It was over two hours before Ixxy finally returned.

Timothy had spent almost the entire time either with his nose in one of the thick tomes that he’d brought with him or busy scribbling carefully on sheets of paper in tiny, neat handwriting that gave Rita a tinge of jealousy. Back in school, she’d always gotten in trouble due of her sloppy penmanship.

The rest of the group had whiled away the time with a deck of playing cards.

Gora had broken out a pack of cards from somewhere and tried to teach Rita a few of this world’s card games with Samual’s begrudging and somewhat stilted help. While the games themselves were fairly simple, with one being not too dissimilar from Rummy and another being very similar to Poker, both games that Rita had at least a passing knowledge of, if not in-depth expertise, it was the deck of cards itself that she found the most fascinating.

There were fifty cards, arranged in five suits of ten each, numbered one to ten. There were also four ‘jokers’, one for each suit but one, for fifty-four cards total. Their function differed depending on the game, but usually functioned as something like wildcards. The suits themselves were apparently not fixed, and could traditionally be any five related but distinct concepts that the maker chose.

Gora’s pack had the theme of five ‘nations’: New Azeron, Orden, Syphernia, Tudom and Baraxia.

The last one, Baraxia, was apparently the part of the world that they were in, where Grailmane and the Holy Mitlan State were located. It encompassed everything this side of the Grailspine Mountains, up to the coast, as well as quite a large area on the other side of the mountains as well.

The interesting part, however, was that each numbered card was also a ‘face’ card, with beautifully detailed imagery adorning most of the front of each card. From swans to towers to abstract concepts like ‘repetition’, each artwork came in five flavours, one for each suit.

Rita spent more time staring at the beautiful art than listening to the rules of whatever game Gora was trying to teach her, much to the latter’s irritation.

You would think that with beautiful, uniquely hand-painted imagery like that, the deck would be worth a fortune, but no. According to Gora, you could buy one in the local market for one or two of the silvery coins. Apparently, there were a few different tronics out there that could duplicate or generate art in some manner, and playing cards were a commonly produced item, being relatively cheap to manufacture apart from the imagery.

Gora was in the process of explaining the rules of a game called ‘Dinnikiarta’ or something for the third time when a knock on the door made Rita’s heart begin racing. Suddenly, all of the nervousness that had been pushed to the back of her mind while she’d been staring at the pretty card-art came rushing back to the forefront of her brain.

It was time to let a stranger stick their fingers in her soul.

“Tell Timothy his directions sucked,” were the first words out of Ixxy’s mouth the moment Gora opened the door.

“Hello to you too. I see you figured out how to dress yourself this time,” Gora replied, looking Ixxy up and down. She took in her tight, ragged-edged tank top and almost indecently short pair of shorts. “Barely.”

“Cute. Now do we have a deal, Butch?”

“What if I said no?” Gora rumbled menacingly, leaning against the door.

“If it was a no, you would have told me to fuck off already,” Ixxy grinned, patting Gora on her stomach and ducking under her arm before she could react.

Rita had to suppress the urge to leap to her feet as Ixxy strolled inside, planted her hands on her hips and gave Rita an absolutely radiant smile.

“There’s my favourite spider-girl!” Ixxy beamed, but Gora’s massive, meaty hand engulfed her shoulder.

“Cuz, you still busy?” Gora rumbled, keeping a firm grip of the now scowling devil.

“Uh… maybe ten minutes?” Timothy called back from the the far corner of the room, where he was still hunched over a stack of papers.

“Right. Then you wait outside,” Gora said and firmly began dragging the irate demon back towards the door.

“Wait!” Ixxy protested. “I want to talk to Rita!”

“You can talk after the contract’s ready,” Gora replied coldly.

“But I have questions!” Ixxy complained. “And so does Rita, I bet! Isn’t that right, Rita? Don’t you want to know what happened?”

“Gora, wait,” Rita called back. “She’s right. I do want to talk to her. I have… I do have questions.”

It was true. She did have questions. A lot of them, and it seemed that if she wanted answers, it was going to have to come from a demon. And while she could wait until the contract was signed and everything, Ixxy was here now and seemingly just as eager to talk.

