《Lament of the Slave》Chapter 224: Roaring Match
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»Who - art - thou?« repeated the beast, its presence, unlike mine, bearing steadily on my shoulders.
Strangely enough, I found it easier to endure as opposed to the insistence and blathering of darkness-possessed beasts. This was merely pressure, nothing more, something I had experienced many times before and from more powerful beasts. Speaking of which, according to my instincts, this one was somewhere around level five hundred - below it, but close - still way stronger than I actually was.
Regardless, I was sick of listening to their prying lies.
»Didn’t I tell you to shut up?!« I growled at the top of my lungs so that the beast could hear me all the way on the other side of the Beast Pit, making my intent behind my words unmistakable.
“My ears,” Stella whimpered from her cage.
It took me a few heartbeats to realize that I was still holding her hands, that she was just inches away from me as I unleashed my beast presence in full force. The closest anyone had ever been.
“A-are you all right?” Stupid question; she obviously wasn’t. Her face was pale, her breathing ragged, and her hands shivered slightly in mine.
“I w-will, but an ample warning next time wouldn’t be a bad idea. I a-almost shit myself.”
“I’m so sorry, I . . .”
»Not me who thou were talking to.« A mighty growl swept through the Cages, further silencing the beasts who dared not speak after my outburst.
“Is it, you know - the darkness - again?” Stella asked on a growl.
Was it? I was getting a completely different vibe - it was hard to describe - from that beast. “I’m not sure . . . Stella, I’m terribly sorry,” I said as the consequences of what I had done began to sink in. There was no doubt that it wasn’t just the beasts that heard my roar and sensed my presence. I wasn’t so precise with the control to target only them. It no doubt hit the nearby tents. Not to mention the fact that there had to be some beast handlers in the vicinity, if not in the Cages themselves.
“It’s done. Don’t worry - you held out as long as you could. If anything, I’m pissed at myself for not being able to help you.”
“Seriously? I screwed up. I mean, our chances . . .”
“We’ll deal with it.” For her age, she sounded like a seasoned veteran who wasn’t fazed by anything, something I, the older one, could only envy. Well, I didn’t have to search long in my memory to find who she reminded me so much of, Rayden. She sure took after her hero.
“I should be the one asking if you’re all right, Korra. You’re sweating a lot, you know.”
“It’s the beast, its presence . . . wait, is it putting pressure on just me?”
“It seems so.”
“Fucker . . .”
»Leave me alone,« I snapped, pissed and envious of its control over its presence.
“Ouch. The warning, please,” Stella said, rubbing her ears.
»Then tell me who thou art.«
“Warning,” I said before roaring: »Why should I tell you that?«
»So I know who I’m talking to.«
Talking to this one sure was different. In this beast's voice, male’s voice, there was not the seductive sweetness of the darkness-dazed beasts, and its arrogance didn’t stem from superiority, but from believing it had the right to ask me.
»You tell me first.«
»Thou were the first to dare.«
I was what? Oh...oh, my presence. I was the rude one, at least by beast standards. Still, after what had just happened, I was hesitant to talk to any beast here. Underestimating whatever the ‘darkness’ was and thinking it would just give up could be a big mistake.
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Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling that this one was different, much wiser for the beast, though. At least his speech was easier on the ears. That didn’t stop me from being cautious. First, before I opened my trap, I swept my mind with [Indomitable Will], trying to make sure it didn’t have any shit that shouldn’t be there, chuckling at the idea that the skill reminded me of an antivirus for the PC, aching at the thought of what I’d lost.
The result? My mind was clean - as far as I could tell.
And so warning Stella, I roared: »Korra Grey.«
»Thee feel like a human, yet a beast thou art. Bearing a human name, thou art just as rude not saying it all.« Yeah, why would I reveal my full name when it basically said I was a Guardian? Undoubtedly there were some beast talkers here, eavesdropping on our shouting match between one end of the Cages and the other. »Rude - maybe. I’d say cautious and hope you understand.«
»That I do. I’m not as meddlesome as the darkness in one’s heart. I bear the name Rairok,« the beast said, the power of its name carrying even at such a distance. Unfortunately, I still wasn’t able to read into it, except to say that there was more to the name. Nevertheless, the fact that a beast with a level of less than five hundred had such a long name spoke volumes. After all, when I stumbled into Esulmor, Esudein, though a level 900 beast, bore only the name Esu. Same with Zeewet. Even she, Zeew at that time, was much more powerful than this beast.
I suppose in those turbulent times, it was easier to achieve something worthy of such recognition.
