"Excuse me, what are you doing?" an unfamiliar voice asked.

"Shits, guards!" Tex whispered when a flashlight beam hit the ground a few feet from them.

Although his first instinct was to run, two night guards with batons at their hips had already popped into view and started to box the two of them in by the time Tex had gotten Junji off his shoulders.

Tex dusted himself off and did his best not to panic.

"Were you aware that vandalizing private property is a crime?" the taller guard asked.

"...Yeah." Tex replied.

“And I’m assuming you’re aware that Harvard buildings are private property?”

“...Yeah.”

"Can I get your names, please?"

Tex exchanged a quick glance with Junji before responding.

"Uh, Austin." said Tex. "Austin Crain."

"Michiko Sakurai." Junji answered. "You would have known this had you examined my art piece."

"And can I see some IDs?" the guard pushed.

Tex motioned ever-so-slightly for Junji to prepare himself. Junji didn't flinch, but he did make a tiny shift in his stance.

"Ah, well." Tex started. "I keep my ID in my car for if I ever get pulled over, but if you just let me--"

Tex turned on a dime and took off running. He didn't need to look behind him to see that Junji had broken into a sprint as well, with the two of them headed for the street.

"Hey!" one of the guards shouted.

Tex turned slightly to the right so he could lead them to the sidewalk of the dark street. He picked up the pace once they arrived, his feet slapping against the pavement with full force as he mustered up all the speed he had.

"Do you think we might--have overreacted?" Junji panted.

"Nah." Tex replied.

The two of them managed to put a whole block between them and the guards in less than a minute. Still, Tex knew they only had so much time before the cops were called.

They turned a corner. Tex's toes were already getting pinched by his loafers, and he made a note to start wearing running shoes everywhere like Junji did.

"Hop the fence." Tex instructed when they came to a golf course.

Junji nodded and scurried up the fence, landing perfectly on his feet. Tex did the same, although Junji had to help steady him to keep him from planting face first into a sand dune.

The golf course was dark and quiet. Trees and other plant life lined the edges.

"In the bush." Junji ordered, pointing at a large clump of thick green bushes next to the sand dune.

"Good idea."

Junji climbed into the bush first, his body disappearing silently into the branches. Tex did the same, although he grunted when a branch pegged him in the cheek.

The only thing Tex could hear once they'd situated themselves was his own panting.

"Dallas." Junji stated.

"Hey, keep it down."

"Dallas, did you see my strongly pointed comic?"

Through a curtain of leaves, Tex shot a glance in every direction to see if anyone had followed them.

"Uhuh." he replied.

"Dallas, did you see the way I was wrongfully oppressed in my comic?"

"Sure did, pardner."

There was no sign of anyone coming after them, but Tex still thought it best to wait a full two hours before leaving the bush. They passed the time by silently playing connect four with a pen and a napkin.

"Best out of seven?" Junji asked once they'd each won three rounds.

"...Let's just go home."

The two of them crawled out of the bush. Upon un-hunching his back for the first time in hours, Tex winced in pain.

"We're too old to be doing this." Tex said as they hopped back over the fence.

"Yes, we could have been tasered."

Considering they'd had to take the train all the way to Massachusetts, the two of them ended up a good twenty minutes late to Bianca's meeting. Tex gave one last failed attempt to clean the sap from his palms as they stepped up to the building.

"Have you told the others about my return?" Junji wondered.

"Yeah, I texted everybody last night."

The inside of Bianca's office had been dolled up since the last time Tex had seen it. Colorful streamers lined the wall, and there was a stack of presents on the wine and cheese table.

Everyone was crowded in a little circle around Luke and Caverly. Bianca and Sean both turned away upon noticing Junji.

"Junji!" Bianca said as the two of them rushed towards him. "Hi!"

"Hello." Junji replied.

"Hey, Junji." Sean greeted. "Tex told us you finally got over your scurvy."

Tex pretended not to notice when Junji shot a look in his direction. Tala walked over and settled next to Tex.

"Yes." Junji stated flatly. "Are you having a party?"

"Yeah, it's for you." answered Tala.