Reluctantly, Gora sighed and let go of Ixxy. She’d already had her dragged halfway out the door, but Ixxy shook herself off and stepped inside again, heading straight for Rita’s table. This time, she took a seat opposite Rita.

“She’s just going to lie to you, Rita,” Gora grumbled, walking over and looming menacingly over the pretty demoness’s shoulder.

“As if!” Ixxy protested, glaring up at Gora. “I’ll prove it to you!”

She flicked her wrist and touched her fingers to the table, and suddenly a sheet of paper appeared in a puff of sulpherous flame flame.

“There,” she said, twirling it around and pushing it towards Rita. “This way you know I’m not lying.”

Rita reached for the contract that Ixxy had summoned, curious about what the deal was, but Gora hurriedly scooped it up first.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing” Gora snarled, holding the single sheet of paper at arm’s length, like it was a snake that was going to bite her.

“Relax, Grumpy. That one won’t be costing anyone anything,” Ixxy said. “It’s just to put your minds at ease that I’m not up to no good.”

“Contracts from you are the very definition of ‘up to no good,’” Gora growled. “Nobody’s signing anything!”

Ixxy rolled her eyes. “Run it past your contract mage if you don’t trust me,” she replied, waving her hand towards where Timothy was still hunched over a stack of papers, pen in hand.

“He’s busy,” Gora stated flatly.

“Gora, please,” Rita begged. “Can I at least see what she’s offering? I won’t sign. I don’t even have a pen here.”

“Just a little game, kind of,” Ixxy explained as Gora begrudgingly handed the summoned contract off to Rita, a look of distaste on her face. “We take turns asking questions. We don’t have to answer, but we’re not allowed to lie. So I’m forced to be truthful.”

“We don’t have to answer? Then what stops either of us from just refusing to answer every question?” Rita asked, scanning the contract.

“Because our turns aren’t over until we get an answer,” Ixxy replied, grinning. “You can refuse to answer my question, but then I get to ask another instead. And vice versa.”

“But if we do answer, it has to be the truth?” Rita asked, confirming.

“Exactly.”

“What’s this bit about forming part of another contract…?” Rita asked, pointing at the section near the top.

“Uh, let me see that,” Timothy interrupted, having gotten up from his work and ambled over, before snatching the contract out of Rita’s hands. “Ah, yes, I wouldn’t worry about that, bit,” he said as he began reading. “That’s just part of my arrangement with Ixxy. It’s why I can negotiate such a good deal. It has no bearing on you.”

“’Arrangement’, huh?” Gora asked sceptically.

“Gora, I told you, that’s why I work with Ixxy. We have an existing working relationship.”

“Yeah, plus your ‘Cuz’ is an absolute demon in the sack!” Ixxy added, a shit-eating grin smeared across her face.

“Ixxy!” Timothy exclaimed, aghast.

“What?” she responded, shrugging. “We haven’t signed anything yet! I can still lie.” Then she leaned over to Gora and stage whispered, loudly enough for everyone to hear: “He’s actually terrible.”

“I swear, we haven’t done anything!” Timothy protested, looking around the group, but Gora just waved him down.

“Yeah, yeah, chill, Cuz. For the first time I actually believe you. It’s pretty obvious she’s just trying to stir up trouble.”

“So if I tried to say something that was a lie…?” Rita interjected, returning the focus to the contract in Timothy’s hand.

“Then the contract would just enter a broken state,” Timothy answered. “Contracts can’t actually compel action for us mortal folk. Demons are different, but that’s because they allow themselves to be bound to the city’s contract magic directly as part of being allowed to enter.”

“And what happens if the contract enters a broken state? What does it cost me?” Rita asked.

Ixxy shrugged. “Nothing. If you lie or refuse to answer any further questions then the game stops and I go wait outside until you’re all ready for me.”

“That’s it?” Rita asked suspiciously.

“Yeah, that’s it,” Ixxy replied, nodding. “This is just a bit of harmless fun while we wait for Timothy to finish getting things ready for us.”

Rita turned to Timothy. “What do you think?”

Timothy sighed and scratched his head. “While obviously I’d prefer if you didn’t sign anything you didn’t have to, this seems pretty harmless. There’s no mention of payment or anything. It’s exactly as she said.”

