《Big Sneaky Barbarian》Ch. 119 - What the Buck?

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I was in shock, the sudden turn of events spinning my mind in a whirl of confusion and fear. But there was no time to dwell. I had to act.

But…all I could think about was the look on her face as she prepared to face the onslaught alone. She'd saved me.

Meanwhile, the sounds of vitriol raged on outside, a constant reminder of the warzone we'd just narrowly escaped. As I steadied myself against a stone pillar, I found my gaze drawn to the ornate engravings that adorned the temple's interior. There was something familiar about them, something strangely comforting amidst the chaos.

Happy! Hello! Welcome back! Slappy!

I was hit in the chest as four pink dodgeballs came crashing into me. I laughed, gathering up the roe in my arms in a huge.

“Howdy, guys. Miss me?”

I felt from their projected emotions that they had indeed.

“Aw,” I started. “I missed you, too, little buddies. Glad you’re safe.”

I lowered them to the ground and they began chittering excitedly amongst themselves, which was about the only time I couldn’t understand them. I heaved a sigh of relief and looked around the huge temple we’d made a temporary sanctuary.

The entire structure seemed to hum with an ancient, mystical energy that filled the air and pulsated beneath my feet. It was an odd juxtaposition to the bloody, frantic nightmare that waited outside, and for a moment, I found myself lost in its strange serenity. But I knew better than to get comfortable.

My gaze slowly lifted from the intricacies of the temple's floor, only to land on the multitude of wide-eyed, trembling faces filling up the cavernous space. The terrified villagers of Kettleborough, their expressions ranging from confusion to disbelief, cowered among the ancient stone pillars.

Chatter erupted as eyes landed on Buck, who was weaving through the crowd, checking on the villagers. I could hear whispers swirling around us, all of them about Buck.

"Buck is here..."

"Is that Buck...?"

"I thought he was..."

He seemed to be an almost mythical figure in these parts, an oni who invoked both fear and respect in the same breath. But there he was, just an ordinary guy, wearing a concerned look on his face, putting his efforts into ensuring everyone's safety.

I glanced around, spotting my other allies amidst the huddled mass of villagers. They looked just as disoriented and confused as the rest, but the sight of their familiar faces brought a wave of relief washing over me. We were alive, together, at least for now.

Rua's absence gnawed at me, but I knew better. She wasn't gone for good. The game mechanics would have her respawning in New Home, far away from the danger and chaos here. But that didn't ease the hollow feeling in my gut or the lump in my throat. It basically meant that she thought I could do more good here than she could—and that was a lot of confidence to have on my part. It made me uncomfortable. When had people started thinking of me as capable?

Drawing in a deep breath, I pushed those thoughts aside, focusing instead on the present situation. We were inside the temple, safe for now from the monstrous horde outside. But the uncertainty of what lay ahead was palpable. The fear and confusion in the eyes of the villagers was a reminder of the reality we were all trying to grapple with.

Every creak, every echo sent waves of fear rippling through the crowd. The villagers were terrified, and understandably so. They had been yanked from their peaceful lives and thrust into a nightmare. They needed reassurance, direction. Fortunately, I knew just the guy for the job.

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"Listen up!" I called out, stepping up to regard the assembly of frightened folk.

This was, apparently, the wrong thing to say.

Panic bubbled in the crowd like a seething cauldron. Something about my appearance, my voice, I dunno…triggered them? They started pointing, shouting, recoiling. Some huddled closer together, shielding their children, while others edged towards the temple's entrance, seeking an escape route.

Fuckin’ racists! All of you! I thought bitterly.

"Goddammit, I'm just..." I tried to interrupt, but my words were lost amidst the din.

Just as the crowd was reaching a fever pitch, a lazy, almost bored voice cut through the tumult.

"Alright, alright, settle down," Buck drawled, an exaggerated sigh following his words.

The villagers fell silent instantly, turning their attention to him. His nonchalance was palpable, and it seemed to seep into the crowd, slowly diffusing the tension. His reputation in these parts was a powerful tool, it seemed, and he wielded it with an effortless grace.

"Here's the thing," he continued, his hands tucked casually into his pockets. "We've got this handled. Just hole up in here and wait this out. This isn’t exactly my ideal scenario, but, apparently, I need to babysit."

Jeeze, his bedside manner needs some work.

His words hung in the air, leaving no room for argument. Buck wasn't asking; he was telling. And they fuckin’ listened. The immediate crisis was averted, but the atmosphere was still tense.

That's when it happened.