Luke and Caverly came over to greet Junji next. Junji widened his eyes upon Caverly's arrival.

"Junji." Caverly said with a smile. "It's good to see you."

"You are pregnant." Junji replied.

"Yeah."

"I lied when I said the party was for you." Tala explained.

Junji coughed.

"I remember now that you two had conceived prior to my--scurvy." said Junji.

"She's actually due in just a couple hours." Luke replied, jabbing his thumb at the pile of presents.

Bianca produced a noise of excitement. Tex felt himself frown. He was happy for Caverly, but his inability to make people inside him left him a bit envious.

"Are you going to name it anything?" Bianca asked.

"Nah." Caverly replied.

Luke cleared his throat.

"Cav's parents want the name Emily, after her grandmother." answered Luke.

"What if it's a boy?" Bianca pushed.

"I dunno, like Ted or Xavier or something.”

Tala scoffed loudly enough to bring everyone’s attention to her.

"Um, what if it's gender neutral?" Tala asked.

"We'll get there when we get there." Caverly replied.

"Not good enough. Here's a list of some actually appropriate names."

Tala flashed Caverly a list of gender neutral names on her phone screen. Tex gave the list a quick read over Caverly's shoulder.

Spoob Killary Clinton

"Thanks." Caverly stated.

"Speaking of names." said Sean. "I think I want my name to be spelled Shawn from now on."

"What about circumcision?" Bianca wondered. "Have you guys decided on circumcision?"

"We don't really see a point." Luke replied.

"Circumcision." Junji muttered angrily. "God's answer to the question 'How can we waste both time and foreskin?'"

Tex felt a rush of endearment towards Junji, although his face didn't move.

"Do you mind advice?" asked Bianca. "On parenting, I mean."

"At worst I'll find it entertaining." Caverly answered.

"You should be careful. Kids get smarter at an exponential rate."

"That's true." Tala replied. "I got smarter at a rate of forty arctan of one fortieth 'x' intelligence units per month until I was a teenager. I'm sure everyone else was the same."

"Remember, we're only going to raise them for the first two years." Luke said. "Then Cav's parents are getting her."

Junji frowned and reached into his pocket. After pulling out his phone and a slip of paper, he began to scribble frantically.

"Where's this going?" Caverly asked when Junji opened the calculator app.

"Yes...just..." Junji replied. "Ah, here."

Junji turned the paper around so they all could see.

f(x)=intelligence units

x=months since birth

[0

f(x)=40arctan(x/40)

f'(x)=1/[(x^2 /1600)+1]

f'(x)=1600/(x^2 +1600)

f'(24)=1600/(24^2 +1600)

f'(24)=.7353

"Even at just age two, your child will be advancing at a rate of nearly three fourths of an intelligence unit per month assuming they are genetically identical to Tala." Junji explained.

Tex eyed Junji's math, unable to wrap his head around it but impressed nonetheless.

"What hospital are you going to?" Tala wondered.

"Just over at Swedish." Caverly replied.

"Swedish? Where they do the weird tub births?"

Bianca shook her head no.

"You should get an epidural." she said as she handed Caverly a pair of hand-stitched Neon Genesis Evangelion baby shoes. "My mom got one and she said it was the most rewarding part of having a child."

"My mama didn't need no epidural." Tex boasted. "She gave birth to me all by herself in the car when it broke down, and then she changed the oil."

"Hey Tex, how long were you breastfed?" asked Tala.

"Unimportant."

"Oh, I'm not going to do an epidural." Caverly replied. "I want to have a natural birth."

The tiny hairs on the back of Tex's neck stood up when the air next to him turned cold. He turned to see Junji, all of the color gone from his face.

"An epidural significantly decreases the amount of pain felt during childbirth." Junji said slowly.

"...Uhuh." Caverly replied.

"You will be increasing the amount of pain you feel if you refuse painkiller."

"Yeah, that's the idea."

Junji's face set itself in stone.

"Why are you doing this?" asked Junji.

"My mother did it." Caverly answered. "It seems more interesting."

"Is there any way I could convince you to use painkiller?"

