《Cultivating Earth [Hiatus]》Scene 15 - Ribbons and Secrets
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Waking in her bed was no surprise for Tara. She had fallen asleep after her heart exercises quite a few times recently, so having the courtyard as the last thing she remembered wasn’t particularly disorienting. What was disorienting was the tube attached to her arm and the cords attached… everywhere else. Her first motion upon waking – curling into a ball to try and retain the warmth and comfort of sleep – was thoroughly thwarted.
It made her grumpy. She did not like waking up tangled in annoying wires and tubes. She just wanted to curl up and go back to sleep. Less than half awake and thoroughly frustrated, Tara flailed at the annoyances, vaguely hoping that if she hit them enough they would go away.
“Tara. Tara! Calm down,” said a vaguely familiar voice. She looked up just enough to recognize the face of one of her floor nannies. “I’ll get the doctor to come and take this stuff off you but you have to relax.” The familiar voice, and its promise, brought her fully awake.
“What’s happening?” asked Tara, her voice dry but her face wet with frustrated tears.
“You’ve been asleep a long time. Over a week. The doctor had to hook you up to this stuff to keep you safe while you slept. Don’t worry, now that you’re awake we can take all of it off.” The nanny’s calm acceptance of the situation soothed Tara.
“Am I sick?” asked Tara.
“No, you were just really tired. Since we couldn’t wake you up we made sure that you could sleep however long you needed to, that’s all.” The nanny’s calm voice and smiling face reinforced the fact that she wasn’t sick.
The nanny quickly made a call before returning to Tara’s bedside. They chatted for a while and she told Tara all the things she missed while she was asleep. Tara thought about it for a while and decided that she wasn’t happy. Apparently, she’d slept for a really long time, which was fine, sleep was nice. But upon waking she found out that she’d missed all sorts of fun stuff. Why didn’t someone wake her?
It didn’t take long for the doctor to show up. The first thing he did, besides introducing himself to Tara, was to disconnect her from all the scary machines. He obviously wanted to talk to Tara, to see how she was doing, but as soon as Tara was disconnected she popped out of bed and ran for the bathroom, leaving a ‘be right back’ in her wake.
Once relieved she returned to her room only to find the doctor gone. “He said that if you could run like that you must be fine,” said the nurse with a laugh. Tara pouted at her for the teasing, but secretly she was happy because the doctor was gone.
“You ready to go take a shower? The school day has already started but if you hurry you can get there before lunch,” said the nanny.
“Do I have to?” asked Tara. The nanny just cocked her eyebrow at her as if to say ‘you know the answer to that, don’t you?’ With a dramatic sigh, Tara walked to the bathroom. Tara loved the bathroom here. Even though they all had to share it, there was a space where Tara could keep her shower things. Unlike her old orphanage, the girls here didn’t take stuff out of it without asking her. That meant that she didn’t have to lug her shower stuff to and from the bathroom. It was one of the many luxuries she loved about her new home.
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Mindful of the nanny’s words, Tara took her time as much as possible. If she was slow, she could get out of a whole school day! Unfortunately, the nanny figured out what she was doing pretty quickly so despite her best efforts she was forced to show up at school just in time for lunch.
Tara had, of course, tried to get out of going, but once she was there it was easy to be happy about it. Everyone told her how happy they were that she was back and how glad they were that she was okay. Tara loved the feeling, like everyone in the whole world was her friend. It made the school day surprisingly pleasant, especially when her teachers were so happy to see her that they couldn’t bear to give her homework!
Content that she was having a good day, Tara left the school with the other students to head to the courtyard for her heart exercise only for three of the funny men to come and stop her before she’d even made it halfway there.
“Tara, please come with us,” said one of the funny men.
“Why?” asked Tara belligerently. Some of the funny men were really nice, but others could be mean if you didn’t do what they told you. If these were mean ones then she didn’t want to go with them. Besides, she wanted to go with the other kids to do heart exercises.
“You’re going to practice in the gym today instead of doing heart exercises,” said the funny man calmly.
“But I wanna do heart exercises,” said Tara stubbornly.
“And you will,” said the funny man, “Just not today.”
“I want to do heart exercises!” she screamed at the top of her lungs. She wasn’t quite sure why she was screaming so loud, but it made her feel a little better so she went with it. In front of her, the three funny men winced slightly at her vocal assault. Despite that, none of them seemed moved. Seeing that screaming wasn’t working, she instantly switched tactics.
“Have I been bad?” asked Tara, he face and voice trying to project the plea that she was summoning up from the depths of her being. It seemed to work too. The disciples certainly softened in the face of her innocent cuteness - big eyes pleading, voice soft, lip quivering.
