep?

Some time after I laid down to sleep, Roland came back to camp with some rabbits and set to cooking them on the fire. As he reached towards the fire to take them off, a necklace fell out of his shirt.

Trish saw it and asked in shock, “You worship Assuine?”

“Yeah, what of it?” Roland replied, gripping his talisman protectively.

Trish answered, “Well, you just don’t strike me as the kind of person to worship much of anything. In the brief time I’ve known you, you have been quite hostile to any and all authority figures we have encountered.”

Roland became more defensive, “That's the thing about you city folk, you just don’t get it. You think authority is something that can be taken and forced on others. Authority is inherent. If you need to force your authority on others, you ain't got it. A parent's got authority over a child 'cause they created that child and got a duty 'ta protect it. And like a mother Assuine created and protects us. For that, we owe her our service.” Seeing that she was surprised and a little taken aback by his harsh tone he paused.

In a softer tone, he continued, “She ain't too demanding and is generous with her Blessings, though they ain't the flashiest. I’ve ain't encountered anyone more worthy of service than her. The gods have authority over us whether you like 'em or not. Your will got no say in the matter. The only choice you get is to decide which god you want to help. Don't matter much what you do, anything you do serves one of 'em. They got the whole world divided up among 'em.” At that, he took a rabbit off the spit and walked out into the darkness alone.

As Roland retreated from the fire, Daulf spoke. “And what is it you believe Trish?”

Trish continued to sit there a contemplative silence. Daulf continued when he decided she was not going to answer. “There is some truth to what Roland says. Not that bit about authority, that was nonsense. Authority is not inherent, it is given, no one is ruled without consenting to it in one manner or another. But what he said about furthering the ambitions, that might be the truest thing I’ve heard the man say. The gods are real, I know you know that.”

At that last sentence, Trish seemed to shrink.

He continued, unaware of the reaction his words prompted. “Everyone knows, it’s as obvious as the dawn. They watch the denizens of this world with rapt interest. They bless those who worship them, but they Bless those who serve. The thing is, you don't need to worship to serve."

Daulf gestured to me. "That boy," he let out a heavy sigh and rubbed his forehead. "The only times Riloth's name passes his lips are when he says the date or stubs his toe. But that boy has been serving the will of Riloth since I ran into you two. Though I doubt he knows it. I've known a few of his Blessed over the years and you begin to be able to pick them out of a crowd. But lately I've sensed more pairs of eyes on him. He doesn't know it yet but he is destined for great deeds and the gods are watching. I only fear who those great deeds might serve. So think on what I've said before you say that you serve no god, because I sense eyes on you as well."

Daulf left Trish alone to be in her own thoughts and no more conversation was had.

That conversation... I've got to think on this.