"AARGH!" I screamed as a couple of lumps squirmed across my belly and then bulged outwards, tearing with a disgusting squelch and squirting blood a short distance into the air. A couple of centipedes poked their heads out of the holes. After hesitating a brief moment, they forced their way out into the open air and crawled off my prone body, only ten centimetres long and their shells covered in gore.

The first time hadn't been this bad. I'd had a really bad tummy-ache one moment, coughed up a few mouthfuls of blood and then woke up in my respawn cave the next. I hadn't even levelled pain resistance.

Pain resistance advanced to level 15

This time I had. The reason for the difference was fairly obvious; last time I'd returned to the murder tree's room where I was conducting this training to find my corpse a complete mess and a hundred tiny centipedes all dead in the pool. This time there were only two. The two disease resistance levels I'd picked up last time and the extra one earlier today were obviously tipping me over the point at which these things could survive.

I watched my two monstrous babies raise their heads off the floor and move them around a bit as if they were sniffing, then charge straight into the pool. Apparently my babies take after me; all completely suicidal. I crawled after them and followed them in; despite not suffering an immediate death, my intestines were torn to shreds, and there was no way I'd be living much longer. The nectar took away everything that was left over after pain resistance, sending me back to my respawn cave once more.

Given the number of the things that had ended up in the pool during their invasion, I was rather glad it could dissolve even the chitin after enough time, or the pool would probably be full by now. My bones, too; there weren't as many left in there as all my deaths would suggest.

Adding yet another layer of irony to the brood-mother's negotiation was that I'd gone through with the terms of the deal even after its death. I'd taken the mana crystal, and acted as host for as long as my disease resistance allowed. Admittedly, that was only one full batch, and the babies had all died within minutes afterwards, but their survival was never part of the deal.

That was enough for now. I'd gained three levels each of my disease and poison resistances, as well as that single level of pain. I'd reached my limit as to what the poison would give me, having repeatedly paralysed myself with it while waiting for the eggs to hatch. Perhaps I could scrape another level of disease resistance, but that harrowing experience had put me off, and it was already my highest level skill anyway. How did that leave my current status?

Name: Katie

Primary class: Princess of undying laughter (level 2)

- Class skills -

Trigger respawn

Item box

Mapping

{Locked}

{Locked}

{Locked}

- Combat skills -

Unarmed dabbler: Level 5

Novice dodger: Level 10

Spear proficiency: Level 15

Novice blocker: Level 9

Dagger proficiency: Level 15

- Resistance skills -

Friend of fear

Pain resistance: Level 15

Poison resistance: Level 14

Corrosion resistance: Level 10

Disease resistance: Level 16

Mind magic tolerance: Level 3

Heat tolerance: Level 1

- Crafting skills -

Improvisational artisan: Level 11

Artistry: Level 4

- Scouting skills -

Novice stealth: Level 6

Sense presence: Level 2

- Magic skills -

Sense mana: Level 1

Not bad. I had one level of blocking to pick up before I maxed it, so after cleaning up the mess I'd just made in the room of my favourite pet tree, I headed out to kill the remaining centipedes I could find in the large cavern.

Novice blocker advanced to level 10

It was a shame I didn't have evolutions for either of my defensive skills. While I could stab a big, achievement-worthy monster by catching it off guard, I couldn't really defend against one in the same way. Having an attack to defend against kinda required them to have seen me already.

...I suppose there's one thing I could try. And if it failed, I'd still get another level of heat tolerance from it.

I grabbed an extra large plate of shell from the brood-mother, swapped out my armour for my nightie, and wandered down the dragon's passage. It once again opened a single slitted eye and stared at me.

"Hi?" I tried. "Can you und..."

When I saw the overly toothy mouth start to open, I had just enough time to pull the massive chunk of shell out in front of me before the world turned red. Flame flowed past me on both sides, as well as over my head, the radiated heat searing my skin. The shell grew hotter and hotter, until even the rear side of my shield started glowing red, and smoke curled off me where I was holding it to keep it upright.

Heat tolerance advanced to level 2

Heat tolerance advanced to level 3

The lance of flame lasted for less than ten seconds, but it felt like hours. Once it was over, I couldn't even release the shield, the heat having welded it to my hands. My skin was blackened, charred and cracked, and streams of boiling rock were pouring past on either side of me.