“No, you haven’t been bad but-“ said one of the funny men, but before he could continue Tara interrupted again, her voice returning to the shrill scream of before.
“Then why can’t I do heart exercises!” Whatever effect Tara hoped for her tantrum to have, the return to screaming had obviously pushed one disciple past the brink of endurance. In a single swift stride, he was in front of Tara. Before she had a chance to react the funny man had lifted her up by her armpits so that they were eye to eye.
“Enough,” growled the disciple. As he growled the word a new feeling consumed Tara. Somehow she could tell the disciple was the source of it but at the moment it didn’t matter. What mattered was that there was a pressure pushing down on her chest, stealing her breath and freezing her thoughts. Tara stared at the funny man in shock, her body hanging limply and her lip now quivering all on its own. After a moment Tara felt wetness running down her leg, but she couldn’t even bring herself to be embarrassed. Her whole mind, her whole world, was consumed focused on the man in front of her, without room to spare for a single thought of anything else.
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“Stop that this instant,” said a female voice from the down the hall. Immediately the pressure on Tara disappeared and the disciple set her down. Her mind a mess, Tara did the only thing her mind could manage to come up with – she ran. Somewhere in the back of her mind Tara realized she was running towards the woman that just saved her. That spurred her on.
Mindlessly Tara ran and, without a moment’s thought or hesitation, threw herself on the woman, eyes squeezed shut and sobbing pathetically. Tara felt herself get picked up, but that only encouraged her to wrap her arms tighter around the woman.
“There, there, little one. It’s all right. Nobody is going to hurt you. How about I take you to get cleaned up?” The woman’s voice was soft and soothing, working its way into Tara’s mind and calming her. Still, Tara didn’t even try speaking, simply nodding fiercely into the woman’s shoulder. She felt the woman turn to leave before pausing a moment and turning back.
“Master Zhao is waiting to speak with you three once you’ve cleaned up this mess,” said the woman before walking briskly in the opposite direction.
Tara was quiet all the way to the dorm, simply clinging to the woman and basking in her warmth. By the time they reached her room, Tara had calmed considerably but she hadn’t relaxed her grip in the least, far too comfortable in her embrace.
“Ma’am?” asked a soft voice that Tara recognized. She looked up to see the face of the nanny who had been there when she woke up that morning. Despite the familiar face, Tara clung to her savior, not wanting to lose her perch just yet.
“We had a little incident. I’m going to help her get cleaned up.” The authority in the woman’s tone let both Tara and the floor nanny know, in no uncertain terms, that she wouldn’t be leaving Tara’s side anytime soon.
“Yes ma’am,” said the nanny easily. “Anything I can help with?”
“I would appreciate it if you’d bring her some clean clothes.” The woman’s voice was soft and comforting again but the order buried within couldn’t be mistaken. The woman carried Tara down the hall to the bathroom, not hesitating to enter. With practiced movements, the woman helped strip off Tara’s soiled clothes and started the shower. Just when Tara was going to get in, she turned and saw the woman also stripping down.
“What are you doing?” asked Tara dumbly.
“I’m doing as I said. I’m going to help you get cleaned up.” The woman’s quick, graceful movements didn’t slow as she answered the question. “Get in now. I’ll be right behind you.”
Despite the woman’s order, Tara stood and watched as the woman disrobed. She was different than Ms. Rejya, Tara noted, leaner and taller, her skin more tanned and her hair more brown than black. To Tara, however, this woman was just as beautiful.
“Are you a fairy too? Like Ms. Rejya?” asked Tara nervously.
“Me? A fairy?” The woman seemed slightly taken aback for a moment before she beamed a huge smile at Tara and laughed a deep, feminine laugh. “Close enough, little one. Close enough.”
Showering with other girls wasn’t anything new to Tara, but this was different. Even when she’d needed help showering, the ladies at her old orphanage had always been brisk and efficient, pushing her to take care of herself as much as possible.
This shower was quite different. Rather than simply watching over Tara to make sure she washed properly, the woman took control. Throughout the entire process, she was gentle and calm, taking her time and giving Tara her undivided attention. The care the fairy lady showed throughout the entire process nearly had Tara in tears, though for an entirely different reason than before. She had to wonder if this was what having a mom was like. The process left her emotions all in a muddle, not sure how she should be feeling about the whole thing, or about the fairy lady.
Clothes were waiting for them when they got out, but when the fairy lady moved to help her dress, Tara felt the need to show that she could do it herself. She refused the fairy lady’s help and got dressed in record time. Once they were both dressed once again, Tara led the fairy lady back to her room, nearly skipping she was so happy.