Caverly let out an amused chuckle.

"Junji, it'll be fine." she said. "Don't worry."

"Junji just hates babies cause they don't pay taxes." Tex replied.

Both Bianca and Caverly laughed. Junji’s expression was unflinching.

"I must go." Junji said as he turned on his heels. "I have business to attend to."

Tex watched in confusion as Junji shot towards the door like someone had hit him on the butt. Tex could feel Bianca's and Caverly's questioning eyes on him, but he didn't have any answers to give them.

"Is he alright?" Bianca asked.

"He'll be fine." Tex replied.

"Do you think we should check on him?"

"I will. He can't get home without my key."

Although Tex's explanation probably shouldn't have made sense to her considering she didn't know about the fridge portal, Bianca nodded and didn't ask any more questions.

Junji didn't come back for the remainder of the meeting. Tex passed the time by chatting with Caverly about how much she hated being an insurance representative until Tala began to stare at him.

"Gimme a minute, let me just see what she wants." Tex told Caverly.

"That's alright." Caverly replied. "I should get going, anyway."

Caverly turned towards Luke and waved him over, forcing him to end his heated debate with Shawn over if baby switching was immoral or not.

"Oh, so you're saying all people aren't created equal?" Shawn asked, mockingly so. "Consider--"

"I gotta go." Luke interrupted.

Luke bid Shawn farewell and the two of them took off for the door. Tala walked over to Tex the second they'd left.

"Howdy." Tex greeted.

“Hey.” Tala replied. "Something just came up in Korea."

Tex yawned and stretched his arms over his head. He stopped and winced when he realized his back still hurt.

“Alright, let’s have a meeting soon.” he said.

“Yeah, I just wanted to give you a warning.”

Tala left without giving Tex any more information. Tex figured it was time to leave himself.

Tex walked back to his apartment to find Junji standing outside his door with a phone pressed against his ear. After waving hello, Tex grabbed the key from his pocket and let them both inside.

"...and call me back when you're in position." Junji said into his phone. "I should be there in forty-five minutes."

Junji hung up the phone and put it back in one of his many pockets. Upon entering Tex's apartment, he stopped next to the coat rack.

"Thank you for coming for me." Junji stated. "I wanted to grab a jacket before I head out."

"You going somewhere?" asked Tex.

"Nowhere interesting."

Junji reached for the jacket he'd left a few days prior and tied it around his waist.

"You need help?" Tex pushed.

"I'll be fine."

After cracking a smile, Tex scoffed in mock offense and leaned against the door.

"Something I wouldn't approve of?" he asked.

Junji’s eyebrows came together in uncertainty.

"I'm not sure." Junji replied.

"What is it?"

"In short, I've used my grey market ties with the hospital Caverly has been taken to. The team of doctors watching over her have been replaced with several well-trained black market surgeons who will 'accidentally' administer painkiller before asking."

Tex had to replay Junji's words over in his head about three times before he was certain he understood. When he did, he heard himself cough.

"That's insane." Tex managed.

"What's insane is wanting to experience the pain of getting repeatedly stabbed in the stomach with no function."

"You can't do this. It's psychotic."

Junji frowned.

"I thought you would support my decision." he stated.

"Why would you think that?"

"I don’t know. I will do it without you."

Junji's expression fell even further, although Tex only got a quick look at it before Junji turned and began to make his way to the door.

"If you do this," Tex started, "I'll stop you."

Junji's pace came to a halt. After a moment of consideration, he shot Tex a look over his shoulder.

"Very well." Junji replied.

"Huh?"

"Very well. Tell me how you would stop me."

Tex stared at Junji. Junji stared back. Absentmindedly, Tex reached into his pocket and pulled out a mint.

"I'd tell the hospital ahead of time what you were planning." Tex answered as he popped the mint into his mouth.

"I've already taken over the hospital."

"I could tell Caverly."

"Caverly is already in her room. What do you do?"

Junji's expression was unrelenting. Tex shrugged internally and weighed his options.

"I'll go to the hospital." said Tex.

"You go to the hospital. By the time you arrive, Caverly will be starting labor in thirty minutes."

