Sicknesses and diseases are strongly affected by Numbers. Higher strength and charisma Numbers will significantly reduce the chances of succumbing to physical illnesses, while those with a higher wisdom Number are much less likely to suffer from mental illnesses. There are some exceptions to this, such as many genetic diseases, which don’t seem to be affected by Numbers at all. An interesting outlier is depression. While those with a higher wisdom Number are less likely to suffer from depression, among those with a similar wisdom Number, those with a higher charism Number are much more likely to suffer from depression than those with a lower charisma Number. While there are many theories attempting to explain this correlation, nothing has been conclusively proven.

- Medical Numbers, by Stewart

In the end, I put thirty into my intelligence Number, bring strength and dexterity up to one hundred even, and then dump the rest into wisdom. With my hurt leg, I’m tempted to increase my charisma Number as well. But the small difference in recovery time adding a few extra Numbers to charisma won’t make a significant difference. For now, I need to focus on those Numbers which will give me immediate benefits.

Besides, I’m not even sure if my leg is healing while my skill is covering it up. Does it put my injury into stasis while getting rid of the symptoms? That could be a good thing -- after all, I’m not sure if we took care of my leg in the way we should have a few nights ago. I don’t want it to heal crooked or anything if I can’t get to a doctor soon. On the other hand, it will take forever to eventually heal if I’m forever delaying the healing process.

Hm, I should be able to test that pretty easily. I look to a small cut on the knuckle of my index finger. It’s just a scratch -- I have no idea when or where it got scratched, but having spent over a week camping out I’m amazed at how the little injuries like that just seem to pile up. With a thought and a swell of effort, I activate my skill and the skin over the top of the cut smooths over as if it never existed.

A perfect test case. If the cut is scabbed over in a few days, I’ll know my wounds are healing beneath the usage of my skill. I can’t wait too long, or else it may be able to heal simply from the time I spend sleeping. I figure two days is a good amount of time.

We’re packing up our supplies, preparing to head out. This morning after breakfast we discussed our course of action for today, whether to search the town for better weapons and more supplies or to move on. We seemed to come to a consensus that searching for better weapons wasn’t worth the risk, until Styx brought up a factor I hadn’t seriously considered: showers.

Sure, almost every third thought I’ve had for the past few days has been getting clean -- every time I see the blood and dirt crusted under my fingernails, when I try to run my hands through my greasy matted hair, and just the general feeling of grossness after I use the bathroom without washing my hands afterward. But I never considered it an important need, not in comparison to getting home safe.

But then Styx brought up the serious points of infection and sickness, especially with all of our open cuts coupled with our low strength and charisma. And who knows what sort of diseases the blood and bodies of the monsters carry? A sickness could disable our effectiveness just as much as any monster attack.

Despite these points, I wasn’t completely convinced that exploring for a shower would be worth it. I’m sure there’s a river or stream around here somewhere we could use instead of trying to explore a house. But once the others considered the idea of a shower, there wasn’t any chance of us not taking the risk. Melete especially was adamant that she needed to get clean, although she wasn’t completely clear with her justifications. Even Pallas looked excited at the prospect or washing off the residual blood from the troll monsters. And my arguments against taking a risk just to chase a shower became much weaker when Melete bitterly raised the point that I only didn’t care because I could keep myself clean with my skill.

I had never even considered that as a potential use for my skill, but after testing I was amazed to see how well it worked. I felt bad using my skill on something so petty, especially since each additional modification using my skill made additional changes harder to bring about, but I couldn’t help breathing a sigh of relief at the temporary feeling of cleanliness. And then guiltily looking away from my companions’ angry glares.

As I finish packing up the rest of my supplies, I realize everyone else is already ready to go. I pick up the handles to the wheelbarrow and step to the front of our formation, with Pallas as usual taking up the rear. We had decided the closest farmhouse is our best bet, and should take less than fifteen minutes to get to. But if everything goes according to plan, we will be immediately moving on after exploring and getting clean, so there is no need to leave anything behind.

“We all ready to go? Remember, slow and safe.” I say.

“Yes mom,” Melete replies, rolling her eyes.

“Hey, better safe than sorry.” I reply, somewhat defensively. Styx simply gives me a thumbs up and taps on her ear. Oh yeah.

We had decided that it was best for Pallas and I to plug our ears before heading out, just in case Melete needs to use her skill on short notice. As she practices more, her skill is becoming noticeably more powerful. Where it previously only gave a slight headache that would eventually build up into a painful migraine as she continued to sing, now the first few seconds of her songs will induce an almost debilitating pain. I’m scared to consider what will happen if I listen to her sing for a minute or longer.

