It was yet another sleepless night. Kenan had stewed over his new tomes for over a week. He itched when he thought about them. Like a poor imitation of excitement that really was a deep-seated anxiousness. He didn’t know what it would mean when he produced his first spark. Would he change? Did it mean something would always be fundamentally different with him? What if he messed up and burnt himself? The whole house? He knew why magic was exciting, he didn’t know it was scary too.

He was awake. Attention to the stark difference between the moons and the rest of the atmosphere. Kenan wanted to understand how a big blue rock was forced into the sky and tackled back down. Much less how its elusive sister danced like a little rock out of sight.

There was a slight creek and light bloomed into his room. He cringed at both the surprise and the sudden illumination. But his panic was drenched down to confusion. Kenan knew the dark figure taking a significant portion of his doorframe was his father. “Kenan,” Tyris whispered. “Your awake.”

“Pa? What are you doing?” He shielded his eyes.

“Get dressed. Grab your lantern.” His father turned and left.

“Huh?” Kenan's eyes took further time to adjust as darkness rushed back in. He grumbled and stood. Dion, his faithful fox was still asleep. Nor did he rouse from Kenan’s repeated attempts to wake the beast. There was another slew of hushed words before he got all of his clothes in order and on. Another minute went into trying to find his lantern.

He forgot the door was closed and stumbled into it. After he successfully used the wooden egress correctly, he bumped into his father. “Steady Ken.” Tyris grabbed his son's shoulder and stilled him.

“What’s happening?”

“Follow”

“Where?”

“Follow.”

Kenan sighed. He resigned himself to whatever prospective chore or task he was in for. Despite his great annoyance he let go of his drive to unveil the enigma. Kenan's father was fair but had only a negligible tolerance for his curiosity. On a good day, he could deprive five answers from Tyris. Seven if he was lucky. If his father was short after two, much less one, that didn’t convey greatness in Kenan's mind.

Their walk was in uneasiness. The silence made Kenan unsure of his steps. Every crack of the floorboards deepened and his breath was echoed off the wall like loud roars. Then the duo crossed over the bounds of their home and into the outside. The part of his back Kenan didn’t know was tensed let go.

The sky showed a lot more than the picture he saw out of his window. Pinpricks of radiance broke through space and peered at Kenan. Lavender, crimson, and verdant colors all mixed together from small dots in the sky. It confused him, twisted his senses, and made his stomach flop. Carth and its majesty were high in the sky and hid the red queen Luarlia with its smaller realm just behind.

“Aye Ken. You could reach them, you know.” The baritone of his father's voice made Kenan realize he had stopped.

“I think I would need really long arms.”

“Ha!” Tyris laughed. He put a hand on his son's shoulder and kneeled while he stared at the sky. “Do you remember when I used to put you on my shoulders? You would try to take the clouds and eat them. Like the distance wasn’t there.”

There was a moment. Something passed and went. Both Kenan and Tyris sensed the subtle shift but neither mentioned it. The large man stood and stretched his back. “Follow.” Kenan obeyed. Most of his mind went into the sky. He felt as if he could just get a little higher, if his voice could echo out to them. He felt that he could take their secrets.

The farmstead passed beneath his feet. Earth and grass crunched on his soles and the wind whistled in a serene note. Kenan didn’t know how long the walk was but It was pleasant. Then they stopped in front of two trees. He had known of these, tracked to them whenever he was bored. Walked Jefned to them and climbed them when he could.

“Do you know of our home son?” Tyris snuffed out his lantern and sat down against a tree. Kenan followed the actions and his back landed on the bark opposite of his father.

“Our home? The stead Pa?”

“No. To the west. Past the capital, near the border.”

“Oh. Ma told me about that. But I don’t know anything.”

“Hm.” Tyris looked to the stars. Past and through them. “We have a long. long line. Most days I wish you could meet your grandfather, some of them I wish I could’ve met mine.”

“Do you miss him?” Kenan tried to see whatever his father looked at.

“Aye.”

“I would miss you.” His father's breath changed. It almost came to a complete stop before there was a long intake and a longer out.

“Your uncle and I would climb trees like this. There were these two huge, behemoth oaks in the forest. I met your mother on them.” He smiled.

“As big as these Pa?”

“Oh no. These trees were much much bigger. We said we could’ve reached the stars if we climbed to the top.”

“Did you ever?”

“Hmmm.” Tyris frowned. “I don’t think so.”

“I’ll climb it.”

“You’ll do it? Your gonna go there?”

“Yup.”

“Maybe you really don’t know what distance is.” Tyris laughed. “Son. My father walked me out into the woods and had the same talk. His father too. The same conversation before him. You are my only son. Kenan. Do you know what I mean?”

