April 10, 2019.

My body is slipping away, converting to base mana. Pretty sure you’re supposed to be dead before this happens. Even before the System came to Akilo this didn’t happen unless you were dead.

Which means this isn’t good. Reaching out with my mana-sense, I discover the problem. There’s nothing anchoring my mana to my body. Minor inconvenience, that.

Pausing gives me time before my body is completely gone. At least my ability to stop time works. Weird. Huh. Both my arms are already gone. Looks like my left leg is following close behind.

Yeah. This is solidly in the ‘not good’ category.

When I slip into my soul-scape, I see that the System connections are steeped in black energy, literally tearing at my soul-scape. Am I being killed by the System?

Sheesh, impatient much? Okay, no big deal. Just separate myself from the System and I’ll be fine. Other than my missing limbs.

Survive first, Alexis. Figure out the rest later.

As I draw Facet together to begin my work, my mental space shakes, and I feel a tug. As much as I want to visit Smoulder and Uthica, now’s not the time, so I hold off. There’s a moment of confusion as I see Uthica ripping apart a Thenite with raw wind mana as she scrambles through bodies piled so deep the ground isn’t visible.

Then I’m back in the present.

I don’t know if I could’ve helped them, but it wouldn’t have been worth it if I’d died doing so. Instead, I return to my work, using Facet to make my first incision. I start by separating the fabric of my class from the System interface. Parts of the System end up broken apart, little more than clutter within my mental space. But the spinning and tearing stops.

Several incisions later I’m forced to admit I'm not fast enough. I’m not going to have enough time. I need an anchor to keep my body from disappearing. I try to return to myself, but I’m blocked. There’s no way out of my soul-scape. Does that mean my body… no. I can still feel the mana around me. I just need to bind myself to it. The obvious choice is Smoulder. Or more accurately, a statue of her. It’s practically zero effort to form one. And there’s tons of emotional resonance. Which… is probably important.

So, I create a web stretching across my soul-scape, anchored on the Seed which… was already disconnected from the System. That’s…

There’s a disruption when Beth leaves the room, the fact I can notice making me pause, but I feel my soul-scape crumbling. So, I ignore the Seed’s weirdness as I continue. Losing count of how many Smoulder statues I create, my soul-scape stabilizes. But now my mana-sense is blind.

Which is just another issue I don’t have time to address. It takes a long time to work my way around each of the System connections, the dark energy tearing at me the entire time. It seems familiar.

Hours of effort leave me with only a single connection to the System. I’ve managed to bind my abilities to the seed. Or… I think I have. But the Seed isn’t the source of connection. A bond runs through my Cleaning skill. Cause unlike the rest of my interface, it’s completely free of the spinning void trying to destroy… everything?

Reaching toward my skill, the connection snaps, causing me to blink.

I… didn’t cut it.

But it did snap. The skill itself remains intact, yet the connection to the System is just… gone.

The moment the connection is gone, my soul-scape heaves, contracting inward. I panic as my skills and abilities are compressed, everything rushing toward me. Then the Seed explodes, a wave of Twilight-tinged mana stretching out. It doesn’t stop the collapse, but instead of the initial chaos, everything starts folding inward neatly.

Seconds later and I’m left sitting in near darkness, the only light, a soft blue glow emanating from my body. My soul-scape is gone, and my attempt to leave elicits no response. It appears I’m trapped in my soul-scape. Or… maybe I’m in the Seed? The soft blue light is the only thing that lets me know I’m not lost in an infinite void.

Suddenly, a figure appears. It’s the Forerunner Theglia. But not like I last saw her. She’s transparent, her dark grey bark and blue eyes faded to only a fraction of their normal luster.

“Hello Forerunner. If you’re seeing this message, then something has gone wrong. You are suffering from mana poisoning but for some reason the System has abandoned you. I apologize. Without the System to regulate your mana, many unpleasant fates await you. There’s only one thing I can do for you. If you choose to end it, simply say the phrase, “From the End we Salute you.”

Ah. It’s a recording.

Damn. No help there.

Still, I don’t intend to give up. And I don’t feel like I’m in danger at the moment. In fact, I feel safe. Like I’m in a cocoon. Another point for being inside the Seed. Theglia’s image repeats her message three times before it disappears, leaving me alone to experiment. If she’s right, I’m going to need to manage my mana on my own now. But everything feels stable.

So, I attempt to explore. Unfortunately, the inside of the Seed is empty, with nothing to be found. Which leaves me playing through my memories. Cuddling with Smoulder. Visiting aunt Sharon. Going swimming with mom when we played tag around the pool. Mom screaming at the lifeguard after I was reprimanded for running up the waterslide. Sab and I getting triple scoop icecream together, neither of us able to finish.

An afternoon on a hill outside of town with papa. Just the two of us, with a sled and the entire night to ourselves. With nothing else to do, I slip into the memory, enjoying an afternoon playing with my father. Near evening, as the sun began to set, a streak of light in the sky to the North. A shooting star.

A wish to be able to stay and sled with papa forever. I didn’t get that wish.

