“Are you sure you are alright?” Giovanni asked for the hundredth time as we exited the limousine in front of our dorms.

I did not respond.

I had effectively evaded each and every attempt Giovanni made at conversation, allowing enough time for the wheels of fortune to turn their cogs in the back of my mind. I had already produced several ways to put Abraham six feet under. I was angry with myself, for making a foolish decision for a foolish boy, but the anger I felt in that moment for Abraham trumped all. He was a fucking idiot, and he could have gotten me killed.

“Jay...” Gio started again as I slammed the door closed and the vehicle took off without pause.

“No.” I stated firmly. “I have somewhere I need to be, so for the love of everything, will you fucking stay in your apartment tonight?”

“Yeah.” His tone was compliant.

I knew I was being a bitch, but Giovanni knew me better than most. He gave me another sad look mixed with something like pity as Abraham’s truck pulled up next to us. My arms shook with my anger, and I swallowed it down the best that I could.

“Just go inside, Gio. And don’t leave.” I snarled.

He retreated like a dejected puppy with his tail between his legs. For a split moment, I wanted to apologize to him, but the apology never came. I turned to face the truck as Abe rolled down the passenger window. His face gave it away and that angered me more.

“I have all your stuff.” He spoke low, already knowing.

I opened the door and shuffled in, slamming the door behind me.

“Jay, look...” He started, and the sound of his voice caused my fist to fly forward, punching him straight in the jaw.

“You fucking asshole!” I shrieked like a banshee.

His hands raised up to cover himself from the onslaught of my fist. Blood dripped from his mouth, and I craved to see more. A tooth, that might calm me down. I only saw red, and I unleashed my anger in the front seat of his truck.

“I should fucking kill you!” My voice was not my own.

“Jay, calm down!” He pleaded without returning my blows.

“Don’t tell me to calm down!”

“We’re going to be late.”

I sagged against my seat, putting as much distance between him and myself. My breathing was erratic as I watched him wipe the blood from his face. My throat still burned, reminding me of how much in this moment, I hated him.

He pulled away from the curb and remained quiet, my breathing the only sound in the entire cab besides the whir of the heat coming through the vents.

“Lee put men on your tail.” He finally spoke when we reached the highway. “They’ve been following us for the past week. More and more have been spotted in Company territory. It was getting out of hand. Black needed to be told.”

“You could have left me the fuck out of it.” I snarled, crossing my arms as I turned my attention out the window.

“No, Jay, I couldn’t.” He insisted. “It came as a surprise to him, and he needed an explanation. I put both of our asses on the line, not just yours.” He lifted his shirt, not taking his eyes off the road.

I winced.

Bruises peppered his entire torso, small and large. By the looks of the color, he was probably suffering from a few broken ribs, or more than a few. My anger flickered, trying to stay alight even as the revelation sank in.

“You still deserved it.” I said, miffed. “I won’t apologize.”

“I’m not asking you to.” He chuckled, but his eyes crinkled in pain. “Just for a sliver of understanding.”

“You might not even get that...fucker.” I mumbled the last part as the remnants of my mood faltered and then completely went out.

“Are you nervous?” He asked, changing the topic.

“Not anymore.” I sighed. “I just want to get it over with now.”

“Well, don’t worry. You’re going to be fine.” He tried to comfort my growing anxiety. “Plus, I managed to get Ryker off the hook. He believes we’re just taking the night off, and that you’re still at the dinner.”

“Even with Giovanni being back?”

“Unless Giovanni gives up the jig, you should be in the clear.” His eyebrows shriveled with frustration.

“Not like it matters now.” I grumbled.

“What do you mean?”

“Abraham, can I ask you a serious question?” I prompted.

“Sure.”

“Do I look fucking stupid to you?” I asked.

“Is this a trick question?” His tone shook a bit.

“No.”

“Then no. You’re unbelievably sharp.” He spoke firm.

“Then why was I completely blinded to the fact that Ryker is part of the same mob that I fucking work for?” I sighed, watching the cars pass.

He paused for a long time, most likely in an attempt to come up with a logical response.

“We all knew you were coming...” Abraham started, and my chest expanded with anxiety. “Black made sure that Ryker, Nick, and me were aware of you and Giovanni’s arrival. We were aware that you would be bunking with Ryker to keep an eye on Gio, that way Ryker could keep an eye on you. We didn’t know what you looked like, only your name. You caught Ryker off guard when you first got here. We were also instructed that you were to be kept unaware that we knew of the situation. But...” He grinned. “I don’t play by the rules.”