"Fine."

"You are greeted by a front desk receptionist. She eyes you as you walk up."

"What do she say?"

Junji cleared his throat. When he began to speak again, he did so in a terrible American accent.

"Can I help you, honey?" he asked.

"I gotta see Caverly Privatbesitz. It's an emergency."

Junji pushed an invisible pair of glasses down his nose and shot Tex an expression of disbelief over the lenses.

"Listen, kid." Junji replied. "I got a busy schedule. I'm not here to help you with whatever sitcom shenanigans you think you're getting up to."

Desperate, Tex pulled a pen and paper out of his pocket and wrote a quick list of every ability he had.

"Move along." followed Junji.

Tex looked down at the paper to see all that the only things he'd written were seduce and pocket sand.

"Uh. You sure there ain't nothing I could do for a lady, such as yourself?" Tex asked.

Both of Junji's eyebrows flicked up in a perfect, single movement.

"I won't cause a fuss." Tex added.

"You would screw me, just so you can talk to somebody?"

"Well, let's not pretend I wouldn't be getting anything out of it."

Amused consideration passed over Junji's face.

"Alright, fine." said Junji. "Meet me in the closet down the hall."

"Down to the right?"

"It's two lefts, then a straight, then a right, and then it's kitty corner from the bathroom."

"Gotcha."

Junji said nothing. Tex turned the mint over in his mouth.

"Do you remember the directions?" Junji asked in his normal voice.

"No." Tex replied.

"The receptionist takes off. You follow after her and find the bathroom after being redirected by nurses two separate times."

"Thank you."

"You copulate with the receptionist in the supply closet kitty corner from the bathroom. You are allowed access to the ward Caverly has been sent to with eighteen minutes remaining."

"Can I search the supply closet before I leave?"

"Very well. You find a box of gloves, a needle-administered sedative, and a rack of sperm containers."

Tex grit his teeth as he fought back the sudden and bizarre intrusive idea to replace the semen in one of the cups with his own.

"I leave the closet and make my way to the ward." Tex said.

"You arrive at the ward. An Italian man dressed as a doctor stands next to Caverly's room. His attention drifts to you as you walk up, and you notice that he's carrying a concealed handgun."

Tex bit the mint in his mouth in half as he planned his next move.

"Are you going to seduce him as well?" asked Junji.

"I can't seduce him."

"He is noticeably aroused by your presence. You could seduce him easily."

Tex was unable to respond.

"Ay Fabio, you going somewhere? Or did you just wanna stand around so I can look at you?" Junji asked in a terrible accent but near perfect body language.

Tex rubbed the back of his head.

"What is it about me that he finds so handsome?" he wondered.

"Is this what you wish to say to him?"

"No, I'll...tell him I was hoping to go somewhere he could look at me a little closer."

"I'm sure I could sneak in a little something something before the Jap notices I'm gone. Why don't you meet me in the supply closet in five, we'll make it real quick."

Tex said nothing. Junji only stared.

"Did it work?" Tex asked once a few seconds had passed.

"Yes. You've fornicated with the guard inside the supply closet."

"How much time do I got left?"

"Two and a half minutes."

Tex scoffed in disbelief.

"Two and a half?" he asked. "How long did it take him?"

"He is Italian," Junji replied while his eyelid twitched, "so he is physically incapable of being anything less than twelve minutes late. The sex itself was ninety seconds you will never get back."

Finished with the mint, Tex chewed on his lower lip in thought.

"I'll leave the supply closet and return to the ward." Tex decided.

"You return to the ward. The guard is back at his post."

Tex felt his eyebrows scrunch together in outrage.

"What?" he asked. "But I screwed him."

"Yes. What is your point?"

Tex scratched his chin. He'd always assumed that people just passed out after they'd been seduced.

"Guess there's no other option." said Tex. "I approach him, then I combo the pocket sand and the tranquilizer."

"Your pocket sand successfully stuns the guard. You puncture his skin with the needle and administer the sedative."

Tex frowned.

"He don't look too hurt, do he?" he asked.