“My payment will be the answers to my questions,” Ixxy replied airily. “Just so we’re clear on what I’m getting out of this.”

“Rita, I really don’t think this is a good idea,” Gora opined. “Demons are tricky fuckers…”

“I want to ask the first question,” Rita interrupted, staring intently at Ixxy. “If you agree to that, you’ve got a deal.”

Gora leaned in close to Rita, her eyes glaring daggers at the demoness across the table from her.

“This is a bad idea, Rita. Wait for Timothy…”

“Gora, I’m going to have to sign a contract that allows her write access to my soul,” Rita replied, equally quietly. “If I can’t do this relatively harmless contract, I have no business going for anything more serious, don’t you agree?”

“I don’t think you should make any kind of deal…” Gora tried again, but Rita waved her off.

“This is my decision,” she said with uncharacteristic firmness. “Now, do we have a deal? Will you let me ask the first question?” she asked, turning to Ixxy.

Ixxy stared back at her, thoughtfully sucking on her teeth. “Theoretically, you could refuse to answer any of my questions and just immediately end the game the moment it is my turn to ask,” she said. “Thereby getting a single answer for absolutely free.”

“I could,” Rita agreed. “But you set up the contract. This could all be a trap. Personally, I think I’m taking the greater risk here, considering what you are and what’s at stake for each of us, don’t you agree?”

After a few moments thinking it over, Ixxy shrugged. “Fair enough, I suppose. Can’t argue with that logic.” Then she tapped a finger to the contract now lying between them and Rita watched as some of the words writhed around on the paper, reshaping themselves to the new requirements. “I was just going to have us flip a coin or something to keep things interesting, but you have a deal.”

After a last, final check and confirmation from Timothy that everything seemed to be above-board, they both signed.

It might have just been her imagination, but it almost felt like there was the tiniest feeling of… something the moment she put pen to paper. Something squirmy. She had a brief moment of panic, thinking she may have perhaps made a mistake, but the feeling was but a momentary tingle, gone before she could even fully process it.

Hopefully, it hadn’t been the herald of anything ominous.

“So,” Ixxy grinned as she slid the contract off to the side. “What’s your first question gonna be?”

“Do you intend to use this game, this contract or any of my answers to harm me in any way?”

Ixxy blinked at Rita, caught a little off-guard. “Wow. Not what I’d have expected for your first question,” she chuckled.

“Answer the question or the game’s over,” Rita stated coldly.

“Calm down, I’m just saying you’re sneakier than I gave you credit for.”

She’d underestimated Rita. From her previous interaction, she’d assumed her a bit of a ditzy dimwit, but now she was seeing a far more focused side of the spidery woman. Wonderful. This was going to be fun.

Not that this particular question was any sort of trouble, she was going to have to be a bit more careful going forward.

“No,” Ixxy answered truthfully. “This game is purely for my own amusement. I was being honest with it’s purpose, before. I mean you no harm by it and I’m not trying to trick you.”

This was the truth. This contract had been a spur of the moment thing, something to get these paranoid buffoons to let her have some innocent fun. It was completely irrelevant to her plans, except for the fact that Rita might be less amenable to answering questions after everything was said and done.

“Now my turn?” she asked, and Rita nodded.

Ixxy took a deep breath, eying the other woman carefully.

“I’m going to ask you the same question I asked you last time we saw each other. What are you?”

“I’m…” Rita started, before her eyes flicked to Gora, who was leaning against a nearby chair, and seemingly changed her mind. “Pass.”

“Pass?” Ixxy asked, surprised.

“I choose not to answer this question,” Rita clarified. “Ask another.”

Huh. And here Ixxy thought she was starting with the easy ones. But that meant she had reason to hide what she was. Interesting.

“Fine,” she said, shrugging. “Let’s try a different topic. Were you present inside your soul? When I was digging around in there, trying to diagnose your little problem?”

“Yes,” Rita replied, after a few moments’ hesitation.

“Listen, if you only answer the absolute minimum, I’m going to do the same,” Ixxy chided her. “And that’s going to make this a very boring game for both of us. So how about we both give a bit more than that, hmm?”

