C19 Trash Team

Eddie was currently in the large basin area getting bombarded with questions by 40 excited guild members.

“Eddie! What do we do!!!”

“I’m going to have a heart attack,” another player said.

Eddie was scratching his chin as he tried to think while ignoring them all. The two poor NPCs were hiding in a small area dug out by Robo and were watching the entire thing.

“Eddie, look,” Mira said as she showed him a notification.

You have received a joint quest: Migration Crisis

You must help the player: EDDI3456 achieve his quest.

Rewards:

+300,000 EXP

+20 Gold

Three Jelly Beans

Time Limit: 7 days

“What? Why are you getting 300,000 experience and I’m getting 4,000?”

“That’s really good for our level, that would put me into 25,” Mira explained. “The experience scales to our level.”

“Oh,” Eddie said in dismay. It really sucked for him but still the experience he was getting was also good for his level so it made some sense.

“Sir, are you ok?” Frank asked as he walked up next to Eddie.

“Fine, Frank, how are the two NPCs?”

“Surprisingly in high spirits. I will have them working for you shortly, Sir.”

Eddie was not happy about how eager Frank was to put them to work but as of right now he had other things to worry about.

“Eddie,” Mira said. “You need to tell us what we need to do. Everyone’s waiting on you.”

“Ok, ok. Guys! Listen up!”

The entire guild immediately went quiet and the trashmancer cleared his throat.

“We need to make a settlement. Here are the requirements to do it,” Eddie explained, showing the message.

“What? 300 Gold? That’s more than we have in the guild bank?”

“A T2 Relic, we might as well-”

“Shut up!” Mira shouted. “Everyone knows the experience is really good. For most of us that’s two weeks worth of grinding. Eddie has allowed all of you to stay here first and we all owe him something. So stop complaining and start thinking.”

Eddie noticed that Brody, the Vice Guild Master, was staring needles into him. There was a permanent scowl stretched across his face. Eddie just ignored him; he really didn’t care who Brody was and there were far more important things to worry about than someone not liking him.

“So Mira, how do I get a T2 Relic?”

Mira cleared her throat. “Raid Boss- they always drop a Relic but most of the time it's Tier 1 and not 2.”

“R-raid boss?” Eddie questioned. “Like an omega boss?”

“Omega boss? They apparently don’t give relics only really, really good loot. Have you seen one before? They’re so rare.”

“Oh, no,” Eddie lied. “Just heard about them.”

Eddie had actually discovered an Omega Boss on his very first day in the trash dump and it was located a few hundred metres away from him. He didn’t know what to do at first with it so he just blocked the entrance off.

“So what’s a raid boss?” Eddie asked.

“Maximum of 50 people fight against one giant monster and it's minions. Our guild has done a level 17 and 20 one before. They’re good for loot but they take a day to respawn so grinding mobs is the best way for experience.”

“Are there any raid bosses down here then?” Eddie asked.

Mira shrugged. “We’ve all just been farming the outskirts of the main areas. We wouldn’t even think about going into the centre. The experience is not worth it.”

“I think I’ve seen a raid boss!” a guild member shouted out. “Near Goblin’s Gulch.”

“Goblin’s Gulch,” Eddie thought.

“Probably a shaman,” Viktor remarked. “I doubt it would give us a T2 Relic.”

“Where else can we start?” Denzel offered. “We might as well try. Send some scouts out to see if we can find it.”

“Are raid bosses hard?” Eddie asked the guild innocently.

They all started laughing.

“Raid bosses are considered one of the hardest things to do in games. Don’t even think about an omega boss.”

“Are omega bosses really that hard?”

“An omega boss hasn’t even been killed in Arindought yet. They’ve been killed in only two out of the twelve cities so far and they were low level. People have killed thousands of raid bosses so far,” Mira explained. “Plus, omega bosses are rare spawns. They don’t respawn and are very hard to find.

“Ok, ok,” Eddie said, eyebrows raised. “So we should try and see if there’s a raid boss there and then you guys kill it?”

“You guys?” Denzel questioned. “You’re a part of this quest too, man. We all gotta fight it even if you’re gonna slap it with that pool noodle.”

Eddie went bright red from the shame, embarrassment and now fear. He didn’t want to even look at raid boss, a trash panda or snotty trash goblin was enough freight for him. “I’ll think about it.”