In her room, Tara jumped up and sprawled out on the couch. Next to her, the fairy lady sat perched precariously on the edge of the couch with her back straight and her hands folded neatly in her lap.
“A lady should sit properly,” said the fairy lady. Somewhat chagrined, Tara moved to emulate the fairy lady’s posture.
“Ms. Fairy, what are we going to do now?” asked Tara anxiously. “Can we do heart exercises?”
“My name is Ms. Zirai,” said the fairy lady, “Not ‘Ms. Fairy’. And before we do anything else, we need to discuss what happened earlier. Can you tell me why you were so upset?”
“I don’t know!” said Tara, her voice climbing an octave. “The man just picked me up and then he got really scary. I thought he was gonna eat me or something! You’ll protect me from him, right?”
“He won’t hurt you, Tara, I promise,” said Ms. Zirai. “But I meant before that. You were throwing a tantrum about something. What was it?”
“I wanted to do heart exercises but the funny men kept telling me no,” said Tara fiercely. “They were mean.”
“Funny men?” said Ms. Zirai, a smile gracing her lips.
“Yeah, you know, the men that are always wandering around helping out but never tell anyone their names? Nobody has ever told me what to call them, so I just call them the ‘funny men’ because they talk funny and wear funny clothes.” That got a genuine laugh from Ms. Zirai.
“You can call them ‘disciples’ Tara. I am a disciple as well, though I hope you won’t think of me as a ‘funny man’.” They both giggled at the absurdity of that idea before Ms. Zirai continued. “No matter how funny they are you need to listen to them, Tara, just the way you would listen to any of your teachers in school.”
“But I wanna do heart exercises,” whined Tara.
“I’ll make you a deal,” said Ms. Zirai. “If you come to the gym and work out with me, I’ll do heart exercises with you afterward. How does that sound?”
Tara thought about it for a long moment. “You promise?” she asked hesitantly.
“I promise,” replied Ms. Zirai immediately.
“Ok,” said Tara, bouncing up off the couch. “Let’s go.”
Once they reached the gym, Tara dutifully followed along with Ms. Zirai, first performing stretches and doing several laps around the gym before spending some time on the balance beam. Ms. Zirai impressed upon Tara that the balance beam was very important for a young lady such as her, which made Tara concentrate super hard on doing a good job. Ms. Zirai's efforts confused Tara, however. Normally when she practiced on the balance beam she was told to do silly stuff, like stand up and sit down a bunch, practice turning around, things that took little effort. Ms. Zirai, however, had Tara focus on walking from one end of the beam to the other. As she did, Ms. Zirai constantly reminded her to stand up straight, to keep her head up, to keep her hands at her sides if at all possible. Tara fell more than once, but Ms. Zirai caught her effortlessly each time.
By the time Ms. Zirai told her she could come down, Tara was covered in sweat and thoroughly sick of the balance beam. Gratefully, she flopped down onto the mat. "Ready to do some heart exercises?" asked Ms. Zirai. As if she'd been jolted with electricity, Tara shot up off the mat, hopping excitedly.
"Really? Really?" she asked while bouncing exuberantly.
"Really," said Ms. Zirai. "Go ahead and sit here. We're going to do some special exercises, just the two of us." Tara quickly complied and took up the pose she'd been taught for her previous heart exercises. Ms. Zirai reached over and took Tara's hands, moving them to face palm up atop her knees. "Like this, little one."
After a moment, Ms. Zirai sat in front of her and assumed the same position. "Now close your eyes and breathe with me. Imagine the light surrounding you. Imagine the light as a river. It flows through you, fills you up and cleanses you, but then flows onward, leaving nothing behind."
As soon as Tara imagined the light she could feel it pressing on her skin, almost as if it was begging for her to let it in. Tara happily complied, opening herself up. The light poured in, rushing through her. "Allow the light to flow through you," reminded Ms. Zirai. "Let it come and go, passing through you." As she spoke, Tara could feel the light moving through her. Rather than pool in her belly, however, it simply flowed through her body before flowing back out again. The sensation was strange but invigorating and Tara marveled at how the behavior of the light was so different from before when it seemed to gather in her tummy so naturally.
They sat for a long time, the light flowing through them, enjoying the feeling of it washing their bodies clean.
The next morning Tara finished getting ready and made her way to the lobby like normal. To her surprise, it wasn’t just the other girls of her floor waiting for her when she reached the lobby. There, standing in front of the stairs down, was Ms. Zirai. Beside her were two of the disciples that had wanted to take her to the gym yesterday. She barely noticed them, however, save to note that the scary one wasn’t there.
