[THE HAVEN]

Beads of salty sweat dribbled across Coder Joe’s chin, leaking across his cheeks and littering his lips. He spat on a brutoid bobble-head; it nodded in satisfaction. Both of his eyes narrowed at Zydan’s super-sized monitor:

Above, large text read World Reset Script.

Below, small text read:

…00:21

…00:20

…00:19

Coder Joe focused. Zero distractions. Zero relent. All his experience came flooding back to him. Those tireless nights in the office. Weeks of banging his head against a single problem. His few futile years of education. All of it mattered now. Each keystroke proved critical.

No time to think.

Barely time to blink.

React.

Act!

…00:13

…00:12

…00:11

Just a few more lines of code.

Numbers and letters between brackets –

Closed off with semicolons.

…00:08

…00:07

…00:06

Three taps of the Enter key.

Two clicks of the mouse.

One stroke of the spacebar.

…00:05

…00:04

And –

…00:03

…00:02

Done!

00:02

Coder Joe exhaled an orgasmic sigh of relief, falling back into Zydan’s glossy gamer chair. Deadlines didn’t come much deader than that. How he longed to celebrate this victory. Let out a big hollering hoot that would have made him feel awkward, even with no one else around. But emotions were tricky for Coder Joe, especially when it came to expressing them. He settled on a lackluster “woo” and a gentle rotation of his fist in the air.

He’d done it. Done the near-impossible. That’s why he was lead engineer! Hell, he was a goddamn hero. They’d ought to promote him after this. To what though? He was already lead. Maybe Senior Lead Programmer? Or Principle Director of Engineering –

“Well done, Coder Joe,” said a voice behind him.

Coder Joe froze. That voice sounded just like –

“Zydan?” asked Coder Joe.

“Indeed.”

Dark circles under Zydan’s eyes eclipsed his full moon cheeks. His smell was nauseating as if five unshowered mini-Zydan’s crawled into his mouth and slowly starved to death. Stains coated his black cloak: red bloody stains, gray soaked sweat, and a questionable brown blotch.

“Commendable job shutting that down,” said Zydan. “I would have done it myself, but I was running behind. Such a bad day to be late for work.”

Coder Joe stood, kicking Zydan’s expensive gamer chair into a cubicle wall.

“Look, you asshole,” said Coder Joe. “Do you have any idea what you almost just did? You could have destroyed everything. You went too far. You’re not going to get away with it this time.”

“And who’s going to stop me?” asked Zydan. “You?”

“I should lock you out of your own computer,” said Coder Joe. “Remove your dev access –”

“You won’t though,” said Zydan.

Zydan pointed upwards.

Coder Joe

“I’ve been here a while,” said Zydan. “That’s been here a while too.”

Coder Joe’s beat face turned beet red.

“Zydan, wait,” said Coder Joe. “Look, I won’t do anything. I’ll let you go.”

“Indeed you will,” said Zydan. “Forgive me Coder Joe, but it’s best no one knows I was here.”

Coder Joe

“Look, I won’t say a word, Zydan,” said Coder Joe. “Not one word.”

“Indeed you won’t,” said Zydan.

Coder Joe

“Z-Zydan,” said Coder Joe. “Wait. L-Look, we’re friends, right?”

“The best of friends,” said Zydan. “But I really need to make some better friends.”

Coder Joe

Coder Joe became Exploder Joe.

Zydan wiped red matter from anything that mattered, settling back into his deluxe gaming chair. That familiar ass-groove greeted him, kept nice and warm by the late Coder Joe. A forty four degrees breeze sailed across his face from a neighboring AC - just the right temperature. It was so good to be back in the office!

This would have to be his last day of work however. And if he was retiring, he’d take a few things as severance.

He ducked below his desk, reaching – then retching. It still stank like hobo-Zydan down there. Astonishing what the nose could get used to. His first priority was stealing his hard drive, but a close second was taking a nice long shower.