“Ok. Listen up!” Mira shouted. “We need at least three scouts to go and look for it. Depending on where it is, expect us to leave tomorrow at midday for it. The rest of you go work on some skills and repair your armour before we leave.”

Eddie was panicking even more now. But, at least he didn’t have to spend 10 million dollars on a single item in the game- he actually had to get it himself, with the help of high ranking guild members.

Eddie headed back to his trash workroom and laid his back on the workbench. The hardness of it felt good as it realigned his posture. Frank came back a minute later with Robo snickering at his heels.

“Are you ok, Sir?”

“Fine, Frank, just a lot to process right now.”

“Just to let you know, I’ve been through the rules of the job with Jimmy and his daughter rose- the two NPCs.”

“Go on.”

“Well, Sir. They will be doing exactly what I was doing and will be paid 20 coppers a day.”

“Isn’t that a bit low?”

“Far from it actually, Sir. He told me that was being paid 10 coppers for a 12 hours shift at a refrigerator factory with no breaks. He really is the bottom of the barrel. I offered him 50 coppers a day but he moved it down to 20.”

“What a nice guy,” Eddie said, truthfully. “And the daughter?”

“She will help out, and has already taken a liking to Robo surprisingly, Sir.”

“Cool,” Eddie said.

A knock came on his workshop door and Frank opened it. It was Mira and her team. “Hello, Lady Mira, what can I do for you?”

“Is Eddie there? We need to speak to him about something.”

Eddie shook his head but Frank still let them in.

“Hey, Eddie,” Mira said. “We need to train you.”

“Train me? I’m not a dog.”

“No, you’re not,” Mira mused, chuckling. “If you’re going to have to take part in the raid then you need to practise your skills. You do have skills… Right?”

“Spells, and a passive skill.”

“Right, come out into the basin and show us.”

Eddie groaned as he hopped off the workbench. “Oh, Frank, can you spread the word to the other players that if they see any more NPCs to bring them here.”

“Of course, Sir. Good luck with your training.”

Eddie smiled as he gave the metal golem a big hug. “Thanks, Frank.”

“You’re welcome, Sir.”

“Come on you little weirdo,” Denzel joked.

“Yeah, I’m coming, I’m coming.”

As they left, Frank was relieved that Eddie was getting friends. He desperately needed them. Overall, he was glad that Mira and her team were helping him out. His pleasant thoughts were immediately taken away by Robo who was currently gnawing on his leg.

“Stupid dog, get off!”

Eddie and Mira’s team arrived at the basin where a few other guild members were practising skills and magic, trying to level them up. Brody was there too with his pompous attitude showing above the rest.

“Ah,” Mira said, glancing at some notifications. “It’s the Guild Master, you guys go on and help Eddie, I’ll catch up.”

“You ok?” Denzel asked her, she seemed agitated.

“Yeah, we’re having problems paying rent. She’s really stressed.”

“Alright,” Denzel said.

“Is everything alright?” Eddie asked once Mira had disappeared into the trash compacted caves.

“Not really,” Viktor replied, lighting a cigarette. “The guild is going into bankruptcy soon.”

“MEAT TRICYCLES! PICKLE HER PANTIES AND SPRAY MY FEROMONES INTO THE MAJOR’S EYES!”

“Eddie should know,” Denzel backfired. “And yeah, Viktors right. We are losing money so fast. The trade minister upped all the rent prices.”

“They can do that?”

“Uh, huh,” Denzel said, grudgingly. He rolled his shoulders as he unhooked a metal vest he had been wearing. Denzel was huge, his frame was that of a body builder yet had the look of a fighter. “Alright, Eddie, punch me.”

Eddie took a step back. “No.”

“C’mon,” Denzel said, “You got this. Punch me.”

“I’m a mage, not a boxer or something.”

Viktor stood behind Eddie and slowly pushed him forwards. “Guys,” Eddie said, hastily. “I-I-I don’t think I’m ready for this.”

“C’mon, Eddie!” Denzel exclaimed. “Hit me!”

Eddie’s face contorted out of fear. Denzel was massive, like a brick wall. The punch was going to hurt himself more than Denzel.

“Ok! You asked for it though!”

Eddie threw a wild haymaker at Denzel’s face- his thumb was clenched in his fist and his posture was all over the place. The fist connected with Denzel’s chest, it was slightly of course but at least hit something. Eddie reeled back from the pain vibrating through his entire arm.

“What are you made of?”

“You said you were military?” Denzel questioned.

