The giant crab-like monstrosity formed of fused human skeletons scuttled blindly through the underground graveyard. It clicked and snapped its claws destroying everything it came into contact with.

“Hey over here help me out” a muffled voice called out.

The crab followed what sounded like trapped hands beating to free themselves from something. It was against the rubble of a collapsed tower. The claws descended to rip and tear up the terrain searching like a backhoe. The first dig turned over nothing, except an old box spring mattress.

“No over here you dummy.. That thumping is my legs kicking underneath something separate” yelled Ned the undead wizard.

The monster slowly rotated itself high over the dead head babbling away below it. A little of the neck and shoulders remained of Ned, but everything else had been cleaved off by King Edward.

A set of skulls attached on the underside of the monster laughed in his face. One of the claws smashed into the ground digging up a kicking leg it immediately discarded. While the monster's six legs worked overtime to crawl to a higher section of the ruble the claw latched onto Ned’s exposed entrails. He was flung into space among the crabs' many skull faces. The dead wizard's entrails began to fuse to the spines of hundreds while his eyes were the only ones aboard. The crab easily adjusted itself onto a section of the fallen tower forming a ramp. It waltzed across the graveyard and climbed the outer wall.

Close to this two knights had gazed at the horror. They stood in a grave dug to head height for Vito. Mooseman was fumbling with his shotgun in the direction of danger.

“Well I don’t see any way to destroy that thing, or stay alive regardless” he sighed.

“I believe you’ve said that many times already, and about many things. I’m not giving up” said Vito, holstering his revolver.

“I suppose it’s best to remain silent and remember all the good times of my life before here and while I still have the opportunity,” said Mooseman, climbing from the hole.

He lowered his hand to the knight that ignored him. Vito kicked at the dirt trying to get a foot attached. He dusted himself off, and shook dirt from out of a boot, then trousers. They began walking along a fence of sharp iron points above. Along the thick metal ran fine working of roses, and rivets.

“Before the crab returns let's try and find ourselves somewhere it can’t fit, or climb” said Vito.

“Quick thinking buddy, no point moping about the inevitable, let's try and find safety just as fast as you thought of it” said Mooseman, slapping Vito’s back in encouragement.

They began jogging in a graveyard that appeared frozen.

The massive underground cavern had a hole in the ceiling letting in black and white moonlight. A ceiling also coated in crystal deposits that sparkled. Outside of the cemetery a cliff edge leading to a void of nothingness, a seldom used path, and a gnarly tree long dead. A layer of frost coated everything here including a scattered array of well worn coffins. They had previously been tossed out from a speeding hearse. The wind moaned blowing from somewhere unknown, as the crab could be heard approaching. The coffin most stuck began to thrash wedged in a rock pile. The claw latched onto, and yanked apart the splintering wood to reveal a skeleton dressed in Elven plot armor. Nancy was no longer imprisoned.

“Wow Ned you look awful” she cackled, falling onto the gravel.

“And how would you know blind witch?” he retorted.

“I’ve found a pair of fresh eyes while I was trapped here,” she said.

The monster turned its six legs, to look behind. A zombie bird was watching, planted on a corpse's crows feet, eating the eyeballs. The zombie crow had growths where the resurrection crystal impaled its rapidly dwindling feathers. It flew away to settle at a safer distance watching from the top of the mangled skunk spruce.

“Huh you really are an old bird” said Ned.

Nancy nodded, dusting off what she could observe from above of her armor, and bones. The crow flew into the smaller cave next door.. She spotted the broken windows, matches, and other signs of her ex boyfriend.

“He’s down in that cave kill him Ned” she yelled, while pointing towards the cliff that dropped to the void.

“I think you mean the tunnel over in the other direction where your eyes, and beak have just flown,” replied Ned.

“Yes, Go kill him gently so he can finally join me forever in death” sighed Nancy. “Don’t ruin his features”.

She propped herself on the tree and could feel the giant crab moving away. She cackled as the crow flew deeper into the factory. The crab knocked out the partially broken window, and it climbed inside to disappear among boxes in the next room.