"He looks extremely hurt. The last sound he makes before he loses consciousness is a cry of deep betrayal."

Although he was emotionally wounded, Tex did his best to keep his head in the game.

"How much time do I got left now?" Tex wondered.

"You had two minutes when you attacked the guard. The sedative would likely take ninety-three seconds to kick in, so..."

"Twenty-seven seconds left."

Junji counted silently for a moment before looking impressed.

"You enter the room with twenty-seven seconds remaining." said Junji. "Caverly is laying down in a bed, but you can barely see her through the pair of mafioso nurses."

As he spoke, Junji shifted his body language into something more American.

"What are you doing here?" Junji asked.

Tex put his hands up and took a few steps forward until he was in range of the imaginary mobsters.

"Ah, well." Tex started. "Just let me explain how--"

Tex jumped forwards.

"Then I lunge between them and snap the epidural needle in half and tattle on you to Caverly." he finished.

Junji's expression intensified, but he didn't back down.

"They could get another needle." Junji said.

"And Caverly could get her gun."

There was a moment where neither of them spoke, with the two of them just staring at each other. The silence let Tex finally notice just how hard his heart was pounding in his chest.

Junji turned and tried to run. Tex only lunged forward and grabbed him in time because he was expecting it.

"No!" Junji yelped as he struggled. "Please."

Tex grit his teeth and did his best to keep Junji at bay. It was easier than he was expecting, as Junji was surprisingly uncoordinated.

"Junji, you can't do this." he replied. "It's her choice."

"It's a bad choice."

"Maybe it ain't. Maybe Caverly'll be disappointed for the whole rest of her life if she doesn't get to do it."

Slowly, Junji stopped trying to struggle.

"It'll be alright, I promise." said Tex.

"...Yes, you are right." Junji replied as he sunk to the ground.

Tex let go of Junji's body, unable to support his dead weight any longer. Upon reaching the floor, Junji opened the cabinet under the sink and crawled inside.

He closed the door behind him. Some shuffling was heard.

"Vinny, call the operation off." Junji muttered after a minute and a few beeps from his phone. "Don't slip your patient any painkiller."

"Ay, what gives, boss?" a voice replied.

"Don't worry, you horny degenerate, you will still be paid."

"Hey, you can't call me a--"

Through the cabinet door, Junji's phone beeped to indicate he'd ended the call.

Tex raised an eyebrow in confusion and knelt down next to the sink. After a moment of consideration, he knocked his fist against the wood of the cabinet.

There was no response.

"You alright there, pardner?" Tex asked.

"...I am upset."

"You want me to come in?"

"There's no room."

Junji made a good point.

"Thought you would've accepted it, when you changed your mind." Tex pushed.

"I'm unpleasantly enraged that she is doing this to herself. I now know there is no reason for me to be enraged, but this only makes me more enraged that I'm enraged."

"Sounds like a vicious cycle."

Junji didn't reply. Tex frowned to himself, puzzled by Junji's behavior but concerned nonetheless.

"...What if we did something real fun?" asked Tex.

It took Junji a moment to respond. Tex opened the cabinet door to see that Junji was curled up in a ball behind the sink. He was trembling slightly, although Tex couldn't see his face.

"What do you mean?" Junji replied.

"If we do something fun enough, maybe it'll cancel out what Caverly’ll go through."

Junji perked up so quickly it was almost funny.

"That is a--ow." Junji started, cutting himself off when he hit his head against the top of the cabinet. "You wish for us to engage in an intensely pleasurable activity?"

"Sure."

After untangling his foot from a bottle of Drano, Junji slithered out of the cabinet and onto the floor.

"Did you have an activity in mind?" Junji asked.

"...Not really."

"I believe I have an idea."

Tex managed not to flush, although it took concentration.

"Look I--I know what you're gonna suggest." he stammered. "But I just can't..."

"Can't what?" Junji replied as he pulled a needle of heroin out of his pocket.

"Whoa! We can't do that!"

"Why not?"

"Cause then I'll wanna do it again."

Junji touched the back of his neck, right over where Tex knew the memory plate to be.