A shout rang out as thick mist began to curl around the pillars of the temple, swirling and twisting like living tendrils. The air turned cold, and the villagers gasped, stepping back as the mist concentrated at a single point. Fear gripped them again as they watched the spectacle, their eyes widening in horror. The murmurs began anew, their tones hushed and terrified.

But just as panic was about to take hold again, the mist suddenly coalesced into a solid figure. One we knew all too well.

Rua.

She was there, standing amidst the remnants of the mist, wearing the typical sojourner rebirth outfit—a light, airy, khaki-colored shirt and pants. The sudden appearance startled the villagers, but we, her comrades, rushed forward to greet her. A radiant smile spread across her face as she greeted us.

“What the fuck…?” I wondered. “How did you—”

“You set your Anchor to this temple?” Edwig asked, shock riddling his words.

“Well, uh, yeah,” Rua said with a shrug. “It seemed like, if things got really bad, as long as at least one person was still around to keep the villagers safe…well, that would be better than nothing, right?”

“When the fuck had you had time to do that?” I wondered.

“Oh,” she said. “I was the one who led the villagers in here in the first place, back before things got really bad. The idea struck me then, so I set my Anchor, and…voila.”

I shook my head.

“Well, goddamn, we have all got some catching up to do. But…well, I don’t know if this is the most opportune time, considering—”

“I’m Ileyrri,” said the newcomer to the crew, the pale woman who looked like she might be suffering from a touch of ‘being undead.’ “Pleasure to make your acquaintance. Nice flying, back there. Looked really impressive.”

“Oh. Thanks,” I said, taken aback by her forwardness. “I’m Loon, I’m these guys’ bud—”

“Quintham. Edwig Quintham!” the sloppy illisinaf said by way of introduction—literally his favorite goddamn thing on the earth. “Undermagister Researcher at—”

“Nobody cares, Edwig,” I interrupted him back. “Besides, you’re not really…that anymore, are you?”

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I turned to the woman who looked like she could punch a stop sign in half and smiled.

“Sorry,” I continued. “Eh…lay, rhhhi?”

I know I’d managed to butcher her name, and definitely sounded like a fuckin’ dipshit rolling my ‘r’s, but I wanted to try to pronounce it properly—you know, since it seemed like an opportune time.

“Nearly there. Ee. Layuh. Ree,” she pronounced, trilling the ‘r’ sound like a professional. I liked her accent, and though I didn’t know where it might be from, it sounded alluring to the ear. She didn’t seem offended by my moniker massacre, instead, she was smiling. “You the one who belongs to Rexen?”

“What?!” I shouted—on accident. “No! Absolutely not. I’m my own man!”

“My disciple is just being bashful,” Rexen said sweetly. “He’s definitely mine. Bought and paid for.”

“Nope!” I said, wheeling on Rexen. “Listen, you fuck—”

“So, did you live from having Rexen’s effigy ripped out of your body?” Dragoon asked. “We were wondering what happened to you.”

I paused, having to catch up with the comment considering I was a hundred kinds of super-riled because of Rexen…being probably more honest than I cared to admit.

“Well…yeah, I lived. It hurt like a motherfuck, though. Then I got sucked into the portal anyway, went through, but did not end up in Palandis. Oh boy. Oof. Got pooped out in a vampire's mansion, instead.”

“Vampires are real here?” Rua asked, but she sounded more amazed than horrified. Typical.

“Oh, yeah,” I said. “Though, I didn’t get the opportunity to meet our host. It probably won’t come up again. But I did rub shoulders with her way-too-hot-to-be-usual groundskeeper, or whatever. Oh, and Buck—Buck! Come over here and meet my homies!”

The big oni sighed and wandered through the crowd over to where we stood.

“Gang, this is Buck,” I said. “He’s who protected you during the…”

I stopped, looking at everyone else. Now that I had a moment to give ‘em the ol’ once-over it was clear I had overlooked something. Dragoon and Veruca were dressed much differently than the last time I saw them.

I had barely noticed the change earlier amidst all the chaos, but now it was impossible to ignore. Dragoon was sporting a set of ornate leather armor that I'd never seen before. The armor was a deep russet, rich and supple, and fashioned with complex patterns and symbols that stood out against the leather. They looked intricate, mystifying, lending an air of nobility to his already formidable appearance. A new crossbow, sleeker and more menacing than his old one, was strapped to his back. It had an ebony finish, and I could see the subtle gleam of enhanced runes etched into its surface.

