《The Hedge Wizard》Chapter 9 - Boiling Pools

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Hump stared down at his map frowning. They were lost. There was no other way to put it, no matter what Vamir said. The man had led them off the beaten path, away from the tunnels that had already been cleared, and away from reinforcements. The field station’s maps mostly covered the major tunnels of the dungeon. Where they were now was anyone’s guess.

The dungeon was like an ant nest. Dozens of connecting tunnels and chambers bored into the crag, shaped by the magic of the dungeon core and whatever god-forsaken will was behind it. The map had cost Hump two coppers, plus one more for the shopkeeper to spill the recent gossip. So far, the kobolds had been pushed back toward their inner chambers, but the pests were collapsing tunnels as they went. Progress was slow, loot was infrequent, and the kobolds left a score of deadly traps in their wake. All in all, it made for high tensions amongst the dungeoneers. There was something about spike pits and hidden wall rooms that just didn’t inspire a cheerful mood.

“No one wants to be that guy,” Hump explained to Bud.

“What guy?”

“The one that’s too excited for a fight and rushes on in, only to step on a spikey stick some gangly midget of a creature spent five minutes setting up.”

Vamir had decided to lead them away from the main force and down a series of side tunnels in the hopes of getting lucky. If they were attacked or injured, they were beyond the earshot of anyone that might help them. The darkness was suffocating. It closed in on them from all sides, only pushed back by the light of Hump’s staff.

“This map’s about as much use as a blank piece of paper.” Hump scowled, shoving it back inside his pack. He withdrew his chalk once more, marking the wall with an arrow so that they could find their way back up. It shone faintly in the dark.

There was an eerie silence, broken by distant echoes of wind and gods know what else. Hump shivered. Down in the dungeons, sounds warped and changed as they echoed, like a musician’s song travelling the complex valves of some loathsome instrument. Sometimes something as simple as dripping water might sound like the hums of a ghost if it travelled far enough. Or vice versa, Hump thought, eyeing a suspicious looking leak in the ceiling.

They were in a narrow tunnel, one of many that formed a web through the dungeon, sloping down into its depths. Hump felt a constant hum of essence across his skin like an irritating wind, covering his skin in goosebumps. He felt like they were being watched, but all he could see beyond the light of his spell was darkness, so complete, it was as if the world fell away at its edge.

Even for Hump, these tunnels were too small to move comfortably. At least he didn’t have it as bad as Bud; the poor knight had to keep his head ducked down the entire time, yet he hadn’t uttered a single complaint. Just another thing to give them a disadvantage. Kobolds thrived in tight spaces and darkness. They were weak, cowardly creatures, but given time to prepare they could create devastating ambushes and traps. This was their territory, so they could choose to fight on their terms. In Hump’s experience, that choice was never fair.

“I told you not to bother,” Vamir said.

Hump let out a sigh. “And I told you this is a dungeon and anyone with a bit of common sense knows not to go wandering about on their own without a decent map of the area.”

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Vamir looked at Bud. “Are all the boys your age like this, or does he just have the hump?” He scratched his chin thoughtfully. “Perhaps that’s where the saying comes from. Hump the grump.”

“I find it reassuring that he’s got a strategy for dungeon exploring,” Bud said. “He’s prepared. That’s respectable.”

They reached another tunnel, a dark hole in the left wall that delved deeper into the crag. Celaine peeked her head around and peered ahead, while Hump held his staff out to illuminate the tunnel.

Once they’d passed it, Vamir turned to Hump. “We’ll be fine, kid. I get it. You want to do things by the book. But they’ve been clearing the upper levels for the best part of a week. There won’t be a scrap of loot left.”

Hump had to admit, the man had a point. Profit took priority after all.

“Being careful is good,” Vamir continued. “But you need to ask yourself, do you wish to remain a hedge wizard all your life? Those that take no risks are doomed to their place in the world forever.”

“As long as it’s a long life, sure. Why not?”

Vamir shrugged. “Think on it. What do I always say, Celaine?”

Celaine sighed. “I don’t care. Let me concentrate.” She’d knelt and used a stick to brush aside a small mound of rocks that looked like they’d tumbled down from the wall. Hump held up the light and watched curiously. Nothing but empty ground.

“Celaine…” Vamir goaded.

Even from behind, Hump could swear she rolled her eyes. “Better to burn bright and briefly than to never burn at all,” she said tiredly.

“Exactly!” Vamir grinned. “Have some ambition, boy.”

“Tell me that when you’re on fire,” Hump snapped. “Or bleeding out. Or after you step on a spike trap and die of rot. Or have a cage of centipedes dropped on your head. There’s a reason people don’t charge headfirst into a kobold den.”

