Peak of Autumn, Week 4, Day 5

Evelyn did not look like Eunora —her clothes were too meticulously pressed, and her eyes were too sharp. Evelyn did not look like Raphael —her countenance too composed, her body language too controlled. Every part of her was prim, every wave of her hand proper. She didn’t look like Theodore either. Her expression was anything but blank —the distaste from her voice clear on her face in all the subtle ways a lady was meant to show such things. The twitch of her upper lip, the slight arch of her eyebrow, the angle of her head. Subtle but not blank. She didn’t look like the Countess either, though she likely would to the Eunora of before. Evelyn simply didn’t hold the pressure of their mother. Unlike the others, and myself, Evelyn’s hair was smooth and straight —forcefully done so that she could look ever more refined.

She looked every bit the graceful lady she was training to be. It irritated me that she actually would know if I was dignified. Not that it mattered here in this empty courtyard. Correction —the courtyard that was supposed to be empty. In fact, a courtyard so out of the way it is almost always empty.

Ah. She came looking. I felt a brow twitch in irritation. Eunora of the before was coursing with anticipation, worry, fear, and hope. I had to kick those feelings down for my own distaste to come up. Evelyn and I agreed on one thing —this was not a sisterly relationship. Evelyn was hateful and cruel. And Eunora loved her in the way only a younger sister could, with admiration and adoration, both in spite of and because of the harsh treatment. It was a sick sort of love fueled by Evelyn's distaste, which turned it into a need for her acceptance. Though for the Eunora of before, that was rather the trend. The worse the Dawns treated her, the more she craved their affection —and the more she wanted it, the further away it became.

Evelyn is the second oldest at 14, but even as a child she was always hateful. That has gotten worse over the years, not better.

“Well? Get off that wretched table.” She hissed, stepping toward me and further into the courtyard.

I had already sat up, and my legs were nearly touching the ground, but the hurt from Eunora was fueling my irritation. So, instead of listening, I laid back down.

“Pass.”

I closed my eyes and tried to keep my anger under control. It was unlike in elsewhere, where I had been free to express whatever I needed. Here, if I gave in to my rage, I knew I would lose whatever minuscule control I had found. And this was all I had —power over myself. Not to mention that my rage often choked me anyway, so I never fully got out the anger.

I was looking back up to the sky when I felt a breeze tickle my nose. It itched, so I turned my head —only for a streak of light to cross through where my face had just been. I snapped back up and looked at Evelyn. She still had her hand pointed toward me, and the runes circling her had yet to fade. Unlike my Class, hers clearly didn’t give her a manipulation ability. The runes circling her meant she had to channel mana to move it —but the fact that she’d only manifested a bolt of light meant she had yet to contract an elemental.

“I said get up, Nora,” Evelyn’s smile was sadistic, and she clearly expected me to cower.

Another bubble of rage joined the others. What is the matter with this family? Do they never rest? And then came another thought, They can’t all think that they deserve to know my Class. This is the third time in as many days.

I closed my eyes and let out a harsh breath, “What do you want?”

Her smile widened.

“Oh, you know, just the usual,” her face and tone dropped, “Tell me what you picked. Raphael, the brute, wouldn’t share -even though we all know you told him.”

Oh, do they? I grit my teeth. They all think I am weak, something to discard at will. It is what they have always thought, no matter who occupied this body. Both souls were enraged now, and it was causing my stomach to sink. I flexed my hand to distract myself. Raphael was an idiot, yeah, and ignoring him would work. He simply got angry and stomped off. Theodore only dropped by out of curiosity. Ignoring him was an easy answer as well. But Evelyn was a different story. Ignoring her meant getting magic bolts thrown at me, or magelights to blind me, or salt in my water.

The rage in me told me attack. It told me that the only answer to force was force. Whatever cunning Evelyn thought she had was lesser in comparison to the power of my Class. But there was another voice, too —one that said it would make it worse. That hurting her would hurt me more. That I didn’t have enough power to protect myself for long. And that voice was horrifically correct.

But still.

“Hey, are you listening to me?” Evelyn snapped as my eyes fell away from her and back up toward the sky.

I decided I would give it one more shot.

My eyes focused back on Evelyn as a whole, and I brought my intentions to bear. With every syllable, I infused my Will into ‘engage.’

“[Sophism]”

“What? Was that a Skill?”

And as Evelyn gave a confused huff, the world came alive with red light. Strands of glowing red flowed from me, looping their way across the courtyard to Evelyn. They crawled up her legs, wrapping around her until I could barely see her sneer. It was hilarious, really. To know so assuredly I would be playing into Grel’s hands. Chaos. Any way I went about it would not be like her. Eunora would swallow her pain and hope for the best. She would apologize or give up the information. She would do whatever Evelyn said —even to her own detriment.

I had known we were different, Eunora and I. But I was here. Living in her body. Stealing her future. Overwriting her personality with every move. And I had known Eunora was still inside me —I had inherited her memories, after all. I still had her body’s responses. Usually, I tried not to think too hard about it. About what that made me — a bodysnatcher? A wandering soul? But in this moment, my rage died, and relief flooded through me.