Instead of pulling out wads of cloth, I focus for a second until a layer of skin forms over my ear canals, instantly muting the surrounding world. I had considered trying to remove my eardrum entirely, which theoretically would completely cancel out the effects of Melete’s skill, but I’m afraid of what other side effects missing a portion of my ear would cause. I really need to get my hands on a biology textbook.

I give the group a thumbs up before swiping my hand twice forward with my fingers in a gun shape, the signal Pallas decided to use for ‘let’s go.’

We walk through the tall grass as I struggle to push the wheelbarrow ahead of me. I focus on navigating the wheelbarrow around any dips and ruts in the ground. Despite my split focus, I marvel at my additional perception from the increase in wisdom. My wisdom is significantly higher than it had ever been, and I can feel the difference as I observe the world around me.

It isn’t as if any of my senses have improved. No, my eyesight is still the same as a normal human’s, and my other senses haven’t suddenly become better either. My ability to make use of my eyesight, however, is what has changed.

Normally when looking around me, I can only focus on one thing at a time, only able to notice or react to things outside of my direct focus if they are particularly startling. After my increase in wisdom it feels as if my focus has widened, able to register and process things even from the corners of my vision. I’m actually starting to get a bit of a headache simply from trying to pay attention to everything at once.

It reminds me of the time about a year ago I went with my friends to watch the newest blockbuster movie on opening day. We were late to the theater and got stuck with seats on the front row of the 3D showing. The visuals were amazing, but by the end of the movie I felt overwhelmed and in pain from trying to process all the signals being sent to my brain. Hopefully I’ll be able to adjust to my new higher perception so I won’t have to endure a constant headache.

Eventually, we come to the edge of the farmhouse. Not wanting to make the same mistake as last time, I motion with a hand towards the barn. Leaving the wheelbarrow behind, the others take off their backpacks before we stealthily make our way to the front barn doors -- at least I hope it is stealthily. Without my sense of hearing, it is difficult to judge how quiet we’re being.

We swing around to the front of the barn and I notice a large padlock holding the giant doors closed. I give it a few tugs to verify it’s secure. There’s a smaller door off to the side, and Styx walks over to check it out. After attempting to turn the handle a few times, she looks back over and shakes her head.

I’m not sure whether to be pleased or disappointed. The secure barn likely means that there aren’t any monsters lurking within, but also makes looting supplies a more difficult prospect. I point over to the house and for the sake of Melete and Styx whisper, “Let’s check the house. We can try and break in later.” It’s weird talking without being able to hear my own voice, and I hope I’m speaking in a good volume. Styx gives me a thumbs up. I see Melete’s mouth move, but Styx just rolls her eyes and shakes her head.

Pallas is dutifully watching behind us as we sneak up to the front door. Locked as well. So far, this place truly looks undisturbed.

I raise my hand and swing my fingers in a twirling motion. It’s not a signal we discussed, but I hope they get the picture. At their looks of confusion, I sigh and whisper, “Backdoor.”

Melete and Styx’s eyes light up as they nod, and I lead the group around the side of the house. In the back there’s a leash tied to a post, but is otherwise empty. I take the three steps up to the porch on my toes, hoping the wood isn’t creaking. I try the door -- it’s locked as well.

Huh. I hadn’t expected something as simple as a properly secured house, although I should have realized that is the most likely situation. I’m worried less and less about monsters as time goes on -- the troll monsters clearly aren’t intelligent enough to lock the doors of a house behind them and we haven’t seen any other monsters since coming within the vicinity of the town.

Unless the monsters somehow managed to get locked inside the house, I think we’ll be safe. With only slight trepidation, I raise my arm and knock on the door. There’s no response from inside, so after waiting a few more seconds I lift my fist and bang even louder. A minute later, I use my skill to clear the skin covering my ears and turn to my classmates.

“Looks like it’s empty,” I say.

“What’s next? On to the next house, or break in?” Styx asks. Pallas is sitting at the corner of the house keeping watch. As we start talking he glances over his shoulder to our conversation, but rather than taking out his earplugs to join he just turns back around and keeps his gaze peeled for any monsters. I guess he’ll let us decide.

I ponder for a few seconds before I reply. “Let’s try and break in through a window here first, if we can. Better a little destruction of property than risking running into another troll.”

We walk around the house, checking the windows. None are able to slide open from the outside, so after checking each, I use the handle of my spade to crack the window next to the back porch and clear away as much glass as I can.

Melete is by far the smallest of us, so Pallas and I each crouch down to lift her through the new entrance. “Careful,” Styx says as she crawls through, “that glass could be sharp.”

“I’ve survived two fights with literal trolls in the last two days. I think I can handle a little casual breaking and entering.”

