《Hodgepodge》Tournament 2
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Doreen looked at the work associated with being a tamer with a totem. She filled out
as much as she could. She had to turn it in, then take Tapper to the obstacle course.
He excelled at running through the training area because of his size and speed.
She felt hot breath at her elbow and looked down. She found Woody standing by her
work chair, looking at the papers. He put a paw on one of her answers and scratched
at it.
“So you don’t think this answer is right?,” asked Doreen. “What should it be then?”
Woody took the pencil in his mouth and wrote over her answer with his. He dropped
the pencil next to the work and looked at her.
“This looks different, but it could be right,” said Doreen. “How do you know about
this?”
Woody chuffed at her. He pawed the rest of the papers to check the answers. He
corrected two more. He wagged his tail when he was done.
“What are you?,” asked Doreen. “You’re not like any bonded servant I have ever
seen. I could almost believe you cheated at cards. You seem smart enough to try in
any case.”
Woody shook his head. He put a paw on the pencil. He grabbed it with his mouth. He
wrote NO CHEAT in the shakiest hand ever seen.
“So Errant is wrong?,” said Doreen.
Woody nodded his confirmation.
“All right,” said Doreen. She gathered Tapper up and put him on her shoulder. “Let’s
turn this in and see what Tapper can do on the obstacle course.”
They left the classroom after Doreen dropped her work in the tray the instructor used.
She led the way out of the building toward the obstacle course. It was a tower that
smaller totems had to traverse with a clock keeping time on the effort.
Woody looked at the various totems running the tower, climbing to the top. He settled
down to wait on Tapper’s effort. The squirrel should easily handle this with his liquid
body and general aptitude. He turned to gaze at a course set of for quadrapeds like
himself. He decided to excuse himself because of his age and disinterest in the
activity.
Errant could run and dodge if he wanted. His smarter partner was more than happy
to sit things out.
And if the Queen’s Knight really needed help, he was always happy to bite someone.
Doreen waited for the tower to clear of totems before she sent Tapper into the course.
She pushed the block to start the timer just before he crossed the line. He vanished
inside the tower.
She watched as he flashed upwards. His liquid body allowed him to leap across gaps
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too big for more solid animals. He reached the top and pressed the stop button on its
dais. He waved his paws in the air.
“Good job, Tapper,” said Doreen. “Come down and we can get dinner.”
The water squirrel slid down the outside of the tower, hopping when it reached an
outcropping of metal and wood to other similar spots. He dropped the last few feet
to the ground and splattered. He pulled himself back together as he bounded toward
his partner and guest.
“That was a pretty good time,” said Doreen. “We’ll have to practice a bit more before
we can reach the school record.”
He climbed up to her shoulder and patted her face. He made silent chattering motions.
“What about you, Woody?,” said Doreen. “Would you like to try the other courses?”
The dog looked at her. He shook his head. He was trying to take it easy. Running
around and trying to jump over walls and running across rope bridges was for lesser
beasts.
“All right,” said Doreen. “I think you should try it once and see if you would like it.”
Woody looked at her. He sneezed at her. She wasn’t tricking him into running around
some playground. He was taking it easy.
She smiled at his refusal. It wasn’t her job to get him into fighting shape. She
wondered what a fighting shape was for a wooden dog. She thought that maybe he
was full of blades that popped out when he needed them.
That wouldn’t be the strangest thing she had seen a totem do since she had arrived at
the Academy.
They entered the cafeteria for dinner. Flying totems crowded roosts on the high
ceiling. Different elements worked their way around at the tables. Doreen smiled
when she saw the partners getting along as she walked toward the line.
Sometimes duels broke out, but the staff quieted the hot heads quickly with their own
totems.
“All right,” said Doreen. “Find us a table while I get something to eat. Do you eat
food, Woody?”
The dog shook his head.
“All right,” said Doreen. “I am eating for me, and you two will just have to grab
something for yourselves on the way back to the dorm.”
“Did you get another totem, Doreen?,” asked her friend, Jessica Moon Above All
Others. Her totem, a tiger made out of rock, prowled behind her as the girls went
through the cafeteria line and got food.
“No,” said Doreen. “An acquaintance asked me to watch his dog while he took care
of some business. The dog wants to settle in one place, but his partner can’t for
whatever reason.”
“So he gave you a totem,” said Jessica.
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“I don’t think Woody is a totem,” said Doreen. “I don’t know enough to know how
a familiar is different from what we do, and his partner is vague on details.”
“How vague?,” asked the other girl.