»Strong name.« The flattery I learned from Idleaf. »Good to know you, Rairok.«
»Same to you, Korra Grey. So, what-are-thou?«
»A cross between man and beast.«
»Not bred of them, though.«
»You’re talking about the beastmen, right?«
»Yes, that’s what humans call them.«
»Not the beasts?«
»To us, they are abominations, something that was never meant to be.« Well, that was harsher than I expected and rather unfair to the beastmen themselves. »It is not their fault that they were born.«
»I didn’t claim it was. I merely stated what they are, a race born of the anguish of humans and the deepest darkness of beasts.«
»I am not that different.«
»Yet thou fought off thy own dark yearnings and brought sense to our kin.«
Is that what I did? I thought I just got them to shut up. »You could have done the same.«
Seriously, while my presence - strong as it was - was akin to just a brief scream, his was like relentless pressure. So there was no doubt that if he had wanted to, he could have done the same and silenced the other beasts, his kin as he said, just as well, if not more easily, than I had.
»I find it pointless. Their minds are far too lost."
»To what?« It was worth a shot to get out of him what the ‘darkness’ actually was when Traiana, still not here, wasn’t willing to tell us.
»To their basic instincts. To their yearnings. To the whispers in their minds.«
Damn, another cryptic answer. »Who whispers to them? Who whispered to me? Who have I been talking to?«
Rairok fell silent.
“What’s going on, Korra? Are you done?” Stella asked, waiting patiently so far and not interfering in my beast conversation.
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“I asked Rairok, the beast, about the ‘darkness’ and the behavior of the other beasts.”
“And?”
“Don’t you hear?”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.” It looked like we were gonna get about as much out of him as Traiana.
“Then I think we can expect some people to show up very soon.”
She seemed to have come to the same conclusion I had. That the bastards were just waiting to see what would come out of my conversation with Rairok, to see if I - or he - would give anything away. There was just no way they couldn’t hear us.
»To thyself,« Rainrok spoke when I no longer expected him to do so.
‘Myself? I spoked to myself? What the fuck?’ »It wasn’t me talking; it was the other beasts - and whatever was controlling them.«
»Are thou sure?«
The hell I was. »I am.«
»Then I don’t know what to tell thou, Korra Grey.«
»Wait - what? Why?«
»Not sure if thou are as blind as the rest of our kin.«
»Ignorant - that’s what I am, not blind. I’m just trying to understand what I was facing here.«
»I told thou, thyself.«
»I didn’t control those beasts.«
»Thou did not.«
»Then, who or what did?« At this point, I no longer saw any reason to hide that I had no idea what the ‘darkness’ was. That must have been obvious to anyone listening in on our conversation.
»Thou art asking me to define something that simply can’t be. The closest answer I can give thou is that it’s something primal, more basic than instincts, something that ties us all.«
»Wait, so I have it in me?«
»Thou art not listening. If so, I wouldn’t be talking to you.«
‘Shit! That was close.’ I was about to panic that I hadn’t gotten rid of the ‘darkness’ and that it was actually quite impossible. After all, it was unthinkable - at least for me - to get rid of the instincts, so how could I do it with something more primal?
»I don’t understand.«
»That much is obvious. Not so much what thou art.«
And I thought we were past that. The meaning of his growl could not have been clearer: I’m not telling you shit until you tell me who you are. A rough translation that I reinterpreted for Stella, not quite sure if it was worth revealing more about myself, worth losing our chance to get out of here.
She looked around at the silent cages, the empty corridors between them. They were there somewhere, humans, knights, beast-talkers, listening, watching us, and we both knew it. Hence my reluctance to say more. I could screw things up even more. Though what that would entail, I dared not think.
The moment Stella looked at me, I knew what she was going to say. It was in her eyes - resignation to the fact that we would most likely be stuck here for another cycle. “I say go for it. But be damn sure this beast - Rairok or whatever - isn’t controlled by, you know what, that this isn’t just some kind of trick. I’d hate to see you lose it.”
I grinned back. “That makes two of us.”
Well? To say or not to say? Since I had dropped my beast presence, it was pretty safe to say that when it came to questions from the human side, they surely wouldn’t leave it at the curse version of how I got the mutations. That left me with the question of whether to trust Rairok - trust being perhaps too strong a word.
»Before I tell you what I am, how do I know I’m not talking to that shitty primal darkness or whatever it is?« I yelled across the Cages after warning Stella. »How can I be sure that you’re not trying to get me on your side, to pry my weaknesses out of me?«
The beast laughed. »Thou misunderstood. I’m not trying to pry thy weaknesses out of thee - only to satisfy my curiosity. Something I wouldn’t have to do if I were consumed by my primal self.«
Thinking back, when I was talking to the ‘darkness’ - meaning the beasts it controlled - it seemed to know a lot about me, things no one else should know.