Rita swallowed nervously, but then continued nevertheless. “Yes. I was in there. I saw you. Though I didn’t know that it was my soul. I thought it was just some kind of… mental space. Finding you there was a surprise, to say the least.”

“How is this possible?” Ixxy asked, her eyes narrowing. “Mortals can’t enter their own souls, it… doesn’t make any sense. It’s like a bag that contains itself.”

Rita just shrugged. “Look, don’t ask me. I have no idea. Like I said, I didn’t even know it was my soul. Now, if I’m not mistaken, that was two questions.”

“I’m afraid the game doesn’t work like that. You answered of your own volition,” Ixxy smirked. “That’s not my problem. If it’s any consolation, you weren’t bound to be truthful on that second response. And your answer was kinda shit.”

Rita frowned. “And if I refuse to play along until I get a second question?”

“We could stop here, but it’s your turn to ask,” Ixxy said, shrugging. “Your call.”

Ixxy watched as Rita tapped her fingers on the table, deliberating between eating the mistake or stopping their game.

In the end, she seemed to decide that little slip up of hers wasn’t worth bailing out for.

“Do you intend to harm me in any way with any future dealings we might have?” she asked for her second question and Ixxy had to forcibly school her face to prevent any kind of reaction.

This was the question she’d been fearing, but after Rita’s first question, she’d been mentally preparing herself for it. She had an out all planned out.

“Yes,” she replied, and Rita’s eyes widened.

Then she leaned forwards in her chair and looked Rita right in the eye. “I don’t have a choice. I am going to have to cause you at least a little bit of pain in order to fix you. There’s no way around that. But I have no intention of harming you any more than is necessary to fix your… whatever is wrong with you.”

Again, this was the truth. Mostly. If you defined ‘Rita’ as her soul, which was not an unreasonable definition, considering limbs and body parts could be amputated without diminishing the person involved, then Ixxy had no intention of harming her. She fully intended to steal the soul whole and intact, and study it very, very carefully without causing any damage to it in any way. At no point did she intend to harm it whatsoever.

Even her debt with Mulder and Heath very much paled in comparison to the opportunity of a new, never-before-seen kind of soul and she’d happily spend a thousand years in debt for a chance to study such a thing.

The distinction was razor-thin, but that was all she needed.

“That’s a relief to hear,” Rita replied, a faint smile playing over her lips and for just a moment, Ixxy had the rare urge to come clean to the foolish girl. Just for a moment, however. Then she squashed that fleeting urge and readied herself for her next question.

“Why did you attack me inside your soul?” Ixxy asked. “You know I was just trying to figure out what was wrong with you.”

“Oh, that,” Rita replied, sheepishly brushing her hand through her hair. “Like I said, I was kinda surprised and didn’t realize that that place was my soul. I felt something tickling sort of inside me and when I went to check it out, there you were. Except you looked like a cockroach, so…”

“A cockroach?” Ixxy repeated, aghast, but Rita held up her finger.

“Nuh-uh. We’re not doing this again. You had your question, now it’s my turn. Why do you want my soul?”

Ixxy froze. Did Rita know? Had she slipped up? Obviously she was going to have to pass the question, but doing so would be akin to confirming that she had designs on Rita’s soul.

“Uh, I’m not exactly sure what you mean there? Could you perhaps explain the question a bit?” she tried to buy herself time to think.

“It’s not complicated. Why do you trade for souls instead of, I don’t know, money? Or favours? Or whatever else? Why souls? Surely you’re not just trying to be edgy?”

Inwardly, Ixxy breathed a sigh of relief. Too close. She was still going to have to be careful about answering the question, but at least she didn’t risk compromising everything.

“I see. Well, on a personal level, I find myself with a spot of debt that I need to pay off. Debt measured in souls,” Ixxy explained, noticing how Timothy’s eyes widened ever so slightly at the admission.

So he hadn’t told them? Interesting. Ixxy had assumed that since they were friends, he’d spill all her secrets. That was partly why she’d decided to reveal it rather than just pass the question.

The other reason was to attempt to put Rita more at ease. Something had clearly happened in the space between when they’d last talked and now to make her a hell of a lot more paranoid, and revealing some weakness might help ease her mind and convince her that little old Ixxy wasn’t a big, scary monster after all.

