《Trash Knight: System Recycler: A litRPG Satire that No One Asked For》54: The Revelation of Johnny Jigsup
Advertisement
We burst through the doors of the police station and felt a dozen stares bear into us. We froze. The musketeers inside the station all froze. The citizens froze, the jailers, the prisoners, even the janitor.
It was built like a typical police station. A central desk manned by a cop and a duty-bound civilian. Except the cop was dressed as a musketeer. In the large, open room, there were several other desks for administration, here staffed by guards wearing black armor. All along the walls were cages, some filled, some empty.
This was a bad idea. A terrible idea. Because in one of the cages was my old body, the War Machine armor with its back panel open and its insides empty, now dressed in a sailor girl outfit and chained up in one of the cages.
"Can I help you?" said a nearby voice. It was familiar. It came beside us, at the desk right beside the door.
I looked over and saw him: a musketeer cop with a mustache and long hair over his eyes. It was him. The stoner-narc shopkeep helper.
Did he recognize me?
He was leaned back with his jackboots on the desk, sort of relaxing on the job. He stared longer than comfortable at me, then narrowed his eyes and tilted his head a bit. "Have we... met? You look awfully familiar."
Vil stepped in my way. "We're looking for a man named Johnny Jigsip."
He didn't reply. He dropped his boots back to the floor and leaned over the desk, eyes digging into me. "Standby a second." He stood up, marched around--boots thumping against the hardwood floor--and up to my face.
If I had sweat glands, I would've sweat bullets. Not because I was scared of this puny human, but because I didn't want to fuck up the mission.
Advertisement
"Hey, buddy. I asked you a question," he said.
I had to disguise myself further. But how? My voice! These guys found my normal voice irresistibly sexy last time, so now I knew to be as unsexy as possible. It was a near-impossible feat, but I was the doer of the impossible!
"Uh, ahem, mmmyes!" I said, trying to sound like a geriatric butler. "Forgive me, my good man. I do not believe we have--and I say--we have never met before this time--mmyes!"
"So, wait, what? Have we met or not?"
"No."
He stepped back, crossed his arms, looked me up and down. Then, he eased back again and took the longest, deepest, most animalistic sniffs I had ever seen a person do.
He paused. I froze. Even the cops in the room were watching.
"Sorry," he said. "I might've had you confused with someone else." He laughed and turned back to Vil. "You want ol' Johnny, eh?"
Some of the cops in the back chuckled at the name.
"Yes," Vil said. "If he's here, I believe we can discuss bail."
The musketeer clicked his tongue. "Sorry, buddy. You're about a day too late."
"A day too late?" Vil stepped closer. I could feel his impatience. "Did someone bail him out already?"
"Whoa, now, buddy," the musketeer said. He dropped himself back at his desk and resumed his relaxation posture. "Nobody picked him up. We moved him, you see." He stretched his arm over to open a drawer--wrong drawer--then opened another. He dug around and pulled out a thin stack of papers to filter through. "Yeah, here it is." He showed us. The text was too small to read, but it seemed vaguely official. "An executive order to move him to--" he flipped it back to read, "...warehouse 14. Yikes. That one."
Advertisement
"Where is warehouse 14?" Vil asked.
The musketeer lifted an eyebrow and hit him with a half-smile. "You're not from here, huh? Or maybe you're just too young." He clicked his tongue again. "Man, I'm getting old. Warehouse 14 is the old heretic housing center. They use it for torture and interrogation now." He laughed. "Poor ol' Johnny's probably cut an' dry by now."
Vil drew out the bounty paper and slammed it on the desk. "We need him. Now. Consider this your new executive order."
He snatched the bounty and looked it over. Then, he sighed. "Fuckin' bureaucrats. Every goddamn time, changing their minds. Oh well. Head over that way," he pointed through the wall, but we got the gist, "and walk across the empty lot. The merchants keep most of the bulk goods in the line of warehouses. Obviously, he's in the 14th one."
Vil snatched it back. "Thank you." He sprinted out, and I started to follow.
The musketeer laughed behind us. "Just pick up what's left of him. Maybe you'll get partial credit."
The rest of the station laughed, but we paid them no mind.
We ran around the building, through the empty, grassy plot--an old soccer field, probably--and found the warehouses. They were in a big line, and these buildings were huge, almost big enough to fit a small castle inside--and there were about twenty of them in several rows.
