Oh, Robert, You Should Really Upgrade

Robert entered a diner on his fifth date with Julie. She sat at a table, seemingly transfixed, staring straight ahead.

"Not her too!" Robert sat at the table and snapped his fingers in front of her face.

"Hi Robert, Julie will be with you shortly ..."

"What the hell is happening?"

Julie blinked and shook her head. "Oh, Robert." She sat up, leaned forward, and kissed him. "I didn't know that you came in. I fell asleep sunbathing."

"Are you okay, Julie? How could you be sunbathing?"

"The new Chip upgrade. I can go anywhere I want."

"Oh, I see. Maybe that explains it ..."

"Explains what, Robert?"

"At the Hyperloop station, waiting passengers appeared expressionless, rarely blinking. In fact, much like you were. But somehow, their bodies moved like robotic-zombies, as if connected to something else. They were able to follow the line, swipe their holo-stamps, and even sit down."

"Oh, right." Julie smiled. "It can even speak for us."

"So, does that mean they were upgraded with a new Chip firmware?"

"Probably ..." She shrugged.

"Now it all makes sense." Robert frowned.

"What does my dear?" Julie sipped her drink and waved for a robot waiter.

"Well, on the Outsource Mind Market, the newest job postings stated, 'Must be Chipped with Agility.'

Julie chuckled.

"What does it mean?" Robert folded his hands.

"Oh, Robert, you should really upgrade. It just means they want your body automated so you can run errands. I mean, it's really great. You can explore another world, or even better ..." She winked at him. "Spend some time with me on the beach."