Chapter XXX

“Don’t you think we should head back? Those storm clouds look a little close.”

Jay and Audrey both glanced back at Rina’s concerned question as she stared off into the distance where there was a mass of dark gray clouds headed their way. Alice was standing beside the girl, seeming a little worried as well, but neither Audrey nor Jay were bothered by the prospect of a storm. In fact, Jay could see in his good friend’s eyes that she was excited by the idea of rain.

That weekend, Alice’s parents had taken them up to Coralton, a small town in the mountains a few hours north of Wilham, where they were staying in a lodge to enjoy the hot springs. It was their second day of the trip and they had decided to go out on a hike by themselves, much to the clear dismay of Alice’s mother. At the moment, they were walking along a cliffside path on their way to the summit where the hiking trail led. They were already within a mile of the top so Jay simply shook his head and brushed Rina’s concerns aside.

“Nah, we’ll be fine,” he called back to her. “A little rain never hurt anybody.”

Audrey nodded her agreement. “Yeah, we can’t head home already. This could be our last real trip before school starts. If we head home now then it’s already over. Come on, Rina, you worry too much.”

Their friend hesitated once more, clearly unconvinced, before sighing and shrugging. “Fine, fine, whatever you idiots say. Just don’t come crying to me if you get hurt.”

“We won’t. Don’t worry,” he replied. “We’ll cry to Alice instead.”

Alice rolled her eyes. “I don’t want to hear it either. I do think we should go home but, then again, I didn’t really want to go hiking in the first place. So how about we just pick up the pace so we can get back to the lodge where it's warmer?”

Audrey laughed as their friend pulled her jacket tighter around her body. “Alright, let’s hurry up then! Last one to the top owes the rest of us an ice cream!”

“Wha—?! Wait a second, Audrey!” Rina protested, but both she and Jay ignored her as they picked up their pace and began to sprint further to the top.

They were laughing like they didn’t have a care in the world. All they wanted to do was have fun, and with the end of summer vacation looming before them, there was never a better time to enjoy themselves. Nothing could go wrong, after all. That was how Jay always thought. His life was happy. Despite his distant relationship with his parents, he considered his life a good one. He never even considered the possibility that he could lose that happiness, let alone that it could all end on that day.

Even as the rain picked up, they smiled.

Even when the path got muddy and slippery, they smiled.

Even as the wind got more intense, they smiled.

But the lifespans of those smiles were shorter than they should have been. That was the day it ended. That was the day Jay’s life changed and could never go back.

It was the day his paradise died.

***

And yet, you have that paradise back, don’t you? The erased realm has given you what you lost. It's given Alice what you lost. Lilly Harper intends to take it all away from you. She’s going to take Audrey and Rina away from you. But you can stop her, can’t you?

I can stop her, can’t I? But I don’t want to hurt her! I know she means well!

Whether she means well or not is unimportant. Alice Mendez is your life. Alice Mendez is who you live for. She is your reason to live and she always has been.

But I was supposed to live for myself, too. That’s what I promised Alice, that day in our hideout.

But how can you live for yourself if you lose Alice? Harper wants to take her. Harper wants to steal the last piece of happiness you have. We can’t let her do that. If we kill Lilly Harper, then the erased realm becomes eternal. They can’t escape without The Angel. Kill The Angel, save Alice.

But, it’s Lilly. It’s my friend! I can’t kill her!

You must. You must choose between Lilly and Alice… Is that not a simple choice?

***

With a scream, the monster that had once again taken control of Jay’s body launched itself from the ground and flew toward where Lilly stood on the balcony of Rista’s apartment. She didn’t even have time to think before The Angel reacted, casting a spell that controlled the shadows of the night around her. She could feel her body melting into the darkness, as if her very form had become shadow, and she moved through them, avoiding the sharp claws of the creature. As she watched the balcony explode into shards of wood, she felt her feet reform on the street below as her body emerged from darkness, becoming herself again.

“I am sorry about this, Harper, but I’m going to have to kill this thing. It’s a puppet of Nigreos Noctis that will only hinder our success here. The nerich must be stopped. So please do not resist.”