I don’t know if that was the day I unlocked an ability to wield ice. But it was the night I discovered I could. It was such a simple thing too. Papa’s steps were too deep to follow as the snow continued falling, into the late evening. With a fit, I pushed and the snow answered, cleaving in two, leaving a clear path. Papa had been calm. Or I hadn’t realized how nervous he was until now.

We had several months of training after that, though I considered it play time. Papa warned me not to tell mom. Which was easy. Even then, I knew better than to tell mom about anything fun. She’d already started to… deteriorate.

I continue watching the memories, working with papa until a month before the science fair. Then we receive a knock at the door. I was working on homework in the living room. Papa’s voice was hushed but I could make out the lady outside telling him she was here to see an Alexis. Beth’s voice.

But papa told her that her paperwork wasn’t legal. That she wasn’t with the RCMP and she didn’t have jurisdiction here so she should go before he contacted the real police.

She returned the next day when mom was home, papa gone out on an errand. I was watching TV, an old episode of a wacky bunny harassing a fumbling hunter. Beth was promptly admitted to our home when she told mom that her daughter, little old me, had been seen causing a disturbance in the park. I was forced to apologize to Beth without even knowing what I’d been accused of. At the time I’d been focused on how unfair my mom was, but now I realize Beth was taking notes the entire time. And she had a large briefcase that she set next to me.

Beth’s words as she was saying goodbye to my mom float forward in this weird recollection I’m stuck in. “Thank you for your assistance. I’m sure she’ll be perfectly behaved in the future. Though I may have to take some precautions. You said your husband is rather involved in her life?”

“Yeah, spends more time with her than me these days. As if she’s worth it.”

Beth stares at mom, her hand clenching. “I imagine she has redeeming qualities.”

“She’s quiet, I guess.”

There's a long silence as Beth and my mom stare at each other. Then Beth gives me a nod, before saying, “Have a good night miss Everette. Thank you for your time.”

The next few days are a blur, papa and I working on my science project. Papa’s truck broke down the day before the science fair. So instead, we ended up taking mom’s car. I didn’t really think of it as mom’s car, but now I realize it had always been hers. Papa drove his old truck everywhere.

Even as the familiar cold descends, coating the road in ice, I watch with renewed interest. Beth is following us, but I can only catch glimpses of her in the side mirror. The back window is full of my science project. When I get out and throw my fit at the school, I see Beth’s car parked several blocks away, obscured by the other students and parents moving about. When papa drives away, I watch her car pull out and follow him as I complain to a nearby teacher.

I urge myself to turn around, to take one more look.

To my surprise, my view shifts.

Beth was furious. Her plans weren’t working as smoothly as normal. Something about the kid. That had to be why the truck the kid’s father normally drove broke down.

As they left the school behind, she glanced back. Yep, kid was glaring after them. Definitely wasn’t pleased about her father’s change in plans.

Not that Beth was either. This had been the day she was going to solve the kid’s problem. She needed him to stop so she could get the bomb out before it was discovered. She’d already sent the remote disable code, but it was better not to be sloppy.

She almost scoffed when she noticed him holding his phone up, texting as he drove.

A perfect excuse.

Speeding up, Beth prepared to give him the gentle nudge that would result in a fender-bender. Once he got out to argue over the insurance, she could-

His phone slipped, and he moved the wheel to catch it. Time seemed to slow down as Beth hit the brakes, bleeding speed quickly. The car in front of her didn’t.

It continued on its path, then as he recovered, she saw the wheels turn to the sides as he tried to recover. But he was too late.

The little blue car slid along the icy road, smashing into the gnarled tree hanging over the intersection well above the posted limit of fifty kph. Beth pulled to a stop, watching as, of all people, the damn detective ran out of a nearby coffee shop towards the car.

Just what she needed. Beth got out of her car, running over. She was glad to see the detective on the phone. It meant she didn’t have to make the call. One less piece of data Mr Universe would need to clean up later. The man nodded to Beth when she approached. He turned away from the cold wind as he talked into the phone, and that was when Beth kneeled down, reaching under the car’s running board. The trigger detached. The little black box, a piece of tech so advanced she hardly understood it, dropped into her hand. She quickly stood, peering through the window. She was relieved to see the airbags had triggered. He even seemed to be breathing, so at least he hadn’t gotten himself killed.

“Don’t move him,” The detective warned her.

Beth nodded. She knew better.

“Never seen a car crash before?” he asked.

Beth shook her head, faking a shiver, hiding her frustration.

“This isn’t… it could’ve been worse. At least Fred’s breathing,” the detective said.

“You know him?” Beth asked. Not that she needed the information. She’d been scouting the town long enough to know they shared a weekly game night. Darts and some sort of role-playing game. Seemed wasteful but she tried not to judge. She’d seen people with far more offensive ‘hobbies’. Most of whom were dead now.

“Yeah. He’s a friend. Damn this weather, right?”

“Yeah,” Beth agreed with that. If not for the storm, maybe the truck would’ve been running and his wife would’ve taken the car. Or maybe he would’ve been able to recover from his fumble. Mr Universe had warned her there’d be strange activities around the kid. She still wasn’t sure if the storm had been the kid, but if it had…

Well, that’s why she was keeping the kid at arm's length. She was already too... invested.

