《Getting Hard (Journey of a Tank)》18 - Temporary Clown

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The Mirdabon let out a pathetic squeak that made me feel guilty about kicking it, reminding me of the cuddly Wild Bumble Hares I had hunted with my human character. But unlike killing the hares, my kick only shaved off a pathetic sliver of the Mirdabon’s health bar.

Tanky little furballs. I had expected my unarmed damage to be much higher. Was this supposed to be their prank?

There, I thought as I faced the trio. Happy now of my pathetic damage on a level one monster?

And they were. Luds was laughing his head off, slapping Wharton’s who had also joined in. However, Nic gave me a concerned look. She was about to unsling her bow when Luds stopped her. There was a growl behind me. Alarm bells rang. The prank wasn’t over yet?

My head snapped back to the Mirdabon beside me. The cute pitiful face had twisted into an expression a devil would have if offered a drink that turned out to be holy water, its small beady eyes glaring at me with deep hatred. Its fur bristled, standing on end like an aggressive cat, and its white color turned into blood red.

“What the—?” Then it clicked. This was the reason Luds wouldn’t believe I hadn’t died in the forest—it was almost a miracle I didn’t step on one of these furballs hiding in the snow. And now, he wanted to test if I lied to him or not while also making fun of me.

In one swoop, the field of white furballs outside Kurghal Village also became red as if someone set the landscape ablaze. [Mirdabon Lvl. 2], [Mirdabon Lvl. 3], [Mirdabon Lvl. 4]. All of them grew like inflated balloons, their levels shooting up. All the Mirdabons around stared at me as if I was on the menu—although, these monsters probably didn’t understand the concept of a menu.

The Mirdabon I had attacked became [Lvl. 5 Mirdabon] for some bullshit reason. Its reddish color started to darken, and some of its fur hardened into spikes. I didn’t have to be a psychic to know what was coming.

All good things come to an end.

I’m a good thing. An awesome, tremendous, splendid thing. And this was my end.

My life flashed before my eyes.

From the time the heavens parted and angels sang of my birth, to my glorious descent on earth on a chariot of gold and light; my childhood spent wrestling mountain lions, to wearing the skin of the hydra I had slain while blindfolded…

Wait, this is a different life that’s flashing before my eyes.

But it was close enough to my own. A satisfied smile flitted on my face. “I’ve lived a good life...”

The Mirdabon horde hurled themselves at me, their little snouts flaring in anger, their mouths frothing, rows of tiny sharp teeth bared.

“The Great Herald Stone lives!” I proclaimed at the clouds and the icy mountaintops as I respawned. And the Great Herald Stone had already died twice while still at level one and with an experience bar still at zero. An awesome start to the journey of becoming the best tank, I sarcastically thought.

This was the first time I died of monster attacks, and it certainly won’t be the last, I thought as I turned around, gazing in the direction of the Golden Forest. It wasn’t that bad; small static shocks were all there was to it. If they implemented real pain in this game, just imagine the number of lawsuits the company would face.

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It turned out dying a lot was supposed to be the norm for new Mardukryon players passing through the Golden Forest, like newly hatched baby turtles on the beach making a run for the ocean, trying to survive getting eaten by predators or just dying from dehydration—I had read only one out of a thousand hatchlings survive to adulthood.

And just wow, I never expected the Mirdabons to be like that. I thought I had to watch out for a high-level monster, and then there was this? Were they a different challenge altogether?

What kind of starting area was this? Where was the warm and cuddly town like Amberkeld? Why those murderous freaks instead of almost harmless giant worms like the Horned Grublings?

“If only I had Madam Pomphrey’s stale buns,” I jokingly mumbled to myself. Consumable healing items wouldn’t have mattered anyway.

The damage of a Mirdabon’s attack wasn’t high considering they suddenly grew several levels above mine, taking about half a dozen bites to kill me. But given a bazillion of them surrounded me, I barely lasted a second.

I didn’t have the opportunity to try and eat the healing pods I picked up earlier. And even if I had an opening to escape, a bite from one spelled my doom. Once latched onto my body, the Mirdabons became very heavy, dragging me down to the ground. Its bite also had a bunch of other negative status effects that popped up. I wasn't able to read what they were because I died too fast.

Come to think of it, the leveling guides I had come across didn’t mention avoiding the Mirdabons. My hunch was that it was common knowledge in the early days of the game when Mardukryons were popular. And I finally understood why the available information for Mardukryon beginners focused on the most efficient leveling quests in the village—it was way better to level by completing non-combat quests given by NPCs and then move on to killing monsters after the player had gotten sufficiently stronger. That bastard Luds didn’t tell me anything about it.

“That arrogant jackass,” I grumbled as I galloped to the Golden Forest. To him, it was just a prank on a random newbie. In reality, it was a slight to the honor of a god.

Ignorance excuses no one.

I wasn't going to take the high road here and be understanding. I would break the ground and dig the deepest tunnel, going as low as I could—and there was my childish competitive side that had laid dormant since I was...well, since I was a child, or a teen rather.

In the times I had lost a PVP match, and that did happen a lot, I would feverishly dedicate myself to tweaking my build to win the next time I fought the same opponent. And it was worse when there was trash-talking involved, usually coming from the enemy DPS calling me 'soft'—the generic insult against tanks. It had more colorful variations. I recalled someone calling me, 'thin as a low-quality tissue paper that a finger could poke through when wiping’.