Plus it got her a another question, so that was nice.

“Who could you possibly owe souls to?” Rita asked, looking confused.

“Actually, it’s my turn now,” Ixxy replied. “But also pass. That’s my business, not yours. So think of your next question so long. Now, what did you mean I looked like a cockroach in your soul?”

“Exactly what I said,” Rita replied calmly. “You looked like a cockroach. Well, almost. You had too many legs and eyes and some weird antennae-things…”

“No, that can’t be right,” Ixxy interrupted, frowning. “I’d manifested as myself in that place. I remember it clearly. Heck, I had to shapeshift my hands into claws just to be able to crawl around the spiderwebs.”

“Well, I’m telling you that you looked like a cockroach and that’s why I freaked, and since it was my soul I think my opinion is the one that counts, thank you very much,” Rita stated, then did a double take. “Wait, what do you mean ‘spiderwebs?’ My soul didn’t have spiderwebs!”

“What do I mean spiderwebs? The whole place was nothing but spiderwebs!” Ixxy exclaimed. “It was literally webbing from one side to the other!”

“No…?” Rita spoke slowly. “It’s white, but there aren’t any webs…”

“Then what do you see when you look at your soul space?” Ixxy demanded.

“Just… white. Like, featureless, smooth white… stuff. Like the place was one giant marble tile? I don’t know. It’s a little odd.”

How was this possible? Was Rita incapable of properly perceiving her own soul? Did she perceive that space through some kind of filter? Or was it Ixxy that couldn’t properly perceive it? Or maybe that place didn’t have an objective truth and consisted entirely out of the perception of those inside it? Hmm.

“Anyway,” Rita piped up, “I think I’ve figured out my next question. May I?”

“Go ahead,” Ixxy agreed, still mulling over Rita’s answers.

“What’s hell like? Or erm… the Abyss, or wherever it is that you’re from?” Rita asked.

“Pass,” Ixxy replied immediately.

“What? Seriously? Why?” Rita demanded.

“Because your language doesn’t have the words to describe it and your brain lacks the ability to conceptualize it even if I somehow could. And I can’t be arsed to try. It’s also not relevant to literally anything, so I’m not going to bother. But that was your question, if I am not mistaken…?”

“Wait, no that wasn’t…” Rita tried, but Ixxy just stared at her, eyebrows raised questioningly and a smug grin on her face. “Okay, fine. You got me. Again. Your turn.”

Ixxy cleared her throat. “I want you to describe exactly what you saw and experienced inside your soul, from the moment I entered to the moment I left. Leave nothing out.”

“Hey! That’s not fair!” Rita complained. “That’s not a question!”

“I could rephrase it as a question, if you want?” Ixxy insisted. “But it would be very long, very tedious and hard to parse. So can we just skip to the part where you answer it?”

“No, we can’t,” Rita stated. “And if you try, I’m simply going to pass. So either break it up into smaller, more easily digestible questions or ask something else. Also, that was your question. So now it’s my turn.”

Ixxy opened her mouth to argue… only to shut it again and remain silent.

Touche.

“Why do Demons need souls? Not just you personally, but demons in general. What do you use them for?” Rita asked.

“Pass,” Ixxy responded quietly.

“Fine. What’s the relationship between you and Timothy? And the truth this time.”

Off to the side, Timothy nearly choked on his own tongue.

“Timothy? Oh, he summoned me as part of a final year project.” Out of the corner of her eye, Ixxy saw Gora give the young man a dirty look. “In fact, I am still under contract with him, which is why I am here.”

“Keep going…” Rita prodded, but Timothy himself stepped up.

“I think that’s quite enough,” he interrupted them. “The contract is done and ready for final negotiations.”

“Hold on,” Ixxy said, holding up her palm to him, “I still get another question. Since Rita started, it’s only fair.”

Rita snorted. “Fair? You tricked me out of like half my questions.”

“And you tricked me out of one of mine, so clearly trickery went both ways,” Ixxy argued. “So as I said, fair.”

“Rita?” Timothy asked.

“Okay, fine,” Rita eventually relented. “Ask. But I’m not promising I’ll answer. Or tell the truth, since we’re done with this.”