“I am,” Eddie insisted. “I’m not a fighter. I just fixed things.”

Viktor scoffed. “You cannot lie to me.”

“I’m not,” Eddie pleaded.

Denzel clicked his teeth. “I won’t lie Eddie, my little cousin can hit better than you.”

“I mean, probably. They're all going to be 7ft tall like you.”

Denzel started chuckling. “Not at all, man. I suffer from acromegaly.”

“What’s that?” Eddie questioned.

“He’s a freak show,” Viktor answered.

“I’m not a freak show. It’s like gigantism, ever heard of it?”

“You’re a giant?” Eddie questioned, squinting his eyes.

Denzel nodded. “I won’t lie, I don’t think you’ll be able to fight.”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to say,” Eddie stated. “I can still throw spells and stuff.”

“WELCOME TO HOGWARTS, THE SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY!”

“He says, let’s see it,” Viktor said.

“YOU’RE A WIZARD HARRY!”

“A WHAT?!”

“A WIZARD!”

Viktor and Denzel started laughing while Bear just stood there staring at Eddie without blinking.

“What did he say?” Eddie questioned.

“He said you’re a wizard, did you not hear him?” Viktor joked.

Eddie started grumbling to himself. He hated that he was the only one that couldn’t understand Bear. He opened his palm towards Denzel and angrily shouted: “TRASH CHUTE!”

Denzel watched- amazed, at a moldy cheeseburger that was thrown at his chest. It squelched against his bulging pecs and slid onto the compacted trash ground.

“Did you just… Fire a cheeseburger at me?” Denzel asked, eyebrows furrowed.

“Maybe,” Eddie said, tightening his posture up.

“Do it again,” Denzel instructed.

“I can’t,” Eddie professed.

“What do you mean you can’t?”

“I mean, it summons something random.”

“How random?”

“Random. Like, literally anything.”

“Do it again then.”

Eddie complied and fired a half broken beer keg towards him. Denzel caught it and watched as it turned into cubes and fell away.

“Eddie,” Denzel said. “What’s your class? You do have one, right?”

“Urmmm… Tch, tch, tch, A urmmmmmmmmmm- Trashmancer?”

“Trashmancer,” Denzel repeated. “You… Summon trash?”

“Yep, and walls of it.”

“Can you summon my ex-wife?” Viktor asked.

“Probably,” Eddie answered honestly. “Also dead things, that’s pretty weird.”

“And the wall?”

“One minute,” Eddie said as he brought out his woggle tube from his inventory. He hadn’t really used it at all since he got it.

So there Eddie was, in the middle of his trash base, dirty, shirtless, and holding a woggle tube menacingly.

“You’re an enigma, Eddie,” Viktor remarked.

“Hey, the system gave me this,” he whined. “I didn’t make it myself.”

“That makes it even worse,” Denzel said. “Let's not get off topic. Summon the wall.”

Eddie cleared his throat as he loosened his body. “Trash Wall!” he shouted, aiming the woggle tube for just in front of him.

“Now that’s handy,” Denzel stated. “Can you rotate it?”

“Yeah, it costs me a tonne of mana,” Eddie said as it started to rotate it into a platform.

“Viktor, get on,” Denzel said.

“I am not going to get on a floating square of trash,” Viktor complained.

Denzel looked at Bear who took no time getting on it. He leapt up and immediately Eddie’s mana pool was being sucked dry. “I can’t hold it anymore. It’s going to fall.”

Bear hopped off it within a split second and Eddie fell down exhausted. It was strange, he hadn’t felt like this before when his mana was at 0. The wall of compacted trash fell onto the ground and started falling away.

“Why do I feel awful?” Eddie asked, rubbing his temples.

“It’s a side effect of using so much mana so quickly. It’s like limitations that the game makes so you can’t just drop every single bit of spell you have and then just leave,” Denzel replied.

“That’s annoying,” Eddie remarked.

“Tell Mira that, she mentions it every day.”

“So you have two spells, anything else offensive or defensive?”

“A scavenging type skill. I can just see trash that’s useful.”

“Alright,” Denzel said, “Let’s work on these spells.”

Eddie was perplexed at what he meant. “Work on these spells. Don’t I just use them and they level up?”

“You’re an idiot,” Viktor spat.

“Fudge you,” Eddie replied.

“No, man. You can just level them up by casting them. But using them in different ways will increase the speed at which they do.”