With those words Melete flips over the edge of the window and is inside the house. “Ouch!” I hear yelled out from inside. A minute later the back door opens, Melete standing in the entrance with a bloody finger stuck in her mouth. “Not a word.” She mumbles around her finger, then immediately turns around and walks further into the house.

Part of me wants to be concerned, but I can’t keep from smirking as I follow her inside.

With the lack of any monsters, we allow ourselves to relax a bit. Not completely -- we decide at least one of us needs to stay on watch outside, but those of us inside use the time to rest. After seeing that the water is running, Melete immediately claims first dibs on the shower and takes her sweet time in the bathroom. I’m enjoying the comfort of a reclining chair, while Styx is splayed out over the couch. It’s only been a few days since we left the cabin but I am truly appreciating the presence of a cushion again, content to sit in simple silence.

Eventually Melete comes out of the shower looking refreshed. Unfortunately, there’s no hot water, but that didn’t stop her from savoring every second of her time.

Styx looks up from the couch hopefully, and I smile. “Go ahead. I’ll go out and take over for Pallas in a few minutes. I can shower last.” Styx nods gratefully before standing and running to the shower.

Melete looks at me strangely. “You’re volunteering to shower last?”

It seems that while fighting monsters to the death side-by-side with classmates is perfectly normal in Melete’s eyes, but willingly waiting for a shower makes someone suspiciously saint-like. I shrug my shoulders. “I hate knowing other people are waiting to shower after me. Can’t really relax.”

“Well, your loss.” Melete replies. With a groan I pull myself out of the armchair and make my way outside.

I wander around until I finally find Pallas sitting on the front porch. “You can go inside, you’re next up for the shower. I’ll take over out here for now.”

Pallas looks over at me and doesn’t smile, staying where he is. The smile drops from my face and I walk over. “You okay?”

Pallas hesitates before speaking. “...do you think it will ever go back to normal?”

Wow, I wasn’t expecting such a heavy question. I think of how to respond and ask, “What brought this up?”

“I don’t know. I guess I’ve been thinking about it for a while.” Pallas says, his voice slow and deep. “From the moment we lost our Numbers, we’ve been struggling to survive, just going from one crisis to another. But recently, things have started to slow down.” I look at him strangely. “Well, I guess slow down isn’t really right. We’ve just finally gotten the chance to catch up. Making plans, allocating Numbers, preparing for the future.” He gestures to me, to the Numbers on his arm, and then to the surrounding world. “But the more we are able to catch up...the more I realize how far out of our depth we are. The more I think we may not make it out of this.”

“I...honestly don’t know.” I finally reply when I realize he’s finished. “I’m sorry, but I can’t say I know any more than you about any of this.”

He turns to face me. “...how do you do it then? You seem like you always have the answer, always know the solution.”

I laugh bitterly. “Really? Because I certainly don’t feel like it.” I look at Pallas seriously, considering, until I start speaking again. “To be completely honest...I made a choice. Before this all started, I...was confused. I didn’t know what to do. I was floating through school. I was floating through life. I had no purpose at all, nothing driving me -- and then the apocalypse happened and I lost all my Numbers.” Pallas has turned to face me, looking at me solemnly. “At first, I only had one choice: survive. But then I got my skill and I started to gain Numbers again. And I met you, and Melete, and Styx. Suddenly, I had choices, and my choices and decisions had purpose again. And so I made a decision.” I take a deep breath before continuing. “I decided to be the person you all needed me to be. I forced myself to be the leader who could make decisions and survive the apocalypse. And honestly? As sucky as this has been -- I’ve felt more alive these last few days than I have the entire rest of my life. I hope with all of my heart that the apocalypse ends and that we can find our families safe and sound. But I don’t hope this goes back to normal, back to how it was before this all started. Because I don’t think I could stand that.”

We sit in silence for a few moments, and I look down at my feet before continuing. “Sometimes it feels like we won’t make it, like I’m just an actor playing a part I’m not ready for, reciting lines I never memorized. Like any second the director will stop me and cut me from the part. But until then... I’m going to keep playing this part.”

I continue to stare at my feet. I’m afraid to look at him after my rambling speech. I don’t think I’ve ever shared something so personal, so deeply vulnerable, with anyone before -- not even my parents. I’m scared of what I’ll see on his face.

Eventually, Pallas stands up and mumbles. “Thanks, Atlas. That helps. I’m still not...I mean...thanks.” Pallas turns and walks away, leaving me unsure and alone with my thoughts.

S: 100 (+10)

D:100 (+20)

W: 308 (+105)

I: 73 (+32)

C: 54

0 (-165)

Skills: Adjust:Self