Wait! You can’t! I don’t care what that thing is! Do not kill Jay!

What the voice referred to as the nerich sunk its claws into the wall of the apartment building as it turned its head around one-hundred and eighty degrees, its black eyes seeking Lilly before settling on where she stood in the middle of the road.

Where have you even been this whole time?! You brought Jay’s memories back and then just disappeared on me!

“Yeah, sorry about that, but we thought it might be better to observe the nerich without allowing you to hear our thoughts. He didn’t want you to be aware of the possibility that we may have to kill Mr. Brooks.”

You are not killing him, you hear me!

Before she could get another word in, the nerich propelled itself off the building and flew down toward her, moving just as fast as she remembered. Lilly’s arm swung upwards and she could feel her mouth beginning to move as The Angel tried to speak an incantation, but Lilly was adamant about preventing Jay from getting hurt. Using all her strength, she bit down on her tongue so hard that she could taste blood.

“Idiot! Don’t resist us!”

Lilly’s body lurched sideways just as the nerich’s claw swung down toward her, missing her by barely an inch as it slammed the blades down into the concrete of the road. But of course, it was fast, and was already turning to land another strike. By this point, The Angel had broken past her resistance and shouted, “Luminetta!”

In Lilly’s left hand, a ball of light suddenly erupted, bursting so quickly that it was gone before she had even processed its presence, but that momentary flash was enough to cause the nerich to flinch backwards, frantically clawing its way down the road to put distance between them.

“Illumine!” she shouted.

It was a similar sensation to just moments before, but this time, her body became pure, bright light. It was so fast that she didn’t even know what had happened before she was physical again, yet as she frantically looked around, she realized that she was no longer on the street. Somehow, she had reached the roof of the Rista’s apartment building and could hear the nerich’s screams down below.

“What in the hell are you doing?! We need to kill that thing! Why did we run?!”

At first, Lilly thought the Voice of Darkness was addressing her, but when the other voice responded, she realized that wasn’t the case.

“I was just thinking that maybe we need to think about this more diplomatically. After all, it's not like it's impossible for us to save Brooks and kill the nerich, right?”

“I never said it was impossible! However, that thing is bonded with Nigreos, so we can kill it in mere seconds if we go all out! Trying to save Brooks would just put Harper in unnecessary danger!”

It’s not unnecessary! Lilly hurriedly interjected. Light, you said there’s a way we can save him? How? I mean, what even is that thing? What did Nigreos put inside him?!

“Oh, it's a nerich. It's a sort of parasite that bonds really well with dark magic users. My best guess is that Nigreos put it inside of him to gain an edge over the Omaruans. However, it's a being that bonds with the soul, not the body, so it came here when Brooks was erased. Therefore, if we can pull the creature out of his soul then Jay Brooks himself can be left intact.”

Then let’s do that! she internally shouted, and as she did, she could hear more screams and the sound of metal against concrete, which she feared could only mean that the nerich was climbing the building to get up to her.

“It’s not that simple! In order to extract the nerich, we’d have to hold Brooks down for long enough to finish the process! And if we’re not fighting to kill then our arsenal isn’t as strong!”

And? Eric told me he held the thing down with rock magic back in Wilham! Can we not do the same?

“Unfortunately, we only know dark and light magic and those are pretty focused on murder, so we don’t have a ton of options.”

Lilly grimaced and impatiently ran her hands through her hair. Fantastic! Well, what about that spell Nigreos used to hold us down with shadow?! What about that?!

“Probably our best bet, but the nerich is a being of darkness so it won’t be as effective as it was on you humans.”

But it's still effective to some extent, right?!

She could feel her heart beating in her chest as the violent scraping drew closer so she clenched her teeth and thought, Just do whatever you need to! Use as much power as necessary, but save Jay! Get that damned nerich out of his mind once and for all!

A loud noise rang out behind her and when she turned around, she saw the creature’s claws gripping the side of the roof and, moments later, its twisted face rose over the side to stare at her, a wicked, toothy grin directed her way, like a predator that was enjoying its hunt for its prey.