King Edward’s hook was stuck grinding onto an air rail. He traveled at high speed through warehouse after warehouse while dodging obstacles. He had to stop this thing before being splattered like paint is in an overpriced art. A large square type face plastered sign warned “Objects May Fall Wear Hard Hat”.

The rail had traveled along the factory floor, now it was climbing towards the ceiling. Edward glanced at his feet soaring many meters above an industrial maze. He was over what looked to be a skate park, and wondered why they would build something like that in such a drab place. The sitting tanks of green acid, and the vats of pink labeled “mystery flavor” revealed it to be something else.

The speeding man tilted his head back as the track took a sharp bank turn. He swung far sideways narrowly avoiding the massive no smoking bolted to the ceiling. A light fixture threatened to catch the sparking rip cord attached to the flying hook, and his stump of an arm. He grabbed the key stuck in his other arm, and began winding himself closer to the hook. The air rail creaked as the hook had slowed near the summit. He saw the drop approaching. It was too late.

“Aaaaaa” cried Edward, diving straight down like a roller coaster.

The stacked boxes flew by his feet, and wind peeled back his face full of sparks from his hook. A sign on the floor read “worker’s quarters”. The rail, and surrounding factory was getting more, and more covered in rust. A section of ceiling had dissolved, letting water drip from somewhere.

Edward spotted the flooded tunnel seconds before he plunged into it. The impact of the belly flop rang his royal armor underwater. The rail continued dry overhead, whipping him through a school of small fish below it. The area had opened into a large underwater cavern full of floating orbs clustered everywhere in positions to spawn. It also looked to be home to many plants and algae bloomed and large tarps of kelp were growing .

Bubbles escaped out of the spinning man surrounded by swimming creatures that wrapped him like sushi in what tasted like a plastic tarp. The webbed flippers grabbed at him from everywhere.

Edward kicked to fight off the attacker but the hook stuck his arm in an awkward situation. Thrashing like an infant he was being carried throughout the water. The wires connecting to the hook were coiling around his body. His vision was dimming, and the lack of air was slowly putting him down. The King of humanity was struggling for freedom a final time putting all his effort into breaking out. It was in vain to begin to feel himself joining the dead. Whatever hung to him swam at a steady pace until he gasped for air above the water's surface.

“Arg” gasped Edward swinging his free hand. “Let’s fight then fish attacker” he finished, looking around madly.

He was torn at the arm round, and round. Now he was disarmed, and wrapped in a coil of his own appliance.

“What is the meaning of all this injustice that had befallen me ever since I acted for once out of not my self interest” he cried bobbing with the egg sacks.

Inside them dozens of amphibious bodies were taking form.

“Hmm wait a second..” said Edward, bobbing underwater. He spit out coughing into a hysterical barking seal like noises of hardened vocals before being sucked back under. He was face to face with three Bootlickers. Their green skin was covered in warts, they had gills, and their eyes were fishy. Edward raged at them thrashing bubbles they swam for cover. He kicked upwards with full force splashing, coughing, and struggling like a fish out of water. This surface area was a small pocket of air with nothing to stand on but the water.

“Get back here at once and communicate or fight me cowards” he bellowed belligerently. “Ugh” he huffed, then sighed, and finally took a deep breath before plunging underneath.

His previous movements struggling had kicked around the tiny forms of aquatic life making vision blurry. He could still see a grouping of eggs floating besides him. The edges of the sacks were transparent while Inside the darkened centers things were beginning to move. Edward shuddered wrapped in his own chains slowly rotating in kelp. It was time to rise again for air. He found himself again with the three familiar fish staring at him. They grabbed onto him gently forcing him to surface.

“Pfft” said the king, spitting out water, as the fishy three stuck their heads up around him.

“This is you guys' operation?” he asked.

The toady fish remained silently staring.

“Ahh unsophisticated members of this species, You know the ones I’m friends with speak,” sighed Edward. “If only I could get some help instead of everything in the planet's center being fucking hostile” he finished.

The wadding fish in front of him didn’t blink, however it opened its toothless mouth.

“You will have to excuse this treatment as we aren’t normally, except when it comes to guarding our species spawn before they hatch, and we expire” said the fish floating in front of him.

