Chapter 3

The sun had reached its peak, shining brightly down on the marketplace, sharing life giving warmth with those who lived below its heavenly abode.

“It’s such a beautiful day, I’m so glad this miserable winter is finally over, I’ve been stuck inside for far too long.” Sephira mused as she turned her face upwards towards the bright afternoon sky and basked in the welcoming sunshine.

The sunny weather was a welcome change from the gloom of winter that hung so tightly over Fiell nearly every winter.

Her nightmares had made the cold seem even more claustrophobic.

Sephira had jumped on the chance to finally get outside when she offered the opportunity to go to the nearby markets to gather ingredients for the night’s supper.

She had decided she’d take her time and go to the big ones closer to the city center today. It would be a shameful waste of good weather to go to the small vendors nearer her uncle’s estate. Today was a day that demanded it be enjoyed and so she had heeded its call.

Though there was plenty of staff at her Uncle Aris’ estate, she still went on near daily errands. Her uncle Aris was always stressing the importance of self-reliance, and though she tired of his regurgitated speech he gave her all the time, she actually agreed with him.

Life could always change in the blink of an eye, only a fool wouldn’t want to be self sufficient and Sephira was no fool.

Besides, Sephira was now at a marriageable age, and with any luck, she could be managing her own household soon. She didn’t want to be useless, stuck at home with nothing to do like the spinster wives of Aris’ companions in the Imperial government. That life sounded utterly intolerable to her. If she were to have her own household, she would run it herself. Not put it in the hands of someone else.

“How much are these potatoes?” Sephira asked Welsha, a young shopkeeper near her age. She had just had her own wedding the previous week.

Sephira loved to stop by Welsha’s stall whenever she could make her way to the city center and hear her colorful stories she was always sharing. Why the plump, but beautiful young woman was a shopkeeper and not a bard was beyond Sephira. Welsha had a knack for storytelling that rivaled the best.

“They’re three coppers for a dozen,” the blonde girl answered. She had a twinkle in her eye. Sephira knew that meant she had some gossip she was dying to share. “Hey Sephira have you heard the rumors about the rebels?”

“No, what of it?” Sephira replied. To be honest, she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear Welsha’s answer. Talk of the rebels always brought back painful memories of her father.

“Well there’s been whisperings of a plot against the Lord Emperor himself, they say he’s a monster and not our savior. They’re convinced he’s somehow deceiving everyone,” Welsha said in a conspiratorial tone. “Whattaya think about that?”

“I honestly don’t know. I don’t really want to think about,” Sephira replied. There it was. That familiar, uncomfortable itch that came whenever mention of the rebels came up. She shook her head to clear it. It did nothing to rid her of the feeling of something lost though. That was always there. Just waiting under the surface, no matter how she tried to ignore it.

Welsha tried to push the subject more, but Sephira shot down the gossip. She wanted to talk of other things.

The small talk soon died down with Welsha and Sephira made her way to the other vendors to gather the rest of the ingredients. Far too soon the raven haired young woman had finished with her shopping and turned to head home. There was no excuse for her left to dawdle her time away.

But the weather was so nice that it demanded Sephira take her time on her return.

She deviated from her usual route and took a new road home to extend her journey. She needed the warmth of the beautiful spring day to distract her from the memories Welsha’s gossip had served up.

If Sephira had thought that the sun would distract her from that all too familiar itch in the back of her mind, she was wrong. The thoughts only came on stronger for it.

What did she think of it? What did she think of what it would be like if the rebellion’s propaganda were actually true?

She didn’t know.

But she should have.

The itching in her mind increased. It was like a mosquito bite she couldn’t reach.

Sephira’s mind drifted back to her father, “I wish I could remember more about dad. It’s so muddled, but I know he was a good man no matter says about him. That much is true. They can’t ever take that away from me.” Sephira thought as she absentmindedly navigated the narrow roads.

Sephira was so lost in her thoughts that she hadn’t noticed the young girl weaving her way through the crowded path and she stepped right in front of the girl. The collision knocked Sephira’s bag out of her hands and caused the child to fall back onto her rear.

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” Sephira said as she retrieved her bag and held out her hand to help the child up.

“It’s OK, I should’ve been more careful. Kes is always telling me that I don’t pay enough attention anyways,” the young girl replied as she shied away from the outstretched hand.

As the child gathered herself, Sephira noticed her little body was caked in a layer of dirt, and her dark red hair was tangled and oily. It was imminently apparent the youngling had spent her life in squalor.