“That’s fine,” Ixxy agreed. “I think just your reaction to the question will be plenty interesting all on its own.”

Then she leaned forward, looking Rita right in the eyes.

“Why do you want to save your friend?”

“P… pass.”

Ixxy stared Rita in the eyes for a few moments longer, until she began to feel like a deer in the headlights, before finally relenting with a shrug.

“Fine.” Then she turned to Timothy. “Contract’s done you say? Let me have a look.”

While Ixxy and Timothy went through the details of the contract, Rita just sat there, staring at nothing as her mind whirled.

Why did she care so much about Alice?

Right after she’d woken up, Alice had literally been the only person she could talk to. Her only friend and the only being who it seemed wasn’t trying to kill her. Sure, she and Alice was sort of the same person, in a way, but that didn’t matter. Alice had been a lifeline, at a time when she had nowhere else to turn and nobody else to turn to.

Despite all of that, however, she had in truth barely known Alice for a couple of days in total. And also her entire life, in a way, but that was just because Alice had cribbed hers. It didn’t really count.

She’d known Gora and Samual for a few weeks now, yet she doubted she would have gone this far for either of them. Sure, she liked them and all, and if anything happened to either of them she would be devastated. But if saving their lives required traveling to some dystopian hellhole and making a Faustian bargain with a literal demon? She wasn’t sure she’d be willing to go that far. Friends were friends, but that would simply be asking too much.

Why then, was she so willing to do this for Alice? Was it because Alice was a part of her? Because saving Alice was kind of like saving a part of herself?

No, she concluded. That was just pop-psychology bullshit. She didn’t see Alice as merely an extension of herself. While they shared memories from before waking up in this world, they had separate sets of memories since and completely different personalities. They were, in every way that mattered, two separate people.

But if that was the case, why was she so focused on her? There were so many other things that needed to be done! She needed to figure out some way to earn a living of her own. She needed to find her feet and get settled. And she needed to figure out a way of satisfying this gnawing hunger in her gut that no amount of green veggies and steak was filling!

Really, what she needed was to stop mooching on Samual. While being the High Priest of the God of Slaughter and Carnage came with a lot of perks, a salary wasn’t one of them, apparently. He was currently paying for everything out of his own pocket and from the carefully concealed grimaces on his face whenever they had to pay for groceries, he was either very stingy or did not have very much saved up.

But perhaps that was the problem. Since, there was so much that needed to be done and she had no idea where to start, she was simply focusing on the one thing she had a vague notion how to accomplish. Saving Alice.

So in a twisted kind of way, saving Alice was really just a form of procrastination. An excuse not to do something else more productive.

Did that mean she didn’t care about Alice? Of course not! The truth was she owed her life to Alice, not least because she’d protected her from flipping out due to the Nightmare Tree’s crazy rage-signal thing. But more than that, she’d also kept her alive during a time when Rita had been too overwhelmed and paralyzed in terror at the sheer enormity of the world that she’d so unceremoniously been dumped into to deal with herself.

In those early days, Alice had kept her going. Had pushed her to keep surviving when she wanted to do nothing more than collapse in a heap and cry. She’d done that anyway, once or twice, but Alice had been there to drag her back out of the pit of self-pity and refocus her on what was important: survival.

Perhaps, most importantly, it was because of Rita that Alice got hurt. She was the one the Nightmare Tree had wanted. She was the reason it had tried ripping Alice apart. And she was the one who had been too slow to stop it. If for no other reason, that was why Alice deserved her full, undivided attention right now and why it was worth surrendering a portion of her own soul to save her. It was a price Alice had already paid for her.

Yes. That was it. Samual, Gora and the others were her friends, but Alice?

Alice was family.

“Huh. I know this wasn’t the price I’d left on my note,” Ixxy said, still busy discussing the contract with Timothy.

“I’d assumed the original price had just been a number you made up, so I put in a much more reasonable number. You know, considering the circumstances,” Timothy pointedly replied.

“You realize…?” Ixxy started, leaving the rest of her sentence hanging.

“Yes,” Timothy replied. “It will take longer. That’s fine.”

“What are the two of you going on about?” Gora asked suspiciously from the side.