As soon as she saw Ms. Zirai, Tara kicked up her heels and ran to her, throwing her arms around Ms. Zirai’s waist in a giant hug. “Good morning little one,” said Ms. Zirai kindly while patting her on the back. “Go stand with the others now. We have something to tell you all.”
Tara nodded but hung on for a long second before letting go and taking up her place with the other girls. They chatted quietly while they waited for Gina, who was always the last one, to join them. Once she did, Ms. Zirai called the girls to order.
“As of today,” she said seriously, “The three of us will be your new Floor Elders. I’m Elder Zirai, to my left is Elder Ordis. On my right is Elder Kwan. We, all of us together, make up the floor of the Six-Heavens Pegasus. If you need anything, ask us and we will definitely help you.”
One of the girls, Chloe, raised her hand. “What’s a Pegasus?” she asked seriously.
“A Pegasus is a very special horse. It has wings and can fly through the air as easily as run on the ground. The Six-Heavens Pegasus is particularly special since it has four wings with feathers of all different colors and can fly really fast.”
Another girl raised her hand but Ms. Zirai held up her hand in the ‘stop’ gesture. “I know you all probably have lots more questions, but we need to get to practice.” Suiting actions to words, Ms. Zirai descended the stairs, the other elders following her closely.
The school day passed much as all the other ones had after that. The after-school sports time went as normal, but Ms. Zirai met Tara afterward and separated her from the other kids who were going to meditation practice.
“Want to try something special?” asked Ms. Zirai.
“Like what?” asked Tara dubiously. In her experience, ‘special’ was not really a good thing. In her old orphanage, a ‘special’ trip often meant going to the doctor, or the dentist, or something equally bad.
“You’ll like it. Promise,” said Ms. Zirai. “Come to the gym with me.” Tara followed behind her with hesitant steps, not quite sure she trusted Ms. Zirai. Still, she didn’t have much choice, so follow she did. Inside, she found that the large mat at the far corner of the gym, one more than forty feet across, had two long ribbons laid out on it. The ribbons were wide, nearly a foot across, and laid out they stretched almost half the length of the mat. Tara walked up to one, eyes wide, as its colors shimmered and sparkled in the harsh light of the gym.
“Go ahead,” said Ms. Zirai, “You can touch it. That one is for you anyways. The other one is mine.” As if to prove her words, Ms. Zirai walked over and picked up the other ribbon off the floor. With a flourish, the ribbon’s entire length floated into the air before seeming to coil towards Ms. Zirai of its own accord.
“This is a silk ribbon. Gymnasts use them for dancing. How about I give you a demonstration?” With the silk ribbon fluttering and twinkling in front of her, Ms. Zirai’s words took on an ethereal, enchanting quality. Tara could only nod dumbly as she watched.
“Good! I knew you would like this,” said Ms. Zirai. “Go sit on the edge of the mat and I’ll start.”
Tara dutifully moved out of the center, dragging her ribbon along behind her. Once she was seated she greedily wrapped up the rest of her ribbon so Ms. Zirai wouldn’t step on it. Seeing that Tara was settled, Ms. Zirai took up a stance, posture upright and ribbon draped along her left arm. A wooden handle, much like the one Tara discovered on the end of her ribbon, was gripped firmly in her right hand. Ms. Zirai turned and gave a funny bow.
“Bow to the heavens,” she announced seriously before turning to face Tara and bowing again. “Bow to the audience.” Then she turned and faced the large expanse of the empty mat. Without another word, her arm rose and her wrist flicked out. The ribbon, acting as a dutiful pet, rose and snapped out, stretching out to billow briefly like a long flag in the wind. Just as it started to fall, Ms. Zirai moved.
Her leg kicked up sharply forward, rising above her head as she leaned backward, her left hand high and right hand dipping towards the floor. In a move too fast for Tara to follow, Ms. Zirai twisted, spinning on her planted foot and raising her right arm gracefully. The ribbon snapped taut once again, following her movement into a tight rising spiral that nearly hid her lower half behind the wide-stretched fabric of the ribbon. Just as the ribbon was reaching above her waist, Ms. Zirai, now with both feet firmly planted on the floor, seemed to hop lightly and lay back. Tara stared in awe at the resulting move as Ms. Zirai seemed to float up and back, her feet flying high as she flipped gracefully out of the ribbon’s encirclement. As she reached the peak of the flip her right arm snapped out, causing her to twist gracefully. The ribbon followed, arcing up into the air before spinning downward in a funnel pattern.