“Zydan!”

That voice –

That familiar infuriating voice! Where was it coming from? A hallway? Or a cubicle?

No, it was too muffled. It must be –

“Zydan!” yelled the voice.

It blared from his headset, sparked by some buried tab on his monitor. There was only one tab it could be. And only one voice –

“Zydan,” said the voice. “Get your punk ass down here.”

Zydan maximized over a dozen windows, resurrecting a buried Zero Space display –

There stood Shae, as purple and pretentious as ever. Both cross and cross-armed, standing at the base of Stone Tower, throwing his voice as high as possible.

“Zydan, you piece of shit,” shouted Shae. “I know you’re up there. We need to talk! Right fucking now!”

Zydan smirked. He was far above Shae now, both figuratively and literally. There was no need to engage. Shae’s quest was over and Zydan was over it.

His finger descended towards the power button –

But then, he stopped.

There was still time before those enforcers caught up. And what better way to spend it than ridiculing Shae? He’d earned it after his great escape. How satisfying it would be to add some insult to Shae’s many injuries.

Zydan plopped on his headset –

[ZERO SPACE]

Zydan’s six blue brutoid eyes peeked at Shae from the peak of Stone Tower. It was meters down, but Zydan’s view was telescopic, his intelligence celestial, and his power astronomical. Shae seemed like a mere insect from here; Zydan was quite certain he could crush him like one.

“What do you want, Shae?” asked Zydan.

“I want into your stupid tower!” said Shae. “I checked in with my team. We did it. We killed the fucking wizards. The whole world’s still here. And no thanks to you! You and your stupid negligence caused all this! You could have killed everybody in the Haven!”

“Indeed, and you stopped it!” said Zydan. “Congratulations! You beat the game!”

“I didn’t beat the game until I beat your ass!” said Shae. “So let me in and get ready for a pounding!”

Zydan chuckled in surround sound.

“I have no desire to be pounded by you,” said Zydan. “I don’t see why I’d let you in.”

“Because you have to!” said Shae. “Don’t be a douche. I just saved the whole fucking Haven. My whole team did. Let me in, god damn it. Let me finish the game!”

Zydan grinned with a mouthful of pristine brutoid teeth.

“I’m afraid there’s no finishing this game,” said Zydan. “I’m no longer obligated to fulfill my designer duties. I’ve resigned from the role, effective immediately.”

Shae gaped and gasped.

“Oh hell yeah,” said Shae. “Fuck you then! I’ll fight the next designer in line!”

“No one will be taking my place,” said Zydan. “After a few last preparations, I’ll seal this place off permanently. The game will be unwinnable. But don’t fret, Shae. It’s really about the journey, not the destination –”

“Oh fuck you, god damn it,” said Shae. “I know what you’re guarding up there. The Blue Path. I want in!”

Zydan harrumphed.

“There simply isn’t room for the both of us, Shae,” said Zydan. “Only one person can become a god. And I’m not interested in unfriendly competition.”

Zydan shook his big blue head.

“Think of the Blue Path as a beacon,” said Zydan. “Someone out there made it. They’re waiting, calling out for a hero. I can feel their desperation. It’s a cry for help, and only a god like me could respond.”

“You’re not a god, Zydan,” said Shae. “You’re barely a designer!”

Shae slapped his chest with a gun.

“Let me through!” said Shae. “I’ll save this fucking world. I’ll save everything! I’ll save everyone! My friends. And my, uh… m-my brother. Even your sorry ass. You know I can do it. You really want to help people? Then you let me through!”

Zydan grinned.

“Like all great designers, there’s no changing my mind,” said Zydan. “Those in power make the rules. And I make rules that give me power!”

Zydan saluted Shae with three arms.

“When I’m god, I’ll erect a tiny monument for you,” said Zydan. “I’ll place it in a small field where no one will see it. The brave Shae who thought he could compete in a game rigged against him. Idiot. Sorry, but I must be off.”