“Nothing, just a little price negotiation, Gora,” Timothy replied. “But it’s all sorted. I’m sure Ixxy will be happy to accept what I’ve offered her for the contract, taking all factors into account.”

Ixxy sighed. “Fine. Yeah. This is fine. If Timothy’s happy with this, so am I.”

“Don’t you mean Rita?” Gora asked. “As long as Rita is okay with this?”

Ixxy waved her off. “Yeah, sure. As long as whoever is going to be paying is okay with this, we’ve got a deal. But that’s not going to be Rita.”

“What?” Rita piped up, surprised. “Of course I’m going to be the one…”

“Oh, no. No way,” Ixxy replied, shaking her head. “I’m going to be cutting into your soul. Who knows whether that’s going to leave you in any condition to pay the bill? Certainly not me, and I’m not willing to take that chance.”

Honestly, Ixxy could have just let the whole payment thing go by without comment.

Was it likely that Rita would have been unable to pay the fee after her surgery? No, not really. The cuts were going to be small, just big enough so that Ixxy could get to the bad bits.

Did it matter? Not really. Ixxy fully intended to steal Rita’s entire soul as a unit, so it wasn’t like she was going to be paying anything anyway due to being dead.

Uhhh, no, not dead, because then Ixxy’s answer to Rita’s question would have been a lie, but rather carefully removed and preserved independently of her body. For research purposes. Yes, that was it. No more aging, or sickness, or risking death in any of the myriad ways in which mortals expired every day. Honestly, if you really thought about it, Ixxy was going to be doing her a favour!

Why then make a fuss about getting someone else to pay?

Well, good old fashioned greed for one thing. She was already going to be swiping Rita’s entire soul, so negotiating payment from that pool was like arguing to pay yourself. But if someone else was putting up the collateral, Ixxy could finish the contract, yank Rita’s soul, and then calmly go collect her payment for the completed contract as well.

Win-win! For Ixxy, that is. Not the mortals. But who cared about them?

“So? Who’s it going to be?” Ixxy asked again, casually inspecting her nails.

The mortals shared a few surprised looks.

“Don’t look at me,” Gora quickly stated. “There’s no way I’d do a soul deal with one of these things.”

“Oh, have no fear, Stinky, I wouldn’t touch your soul with a ten foot pole if someone handed it to me for free,” Ixxy snapped back. “And Timothy can’t afford it. He’s still sucked dry from our last deal.”

“Metaphorically speaking!” Timothy squeaked when Gora turned to give him a filthy look.

“That leaves me then,” the hunk said, taking a step forward from where he’d been leaning against the wall. “Very well. I’ll do it.”

And there was reason number two for stirring the pot.

Ixxy suppressed a smirk. She was going to be getting her hands all over hunky boy, and while not as good as something a bit more intimate, it was better than nothing.

“O-okay. Thank you, Samual,” Rita said, looking ashamed. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise. Next one’s on me.”

Hunky boy — Samual — snorted. “Make sure there’s never need for a next one and I’ll consider us square.”

“Alright pretty boy,” Ixxy said, stepping up to him, a wide grin on her face. “Let’s get the credit check out of the way, eh?”

“Fine,” Samual said, holding out his hand. “Get on with it.”

Ixxy looked down at the proffered, mail-clad hand. “Okay, hear me out,” she said, gently rubbing her fingers over the metal links of his palm. “We could waste a couple of minutes going through all the hassle of getting enough of that armour off so I can get in deep enough for the check. Or…”

Then she suddenly lifted herself up on her toes and leaned forward, planting her lips squarely on his.

Mmm… kissing. Everything she’d hoped it was going to be. Plus, from this close, it was possible to get a good look at his sou…

Something loomed over her shoulder.

Something vast, ancient and…

Hostile.

It spoke only two words in a voice like mountains slamming into each other.

“OFF. LIMITS.”

Ixxy scrambled backwards so fast she tripped and crashed over furniture twice. She didn’t stop until she’d flattened herself against the opposite wall, panting and heaving from sheer panic.

A sudden silence filled the room, broken only by Ixxy’s terrified breathing.

Then she stamped her foot and screamed.

“You people are freaks!”