Celaine scoffed. “You’re such a wimp.”

“No amount of loot is worth dying for,” Hump said. “Gods, I shouldn’t even have to say this.”

“Seems to me the solution’s pretty obvious,” Celaine said.

Hump waited for a moment, then asked, “What?”

She stopped walking and glanced back, smirking. Her eyes shone with mischief. “Just don’t die.”

Hump frowned at her. “Well there goes my plans for the day…”

She laughed and kept walking. Hump’s eyes noticed the sway of her hips and he found himself grinning.

“What are you smiling about?” Vamir growled.

Hump wiped the smile from his face and cleared his throat. “Nothing.”

They relied entirely on Hump’s staff for light, and even with just that, Celaine found and disarmed three traps along the path. She had a perception Hump couldn’t match even aided by magic. But it was risky business. Usually, most parties focused their attention in a small area, working together with four or five sweepers to ensure that the pathways were clear.

Dungeons weren’t meant to be cleared this way. And it was Celaine that was in the most danger. A single lapse in judgement or distraction and she might walk right into something she would never come out of. Hump had seen it more than once. One minute, a party member was bantering as usual, the next their head was crushed to paste.

Why was Vamir so confident? Four people wandering alone in the dungeon was a sure-fire way of taking casualties, yet the man strolled along behind them as if this were nothing more than a walk in the park. He was Celaine’s teacher, yet he displayed little concern for her safety.

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They reached a large chamber and Hump felt a blast of heat as he stepped inside. A series of pools filled the room, glowing with a dim blue light. Violent bubbles raged across the surface, filling the room with a churning echo that reminded Hump of rushing blood. The boiling water filled the room with a thick mist.

“Something doesn’t smell right in here,” Celaine said. “What is that?”

“It smells like food,” Hump said, a sinking feeling in his stomach. “You don’t think we’re nearing their inner chambers, do you?”

Vamir had a frown on his face. “I’d expect more guards on the inner chambers. An outpost maybe.”

“Amazing,” Bud said, kneeling to take a closer look at one of the pools. “It’s just stone at the bottom. How’s it boiling?”

“Dungeon magic,” Hump said. “The pools have absorbed the residual essence given off by its core.”

“Which makes them hot?” Bud asked.

Hump nodded. “Essence is another form of energy; it can affect temperature. Here it’s causing the water to heat but it could also freeze it. It largely depends on the nature of the dungeon. Essence water’s key to all sorts of alchemy. We should have brought a bucket.”

“It’s fascinating,” Bud said. “The entire dungeon is. I can’t believe magic can make something so large and complex.”

Hump nodded, eyeing the boiling water. “I suppose it is, in a dark and twisted and murderous way. Dungeons can create life, that’s the most primordial form of magic I can think of.”

“It’s a shame they’re all evil,” Bud said.

“Is it evil if it knows no better?” Vamir chimed in. “Is a cat evil when it plays with a mouse? It simply is as it was created to be. Magic is inherently chaotic. It makes sense that creatures born of it lack our moral compass.”

Hump paused. That wasn’t something most people knew. Vamir wasn’t just powerful, he was educated. The old man would have probably debated the topic for hours with him, Hump on the other hand had had his enthusiasm for philosophy argued out of him. “Evil or not, they hunt and kill humans. We can’t leave them here.”

“Of course not,” Vamir said sinisterly. “When a wolf comes for the sheep, a farmer must put it down.”

“I wonder why they do it,” Bud said.

“For the same reason as everything else,” Vamir said. “They do as they were born to do. And dungeons were born to corrupt, to fester, to consume the lands. Only from the feast can they grow stronger.”

“You believe them to be sentient?” Hump asked. There were many theories on how dungeons did what they did. Dungeoneering contained a melting-pot of adventurers from far-off places, sometimes with obscene cultures and beliefs, each proffering their account of how things worked. In all, the common lore was confused as to what dungeons actually were.

“I’m certain of it,” Vamir said. “It takes a mind to create something as complicated as this, and to spawn the creatures that dwell within.”

“I’m not convinced,” Hump said. “Until I hear one say ‘hello’, I’m going to think of it as one of many theories.”

“What a pragmatic approach.” Vamir said. “You think like a wizard.”

“I am a wizard.”

“There are wizards and there are wizards,” Vamir said. “You lad, are the first.”

Hump narrowed his eyes at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Vamir smiled slightly and shook his head.

“Why would you invite me to the party if you didn’t think I was capable?”

“It’s nothing,” Vamir said. “Forget I said anything. I meant no offense,”

“Right. Well, there are arseholes, and there are arseholes. Can you guess which you are?”

Vamir stared at Hump and blinked, then the corners of his mouth twisted. Hump thought he saw a flash of something in the man’s eyes, and his heart raced.