Luckily, they were all marked with painted-on letters on the side. The first row counted up to five, so we ran further in. Here, merchants and shippers were delivering goods to and from with their horse-drawn carts, some loading and unloaded as they would do at the docks. It was an industrial zone, but the sheer size of these structures made us feel tiny. Even the main doors were large enough to sail a ship through.
The sun was setting, and as we ran to the next row, I could see that these buildings cast long, long shadows further than a stone's throw across the grass. Soon, we came upon it. Warehouse 14, it read. The numbers were faded, but the side door was cracked open. The inside seemed impossibly dark, almost like a doorway to the abyss.
Vil slowed to a fast walk as we approached. "Redrim," he said. "Be ready."
I was ready, more than he'd expect.
Vil cracked open the door. Sunlight poured in and caught the swirling dust around us, and we peered inside.
And I felt a cold chill at what we'd found.
There, right in the middle of the warehouse, lit by an overhead light way up on the ceiling, was a solitary table, dwarfed by the open space and scale of the place. A pristine white table cloth covered it, and on it, a candle-lit dinner.
There were four chairs.
Two occupied.
On the left, Johnny, probably. He had a bloody sack over his head, and he was bound to the chair, but he was breathing.
On the far end, a woman. Flowing blonde hair, strange white uniform, and cleavage I couldn't forget. She smiled at us with those deep-red lips.
The door slammed shut behind us. A bolt clacked--we were locked in.
A trap.
The woman aimed her glass of bubbly champagne and hit us with a million-gold smile. "Oh, Redrim. You're late."
Advertisement
- In Serial14 Chapters
Avitus Volten's journey through space and time
Owner of the lead scientific research company in genetic enhancement and quantum physics, Avitus Volten finds himself in a tight spot as he is forced to gamble his life on an unfinished project. Follow along as he finds himself thrown in a gamelike fantasy world with nothing but his enhanced body and his trusty A.I. chip. Will the former researcher be able to find a scientific reason for all the magical events that happen around him, or will he succumb to the dangers of this new world?
8 193 - In Serial12 Chapters
Fighter's Journey In Pokemon World
A guy who has trained most his life on earth gets transmigrated to the world which he thought was a fantasy. " So the life of training and missions are over. I guess I'll just enjoy this world without any worries" How will the guy who has trained in combat and weapons fare in the world filled with pokemon? Is he going to unravel the secrets of the world? Is he going to come out on top of the world creating legends? Only time will be able to tell the future. The cover image is from the courtesy of google images.
8 258 - In Serial56 Chapters
The Third Genesis: Book of Kings
Azazel, an angel in the service of the god of justice, has been banished to the human realm, and told he must make himself a king among men. His kindgom, Tir Shazelle, has fallen under the threat of a powerful demon king, Malkira, who has been kidnapping people from their homes for some terrible secret project. The truth is, Demon King Malkira has heard the prophecy of The Third Genesis; a time when the gods will fall and there will forever be peace in the land. Malkira desperately wants to see the dawning of this new age, and will sacrifice anything or anyone to get what he wants.
8 122 - In Serial7 Chapters
Coupe - The Art of Rebellion
A modern world where various humanoid species co-exist, Human, Animalia, Undead, Vampire and Elf. A certain event triggered a dangerous button which forced a war to happen 3 years ago. The 2 years prolonged war was finally over when Japan proposed a peace conference by creating the group called Coupe. Coupe is stated in history to be the 'saviour' of the world, but there are dark sides of the story that only few knows. The story takes place around the remnants of the Coupe that live their life after the war. Hiroaki Kuznetsoz, one of the members is working as Jack-of-All-Trade in underground world merely for his greedy desire. One day, a girl comes with a request, soon becomes his girlfriend and solves the mystery behind the request together, along with their untold secrets that they refuse to tell each other.
8 199 - In Serial6 Chapters
Mahabharat ke deewane
heya, so here's our community book. peep in to get more details and forms!!
8 111 - In Serial110 Chapters
UNSPOKEN
Unspoken is a book filled with poems and songs I've made throughout my life. Each chapter will be either a song or poem. They are similar to what many of you have experienced in life... featuring love, heartbreak, loneliness, etc. These are all the emotions I was never able to let out so I chose to write them out on paper.
8 203