Eunora —Nora— Nori. Whoever she was, she was, first and foremost, a child. Sad and alone and in desperate need of love. Well, I can’t say I can love her in their stead. I don’t think I have it in me. But I can hate them. Evelyn — Mallorica — Raphael — Theodore. I can hate them in her place. It’s not what she wants, I can feel it in me, but maybe it’ll prove they never deserved her anyway.

The red light of Chaos whirled for another moment before settling into the background, and I felt a smile spread across my face. A different kind of coldness filled me —unlike the cold numbness of grief or the ice of mana. This was me. ______ _______. This was me from elsewhere.

“Oh, Eve.” I slid off the table, the heels of my boots crunching a pile of leaves as I stood loosely holding Noir in one hand, “I bet you’re a [Young Lady]. I bet you saw that [Uncommon] title and thought, ‘I deserve this.’”

I stood lower than Evelyn by virtue of still being in a child’s body. But as I took several slow steps towards her, I got a full view of the emotions warring across her face —confusion, recognition, rage.

“Excuse you?” She hissed, holding her hand out again, lighting it up with runes as she began whispering the words of mana and focusing her Will. All this only took her half a breath, and I felt a breeze across my shoulder.

[Sophism] hadn’t ended, and my mind was still racing from it. Between that and my natural Perception, I could tell it was where I would be hit. So I stepped to the left and watched as another magic bolt flew by. Once was a fluke. Twice was skill. It was all thanks to my triple-digit Perception and my higher Dexterity.

I kept heading toward Evelyn, my pace barely bothered, “No need to excuse me. I’m not the one in the wrong.”

I can’t use my Skills, not really, I tsk’d mentally, I’m not skilled enough to use them without speaking them. I blinked as a thought occurred to me, and my smile —small as it had been— became sharper. I don’t need to hide the Divine. They won’t know what they mean, just like [Sophism].

“What are you going to do?” Evelyn choked out a laugh as she looked down her nose at me, “Hide in a corner and cry?”

“[Steal Nerves]”

My voice had a heavy cadence to it when I activated the Skill, and suddenly I knew why Eunora had screamed at me that this Skill was dangerous. Whereas I had been fueled by disgust before, my words lined with malice on principle, now I had the confidence as well. My breathing became measured, slow and steady, and I felt myself stand just a bit taller. In contrast, I could see the uncertainty filling Evelyn, from how her brow furrowed to the slight slump of her shoulders —even her eyes had lost some of their glare.

“What are you going to do?” I mimicked, my nose high and my shoulders back, “Hide in a corner and cry?”

“What’re-“ Evelyn caught herself as her voice wavered before taking a sharp breath and restarting, “What have you done?”

“Oh, me? Nothing, really.” My mind was steel, my surety in her guilt growing by spades, it no longer matter that Evelyn, too, was a child. I flinched at my own thought.

Something is wrong. I frowned, trying to control my mind. The closest I could get was answering Evelyn’s earlier question, “It’s not any of your business what my Class is. Or what my Skills are. Or even what I’m planning to do.”

“Well-“ She started but I was next to her, forcing myself to pass her, and I bumped into her, cutting her off.

“No.” Something is wrong. My voice was hard, and my frown deepened. Still, my countenance grew strong as Evelyn’s seemed to wither, “I’ll be gone soon. Just leave me be for a while longer, yet.”

And then I felt both Skills release at once, snapping back within me and causing me to gasp. I booked it out of the entry to the courtyard and bolted through the hedge maze before Evelyn could come back to her senses.

I was breathing heavily once I found myself back under the window to my room. But not from exertion. My breathing was shallow, and my heart was hammering in my chest.

Wrong. That was w r o n g. Whatever that Skill was, it wasn’t meant for mortal use. It filled me with a sense of right. It was not just a matter of confidence. It made me feel higher than her, as if she was a bug to trample on my path to greatness. But I didn’t want to be great. I just wanted to be in control.

I looked over my shoulder, trying to measure my breathing. Deep breath in, deep breath out. But all I could think of was how I stole something from Evelyn –and received more. Much like [Mental Fortitude], something inside of me was saying [Steal Nerves] did something different than the System had said.

I decided then that [Steal Nerves] was a last resort.

The two notifications that had been trying to force my attention didn’t catch my notice until after I had calmed down and already climbed back into my room.

I allowed them in as I rolled up more of my [Weave of Darkness].

[Congratulations! Sophism is now Level 2! Divine experience logged!]

[Congratulations! Steal Nerves is now Level 2! Divine experience logged!]

Because that’s not ominous, I sighed to myself.

I had checked beforehand that no one was around, but now I took in the emptiness of my room. What had once been an odd mixture of Dawn iconography and a child’s room was now a pile of five wooden boxes —neatly labeled. Day clothes. Night clothes. Sentiments. Decor. Miscellaneous.

I wondered, briefly, what they’d decided was a sentiment, but ultimately I left it alone. Instead choosing to take the [Weave of Darkness] I’d just created and begin a new pattern. This time, rather than a bunny or teddy bear, I decided to try a panda. I had the colors for it, after all.