"What if we didn't remember?" asked Junji.

Tex wasn't sure just exactly what they'd signed themselves up for when they packed up the heroin and used the fridge portal to get to Junji's island.

The air was hot. Tex sat down on a rock next to Junji on the shoreline.

"Why do you even have heroin, anyway?" Tex wondered.

"For the fish."

"...Huh?"

Junji didn't answer, apparently tired of stalling. Tex watched in morbid curiosity as Junji bent his arm and stuck the needle into his own vein.

"Would you like assistance?" Junji muttered once he'd pulled the needle out.

"Please."

After Junji grabbed the other needle, Tex looked away and gave Junji his arm. He felt Sister Marta's ghost glaring down at him as Junji pushed the plunger, but he got over it.

"What do we do now?" asked Junji.

"We wait."

It didn’t take long for the heroin to kick in. Tex found himself standing calf-deep in the ocean with little recollection as to when he'd even taken his shoes off.

Junji's island was a beautiful thing. Tex had always liked looking out over the coastline, especially when the coast was decorated with white sand and a sunrise that turned the teal water purple and orange. It was like something out of a postcard, really, except with the added benefit of sand fleas.

"By yon bonnie banks and by yon bonnie braes." Tex sang as the waves crashed over his feet. "Where the sun shines bright on Loch Lomond."

About ten feet before him, Junji stood hunched over with his hands tensed over the surface of the water.

"Where we two have passed so many blithesome days. On the bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomond."

Junji shoved both his hands into the ocean. When he removed them, he was holding a thrashing, colorful fish.

"Okurimono." Junji said as he used the needle to give the fish a tiny dose of heroin. He kept the fish in his hands, although he held it under the water so it could breathe.

"And you'll take the high road and I'll take the low road. And I'll be in Scotland afore ye."

Junji took the fish back out of the water. In one of the quickest movements Tex had ever seen, Junji brought his knife through the fish's head, killing it instantly.

"Where me and my true love will never meet again. On the bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomond."

"That is a Scottish song." Junji said as he took a bite from the fish's side.

"And that's disgusting."

"I thought your family was Irish."

"They were."

"Do you know any Irish songs?"

Tex bit his lip and chuckled in anticipation.

"My dad used to sing Come Out Ye Black and Tans, sometimes." Tex answered. “Oh come out ye black and tans, come out and fight me like a man.”

"The Blacks and Tans were British police, correct?"

"Yeah, though that weren't who he were singing about."

Tex smiled in satisfaction when Junji broke into a fit of the most animated laughter he'd seen in a while. It didn't last long, however, as Junji's face quickly fell.

"I miss my father." Junji stated.

Despite the strange, warm euphoria Tex felt, he couldn't help but frown. Thinking about the people Junji had left behind made him sad, especially after the six month long unannounced leave Junji had only recently gotten back from.

"You should sing more." followed Junji.

"I ain’t in the mood."

"Is something wrong?"

After a moment of consideration, Tex shook his head no.

"Nah, my back’s just killing me again." Tex answered, half-truthfully.

"Oh. Would you like me to crack it?"

Tex coughed.

"Think I'm alright." he replied.

"I want to relieve you of discomfort."

"No, it's weird."

"How is it weird?"

It took Tex a few moments to respond. Junji continued to make eye contact while he scarfed down his raw, ungutted fish.

"Look, that just ain't something I want a man to do to me, alright?" Tex explained.

Junji's eyebrows raised with what looked like curiosity.

"Do you see anything morally wrong with it?" asked Junji.

"Well--no."

Junji tore the final chunk of meat off the fish bones with his teeth.

"You are afraid of society?" he pushed as he tossed the scraps into the ocean.

"...I guess"

"I'm not sure if you've noticed, but society is not here."

Despite Junji's truthful statement, Tex shook his head no.

"I couldn't." Tex replied.

"You won't remember it."

Junji had made an excellent point yet again. Tex felt mildly stunned, like he'd been hit in the face with a handful of pocket sand.

"Okay." Tex heard himself say.

"Thank you. Please turn around."