Beth glanced down at the unconscious man, frustration flaring. She’d have to hold off on killing the mother now. She couldn’t take away both the kid’s parents. Not unless she wanted to step in.

Hopefully, it wouldn’t be long until he recovered.

I finally release the mental shift, and my memory continues through the rest of the lonely night, but I pull out of that as well.

Well, I guess I know the truth now. Beth’d been trying to kill mom. Pretty sure I should feel more upset about that but… I’m honestly more pissed she wasn't able to save my papa. And that he was on his phone while driving. Or… I don’t know. Not exactly easy to pick my own emotions apart.

I've never felt the need to blow something up as much as I do right this moment. But I’m still stuck inside the damn Seed with nothing but my memories and the faint blue light glowing from within.

Which means I need to find a way out. I don’t know how long I’ve been here. Maybe I’m not supposed to be here, and getting locked inside was an accident? Or maybe this is a side-effect of my sporadic attempt to keep everything?

Time to explore.

I don’t seem to have access to any of my mana-senses. There are no tendrils to manipulate. But I’m able to move my consciousness. You’d think I wouldn’t be able to tell if I was moving, but the blue glow doesn't follow me, allowing my consciousness to draw away from the body. Before I run out of light, I bump into something.

A wall of darkness stretches in every direction. Following it reveals that it curves gently. The wall doesn’t respond to any of my attempts to shift it, remaining unbending no matter how hard I throw myself at it. At least I can’t be injured.

The wall isn't smooth, numerous deep valleys and jagged ridges interrupting my journey. They’re enough to start mapping out the dark interior of the Seed. An indeterminate amount of time later, I’ve travelled the entirety of the shell holding me in. It seems to be mostly spherical, with an elongated top. Not certain it’s the top given the lack of anything resembling gravity, but having a reference helps ground my explorations. It feels as though I’ve been here for… a long time. Much longer than it would’ve taken to be Restored, if that didn’t seem to be off the table with the loss of my System.

I’ve played through more memories. Nothing revolutionary, though it’s impressive how often Beth was there. A face in the distance, showing up once every few months, there for a week then gone again. I’d even met her several more times. She’d been in disguise every time. If not for my intimate familiarity with her now, and the ability to suddenly jump into her thoughts, I’d have had no idea it was her.

She didn’t even use magic. Just makeup, wigs and other props.

Creepy, but impressive.

As I start another tour of the shell, the valleys come more frequently. They’re in the same locations relative to before. But they’re closer together. Is the sphere shrinking? I complete a trip around the sphere twice, but this time it remains consistent.

What’s changed. Is it just my perception?

Trying to change how I look at things, I keep trying to picture things differently, but it’s about as effective as wishing that Smoulder was back. Deciding to take a break, I start going through my first memories on Akilo. My discovery of magic. Meeting Smoulder at the spring. Waking up alone outside the church after the others had been captured.

After playing through the last memory, I return to my glow-self to repeat my attempts. Only to discover the sphere’s shrunk again.

Wait. Does replaying memories cause the sphere to shrink. This time I skip back to shortly after Sab got her kitty Meow-meow and the subsequent search for her throughout Sab's basement.

Returning, I inspect everything around me carefully. No apparent change. Next, I replay a memory of my mom cooking pasta with green noodles and sauce because I was upset with the colour yellow. In my defence I was a toddler at the time. The memory is actually new to me. Mom’s patience when I make a face at the green pasta is amazing.

Still no change to the darkness though.

I’m not sure it’s helping, but I can’t help but go back into my deeper memories of mom again. There are times spent cuddling on the couch, watching teevee together. Playing tag in the yard. Building pillow forts.

Where did this woman go?

But as I watch my memories, I realize when it started. When papa lost his old job. Her and papa are fighting more and more as he’s unable to find work that pays as well. Then mom gets a job. But something happens at work. Mom leaves the house for a week, going to her friend’s. A phonecall to pick her up from the casino.

I stop watching, returning to the dark sphere.

For a minute I forget about leaving. I just sit there processing the change in my mom. Trying to understand how it all went so wrong. It just doesn’t seem right that she changed because of money. It’s so… basic.

But as I look over my memories again and again. It really does seem like… she just gave up.

Finally, I stop looking through my memories and look around. Even after all that, the Sphere hasn’t changed. Clearly, it’s not waiting on me to discover some hidden truth involving my mom.

Which means it’s something else. Moving through my memories, forward in time, it’s only when I play through the memory of opening the letter that something changes. The sphere of darkness begins to crack. It’s so pronounced that I notice it even as I’m replaying the memory.

When I come out of my memory to throw myself at the cracks, they don’t shift. I’m still locked inside.

So, I return to the memory. As I get closer and closer to when I fell asleep, the cracks grow wider.

Then a memory I definitely don’t recall starts playing itself. A woman in white stands before me, in an empty grey sphere, her eyes an empty black as she looks at me. Why do I feel like I know this woman?

And why do I know her name is Odeon?