“Poor child, what kind of parents would allow her to run around the streets like that?” Sephira thought as she observed the young girl. “She looks like she hasn’t eaten in days.”

“Here you go little one,” Sephira said as handed a loaf of bread to the child who snatched it from her hands and ran off. It was no good to let a little thing like that go hungry when you could do something about it. She just prayed that her charity didn’t backfire for the tiny thing.

“Kestrel! Kestrel! Look at what I got! That pretty lady gave me a whole loaf of bread!” The child yelled to her companion as she sprinted towards a shabbily dressed young man with light brown shoulder length hair and a short scraggly beard.

She hadn’t noticed him. He’d come within a few paces of her without Sephira realizing it.

“Thank you for providing supper for Cillia and I,” The man said as he passed by with the young girl beaming proudly in step behind him.

“He doesn’t sound like a typical beggar.”

“Yeah thanks pretty lady!” the redheaded girl called back with a friendly grin. “Kes and me thank you!”

“That was strange. He can’t have been her father though. The girl looks nothing like him,” Sephira thought. “What’s he doing with that youngling?”

*****

“Auntie, I’m home!” Sephira called when she stepped through the doorway with her bounty from the markets. “I’m gonna drop off the food in the kitchen!” she called as she made her way to the kitchen.

Sephira heard a quiet grunt of acknowledgment from her aunt. Sephira’s Aunt Corrine would often forget to respond verbally when she was absorbed in a task.

“Hello Lara, how’s your afternoon been so far?” Sephira asked as she dropped off the groceries in the kitchen.

“It’s been alright, I’ve just waiting on you to get back with the ingredients,” the middle-aged cook said. “You took so long I thought you might’ve finally found yourself a man,” Lara chuckled. “I have a nephew who’s looking for someone you know…”

Sephira rolled her eyes at the household servant. She had a disease common among ladies her age; matchmaking.

They continued their small talk as Sephira joined in with the supper preparation, enjoying her conversation with the cook. It wasn’t long before the food was completed and Sephira bid Lara goodbye to join her family at the table for their evening meal.

“How was your shopping darling?” Corrine asked her niece.

“It was good Aunty, I was able to get a couple discounts, and I even managed to get a loaf of bread for free,” Sephira replied with a smile.

“So how come we aren’t having it with our supper?” her uncle Aris asked in a manner somewhere between playful and interrogative. Even off duty he was still a guard at heart. Her uncle was so well disciplined that she wasn’t sure where his work mannerisms ended and he began. “You didn’t eat it all on the way home did you? We don’t want your future husband to starve,” he teased her.

What was it with all the husband jokes today?

“Uncle, I have no clue what you are talking about. And if it was possible for you to find aunty Corrine, you being such a stiff-back, I could easily find a husband even if I were as fat as one of the Priors,” Sephira retorted. “And no, I didn’t eat it. I accidentally ran into a young orphan girl and knocked her to the ground. She looked so poor and hungry that I felt that I had to give her the loaf, it’s not like we really needed it for ourselves anyway,” she said, not making mention of the young man who had accompanied the tiny redhead.

Why had she done that? And what was it about the young man that made him stick out in her mind.

*****

Everything was blurry, she could barely make out muffled shouts, “No! I’m not leaving!”

More shouting. She couldn’t understand what was being said.

A forced whisper. “What about our daughter?”

“This is bigger than just me! This is bigger than a petty rebellion! If we don’t act we’ll all die!”

More arguing. More begging.

“I won’t say it again! Leave now!”

The scene changes.

“Darling, I’ll always love you, I’m so sorry I won’t be able to see you again. But I will ALWAYS love you, no matter what happens, I want you to know that.”

Who had said that? She should know, she should recall that voice. That face. But there was just…hollowness there.

“Please don’t go!” She hears herself saying, trying and failing to hold back the sobs that wrack her small body.

She can tell from the timbre of the man’s voice that she’ll never see him alive again.

Why did it hurt so much?

“Be brave for me baby.” he says with one last embrace before he stands up briskly and strides out of the door.

“NOOOO!”

The scene changes again.

“I can make it all go away. I can save you from the pain you’re feeling,” a saccharine voice croons as the man’s hands run down the side of her face.

She hates his touch. She wants to wash herself.

His soft touch felt like a violation.

Sephira jerked awake, sweat covered her body.

She raised her hands to rub her eyes, they came back wet.

She had been crying in her sleep. She hadn’t done that in years.

Why had the nightmares started up again? Why was she seeing them again? What had been going on these last few weeks to cause their resurgence?