“No. What are you saying? What talk?”

“Doco probably isn’t going to have children. Lucy will be married off. You will be the last and only. All of my uncles and aunts only had girls. My cousin's children all belong to a different family.”

“I don’t understand.”

“You will. Not right now but you will. Listen close, Kenan. You don’t know how to be a man. People will teach you. I won’t. Your uncle might, others will definitely,”

“Why not?! What’re you saying Pa?!” Kenan pushed off the tree and stood slightly.

“Just listen, son. All of that will happen in time. There will come a time. Maybe it’s a day of peace and everything is right. Or when your ears are so full of mud you can barely hear. You will make a choice. That decision will be vital. It will be so close to who you are. “ Tyris pushed off the bark and kneeled in front of his son. He placed both of his hands on Kenan’s shoulder. “It will be why you are a man. It will become a part of you and tie into your soul. It will be why you take another step, and then another.”

“Pa?”

“Whatever you decide. Keep it tight, clamp it down. It must be secret and safe. No one must know. Not your wife or your daughters. You might become as thick as stone with a mate. He can’t know. Not Dion either. You understand? Do you?”

“Y-yes, I get it.”

“Good. Good. The more you talk of a choice the less it becomes. Show your conviction through your actions. In your life, the only people to know, understand a part of you that no one else can. They will be your blood. Ken, you will tell your sons. And they, theirs. You understand?”

Kenan nodded. He didn’t know what welled up inside of him. Fear? It was something else. Worse. He pushed it back with all of his might. Like he had welled up a damn. It would hold. For now.

“Follow,” Tyris grunted. His head was shoved forward and he closed his eyes. Kenan was hesitant but followed. As soon as his skull touched his father’s. His conscience exploded.

“You have made the first choice in a line of important ones.” Kenan couldn’t comprehend what happened. There was a disconnect between his soul and mind. It was like he no longer needed or had a body. Instead, he was earth. Stone deposits were his limbs and lumps of ore made his organs. He swam through rock and dirt like a fish as he followed a vague amorphous ball of strength. “And soon. Too soon, you will have to make more.”

Kenan didn’t appreciate the emotion that hollowed its way through his body. It had a deeper punch than fear and felt like a sick dread. He tried to push it away. He dived deep into the depth, just behind the giant-like structure that was his father.

It gradually became dark. Like it was the void, but the sense of sight was betrayed by the heaviness that rested. It felt solid, old. Alive. It breathed and moved. While behind those emotions snuck in a loneliness and frailness too deeply rooted to properly conjure and then expel.

Some part of Kenan begged to question. He couldn’t. He didn’t think he had the strength.

The stone shifted. Giants formed and rock collected together to make a person. A kid. The child watched. Something horrid and wretched. The scene repeated. And again. Over and over. Earth rumbled as it radiated fear, hatred, and betrayal of love. Then the child grew into an adult. Into Tyris. Something changed. A choice had been made. “I had grown up fast because I had to. One day I decided. I wanted to be better than him. I needed to be a better man. I said to myself that I was going to be stronger than my father. I said it every single day.”

Kenan's mind cracked. His conscience ripped through the earth back to his body as it flipped back and forth. It wiggled and writhed at the revelation. Like it was electrocuted. Burned. His eyes were fired like coal and the wetness that flooded them didn’t have any effect to cool them. “You missed him?!” He tried to move but his father's hand made him stay, forced Kenan to look at him.

Tyris was still. His heart beat quickened and his mind bucked but his muscles stayed their hand. Something in his eyes tried to liquidate but they had dried long ago. At least for this topic. “Aye. I missed him. Even though his hands were used in a way that they shouldn’t have been. I loved my father. The parts that were to be loved. He cared in his ways, he was my pa. But…”

“Don’t you hate him?! Don’t you just want to? Just.” His hands balled into fists.

Tyris let go of his son's shoulders grabbed Kenan’s hands and held them up. “Anger son. That is why my father did what he did. We have a certain rage in our blood. It boils underneath. I decided I would be stone so that emotion would slide away. If you take one thing away from this talk. Understand to see what your emotions are, and know what you might feel is false. You are Kenan. My son.” Tyris pulled Kenan into a bear hug.

He shook. Two epiphanies hit at the same time. The first was his father was right. Anger did rise but the apex of that emotion shifted to a vexed grief. The second warmed his raw emotion. His father had faults, a silent temperament among other things. Despite that. He was iron.

"I know I could've been better. Be there just a little more. Doco has done a lot of things that I should've. Your mother had tried to pick up some of the slack where I left off. I was afraid that..." Tyris stopped. "You are my son. I am ashamed. I should've told you this more. I am proud of you. Proud of the man you'll become."