We had to land the van. There wasn’t a much better choice, we’d fucked up our legendary escape, and here we were.

Luckily Sal and Selene seemed to be safe and unharmed, besides some bruising and rude awakenings from their lollipop induced drug-trip.

“Hello, hello! And good morning to you both!” The Candyman said, his face plastered with an uncomfortably large grin.

When he said morning, I think he meant four in the morning, since it was still well dark due to our February clock settings.

“Now, if you wouldn’t mind coming inside and giving us some of your time, it’d be lovely.” he continued, it wasn’t really like we had a choice regardless. I mean, how bad could this ‘Vampire Cult’ I’d made such a big deal out of really be. “And we have beds ready for you.” Oh, free beds? Nice. Alright, I guess he can bring me into the basement if he wanted, as long as I can get some sleep.

So we exited the vehicle, and hopped out on the gravel. The snow had been cleared out of the way of all the roadways leading here and all the pathways around the mansion.

Speaking of, yes, we were facing a luxurious French styled mansion. The gardens and everything exterior were completely snowed over, other than some clean pathways, so it seemed as if the mansion sat in this valley all alone.

The building itself was expertly crafted, with lots of rounded shapes and swirls used in the design, and a lovely tiled roof. None of the lights were on, but I could guess it’d look absolutely picturesque with the lights on and the snow covered hills glimmering in the backdrop.

Turns out, though, this valley also housed the town, further away, around a mile off. The mansion didn’t necessarily overlook it, but it was a faint glimmer in the darkness, far away.

“Welcome to Le Tribunal des Voleurs.” LeCroux told us.

“The Thieves' Court?!” I exclaimed, unsure if he was pulling my leg. This vilified place was something of a mystery. Nobody it’s true location, and everyone suspected France, but apparently, it was here in good ol’ Canada.

“The very same place, little Marionette. Your hostess has graciously asked for your attendance.” I hated how he called me little, like some kind of pervert.

“Tell her if she ever kidnaps me again, she’ll attend her own funeral.”

“You can tell her yourself, you’ll be meeting her in the morning.”

“Oh, goodie.” I sarcasmed.

“So, you are telling me that you don’t even know what is going on, Roland?” Twee sneered at her friend, confronting him. I knew I shouldn’t get too much closer, but I couldn’t help but listen in.

“I… am friends with these people. I’m a recruit. But… I had no idea about the kidnapping part. I didn’t even think they’d show up.” Star Breaker tried to explain.

“That story better match with the one our hostess tells us.”

I walked over to Selene, who was just lying on the ground, rubbing her head.

“Sorry I dropped you out of a van. We’re gonna stay with these people, they actually aren’t evil, and just have strange invite customs.”

“I heard everything. You know I was awake, right?”

“What?”

“Yeah, who even sleeps in that position with their legs in the air?”

I decided not to hurt her feelings and tell her the truth. It’d be a funny realization later when she finally figured it out for herself.

“You wanna lay there, or would you prefer a bed inside?” I asked her, looking at her extremely dirty outfit from everything we’ve been through thus far.

“Yeah… I guess.” she grumbled, getting up.

And then I noticed it.

Against all odds, Sal still slept like a headless chicken through all of that.

Of course I’d wake him up.

“Wakey wakey, fire boy!” I snickered, trying to tickle his neck.

“Fuck off, I’m already awake.” he growled sleepily.

“Suuuure.”

That was basically our relationship in like three lines of dialogue.

“We have to be really quiet when we head in there.” LeCroux said seriously for once, ushering us over to the door after getting our shit together.

I nodded and he began to unlock the door. The key was unlike any normal key I’d seen, it seemed to be some sort of item you’d find in a chest in some medieval fantasy RPG. It was made of copper or brass, some sort of brown metal, and it had a yellow shiny gem encrusted upon the little loop at the top of the key.

We all stayed perfectly quiet as the door opened. We were in a small foyer where you’d take off your shoes and leave them in many numbered boxes. I saw the walls with many different types of shoes, all for different types of feet. Perhaps we weren’t the only guests sleeping here tonight. There were also various coat racks for jackets to hang upon. This didn’t seem like the safest way to avoid getting your stuff stolen, but I had to just go with it.

LeCroux pointed to a row at the top and I got the message. I was a shoeless household guy myself, so we were already off to a good start with whoever runs this joint.

After the team removed their shoes and their jackets, we opened another door and entered the mansion proper.

It was quite warm in here, obviously there was some sort of air conditioning or insulation. My body felt happy to be covered in such preferable temperatures as opposed to the crap I’d been walking through all day.

We climbed a flight of dark oak stairs that led up to an indoor balcony overlooking the plush entrance hall. I couldn’t see much in the dark, but I followed the others as closely as I could.

Upon reaching the top floor, I noticed there was a third story, coupled by a third flight of stairs. We simply ignored it, though.

Instead, The Candyman led the five of us over to a singular room at the end of the hall marked ‘Servant Quarters’. I was instantly very suspicious, a feeling I should have had while agreeing to follow a child kidnapper into a creepy mansion at 4AM.

I was reluctant, but I knew we had nowhere else to go, so I opened the door and steeled myself.

Inside, there were in fact, no slaves or servants to speak of. It was just some beds in a room with a single window. The room wasn’t much, and it felt like a slightly bigger college dorm, but the beds did look at least a little inviting, compared to the floor of a moving van.

Okay, upon contact with my body though, the beds were actually pretty bad, but it didn’t really matter, I’d sleep on anything tonight to be honest.

“Sweet dreams. Sleep as long as you’d like.” LeCroux told us in whisper, and I had a feeling that was complete bullshit.