The dance went on and on, Ms. Zirai sometimes stepping nimbly around the ribbon, seeming to lead it along as if she were coaxing a beloved pet, at other times displaying astounding acrobatics as she seemed to glide effortlessly between the different strands of the floating, coiling ribbon. All the while the ribbon followed, creating great circular shapes in the air, seeming to float and glide effortlessly along whatever path was drawn for it. Sometimes Ms. Zirai would snap her wrist and a wave would float through the ribbon, seemingly gentle but moving fast.
Tara was thoroughly engrossed with the performance as she attempted to capture every arc and curve of the ribbon’s dance. When at last it came to an end, Tara sat motionless for several moments before looking up at Ms. Zirai with bright, shining eyes.
“You can teach me to do that?” she asked, her face a mask of hope and longing.
“Would I give you a ribbon if I didn’t think I could?” replied Ms. Zirai. Tara’s response was a giant smile and a full sprint onto the mat to wrap her arms around Ms. Zirai once more. After a moment Tara stepped back, her face flushed with excitement.
“Ready to start?” asked Ms. Zirai. Tara nodded enthusiastically, her head bobbing up and down so fast she felt dizzy.
“Okay, the first thing is the handle. You need to hold it like this…”
Time passed quickly as Tara lost herself in the joy of the sparkling, shimmering ribbon floating gently around her. Ms. Zirai led her patiently and though Tara fell often, stepped on her ribbon, had it fall on the floor, and a dozen other things, she never once showed any sign of annoyance.
Not until Tara got tired, at least. Finally, Ms. Zirai turned around from demonstrating a motion to find Tara standing with her shoulders slumped, her arm waving lazily, making the ribbon bounce through the air in a desultory fashion.
“Enough,” snapped Ms. Zirai before taking a deep breath and continuing more gently, “If you’re tired then take a break. Just remember that you can’t make the ribbon dance with just your arm. It requires your whole body, your whole self, to be dedicated to every motion.”
Rather than walk off the mat, Tara flopped down gracelessly right where she stood. Ms. Zirai just watched with a lopsided smile, thinking fondly of her first days learning the silk ribbon dance. After letting Tara rest a bit she ushered her off to the dorm.
The next afternoon proceeded much the same way, with Ms. Zirai dancing gracefully with her ribbon and Tara bumbling along behind her, desperately trying to emulate her poise and finesse. On the third afternoon, however, they had barely gotten started when Ms. Zirai stopped her.
“Come, there is something you should see,” she said playfully. She led Tara out to the courtyard. All the students were arranged in neat rows, each lost in their own meditations. Tara felt a deep pang of longing as she looked at all the peaceful, happy faces. She wanted to join them so badly!
Ms. Zirai interrupted her self-pity with a pointed finger. “Look, over there. The second row from the back on the far side.” Tara followed the pointing finger but didn’t see anything special. She was just turning her head to ask Ms. Zirai what she should be looking at when it happened. A snap, inaudible but clearly felt, passed through the courtyard, then a dazzling collection of silver and blue lights floated up from the ground and surrounded the boy that Ms. Zirai was pointing at. The lights floated slowly at first, but gradually they sped up, swirling faster and faster until it looked as if the boy was surrounded by a silver and blue tornado. Just as Tara was certain that the lights couldn’t go any faster they froze before dashing at the boy, each threatening to strike him. Tara covered her mouth in horror, but rather than collide with the boy they passed into him, disappearing into his body until not one was left. A moment later the boy himself seemed to glow with the same silver and blue light before it detached, forming a long, sinuous shape. It coiled around the boy a few times before raising itself up and stretching out bat-like wings, seeming to shelter the boy. The long neck of the light-beast stretched high, its snout opening to reveal a massive fanged maw as the beast seemed to roar soundlessly at the heavens.
After a moment the beast disappeared and the boy toppled, unconscious.
“What was that?” asked Tara, her face stuck somewhere between fright and excitement.
“That was the boy becoming special,” said Ms. Zirai, “Special like you.”
“Like me?” asked Tara. “Is that what happened when I fell asleep?”
“Something like that,” said Ms. Zirai with a laugh. “You were a little more spectacular.”
“So what does it mean? How are we special?” Tara’s voice was full of wonder and curiosity, her little heart filled with joy at the idea of being special.
“That’s a secret for now, little one. Someday, when you’re older, I’ll tell you the whole story,” said Ms. Zirai softly, a gentle smile on her face. “Someday the whole world will know you’re special.”
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