“Wait,” shouted Shae. “No, fuck you Zydan! Come on, don’t do this! Play fair! You cheater! You lousy excuse for a designer!”

Zydan turned away.

“You coward!”

Zydan paused, grimacing.

“Hiding behind your rules, and dev privileges,” shouted Shae. “You’re afraid of me! What do you think a pitiful player like me could do against some sort of god like you? Not even going to show me your high and mighty power? Some designer! Yeah, you made the rules. So fucking follow them! Weakling!”

“Weakling?” shouted Zydan. “I am not a weakling!”

“Prove it, fucker!” shouted Shae. “Give me one taste of that almighty power you say you have. Lemme see what a designer can do! You, versus my team. The way it’s meant to be. The way you designed it!”

Zydan gritted his teeth. He didn’t have time to get pushed around by pathetic players. But he certainly had power. More power than Shae could ever know. In fact, maybe he wanted Shae to know. One final display of strength before saying his Zero Space goodbyes. Such a satisfying conclusion that would be. Petty revenge on the one pathetic player that ever dared rise against him.

Zydan grinned wide and wicked. A smile ripe with years of cruelty inflicted by him, and upon him. This would be a revenge for the ages, against all those message board delinquents and keyboard warriors that criticized him. Revenge for every piece of hate mail. And the incessant lack of fan mail. One final coup de gras against all those disparaging words from his father and discouraging whispers from the dev team.

Zydan was the greatest designer.

The greatest designer of all time.

Once he went through the Blue Path, he’d be a new man, for better and for worse. No more bad-ass brutoid. No more dev abilities. Just a fresh face with a whole new set of premium powers. There was still time to give this brutoid body one last ride. A final exhilarating set piece to close out the show.

“Alright, Shae,” said Zydan. “I’ll grant you that humiliating defeat that you so desperately deserve.”

Shae stiffened, violet jacket flowing in the forest wind.

Zydan cleared his throat.

“You’ll have one chance,” said Zydan. “One final fight, as you desire. Should you win, you and your team may travel through the Blue Path.”

Zydan gestured him away with two hands.

“Now go back to your guildhall and rest,” said Zydan. “Meet me back here in eight hours. Make sure you bring sixteen players.”

Shae nodded.

“A’ight,” said Shae.

Shae turned to leave –

“Oh, and Shae,” said Zydan. “There’s one more thing.”

Shae grimaced, turning back.

“This is the final battle,” said Zydan. “And as such, the stakes must be proportional.”

Zydan grinned.

“If anyone dies during this battle,” said Zydan. “Their character will be deleted. Permanently.”

Shae froze.

Zydan beamed.

“They’ll remain alive in the Haven, of course,” said Zydan. “But I suppose for some, that’s a fate worse than death. This is an ID ban. Once a character is deleted, it may never be remade. And the deleted player may never play again.”

Zydan watched the color and enthusiasm drain from Shae’s face.

“Good luck convincing your sixteen teammates to accept those terms,” said Zydan. “If you’re not here in eight hours, I’ll assume you backed out. Don’t be late –”

[THE HAVEN]

Zydan’s headset ascended.

He thrashed in his seat –

“What?” shrieked Zydan. “Who dares?”

A pair of red gloves held the headset into the air. Attached to those gloves was a matching red suit and a crimson top hat, nestled above an immaculate handlebar mustache.

“Cleaver Craig?” asked Zydan.

“Good afternoon, Zydan!” said Cleaver Craig.

“Why the hell is your assassin-ass here?” asked Zydan.

“Exactly why you’d expect!” said Cleaver Craig. “I still have orders from your father after all!”

A metallic box unfolded before Cleaver Craig, spawning tripod legs and a massive mini-gun maw.

Zydan collapsed back into his chair.

“W-Wait, stop,” said Zydan. “C-Craig, you can’t kill me like that. It won’t work.”