Hump gulped. A chill ran through him, but he refused to let it show.

“I’ve found something,” Celaine called.

Hump turned away first, relieved for the opportunity. She was nearing the other end of the chamber, standing over one of the pools. It only took a heartbeat for Hump to guess what she was looking at. A red stain splattered the stone pathway, coming from the exit on the opposite side of the chamber. Blood.

They walked over to stand by her side, and Hump felt his insides churn. He raised his staff for a better look. Bodies. Or, more accurately, what remained of them. The corpses had been neatly disassembled before being thrown into the boiling pot. They were cooking.

Bud stumbled back and vomited. Hump fought not to join him.

“What is this?” Hump said quietly. He took a step back, unable to look any longer. But as he turned his eyes, he spotted bones at the bottom of some of the other pools. Dozens of them. “Gods above. Where did they come from? Bledsbury didn’t report anybody missing.”

Bud was on his knees murmuring a prayer. Celaine’s face had gone even paler than before. Even Vamir appeared disturbed.

“There are many villages along the Mountain Road,” Vamir said.

“But someone would have known,” Hump said. “Someone would have seen the kobolds leaving the dungeon.”

“The storms,” Celaine said. “It would have made travel more difficult.”

“Not difficult enough for a village to ignore vanishing people!” Hump snapped.

“Unless they took them all,” Vamir said. “There must be other routes to get out of the dungeon. It could easily take a few days before anyone found and reported an empty village.”

“Gods above,” Hump said. “We need to get help. We can’t leave them here, to be… They deserve a proper burial.” He stepped back, staying as far from the pools as he possibly could. Just staying on his feet was difficult. He felt his stomach churn again and caught himself against the wall. Gods, the smell… He’d thought it was food.

“There might be more,” Vamir said quietly. There was a seriousness to his voice that cut through Hump’s nausea like a knife.

More people held like animals, waiting to be torn apart and sent to the boiling pools. Hump ground his teeth.

“You have a decision to make,” Vamir said. “I’m going to take a look and see if they’ve taken prisoners. I won’t blame you if you want to back out. If I’m wrong, and we’re nearing their inner chambers, we could have the entire den on us in minutes. That is the risk.”

Bud rose to his feet. “I’m with you.” He turned to look at Hump.

Hump’s throat had gone dry, his hand felt clammy against his staff. It had been risky before, but this was outright crazy. If they were caught alone in the kobolds’ inner chambers… Well, they’d end up as dinner too.

But if there were people down here that needed help, could he turn his back? Hump peered at the exit out of the corner of his eye. The others would be stranded without his wizard light.

Hump forced a grim smile. “Me too.”

Celaine simply nodded her agreement.

Vamir gave him a grateful look, and Hump thought it might be the first genuine emotion he’d seen in the man. “Thank you. Take a moment to collect yourselves before we move forward. If they have prisoners, we need to know. If we can, we get them out, otherwise we report back to the field station and come back here with everyone that’s willing.” He looked between them all, eyes hard and focused. “Any questions?”

Nobody said a word. Bud was back on his feet.

“Good,” Vamir said. “I’m going to take the lead from here. Bud, I want you at my back, Celaine next, and then Hump be ready with a spell. We’re going to need crowd control. Do what you can to slow them down.”

There were nervous nods all around.

They proceeded in silence, following the trail of blood out of the chamber and into dark tunnels. Hump dimmed the light of his staff, reducing the amount of essence he channelled into the spell to a mere sliver. They stalked forward quietly, Vamir’s shadow a good ten paces ahead of them. Celaine could scout silently, but Vamir was a ghost. Hump wouldn’t have even sensed his presence if he hadn’t known the man was there.

It wasn’t long until they saw steady light at the end of the tunnel. Hump heard the murmuring echoes of alien voices. Kobolds communicated in croaks and chirps and weird clicking mouth sounds that few humans could replicate.

Vamir stopped short of the chamber and held up a hand for them to wait. His attention was on something on the ground. After a minute, he removed a mantrap from the centre of the tunnel, carefully moving a thin strip of wire to the side of the path where they could step on it.

Hump smelt the chamber first. An overpowering waff of blood and rot. Again, his stomach churned, but this was business now. He pushed back his fear and focused on the task at hand.

The tunnel opened out into a dank little chamber, dimly lit with crystals in the walls that glowed a sickly green. There were no kobolds in sight. An alcove on the left side held a rack of butcher’s knives that drew Hump’s eye first. Saws, cleavers, and knives as long as an arm. Around them, the entire space was so covered in blood that Hump could have mistaken it for paint, apart from a dark hole in the ground of the corner.

And there were cages. Many, many cages. Men. Women. Children.

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