“Ryker and Nick kept up with their ends.” He continued.

“So, he’s known the whole time?” I interrupted. “That I’m Gio’s babysitter? That I fight in the Underground? That I work for Black?”

“Well, everything besides the fighting.” He sighed. “None of us were prepared for that. Ryker is still blissfully unaware of that tidbit.”

“So, he’s been lying the whole time?” I mused.

“I wouldn’t be too mad at him. As much as he pisses me off, I’ll still defend him.” He glanced over at me. “You’ve been lying too. All for the sake of Black.”

“All for the sake of my life, Abe.” My jaw ticked. “If I do not follow orders, and I am deemed useless, I’ll be disposed of. You and your mob siblings are protected by the very families that give Black all of his power.”

“You chose this kind of life, Jay, as unpretty as it is.”

“I didn’t choose anything. I needed the money.” I had sunk further into my seat, trying like hell to become one with the truck.

“Money for what?” He asked.

“That’s none of your business.” I closed my eyes as I rested my forehead against the cool glass. “It was a long time ago.”

The warehouse where Abraham was instructed to bring me mirrored that of Lee’s strip club and the pit in my stomach started to burn. When we finally parked and I grabbed my duffle out of the back seat, I stopped for just a moment to breathe. I closed my eyes and focused on the pattern of my inhale and exhale, which started erratic and then eventually fell into a calm rhythm. When I opened my eyes, I could feel Abe’s stare on the side of my face.

“What?” I asked.

“How do you do that?” He questioned.

“Do what?” I looked over at him.

“Calm yourself so quickly.” He explained. “I would be panicking right about now.”

“Thanks for that.” I grimaced. “I’ve done this for a substantial portion of my life. It’s just like any other fight. There’s only one goal; don’t go down.”

His smile was without humor, and I knew he would be more worried about this than I was, even though he would not be the one on the mat. I exited the truck and Abraham came to stand beside me, looking forward at all the people heading in the same direction we would be. I sighed and started walking with the crowd. Murmurs could be heard all around in synchronization with the clicking of my heels on the asphalt.

When we approached the entrance, a man about my age stepped out of the group of men he had been conversing with and gave me a smile. Weird. He had jet black hair, straight as a needle, pulled back into a sleek ponytail. It looked longer than my own. His dark eyes were rimmed with long, dark lashes. Perfect genetics, obviously.

“Jaylyn Sloan.” He held out a hand for me to shake, so I took it firmly. “We’ve been expecting you. My name is Kindred. I’ve been instructed to show you around.”

“Nice to meet you.” My tone held confusion, and Abe stood awkwardly beside me.

Why the fuck is this man being so nice to me?

“I’m sure you won’t be fighting in that…” He eyed me up and down. “So, let me show you to your locker room. It will be private, of course. We usually only dabble with men in the ring. You will be our first honored female.” He sounded proud.

“I suppose there’s a reason for that?” I questioned as we entered the building, shuffling between people trying to find their seats.

“Lee prefers that females remain flowers in our Territory; something to be cherished and taken care of.” He explained.

I rolled my eyes at the thought. I wouldn’t fit into Lee’s structured world, even if I wanted to. The arena was more massive on the inside than the outside let on. Rows and rows of seating elevated from the pit outwards. There was box seating built along each wall where people already crowded, drinking champagne, and laughing.

I had to force myself not to snarl under my breath. As much as I enjoyed fighting, fighting for the rich to become even richer burned my ass. Especially when my cut was only a mere fraction of what they made, and it this case, my portion was none.

Only Ryker’s freedom. His freedom to keep breathing.

Kindred stopped in front of a door and gave me another warm smile. “This is to be your private locker room. It is complete with some warm-up equipment, a shower, a closet to keep your belongings, and so on. Mr. Lee has instructed that you utilize whatever you need, and don’t be afraid to ask for anything during your night with us. His only request is that you remain here until your match. Mr. Crowley will be allotted to accompany you, at your discretion.”

“Thank you.” I returned his smile, even though I knew it was fake.

“If you are no longer in need of my services, I shall depart. I will return when it is time.” He gave a curt nod and turned on his heels.

I leaned into Abraham and whispered quietly. “Are you getting a strange feeling about all of this?”

“Absolutely.” He said as he looked around expectantly.