“I know!” said Cleaver Craig. “You’re a premium, just like me!”

Cleaver Craig eyed the glowing green computer beneath Zydan’s desk.

“But Premiums become mortal if you destroy their computer,” said Cleaver Craig. “That’s a fun fact I bet you already knew!”

Cleaver Craig unfurled his mustache.

“I remembered your computer isn’t in your room,” said Cleaver Craig. “So I had a brilliant revelation: it must be on the dev floor!”

Cleaver Craig tapped his noggin.

“It can be pretty tricky to get up here,” said Cleaver Craig. “But with all the chaos in the Haven, this seemed like the perfect opportunity. Such a nice surprise running into you too!”

“I-I admire your dedication,” Zydan muttered.

“I admire you too, Zydan!” said Cleaver Craig. “Now, would you mind pulling your computer so I can blast it? I’d hate to ruin all those pretty figurines on your desk –”

“Stop,” said Zydan.

“You know I can’t do that Zydan,” said Cleaver Craig.

Zydan grinned.

“You already have.”

Cleaver Craig shrugged, then pulled the trigger –

He stopped.

“W-Wait,” said Cleaver Craig “I can’t move!”

“Of course you can’t,” said Zydan.

Zydan gestured towards a glowing green ring surrounding Cleaver Craig’s feet like a failed hula hoop.

“This is one of my new abilities,” said Zydan. “Alignment Shift. You’re as docile as a friendly NPC. As obedient too. Wave to me.”

Cleaver Craig waved to him.

“Touch yourself.”

Cleaver Craig touched his nose.

“Slap your face.”

Cleaver Craig did not slap his face.

“Ah yes,” said Zydan. “I can’t make you hurt yourself. That’s the one limitation.”

“Very cool, Zydan!” said Cleaver Craig. “But even paralyzing powers can be broken by other abilities. RAPID SHOT!!”

Nothing happened.

“How odd,” said Cleaver Craig. “I used a level two. It should have canceled yours.”

“You can only counter abilities of the same level or below,” said Zydan. “Mine’s a level three.”

Zydan grinned.

“I’m not taking any chances with you,” said Zydan. “A level three should last quite a while.”

“Very impressive, Zydan!” said Cleaver Craig. “You always were my favorite target. What will you do to me then? Kill me, I presume? Maybe a spot of torture?”

“Not yet,” said Zydan. “I need to get my computer out of here. Stand guard. Kill anyone that comes near.”

“Of course, Zydan!” said Cleaver Craig. “I don’t typically work for free, but I guess I don’t have much choice this time.”

Zydan rolled his eyes, rolling his shiny leather chair out of the way. Beneath his desk was the key to his power - his computer and more importantly, the hard drive within. There was already a quaint little sanctuary on floor forty one awaiting his arrival. Once there, he could plug this bad boy in and finish his business with Shae. But first, a nice long shower —

RAPPA RAPPA RAPPA

Zydan tensed -

Cleaver Craig’s mini-gun unleashed nearly a thousand bullets in the blink of a bullseye.

Someone drew too close.

But who?

“Oh no,” said Cleaver Craig. “That’s bad. That’s very very bad.”

Zydan glanced back –

DD curled up on the ground, nearly a dozen bullet holes in each limb, red blood flowing out of his formal gray suit.

“Father?” asked Zydan. “No. Craig, what did you do?”

“Exactly what you told me to do,” said Cleaver Craig.

Zydan shoved past Cleaver Craig, kneeling at his father’s side.

“Father,” said Zydan. “What are you doing here?”

DD gasped, grasping Zydan’s shoulder.

“I-I came to save –” DD stuttered. “S-Save the Haven. W-With my overpowered dev character.”

Zydan held his father in his arms.

“Well that was idiotic,” said Zydan. “I thought you were in a safe room?”

“Huh,” said DD. “I-I suppose, I thought you were too.”

Zydan scowled, shaking his father’s body.