»Also, I enjoy talking to someone who’s so fluent in our tongue. It’s dreadful to talk to humans.«
So many questions popped into my head. Was it only humans, or did dwarves and elves also butcher the beast tongue? How long had Rairok been here, and how did he get here? As I understood it, these cages were filled with beasts captured in battles, so . . .
It wasn’t my instincts but my guts that I eventually decided to trust and follow: »I was once a human. And it was a human who made me what I am. He was the one who injected the blood of beasts into my veins and made me suffer the consequences. I’m no longer human. Nor am I a beast. What I am is a hybrid of both.« I tried to put as much meaning and explanation into my growls as I could in an effort to make Rairok understand.
»Interesting. Yet despite what thou claim to be, I feel thee as one of my kin, more than any of the others here. Shame we cannot face each other.«
I wasn’t exactly keen on facing such powerful beasts like him, but to be honest, this long-distance talking was exhausting - quite damaging to my vocal cords, too - plus it would be nice to see who I’m actually dealing with. »It’s a shame . . . so this ‘darkness’ - this primordial thing, what it is?«
Rairok snarled, amused at my persistence. »I do not know what it is or where it comes from, except that it is primordial, ancient, hard to grasp. Just like our primordial roots, I guess. We all have them, human or beast, but none of us are able to reach them. Yet for that thing, it’s like a pathway to our inner selves.«
A shiver ran through my body. »So there’s no way to protect oneself against it?«
»Thou did, Korra Grey - so did I and many others.«
Right, so there was a way, and I just didn’t get it - again.
»It was trying to get into my head.«
»Yes, it did.«
»Why? When there’s the pathway?«
»That’s the right question. Because just as we are unable to reach our roots, it cannot reach us through them. All it can do is read into us and use us against ourselves.«
»Oh . . . that’s why you said I was facing myself.«
»It is what thou did.«
‘Damn, that was sick.’
That thing, that ‘darkness’ was out to use me against me, knowing all my longings, my regrets, weaknesses I didn’t even know about, much better than myself. I was really facing myself, my reflection, the worst in me.
»It saddens me to say how easy it is for weak or young beasts to succumb to its temptations. In that regard, humans have my envy.«
Honestly, I would have thought it would be the other way around. Humans were full of greed, spite, and jealousy. Something that could easily be turned against them.
»What’s so different about humans?« I know Traiana, still absent despite what was going on, said that the beasts were closer to their feral self as opposed to humans, but was that it?
»There is no sure answer that I can give thee. Some humans would tell thee that they are elevated enough to succumb to temptation. The more considered ones would say that people are so far removed from their roots that the thing cannot read their desires.«
»But that shouldn’t stop it from trying to take control of them.«
»And it doesn’t.«
»It doesn’t? Then why hasn’t it tried to reach my friend? She’s the human in the next cage.«
»The power of it here is limited. It can only act through those already controlled by it. The more of them, the more powerful it is, and there are not many of them here."
»Not many? But there are so many beasts here,« I argued. There must have been hundreds of them in the entire Cages.
»There are many more of them out there, and some of them are much stronger than the ones here.«
»More powerful than you?«
The beast laughed. »I may seem powerful to thee, but my kin are known more for their wisdom than their brawn. Nothing I’m too proud of now.«
Did I have to ask? I guess. »Why?«
»Because while I am able to resist, I am bound to watch as others are not.«
‘Shit!’ That did sound awful, and you could hear in his voice how much it pained him. Certainly not a topic to dig deeper into - my own experiences - I, too, had had some shit that I wasn’t comfortable talking about.
»But thou did; thou resisted. An interesting one, indeed, thou are. While thy beast side allowed it to see into thee, thy human side allowed thee to resist it. Don’t get me wrong, being human is no guarantee; much depends on one’s will, and thy is mighty.«
If I understood correctly, people could be swayed by the darkness, something I was under the impression was unheard of.
»What happens to those whose will is weak? Humans, I mean.«
“Their brains get fried,” came a gruff male voice from around the corner of the cages as a man in a knight’s uniform stepped out, and not alone.
That son of a bitch almost gave me a heart attack, not that it mattered; I would heal. Still, it pissed me off. If only because I squealed like a little girl. I knew they were out there, listening, just not that close. Sure, they were out of reach of my domain, but I damn sure should be able to hear them, their breathing, the rustle of their clothes, just something.
Magic, I suppose - or magic tools.
»Ah, impatient ones - it’s not just humans who suffer from this shortcoming,« Rairok grumbled. His perception being more impressive than I thought, he was clearly aware of the intrusion of humans. »Our conversation seems to have come to an end. It was certainly - though unexpected - an enjoyable one. Thank thee, Korra Grey. I hope thy will doesn’t fail thee and we get another chance to - talk.«
»Me too Rairok, me too.«
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