Everything was in pain.

His stomach crunched and twisted in ways that were not possible. Akira regretted cooking the glowing blue mushrooms he found in the corner of his apartment.

But there was nothing to eat. He had no money to even pay the bills, much less feed himself.

Times were tough for a genius high school detective when the market was saturated with them. Especially for a high school detective that was technically not a high school student anymore. He was a college student now, and police dropped a college detective like they did a cigarette butt. They stomped on it.

He was in so much pain that he could barely crawl to his porcelain throne. The holy land that would free him from this pain and suffering. The distance between the bathroom and where he lay blurred.

He should have known that the mushrooms were poisonous.

But they called to him. Spoke to him. They danced to him, demanding he eat them.

How could he say no?

It was like his grandfather a great detective on his own right used to say: If it didn’t kill you, then you get more resistant to the poison.

His grandfather would be able to eat glowing blue mushrooms without flinching. He was called Iron Stomach for a reason.

Light flashed in the corner of his eyes. Instinctively he knew on a level that this was it. This was death. His life flashed past his eyes. If there was one regret, it was losing his last five hundred yen to a storm drain.

#

“Wow. It’s very rare for a person to get isekai’d without being killed by a truck.” A voice as slick as oil said.

Akira couldn’t see or move.

“Not responding. I guess the shock of eating…” Paper flipped. “Glowing blue mushrooms in the corner of the room-”

He snorted and broke out in laughter. “Seriously? You ate glowing blue mushrooms that were just growing in the corner of your apartment? That’s hilarious!”

No response.

“And you can’t talk.” The man hummed. “Interesting. Very interesting. There is a world that has requested a hero summoning. They have sent me my brib- offering. So, you should just be able to fit in there.”

More pages flipped.

“As for power…well…it says you have a revolver on you. That’s kind of like my boss. Guy has a revolver on him because he likes shooting things.”

The revolver was his grandfather. He gave it to him after contracting salmonella. He remembered his last moments well. He was shaking in fear, his face pale, dripping with sweat. Akira took his hand, and his grandfather uttered his last words.

I shouldn’t have eaten that kebab from the trash.

Then he died.

“Alright. I decided. You will be able to shoot beams. Because why not. Of course, if you have a disagreement, you’re free to talk now?”

Pure silence.

“I guess not. Well, I’ve given you the power. The rundown of the world is you have to kill the Demon King. You get points unless of course you don’t.” The sound of chair creaked. “What’s that? You don’t want points. You’d rather give me all the points you earn. Fantastic!”

Akira didn’t understand what was happening, but he felt that the person talking to him was scum.

“Alright then!” He clapped. “Portal will open, you will be summoned to another world, and I will take the gold the Kingdom has given me for the summoning. Good luck and have fun!”

#

“The hero is not moving.” One of the sorcerers informed the princess.

She gave him a look that told him she could see that. He wilted away into the background.

“Move aside,” she ordered.

She walked towards the hero and crouched to check if he was still alive.

Had their god, sent a dead body….again? After they sent all that gold?

To her relief, he was still breathing. Though, he was still frothing from his mouth. He looked poisoned. She pressed her hand on his stomach and used healing magic.

His face became less pale and soon he woke up.

The hero that was sent this time was a lot less fat. He was tall, wore a brown duster, and a wore a hat with a black ribbon around it. Like the other heroes he had black hair and black eyes.

“Hero.” She grabbed his hand. “Are you alright?”

“Where am I?” She heard him whisper to himself.

The hero stood up, looking around clearly confused at where he was. That was also strange. The God should have explained everything to him.

“Yup.” He nodded, coming to a conclusion. “I’m hallucinating on those blue mushrooms.”

“Hero?”

“I didn’t expect my hallucination to be an RPG game?” He rubbed his chin, he gave her a curious look and then looked around the room. “A type of nightmare? The princess is clearly not my type. Does that mean that the hooded men are here for an orgy? Well, if it is an nightmare orgy, I’d better get this over with.”

The hero suddenly disrobed, throwing his clothes to the light. “Alright! Do your worst!”

Their god had sent an idiot…again.

He pointed to one of the chamber maids. “Miss, give all the foods you can give me. If I’m going through a nightmare like this, I might as well eat the finest foods!”

The chamber maid looked to her, clearly confused. The sorcerers looked to each other in confusion but waited for her to say something.

“Please, go get the hero some food,” she said. “He’s clearly confused. He was poisoned before the summoning and is delirious.”

“Stand aside evil woman, I shall get the worst over with!” He declared. His dick swung from side to side almost smacking her in the face.

“I’ve never had sex with a man before, but you do have a handsome face.” He pushed up the man’s chin. The old man that he was hitting on was blushing. “But you shall be the firs-”

She meant to hit him with a small lightning spell, but her spell erupted into a third-tier spell. It would be enough to slay ten men. The spell blew through him and the sorcerer that he was hitting on dodged in time.

Then he fell.

Her face was beet red.

“Princess!” One of the sorcerers spoke.

“Is he alive?” She asked.

The sorcerer checked and then nodded.

“Okay.” She blew a breath in relief. “Take him to a bed chamber. Make sure that you tie him to the bed, so he doesn’t do anything insane.” She paused. “Let me know when he wakes up and treat his wounds.”

She watched a few armored guards hoist the butt naked hero away. She took a moment to regain herself, brushing her dress free from dirt.

The hero was at least…unique compared to the last few hero summoning they did. She hoped that because he was unique, he would survive.