“This isn’t happening,” said Zydan.

“Huh,” said DD. “I suppose it is. It was inevitable at this point.”

DD reached up, holding his son’s pale face.

“Zydan,” said DD. “I-I never wanted this. I-I just wanted to protect you. I wanted to protect the people in the Haven.”

“I-I never wanted this either, father,” said Zydan.

DD clenched Zydan’s wrist.

“I-I’m sorry,” said DD. “I-I was a terrible father.”

Zydan’s lips curled.

“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” said Zydan.

“You did your best, Zydan,” said DD. “I suppose I did my best too.”

“No, you weren’t supposed to die like this,” said Zydan. “I had the perfect plan. Just a little poison, and you’d disappear quietly.”

DD hushed.

Zydan released his father, pacing back and forth.

“You’ve made this situation so complicated!” said Zydan. “Enforcers will be everywhere now. It’s going to be impossible to leave the Haven. Such a pain in my side!”

DD scowled.

“Huh,” said DD. “I’m sorry my death is such an inconvenience for you.”

“Indeed,” said Zydan. “I had a grand plan, father. A grand plan!”

DD fumbled with his suit pocket, taking hold of an oversized pen.

Zydan paced furiously.

“I was just a few hours away from taking revenge on that idiot Shae, then going through the Blue Path,” said Zydan. “Everything was perfect, but then you had to interrupt it all. You’re always ruining things for me!”

DD pointed the pen at Zydan, tip first.

“Huh,” said DD. “I suppose things don’t always go as planned, Zydan –”

CLICK

Nothing happened.

DD blinked, peering at the pen.

“Yes,” muttered DD. “Things don’t always go as planned, indeed.”

“What is that huge pen, father?” asked Zydan. “Writing your will?”

“I suppose so,” said DD. “It must be all out of ‘ink.’ Never trust an enemy to save your life. I never should have trusted V.”

The pen fell from DD’s fingers, his head sinking against the floor.

“I failed you Zydan,” said DD. “I failed everyone.”

DD’s eyes dilated.

“May the gods help us all.”

DD grew still.

“Indeed, I will father,” said Zydan. “That’s the plan.”

Angry voices bounded across cubicle walls. Enforcers. And lots of them. They’d finally caught up with Zydan. It was time to move. And it had to be the right move too.

Zydan shoveled his hard drive into his pocket. People would be looking for DD’s killer. Enforcers. Haven leadership. Vigilantes. Fanatics. They would track Zydan down, even between Havens. They’d find him eventually and if he was lucky, they’d kill him quickly –

“Gee Zydan, this sure is a pickle!” said Cleaver Craig, still stationary. “If it makes you feel better, I believe your father’s soul is still watching us. Just like a spectator in Zero Space.”

“I certainly hope not –” Zydan began.

Zydan paused, turning towards Cleaver Craig with a devious grin.

“Craig,” said Zydan. “You will do one last thing for me.”

“Sure thing, Zydan!” said Cleaver Craig. “I’m honestly surprised your power’s still going –”

“Stop talking,” said Zydan. “You will stand there and wait for enforcers to come. When they arrive, you will confess to DD’s murder. Tell no one you saw me here.”

Cleaver Craig’s eyes opened wide. He attempted to object, but his lips remained sealed.

“You’ll be tortured, probably,” said Zydan. “Then they’re going to come for your whole wretched assassin guild.”

Cleaver Craig squirmed, but his body remained still and solitary.

“When they finally kill you, your soul can watch me make a new world,” said Zydan. “I’ll make a brand new Hell. You and the other Cleavers can join my father there.”

Cleaver Craig’s muffled yells grew desperate.

“Farewell, Cleaver Craig,” said Zydan. “Make sure to tell the enforcers where your computer is. I wouldn’t want you respawning.”

Zydan abandoned the squirming squeaking Cleaver Craig, fleeing through cubicle corridors as a dozen enforcer shadows spread across the dev floor.