Cursing Junji for having such good reasoning, Tex turned his body so he was facing away from Junji. He squeezed his eyes shut when he felt Junji step behind him.

"I'm scared." said Tex.

"What are you scared of?" Junji asked.

"What if I come?"

"...What?"

"What if I just, come everywhere?"

"Then I will consider becoming a professional."

Tex couldn't think of a response. Junji reached forward and wrapped both his hands around Tex's torso.

"Drop your weight." Junji ordered.

After a moment of hesitation and three fake outs, Tex followed the instructions.

His ears were greeted to a chorus of cracks.

Tex had never believed in heaven before. Or, at the very least, he'd never believed in the pearly gates and gold-paved streets that Sister Marta had told him the Priest had told her that the Pope had said were written about in the bible. But there he was, high in the clouds with the songs of the angels in his ears.

"Oh, I think I'm coming." Tex managed.

"You are not coming."

"I came."

"You did not."

High off his orgasm, Tex curled up into a ball on the rocky shore and pulled the warm blanket of freezing sea water over his shoulders.

"Are you unable to differentiate between different types of pleasure?" asked Junji.

Tex snored.

When Tex awoke, an unclear amount of time later, he found himself at the new meeting table in Junji's laboratory.

He knew he was on Junji's island, but he had no recollection of how he'd gotten there or why he was all wet. He was especially puzzled to see Barton sitting across from him, right next to Junji.

The memory pen was near her hands, as well as a small metal box that looked like a pencil sharpener.

"You good?" Barton asked.

Tex yawned and stretched his arms over his head. To his surprise, he found the pain was gone from his spine.

"What happened?" Tex wondered.

"What's the last thing you remember?" Junji replied.

Tex snapped his fingers to recall the conversation they'd had on the rocks.

"We did heroin, but we were gonna wipe our memories so we wouldn't miss it." he remembered.

"That's the reason you got me to wipe your memory?" asked Barton.

Tex nodded in pleasant surprise. He felt perfectly fine, besides the fact he was drowsy and wet with sea water. Furthermore, he had no desire to do heroin again.

"Man." Tex stated. "I can't believe that had no negative repercussions."

"Like hell it didn’t." Barton replied. "You two both owe me twenty bucks."

"Is Caverly alright?"

"She's fine."

"And the baby?"

After pulling her phone from her pocket, Barton shoved it in Tex's face. Tex examined the screen to see a newborn baby with crow's feet swaddled in a hospital blanket.

"It's a girl." Junji explained. "They texted the extended work group chat to say she will bring the baby by on a Wednesday when they have the time."

"Sounds good." Tex replied.

Junji stared methodically at the table as he spoke, in a way Tex could only describe as tense. Before he could think to question it, however, his attention was diverted by Barton sticking her finger into a hole in the side of the metal box.

"Do I even want to know what that is?" asked Tex.

"It's a pain box." Barton answered. "If you put your finger in, it'll give you a shock equal to the pain of getting mauled by fourteen and a quarter lawnmowers."

Junji stared.

"Oww." Barton said happily as she stuck her finger in again.

Tex watched as Barton pulled her finger out of the box only to insert it inside once more. She continued the process several more times while Junji sat silently with his hands clasped together on the table.

"You doing alright there, pardner?" Tex wondered.

"For some reason, this does not bother me." Junji replied.

Tex scratched his chin.

"Wonder how many hangnails worth of pain getting mauled by fourteen and a quarter lawnmowers is." he stated.

Junji tapped the tips of his index fingers together.

"If we say that a hangnail is a seven-hundredth as painful as getting mauled by a lawnmower," Junji started, "we can represent the problem with the expression fourteen point two five divided by point zero seven. Which is...

"About two hundred." Tex answered after dividing fourteen by seven and adding two zeros.

Again, Junji looked impressed.

"It's two hundred and three." said Barton.

Along with Junji, Tex turned to Barton with a look of disbelief.

"Damn." Tex replied. "Could you do it to any more places?"

"Decimals are for hippies."

Barton continued to stick her finger in and out of the box. Tex found himself agreeing with Junji that, although he wasn't sure why, it didn't bother him.