The whole room started shaking, and for a moment I thought the dungeon was experiencing an earthquake. Then the chunk of shell I was using as a shield toppled over forward, with a series of snaps and cracks as it pulled chunks of my carbonised hands away with it, and behind it I saw that the dragon was now wide awake, standing upright and laughing. It didn't even say anything, simply continuing its earth-shaking chuckle.

"..." I said. I'd been intending to make a witty comeback, but apparently a few seconds of inhaling vaporised rock makes speaking kinda hard. Breathing, too. "..." I added as I collapsed to the floor.

Evolution conditions met: Novice blocker ranks up to proficient blocker

When something wants to kill you, it's often advisable to keep something large and sturdy between you and it. A wall might be preferable, but sometimes effectiveness must give way to practicality. Then again, even the thickest of walls would have been unlikely to protect you from the breath of a draco rubrum, yet somehow your shield did, earning you an upgrade from novice to proficient. This skill will aid you in the use of shields and increase the protection they offer.

"Totally worth it," I said to myself, back in the comfort of my own cave. How hard would it have been to collect these achievements without my respawn cheat? How many of these messages had talked about how I'd 'survived' something or other, when in reality I'd done nothing of the sort? It was just a shame I couldn't repeat that stunt with dodging.

I was almost tempted to repeat it anyway, and see if the 'increase the protection they offer' bit tacked onto the end of the skill description would be enough for me to actually survive, but I had a feeling that excessively pissing off a dragon wouldn't be a great career move. That time it had just laughed at me, but I'd been given the impression that I really didn't want it to start taking me seriously.

Instead, I explored the final level passage, filling in the last unexplored area of this floor. It simply led to yet another large, featureless cavern, very much like the one in the centipede's territory, except that this one had some light. There were centipedes there, but nothing else still living, the centipedes apparently having wiped everything else out. I did find a couple of horned beetle corpses, and took their horns as extra spares, wrapping some of my dwindling silk supplies around the base to make grips. Another spiked shield would have been nice, but I didn't think the horns were well enough attached to be viable. It would probably break on first use again.

What I didn't find was another mana crystal, or anything at all that reacted to sense mana. Maybe the dragon would have one, but I doubt I'd have had any luck getting it even if it did.

With the floor fully explored, it was time to complete the side quest. I returned to the shrine, pulled out the mana crystal, and... now what? It wasn't as if there was an 'offer mana crystal' button anywhere. I placed it on the statue and took a few steps back, but nothing happened.

"Well, are you going to take it or not?" I asked it, getting about as much response as I expected. That is to say, none at all. Why was it that of the two creatures I'd met so far that could actually understand me, one deems me a pest to kill on sight, and the other tried to brainwash me into being friendly, and when that failed, brainwashed me into thinking I was part of its brood?

...Actually, when I think of it like that, maybe the big centipede was just lonely. None of its spawn could talk to it, after all. Did I do a bad thing?

"Look, you're going to have to take it soon," I said. "I'm starting to second guess if you're the good gal here."

A few minutes of experimentation later, and the trick turned out to be that I needed to hold the crystal against the statue and think very hard about offering it. The crystal vanished in a blinding flash, and by the time my eyes recovered, the cracks in the statue had vanished and the eroded, featureless sculpture had sharpened into something far more detailed. The room was brighter, the walls whiter, with any eroded brickwork repaired, and all remnant cobwebs had vanished.

Side quest complete: Make an offering to the weakened shrine

For making an offering worth more than 500 mana, additional reward granted: You have gained one class level.

New respawn point activated

Okay then. Guess I didn't need to worry about the size of that mana crystal. And a new respawn point? Does that mean I could respawn here on death, or that I always would? No, feeling it out, it was as if I had a new skill along the lines of trigger respawn, that let me select my current respawn point. I could pick here or my original cave. Nice; if the shrine restoration flooded my cave with monsters, I still had a safe location. It would be harder to get back to my pet murder tree, though. Getting killed in the cavern while trying to reach it would kind of defeat the point of trying to reach it.

Once again, a new level meant a new skill. Time to get appraisal!

Faster respawn: Cut respawn time by 85%.

Magic focus: Gain magic skills more easily, and level them faster. Counts as an achievement for the purpose of evolving all tier 1 magic skills.