Since Eddie was referred to by most as a noob, of course he didn’t understand. Denzel started to explain to him how he levelled his skills up so fast.

“Ohhhh,” Eddie said.

“Yeah, you got it. All you gotta do is use them in creative ways. Your trash wall for instance has so many uses. You can block things, move it, levitate people up and probably morph it into another shape. Try it out.”

Eddie glanced at his full mana bar before activating the spell. His mana was transferred into his woggle staff of unrelenting doom and the trash wall was formed in front of him.

“Ok, ok,” Denzel said. “Now, try and think that you want it to be a circle.”

“Just think?”

“Yeah. The system reads your mind.”

“I didn’t sign up for that!” Eddie declared.

Yep, you did, have it in the contract you signed at the beginning. I know all your fetishes.

“Nevermind.” Eddie then thought about crafting it into a circle and the trash slowly bent to his will. “Holy fudge, that’s awesome! It’s costing me less mana to hold it now!”

“Now Eddie,” Denzel said. “Start spinning it around you. Wait, let us move out of the way first.”

Eddie carefully watched his mana tick down as they moved away.

“Go on!” Denzel shouted a fair distance away, rightly so.

Eddie held his woggle staff in front of him as he slowly turned around.

“Eddie! Don’t move, command it around you!”

He wasn’t listening as he and the trash circle were spinning together. His eyes slowly drifted off his mana bar and towards it as a smile spread across his face. “This is amazing!” There it went, all his mana- gone. Eddie fell backwards and the mana linking himself and the circular wall of trash was disconnected. But the trash didn’t break away and fall apart; it broke free from the bounds of Eddie’s mana and sailed into the air.

“Watch out!” Denzel shouted.

It was aiming straight for a group of guild members, specifically Brody. The man looked up just as the trash compacted circle connected so perfectly with his spotless forehead. It didn’t do any damage or send the man barrelling, it was just a light reminder that he was an asshole.

Eddie sat up like a toddler and looked over. “Sorry!” he shouted, hands covering his mouth.

Brody just shook his head as he turned back to his group. Denzel ran over and helped Eddie up. The giant man leant in close to his ear to whisper. “Did you do that on purpose?”

“Surprisingly no,” Eddie responded.

“Good shot,” Viktor said.

“Guys, I didn’t mean it.”

“THE PRINCE WEARS A CROWN OF THORNS TO HIS BAR MITZVAH!”

“Even Bear say’s you meant it.” Denzel said.

Mira burst out of the tunnel with tears in her eyes.

“Mira, you ok?”

She shook her head as her hands blocked her teary eyes. Denzel ran over with the rest of her team and he hugged her. He didn’t say anything.

Eddie slowly walked up cautiously, he didn’t do well with emotions and certainly had no control of his own at the moment; he didn’t want to get involved but still felt he had some duty to her.

“Is everything alright?” Eddie asked.

She wiped her snotty face. “We just lost the guild hall and most of the members up top just quit.”

“What?” Denzel questioned. “Why?”

“She was 30 gold short on the payment and w-when she asked them for help they all just left.”

Denzel screwed up his face. “Those unloyal bastards.”

“We do not need them if they would leave at the smallest inconvenience.”

“But we have no guild hall now.”

“Uhh, guys? I can probably make one in about 30 minutes.”

She shook her head. “It needs to be in at least a settle-” Mira suddenly realised that she was doing the quest in order to make a settlement. “Let me go call her.”

Eddie put his hands on his hips in victory.

“You a legend, Eddie,” Denzel said.

“You help me, I help you.”

Mira came back a few minutes later with a dried face, she looked like the Mira that Eddie had always known. “The Guild Master is coming down soon, she needs to speak to you.”

“What’s she going to ask me?” Eddie questioned. “I can rent it to you guys for cheap.”

“I know, thank you Eddie, but she doesn’t know you at all. She said she’s going to come down with the remaining members.”

“Ok, she’s not scary is she? I’m imagining her beating me up.”

Denzel bulged his eyes while furrowing his eyebrows. “Urm- no, she’s urm- she’s uhhhhh, a lovely woman.”

“That is a lie,” Viktor said. “She will eat you alive.”

Eddie gulped. Women often terrified him, like his ex-girlfriend. “When’s she coming?”

“Probably tomorrow, she’s bringing down the rest of our stuff from our rooms there,” Mira answered.

Eddie breathed out, he was about meet the Guild Master of The Wanderers very, very soon.