“If we use too much power, it’ll hurt you,” the Voice of Darkness warned.

I don’t give a fuck. Use what you need. Just save him.

At that moment, Lilly felt her body surging with energy in a way that she hadn’t felt since her fight with Rista and, much like that day, she could feel vast amounts of power centering around her back, telling her that The Angel was taking over.

“Very well, Lilly Harper. We’ll do what we can. But if this doesn’t work… Jay Brooks dies.”

***

It wasn’t supposed to go like this! This wasn’t what should have happened! We just didn’t want it to end! We didn’t want summer to end just yet! So why?! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!

Jay had seen her slip.

He had seen Audrey’s foot lose balance due to the mud and the strong winds up on that mountain path. They’d been heading back to the lodge when the storm got really bad and the wind was blowing far harder than was safe. They needed to get back. Rina kept urging that they go back to the lodge, and Audrey and Jay had finally agreed that they were out for longer than was safe. They picked up their pace, anxious to get to the warm interior of the lodge.

“Don’t go so fast!” Rina had shouted over the rain.

Audrey merely glanced over her shoulder and winked. “Which is it, Ri”?” she teased. “Do you want us to hurry back or do you want us to go slow? We can’t do both!”

It was a joke. Audrey had been telling jokes even in such an arguably dangerous moment. In fact, despite the wind and rain, she was beaming like she was having the time of her life.

Then she lost her footing.

She slipped and the slickness of the mud caused her other foot to catch on a stray rock, causing her body to lurch to the left, the direction of the cliffside, before she tumbled over the edge. That smile had faltered slightly when she tripped, but she must not have believed it would be that big of a deal as she almost laughed.

“AUDREY!”

Jay was the one who shouted. He and Audrey were up front, a good few yards ahead of Alice and Rina, so he saw her go over first. He stood right beside his best friend as her body went over the side—as that smile faltered. He reacted on pure instinct and jumped for her, barely managing to grasp her wrist and stop her fall into the trees far below. Time seemed to slow as he stared into her eyes.

The smile was gone.

The happiness and excitement were gone.

The only thing left in her eyes was terror as the reality of what was happening settled in. That image seared itself in Jay’s memory as his own body began to slip along the mud, and if nobody intervened then he and Audrey would go over the side together. He heard Rina and Alice screaming behind them. He could feel Audrey’s slick arm slipping through his grasp, his strength not good enough to hold her up.

In hindsight, Jay always wished that he could have gone over the side with her. For the years that followed that moment, he wished that he and Audrey could have died, side-by-side, hand-in-hand. They could have been together in whatever afterlife existed beyond.

But that wasn’t what happened. Instead, he stared over that cliffside as his childhood friend’s form got further and further away, accompanied by her screams of terror until they abruptly went silent. He didn’t know whether it was Alice or Rina trying to pull him away from the cliff. He just remembered shrieking his lungs out, begging for her to come back, apologizing for dropping her—for not being fast enough nor strong enough to protect her. The one pulling him back wrapped her arms around him but her touch was cold.

He would never forget the terror in her eyes.

He would never forget her screaming.

The day Audrey Moore died was stuck on an endless loop in his mind, reminding him of what he did to his best friend.

***

And that is why we must protect the erased realm. That moment didn’t happen here. In this world, that trip never happened. You went to high school with them. Audrey Moore didn’t die. Rina Davens didn’t detest you. Alice Mendez never suffered. And you never tried to kill yourself.

But to protect this world, I have to kill Lilly? Can I really do that? I already killed Audrey and Rina. I can’t have Lilly’s blood on my hands, too. It’s just too much! I can’t do this any more! I just can’t!