Combat focus: Gain combat skills more easily, and level them faster. Counts as an achievement for the purpose of evolving all tier 1 combat skills.

Scouting focus: Gain scouting skills more easily, and level them faster. Counts as an achievement for the purpose of evolving all tier 1 scouting skills.

Appraisal: View the name and limited information of a target.

Healing rest: A good night's sleep completely restores health, stamina and mana.

Register spawn location: Mark an additional location as an alternate respawn point. Custom respawn point can be reset once every seven days.

Stable equipment: Damage to equipment is dispersed across the whole and repairs can be conducted by merger with construction materials.

Another two new ones, and once again, everything had been upgraded. Of the two new ones, one would let me add a third respawn point, and I could move it around once a week, assuming a day here was the same length as Earth. Interesting, but not something I had an immediate use for. I'd have been more interested if I hadn't already gained a second spawn point only a minute ago.

The last skill would be more valuable. Instead of things cutting holes in my armour, it would... I wasn't sure. In many games, equipment has a flat durability stat, so it must implement that in some way. It was interesting, but my limitation on making repairs was materials, particularly silk, and this didn't do away with the need for it. It was a shame there wasn't a more fleshy version of it though; the players also tended to have a single health stat, and didn't need to worry about missing limbs and stuff. I stuck with my original plan and picked up appraisal, immediately pointing it at the statue.

Shrine to the Goddess

Yeah, that didn't tell me much. What about my equipment?

Coleoptera corniger horn spear

The horn of a coleoptera corniger, the base modified to provide a usable grip.

Attack rating: 12

Aranea volito claw dagger

A claw from an aranea volito, the base modified to provide a usable grip.

Attack rating: 11

Improvised chilopoda sagacitas armour

Improvised armour produced from the shells of a chilopoda sagacitas and its spawn, also integrating the binding fluid of the chilopoda sagacitas and silk from a nest of aranea volito. While this armour provides excellent protection of vital points, overall defence is lessened by the incorporation of weaker materials.

Defence rating: 34

Illuminating chilopoda sagacitas shield

While nothing more than a cut section of chilopoda sagacitas shell with grips added to the back and bryopsida illuminans attached to the front, this shield provides excellent protection. The bryopsida illuminans permits this shield to be used as a limited light source.

Defence rating: 50

That told me the official names of a few more things, and that my equipment had quantised attack and defence ratings. Hmm... Did that include the improvement from improvisational artisan? I took out one of my new spears to check.

Coleoptera corniger horn spear

The horn of a coleoptera corniger, the base modified to provide a usable grip.

Attack rating: 13

Right, so I was doing this backwards. I needed to use the new spears first, and the old as backup. But even so, the disparity between my weapons and armour was huge, even with the penalty to my armour from using the spider silk as my only available flexible material.

The higher level stuff had better descriptions too, but that was possibly because my weapons didn't really have anything to describe. They were just monster bits with a bit of silk wrapped around them. What about the trinkets I'd picked up from the centipede lair?

Cursed ring of gender reversal

This powerful magical item inverts the gender of the wearer. This item is cursed and is irremovable once worn.

Cursed ring of gender reversal

This powerful magical item inverts the gender of the wearer. This item is cursed and is irremovable once worn.

A pair of rings of gender reversal... Why?! What the hell, adventure? Thank goodness I hadn't tried wearing one. Although, I had to admit that the existence of such ridiculous items raised some interesting questions. If I had worn one, could I have undone the effect by wearing the second? What if I identified as gender neutral? Would the ring have no effect? I would just have to live without knowing the answers, because I sure as hell wasn't testing them.

Steel longsword of paralysis

This high-quality steel longsword has been enchanted with a paralysis effect. Successive attacks will progressively weaken the target, eventually leading to muscle failure.

Attack rating: 30

That was more like it! The rating was still lower than my handmade armour, but at least it wasn't cursed. The effect described by the enchantment sounded very similar to the centipede's poison. I was interested how they'd obtained these items, but given that I'd killed the only one likely to know, I'd probably never find out. Maybe they were created here as part of the adventure setup.

In any case, with the quest turned in, I had another important job to do. I needed to explore the first floor of this dungeon for a second time, and find out what had changed.