“Maybe you should go scope it out, while I shower and get ready.” I suggested.

“On it.” He watched me enter the room and kept eye contact with me until the door snapped shut.

I could hear his heavy footfalls stray away from the door and I sighed. If now was a time to panic, I was ready for it. But the panic never came. The calm I found back at the truck was holding its ground. The locker room was not like the normal grungy metal playground I was used to, and instead had huge closets lined up on one side with keypads installed in them.

The other side hosted a bar area and a counter that had food steaming like it had just been brought out. On the other side of the bar and food an entryway led to six private showers, each stall adorned with anything you could possibly need while in them. Several expensive soaps and shampoos lingered on the walls. Each stall had multiple showerheads poking out in different angles all leading to the center above a small drain.

The back end of the room, past the closets, hoisted various work out equipment, all shiny and new. I whistled low. Lee obviously spared no expense when it came to his best fighters. But if I was on the roster, where were the rest of them? I heaved my duffle onto the bench across from the closets in the middle of the room.

I looked up to find a small note taped to one of the closets.

Miss Sloan,

You should find everything to your liking. This closet has remained unlocked for your use. If you have need of me, I shall be seated in box 5, directly center of the ring. I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors tonight.

My stomach threatened to turn with the weight of this reality. I vaguely remembered the deal I had struck with Black in my teen years, but as an adult who has seen too much of the world at such an early age, this was completely different. It was only supposed to be temporary, Black’s deal. But I ended up being swallowed by the Company instead.

Black had refused to let go.

And I had basically become just short of a slave for him.

I tried to push my thoughts to the side as I grabbed the towel out of my closet and set it down.

Breathe, Jaylyn, breathe.

Rosemary Sloan. Jason Sloan. Mulberry Street. Brookline.

I could feel the air entering and exiting my lungs, but the tiniest hint of anxiety burned the back of my throat, no matter how hard I tried to fight it. I unzipped the black dress and stepped out of my heels. Following the path, I had taken before, I stepped into a private stall and turned, hanging my towel on the hook, and letting the dress fall to my ankles.

The cool air turned heavy once I started the shower and steam filled the tiny space. Forgetting that still hadn’t taken my panties off, I stepped under the steady streams. The hot water burned my sore muscles, but it felt wonderful regardless. I turned, letting each part of my body be struck by the penetrating water, saving my face for last.

Closing my eyes, I let the streams run over my head and down my face, relishing in the fact that this could possibly be the best shower I’ve ever been in. The sounds of the people just beyond this little room melted into background noise, and I giggled to myself as the water started to run tan. The make-up used to cover up my identity finally started to give away under the heavy pressure, and I sighed in absolute contentment. It was like shedding the past few months away. As much as I found a way to live day to day, and people to fit in with, that wasn’t who I was.

This is who I am.

I smiled as the ink embedded in my arms, back, chest, and neck slowly surfaced. It was almost like they were taking a long breath after a forced hibernation. I felt lighter already, the little bubble of anxiety going back out as the water washed away my physical and mental troubles. I grabbed the loofa hanging on the wall with a brand-new tag on it and inspected that newness before I applied soap to the sponge and lathered it against my stomach.

Washing down my body, I mentally kicked myself before removing the last bit of clothing I had on. The soap worked magic against my skin and if I were a human without common sense, I would have fallen under the tangible spell this shower provoked.

“Jay, we have a…” The grumble paused as I jumped. “…problem.”

“Jesus Christ, Abraham.” I used one arm to cover my chest and the other with the loofa to cover the apex between my legs. “Do you know how to fucking knock?”

“You have tattoos.” He stated, like a moron.

“Of course, I do, you idiot.” I stated, not like a moron. “Do you mind?”

“Oh, shit. Yeah. Sorry.” His gaze lingered longer than I expected before he leaned back out and shut the door.

Effectively ruining my shower, I hurried to finish and get rinsed off. I snatched the towel off the hook and wrapped myself up tightly, and proceeded to step out from the shower.

“Sorry, Jay. I wasn’t expecting…” He started.

“Wasn’t expecting what?” I cut him off. “For me to be naked in the one place in this entire room that I would be naked in?”

“Well.” He reached up and rubbed the back of his head. “Not exactly like that.”

If I wasn’t mistaken, his face had turned just a shade darker.

“What’s the problem, Abe?” I sighed.

“It’s Black.” Abe swallowed hard when I spun to look at him. “He’s here.”