And that is why you must pick. Alice or Lilly? Heaven or Hell? The choice is yours, boy, and you know the answer without me telling you. Look upon her. She’s ready to kill you…

Jay’s eyes flickered open and he found himself peeking over the side of the building’s roof, gaping at the surreal sight before him. Lilly Harper stood just a few yards away, but it wasn’t the girl he was used to seeing. Her eyes were gazing at him, one white and one black, and her hair had turned both colors, split down the center. There were patches of her skin that had gone pale or black as unbridled power radiated off of her. But what truly left him stunned were the giant masses of black and white mana surging out from her back, seeming to have burst from under her shirt, and taking a form that could be perceived as the wings of an angel. They spread out for five feet in both directions, floating in the air as bolts of mana sparked off of them.

Do you see? The Angel has come out…to kill you.

The moment that sentence echoed through his mind, Lilly Harper, The Angel, smiled darkly and pushed off her back leg, lunging forward.

***

Pain erupted through Jay’s head and he felt himself collapsing backwards before colliding with the ground of his empty apartment. His hands went to his forehead, the place where she struck him, as he turned his stunned stare up at Rina Davens, who stood over him as she moved through his apartment’s doorway with a hatred in her eyes that he had never seen directed his way by anybody, let alone a dear friend.

“Rina!” Alice shouted from somewhere behind him, but the girl that was supposed to be his friend just glared down at him, ignoring Alice.

“This is your fault!” she snarled. “Do you understand that, Jay?! Audrey died because of you! If you’d just listened to me and Alice and gone back when we saw the storm then Audrey would be alive right now! But no! You just had to keep going!”

“B-but…” he sputtered.

“No! You did this! You didn’t listen! You never listen! And then you failed to catch her! You were right there and you still failed! You were next to her and you dropped her! You failed! You failed her, Jay!”

As he listened to Rina shout at him, he wanted so desperately to argue back. He wanted to explain that it wasn't his fault. He didn’t want to see Rina, a girl he cared so much about, staring at him like he was a monster. Her eyes were pained as she looked at who she must have considered to be Audrey’s killer—her murderer. Jay murdered Audrey. She looked at him like he did it himself. It made him want to cry. He wanted to beg Rina to understand that it wasn’t his fault. He wanted her to know that he had done everything he could, yet he realized that he couldn't say any of those things. He couldn’t save Audrey. He was right there and he couldn’t save her.

I killed her. I’m the one who killed Audrey. It's my fault. I did this. I failed. I was useless. I was stupid. I was fucking stupid! I should have listened to Rina! She was right, damn it!

“Nothing to say?” Rina spat. “Do you honestly have nothing to say for yourself, you piece of shit?!”

The girl stalked forward, as if ready to kick him in the face, and Jay forced himself not to flinch away so he could take the punishment he deserved, but the attack never came. Before he knew it, Alice had jumped in between them, her arms outstretched.

“Rina, stop it!” she begged. “It wasn’t Jay’s fault! It’s nobody’s fault! It was an accident! It was… It was just an accident.”

Rina violently shook her head. “But it could have been avoided! We could have avoided it if he just listened to us!”

“But it wasn’t just him!” Alice shouted back. “Audrey didn’t listen either! Audrey refused to go back to the lodge! She wanted to keep hiking just as much as Jay did! So if you want to blame Jay then you have to blame Audrey, too! But it wasn’t their fault! It wasn’t—!”

A loud crack erupted through the room as Rina slapped Alice across the cheek, causing the girl to stumble backwards.

“Don’t you dare blame Audrey for this!” Rina breathed. “It was not her fault. If Jay had just conceded, Audrey would have come with us. You know she praised the ground he walked on! If he had just listened!”

Jay wasn’t sure what he expected out of Alice and he wanted to intervene, but he couldn’t. He couldn't get himself to stand. And as he watched like a coward from the ground, Alice’s features twisted into an anger of her own as she rose to her full height.

“You honestly think anybody could have convinced Audrey to listen?!” Alice snarled. “She never listened! She did whatever the hell she wanted and even Jay couldn’t have changed that! There was nothing we could have done!”

Rina laughed bitterly as she took a step backwards, her eyes flickering between the two of them. “So you’re going to take his side? You’re gonna defend him even after what he did?”