Veruca's outfit was practically lavish next to Dragoon's practical ensemble. She was draped in flowing robes of an ethereal blue that seemed to ripple and shimmer under the temple's dim light. Lines of incomprehensible script were woven into the fabric, twisting and shifting in an endless dance of arcane knowledge. Resting atop her head was a jaunty little hat that, somehow, didn't seem out of place. It actually complemented her and was stuck snugly behind her horns.

My gaze then landed on Rua. Of course, now, she was in the sojourner leisure suit, but if I recalled correctly…she, too, had undergone a dramatic change. Hadn’t I seen her with a bright, royal blue cloak draped over her shoulders? Also, I was pretty sure she’d had the Behemoth Blade on her back before she was devoured to death, and a slimmer, more elegant blade had been in her hands…

As I took in their upgraded looks, I couldn't help but feel a pang of envy. I was still sporting the same old gear I'd been carrying around for what felt like forever. Looking at them, I couldn't help but wonder what adventures they'd been on, what foes they'd battled, and what treasures they'd uncovered.

It was clear that while we had been apart, they had been busy.

“What. The. Fuck?” I said. “Where did y’all get the sick threads?”

Everyone, at least, had the decency to look a bit bashful. However, before anyone could respond, there was a loud crash and boom, the whole temple shaking as something big, and probably halo-orbited, began slamming against the walls. This resulted in a lot more shrieks from the villagers, who were simply clinging on to one another and looking at us—or more specifically, at Buck.

“Shit,” I hissed.

“Ooh! Disciple,” Rexen said. “Do you think that’s the big one? I’ll bet he’s loaded with tasty treasures and shinies beyond reckoning!”

“Shh,” I hissed. “Fuck. Guys, it sounds like that thing’s going to break through pretty soon.”

I was having Crowmoon flashbacks, except ol’ Rafe could at least have some sort of dumb-as-a-doorknob conversation. I think. I wasn’t sure how the big, fat Chlamydius Prime would fare in that regard, but I didn’t have a ton of optimism.

As the clatter continued, the townsfolk became super agitated, screaming with each uproarious shake, the chlamydians trying their damndest to make it inside.

“What will we do?”

“...break the door down?”

“...doomed. Doomed.”

“Do you guys have anything left in reserve?” I asked my companions. Everyone shook their heads save for Edwig and the fighter chick.

“Well, that’s to be expected. You guys were fighting for what? Hours? That’s fuckin’ impressive. But, don’t worry about it. Edwig, Buck, and…”

I looked over at the pale woman with the glowing yellow eyes.

“...Ileyrri?”

She nodded.

“Yeah, we’ll take care of it,” I said, reaching to my waistband.

There was a sigh from behind me, and I turned to see Buck staring at the huge temple doors, looking more bothered than usual.

“No…” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

“No?” I wondered. “Buck, what’re you—”

“I’m going to do it,” he said, rolling his eyes. “It’s going to be a bother, but it can’t be helped.”

“What? No, dude. We’re going to help.”

“No,” he said again. “I am going to do it alone. The rest of you have other things you need to do, right?”

I thought about our true purpose in taking the portals. How had we gotten wrapped up in this?

“Right…” I said. “But, you’re not going to do it alone. Let at least one—”

“Nah,” he said. “I’ve got it.”

And with that, he turned towards one of the villagers, a smooth-featured elf who stood trembling near the temple doors.

“Open the door,” he ordered, his tone brooking no argument.

The elf, momentarily paralyzed, pointed at himself in surprise, as if questioning the reality of the command.

“Now…?” Buck said impatiently.

With a determined swagger, he moved towards the doors, his twin shields gleaming on his arms.

“What are you…you’re going out there alone?” I demanded.

In response, Buck merely shrugged, a mischievous smirk playing on his lips as he inclined his head towards the doors.

“It’ll just take a minute. Watch everyone while I’m gone, yeah? Don’t let anyone sneak out.”

“But, aren’t you just, like…a defensive specialist?” I countered, attempting to grasp his strategy. “What’s the move here, Buck?”

His smirk deepened as he gestured towards his shields.

“Sort of,” he said. “Not just that, though. I’ll be fine. Promise.”

He turned and nodded to the elf, who nervously returned the nod and lifted his hands, chanting under his breath. There was a loud clack as the doors unlocked and parted with a grind. When the opening was wide enough for him to pass through, he held a hand up to stop the elf from opening it further.

“Woah…” he said, as if speaking to a horse. Then he slipped through the gap. I couldn’t be sure, but I thought that as the door closed, I could see a flash of some kind of giant weapon on his back.

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