“Yeah sorry fellas, but I’m not trying to have a feast of roe here. You see I was just heading through the area trying to find the exit” said Edward.

“This is where we hatch, while that factory is where most of us work” said another fishy voice behind.

“Except us three here our work is guarding the next round of workers before they hatch for the next seasonal period of labor” said the third.

“So anyway, how about untangling me?” said Edward, flashing his best crooked smile.

“No can do. We can’t risk the safety of our spawn” said the Bootlicker directly in front of him.

“So you're drowning me then?” said Edward.

“Of course not,” the three cried unanimously.

“We are a peaceful species that has recognized our place in the pecking order” said the one in the center.

“Ahh haha” chuckled Edward “You must be working for the Elves I should have known”.

“You guess wrong, but regardless we will feed you and give you life support for the rest of your natural lifespan ” said the other to the side. “That will be our distant ancestors giving you a factory standard funeral. You have already met the master of this facility, and it isn’t organic” said the past behind his back.

“The mainframe computer!” Screamed Edward.

“Yes” said they said together.

The King stopped struggling. If the computer doesn’t want him to leave, outsmarting it, and accomplishing an escape will be virtually impossible. The difficulty level was auto loss unless he found an great many exploits”

“I really wish my hook that was just shooting sparks would have just electrocuted everything in this filthy pond” hissed Edward.

“The reason it didn’t is precisely because we do our other job of maintaining our workers quarters filtration system controlled by the synthetic master who knows best” said one fish.

“Well this place looks filthier than a penguin exhibit so I remain skeptical” said Edward.

He heard splashing from his back, and side. The one fish in front of him remained above the surface, staring.Soon there was plashing as the other two returned in front with him carrying objects.

“Want to take a closer whiff of these fake props we use to make the quarters more natural” said the fish who remained empty handed.

On the other hand the objects held included a plant in his hand, and fungal growth in the other. The last fish held a painted wooden stage prop of an underwater shrub, and bit onto a fake sea cucumber.

“Here take a bit to see for yourself that they have been manufactured” said the fish shoving the plant in his face.

Edward raged here harder than he ever had before. A King was letting himself be dominated by Bootlickers. All of a sudden the fish looked scared, and dropped their objects.

“What’s that moving fast below the surface?” cried one in alarm.

A black streak shot underneath their feet, and past exploding into the air pocket. A pop as a dead crow hit the ceiling and fell to the water to float. Edwards feeble jailers had fled. He looked down with apathy at the rotting floater. Stuck covered except for a few small holes in a kelp cocoon wrapped with many layers of hook coil constricted like a snake. The dead bird lay lifeless stuck full of zombie crystals floating among the plastic theater props. The beak began to slowly twist from where it had been stuck in place looking underwater. It snapped 180 degrees with a crack to lock eyes beady red on him. The bird saw something it didn’t like smacking the King with a wing. After being hit with a winged attack Edward also started thrashing.

Underwater those not imprisoned ran for their lives. A giant creature tore in pursuit through the roe. The claws descended on their prey, while the crab’s swimmerets worked overtime to catch. The slowest of the three Bootlickers found themselves grabbed, and compacted by a giant spiny claw. The crab's other snapper snipped the cable connecting a King’s stump to a precious modified cutting weapon.

“Nobody gets the hook now ha ha” said Ned, head of the monster.

Unhooked Edward spun towards the rocky bottom. He was still struggling to break free of being coiled. He smacked into the river rock only for it to squeak and cushion the impact. He wriggled his vision becoming increasingly vignetted. Nearby Ned ate an egg as the crab smashed, and destroyed the hard work of the fish.

“Where is our Eddy boy at?” he said, as a claw snapped.

Two detached parts of a leaking body floated to the surface clouding the water darker monochrome. The crab brushed it away in looking for it's prize while the prey swam to live in different directions. Edward panicked past a filter sucking in water, grabbing the nearby ledge pull himself out of it's suction. The ground dropped out from underneath him leaving an abyss for the liquid. Edward did a double take. At the deepest section of the area he thought he could see a massive stopper cork attached to chain in the drain. Edward was going to gamble diving downwards with limited oxygen remaining. He was going drain this fish tank, and it's killer seafood along with it, or die trying.