“Hello, my name is Errant,” said Doreen, frowning at not getting the voice right. “I
would like to drop my wooden dog off with you because he is showing signs of not
wanting to travel for a bit and staying in one place will do him good. Be back in a
week. Cheerio and all that.”
“You have to be kidding,” said Jessica. She smiled, moving toward grinning.
“That is literally how he does things,” said Doreen. “He’ll tell you part of a thing, and
then switch to another thing, but afterwards you realize he didn’t tell you anything.”
“But he left his totem with you?,” said Jessica.
“Not a totem,” said Doreen. “A familiar. And he is strange too.”
“The familiar?,” said Jessica.
“Yes,” said Doreen. “Apparently he cheats at cards, or maybe they were both
cheating, but I’m not supposed to let him get anywhere near the school tournament.
And Woody takes exception to the complaint that he cheats.”
“You have to be kidding me,” said Jessica.
“Come talk to him,” said Doreen. “He’s been hanging out with Tapper and me. He
might want to deal with someone new.”
“Come on, Jaw,” said Jessica. “Let’s look at this wooden dog.”
The tiger butted against her before leading the way to the table. Tapper stood on the
table and waved his arms. No tigers allowed. Woody looked at the big cat from where
he lay on the floor, but didn’t move.
“Woody, this is Jessica and Jaw,” said Doreen. “I was telling them that you would be
staying with me for a bit. They have never seen a familiar before.”
Woody yawned. He wasn’t there to impress people he didn’t know. He was there to
lay around and hardly move while he looked at people around him.
Tapper waved his hands in the air. He chattered, spitting water in his excitement.
Then he dropped on Woody’s head and pointed into the air.
“He’s a super totem,” said Doreen.
Woody threw Tapper into the air with a shake of his head.
He just eyed the other totem. He was naturally inclined to chase cats, but he was
willing to let things go in the interest of peace.
He laid his head on his paws. He had dealt with a lot of fantastic animals and
monsters in his day. One more was not that serious to him.
He knew that Errant had dealt with a lot of menaces they had faced, but he had done
some things these kids would never consider having to do. Saving the world was like
that.
Beating up some kid’s pet just didn’t rank that high in his opinion.
He would if he had to. He wasn’t going to be pushed too far by some kid’s pet feeling
its oats.
He was the Queen’s Knight’s familiar. He was not to be tested by lesser creatures.
“Would you two like to play?,” asked Jessica.
Jaw meowed in agreement.
Woody shook his head. He wasn’t moving from his spot until he had to.
“I think Woody is taking a break,” said Doreen. “I think he’s too old to play around.”
Woody looked at her before putting his head down on his paws.
“Or he’s lazy,” said Doreen. She petted the wooden head.
The dog didn’t open his eyes. He could not be swayed by gadfly comments.
He should have learned to speak the language to express his discontent in a way that
others could understand.
Maybe that was something he could do while he waited for Errant to return. It would
be good to say things to others instead of letting his friend mischaracterize everything
like he did.
It was hard to defend oneself to people who didn’t speak the Queen’s Tongue like he
did.
“I think he would not be good in the tournament,” said Jessica. “I expect Jaw to take
first place with his awesome clawsome.”
“Is that what you are calling that?,” asked Doreen.
“It is awesome,” said Jessica. She rubbed her cat’s smooth hide as it sat beside her.
“I’m worried about Tapper,” said Doreen. “Woody has been showing him some
tricks, but I don’t know if that will be good enough against other totems.”
Tapper climbed on her shoulder and tapped her face.
“I know,” said Doreen. “You did great against Bernard and his friends. I just don’t
want to lose you if I don’t have to.”
Woody opened one eye. He lunged up to put both paws on the table. He looked
Doreen in the eye. He wrote TOURNAMENT in the table top in shaky letters with
a claw.
“Errant said not to let you enter,” said Doreen. “It would be irresponsible of me to let
you anywhere where you could get hurt.”
Woody barked.
“And I am not going to let you cheat so Tapper can win,” said Doreen. “He has to be
able to win on his own.”
“How do you know that’s what the bark meant?,” asked Jessica.
“I don’t,” said Doreen. “But I think Woody would cheat to let Tapper win after he
took out the competition. After all, he can’t be erased by the tournament council. It
doesn’t matter if he loses.”
Woody made a chuffing noise.
“And teaming up is considered cheating,” said Doreen. “Otherwise, I would ask
Jessica to allow Jaw to cover for Tapper since she is legally able to enter and is going
to be there already.”
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