Pablo Rosas never thought he would leave Paso Robles. He was trapped there, brainwashed by a cult of wine moms determined to keep their city’s image pristine and proper. For years that remained the case. It only took his utter humiliation at the hands of one pink-haired cretin to finally break his grip on the place. That, and the entire city burning down at the hands of rebels.

It was nice to see, in retrospect. An oppressive regime being overthrown by its captors. If only the same thing could be done with the system using overlords who had taken over the entirety of America in such a short period of time.

While Pablo never thought he would leave Paso Robles, he CERTAINLY never thought he would leave his own universe.

However, that is what’s happening right now as he and his bouncy female companion step through the Multiversal Portal Generator.

“Been a long time since I went through one of these,” The Goddess says. “Usually I’m the one sending people through them.”

Right, her name is apparently “The Goddess.” She is, in fact, a deity who controls life and the reincarnation system of this multiverse cluster. Was a deity, until she was killed and reincarnated as a half-human on Earth. Or so she says. Pablo is not convinced at all that she is not just some impressive fraudster who has tricked her way into gaining the trust of the Systemless Squad.

She may look like an air-headed do-gooder, but she has a fierce heart within her, that much he can tell. If it is a traitorous heart, in fact, he will be ready to subdue her with all his might.

“Okay,” The Goddess says. “Here we gooooooooooooooo!”

They step through—

And now...

Flashes.

Black and blue.

Swirls and bursts of light and sound.

And then...

Darkness.

Lit up with gigantic glowing mushrooms in the distance. Night time.

Pablo taps his foot. Metal. Sniffs. Rust. Seawater. Damp air.

“We’re here,” he says.

“And how!” The Goddess shouts, beckoning to this grand plane before them.

They are currently high up in the sky, on a large, slowly moving structure. Behind them are a large number of buildings, lit with extremely dim lights that look greatly unimpressive compared to the mushrooms off by the mountains. There’s a few more of these walking cities following theirs, so it must be part of a caravan of sorts.

“The Mortal Rim,” Pablo says. “A land of danger and adventure.”

“I love this place,” The Goddess says. “I put a lot of care and thought into coming up with the kaiju designs here. They’re darn scary!”

“Why?”

She tilts her head to the side. “What do you mean?”

“Why did you design this world to have such fearsome creatures that would viciously kill intelligent life?”

“Uh, because it’s cool? I dunno. It’s the cycle of life and all that. Doggie dog world.”

“Why not create a place where all beings can live in harmony and grow to old age together?” Pablo asks. “Why must it always be about killing and action?”

The Goddess looks puzzled by this. “I was... told to? I guess? It was in my programming directives to make some cool-ass worlds.”

“Told to by who?”

“Hmm... I ain’t quite sure,” The Goddess says. “You’re a real smartykins. Compliments your good looks.”

Pablo blushes and tries to push away the compliment. He is not used to getting those, especially from a woman.

Suddenly, a spotlight shines down on them, and several armed soldiers approach, guns drawn.

“Freeze!” a deep voice shouts. “Identify yourselves!”

“My name is The Goddess, and this hunk of stuff next to me’s Pablo Rosas. We come in peace! Also I’m your deity. Worship me and all that.”

“We recognize no deities, of the flesh or of the spirit,” another voice booms. The spotlight is too bright for Pablo to make out any faces. “How did you get on our walker?”

“Multiversal Portal Generator,” The Goddess says. “We come from another universe, and we’re here to ask for your health.”

At this, the spotlight switches off. Nearby lights brighten from their once-dim state.

An older man with a thick, well-trimmed gray beard and an eyepatch walks up to us. He must be the leader of this place, Pablo realizes.

“Name’s Griffin,” he says. “General Griffin. You must be with the other soldiers, I figure?”

“Other soldiers?” Pablo asks.

The Goddess looks at him with eyes that make him realize that he shouldn’t have spoken before her. She takes the lead. “We come alone. Just us two.”

“So you’re not with the U.S.?”

“Oh, great, they’re here already?” she whines.

General Griffin nods. “Arrived about a week ago. They offered to help us in exchange for some amount of resources. Paying tribute and all that. They’ll give us weapons, and we’ll send them information on our world’s magic system.”

“Crap. They’re really doing that. You didn’t say yes, did you? The U.S. is bad news.”

He shakes his head. “Hell no. They didn’t help us with the real problem, and so far they still haven’t done anything. We gave them one of our lesser walkers to set up an embassy to follow us around. Has a landing strip and a barracks and that’s about it. They sure won’t get our loyalty, though. We in the Mortal Rim are an independent people.”

“Yeah, go get ‘em!” The Goddess exclaims. “Now, wanna help us defeat the U.S.?”

“Did you hear a thing I said?” General Griffin asks.

“Come on! They’re the big evil empire, and we’re the scrappy resourceful rebels.”

“They haven’t helped us with our big problem, and you haven’t done squat either. We don’t care about sides, and until one of you multiverse groups actually solves our big problem, we aren’t giving you anything.”

“But we can definitely solve your big problems. Yep, for sure.”

“Prove it, then,” he says.

In an incredibly well-timed move, just as he says that, there is a rumbling in the ground. Footsteps from off in the distance of the mountains.

“I’m concerned,” Pablo says.

“Oh yeah, that’s probably a kaiju,” The Goddess says. “I guess ‘big problem’ is literal in this case.”

“Very much so,” General Griffin says. The lights on the walker shoot up to maximum brightness. Their nighttime camouflage was not effective, anyway. “Man your stations, everyone!”

The kaiju stomps towards the walker caravan and roars.