Insults would burn into my prideful brain, and I would refuse to sleep, spending entire nights planning and calculating builds. That was hard work given that I fought mostly whale players at a high level. There was a time I hadn't slept much for three days and Mum had to bring me to the hospital.

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If this happened to my kid self, my competitive side would rear its ugly head and I'd lose sleep over this prank. But I was an adult and understood the concept of delayed gratification, having gone through myriad hardships and challenges to reach where I was now. Any retribution against that jackass, Luds, could wait.

For now, I was going to be the clown, the court jester, while I was weak. Keep my head down until the time was right and I couldn't squeeze any more benefit from him.

I had two choices where to go: return to the village entrance to find Luds and his party, or turn left into the branching path I had skipped and find the side quest. The latter option seemed better as Luds had mentioned they were going somewhere so I'd likely miss them anyway. I could confirm if Luds was at least telling the truth about killing a Mirdabon as its objective to know that I'd have payoff by continuing to play the hapless noob for his entertainment. And if he was correct...then I'd have to come up with a plan to kill a Mirdabon. I have no fucking clue how to do that.

As I neared the Golden Forest, a third option presented itself. I slowed my pace and then came to a stop, digging my hooves deep into the snow to counteract my momentum—running through the snow was fun, and having four feet made it more enjoyable.

The pillar of smoke! There it was, rising from somewhere deep in the forest. Earlier, I had assumed it came from the Mardukryon settlement. But when I approached Kurghal village, there was no smoke rising past its walls. This is something else…

Looking for the shortest distance to the smoke, I lined myself up with it before entering the forest. Maintaining a straight path was going to be difficult, especially with trees in the way, but it was my best bet in finding the source of the smoke. I had no map or in-game notification to show me the way. This is as immersive as it gets. I thought of searching on the internet about how to use the sun as a compass but the glowing trees causing everything to cast several shadows would prevent me from using that method.

I proceeded slowly, making sure I wouldn't deviate from the correct direction. If there was a rock, a patch of soil not covered by snow, or roots wide enough for my hooves, I'd step on them even if it meant a little detour. And if I had no choice but to trudge through the snow, I carefully watched my way to make sure I wasn't stepping on any hiding Mirdabon.

Eventually, I found golden crystals again. These were smaller and fewer than the previous batch. Recalling my previous experience, I tapped the biggest crystal with my hoof, and it gave off the peculiar ringing sound.

Sure enough, a bunch of Mirdabons popped out of the snow and rolled away. Carefully navigating from one group of crystals to the next, each time repelling nearby Mirdabons with the ringing sound, I safely made my way through the forest without stepping on one of them.

The horn blasted once again. After listening to it a couple more times, I could confidently say the sound came from a different direction than the smoke. "There's more to this forest—" I began to say as I continued on my way.

"Squeak?"

My hoof had stepped on something squishy. I slowly looked down, knowing what was coming next. The patch of the white ground beneath my foot turned red. Other swathes of snow followed suit. And the rest was history.

Thrice more I died to Mirdabons. I was about to call it a day—or a night—and just rest. Then I remembered I was an adult and no one could tell me to go to sleep. Also, kid Herald Stone would be disappointed in me if I stopped now.

In my Nornyr Online days, several hours of continually wiping the floor trying to complete end-game quests were par for the course. Whale players could speed through content, but my friends and I were high schoolers with no money to spend on making our characters stronger, so we had to grind the hard way. Furthermore, a weak party meant more burden on the tank. Nonetheless, we always pulled through in the end even if it’d took hours or days.

If I returned to the past and gave myself one of those career questionnaires with the usual question, 'What do you see yourself in ten years, in twenty years,' kid me would answer 'Not being a weak piece of shit who easily gives up after dying a few times.'

That's right, kid me! I had to find what was at causing the smoke with the vigor of a leprechaun hunter looking for a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. With renewed determination, I entered the forest once again, deliberately slowing my pace more, stepping as much as possible on 'safe' ground. I also aimed for all the golden crystals I saw and rung them to clear my path. I remembered their locations after several passes. I made so many detours for safer paths I was certain I had made a mistake reestablishing my straight trajectory.

And, as expected, I was right.

Indeed, I missed my destination.

I knew it because I detected a faint scent of something cooking but couldn't see anyone or any fire nearby. An appetizing aroma of roasting meat; it had a strong side of gaminess, but I didn’t mind it. I racked my brain, but I couldn't figure out what kind of meat it was. Follow the smell!

Deeper into the forest I went. The trees grew closer, branches and roots grow wilder. A couple of times, I had to find another route because I couldn’t squeeze through the thick growth, but a bonus was that the crisscrossing roots rolling above ground provided me with safe passage from the Mirdabon menace.

At last, the trees parted, revealing the way to a wide circular space covered with neatly trimmed grass, accented by dozens of interesting plants. Not a hint of snow on the ground. The smell of cooking was coming from here. I could hear fire crackle, the meat sizzle. Guttural groaning came from something huge. I continued walking forward, eager to see what secrets awaited me.

A large creature sat in front of a roaring bonfire, carefully turning the hind leg of a gigantic monster I was yet to encounter.

A Mardukryon. Far larger than the ones I had seen.

[Mardukryon Lvl 43|Ancestral Flame Master: Mehubanarath]

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