“He didn’t do anything wrong,” Alice growled. “He’s suffering just like us. He just lost a friend so of course I’m going to defend him if you’re going to make stupid claims like that! Get a grip on yourself, Rina! You’re not an idiot!”

She flinched back as she had just been struck and stared blankly at Alice. “I’m not an idiot, huh? You think I’m being stupid right now? You’ll see, Alice. You know the truth. Go ahead. Defend him! I don’t want anything to do with him so if you want to stay at his side then you can both burn in hell!”

“Wait, Rina,” Jay rasped, but the girl never heard him as she turned and stalked through the open doorway.

She never came back.

Their friendship ended that very moment, and Rina Davens and Jay Brooks went their separate ways. She never heard them out again. She wouldn’t even look at Jay, and when she glanced at Alice in the halls, it always felt like she was waiting for Alice to come back and get her. But Alice never did and soon enough, high school began, and never interacted with each other again until Christmas of their junior year.

Jay would often think back to that moment as well. He first failed Audrey and then he failed Rina. He let her go and now, she was dead, too. Nigreos Noctis killed her. When she walked through the door, their friendship permanently ended.

He remembered Alice dropping down beside him and wrapping her arms around him, repeating the same thing over and over—though it never truly sank in. He never truly believed it.

“It’s not your fault, Jay.”

***

But it was your fault, wasn’t it? Everything Rina said was true. If you had simply listened and gone home, Audrey would be alive. It was your fault. But you can make things right here. The erased realm has given you that chance. Don’t screw it up, Brooks.

***

When the power of The Angel fully awoke, it didn’t feel the same as when she had cast spells before. She never even spoke incantations as she controlled the shadows that filled the darkened street. The Angel merely moved her limbs and shadow and light moved. Her body could be darkness or it could be light, and sometimes it was both. It was an experience she couldn’t quite put into words. She existed and she didn’t. The Angel controlled her, but she was conscious of everything, making decisions without being sure if they were hers or not. It felt like she was making them, though, and it almost seemed like the Voices had merged with her consciousness.

They were one.

They were the Angel.

She pressed off her back foot, shadows swirling around her right hand and light encircling her left, as she crossed the distance between herself and the nerich in the blink of an eye. The creature hesitated and it was that momentary hesitation that gave Lilly the advantage. She was faster than she ever had been as she sent a silent burst of shadow toward it, hoping to incapacitate it like Nigreos had done to her back in Wilham, but like the Voice of Darkness had warned, it wasn’t as strong due to the monster’s dark nature. The shadows collided with its black form but they failed to get inside of it, and instead wound up sending the nerich back over the side before it could get a better grip on the rooftop railing.

The momentum sent Lilly soaring over with it, but where she would have once been terrified to be plummeting to the ground, the energy surging from her back enabled her to glide down to the road while the nerich smashed into the concrete, black ooze bursting from its body. Lilly didn’t waste time before she’d spun around and sent beams of light flying toward it. This got a strong reaction out of it as it swiftly reoriented itself and sprinted out of the way, causing the bolts to smash into the apartment’s walls.

She knew she would be attracting attention from the nearby residents and that the cops had probably been called because of the shrieking, so she wanted to wrap the fight up as quickly as possible. While exposing magic wasn’t a problem in the erased realm, their actions still had consequences within its reality. If reports of monsters and magic started spreading through the town, it would only complicate their situation and make their escape unnecessarily complex. It would be best to dispose of the nerich fast.

Yet even with The Angel fully awakened, it wasn’t an easy feat. She remembered the speed and agility the nerich displayed during hers and Eric’s flight back during the spring festival and that power was front and center as it dodged her attacks, using the light posts to swing off of and using the buildings as launchpads. Lilly remained in place, controlling her light magic to ward it off while trying numerous times to lock it down with shadows.

I have to do this! I have to beat this thing! For Jay’s sake, I have to free him from this nightmare!

Deciding that remaining in place wasn’t working, Lilly decided to use a similar tactic that Eric had employed all those months ago. Using the power in her back, she pushed off the ground and leapt into the air, going higher than even she realized she could as she landed first on a nearby lamppost then to the roof of the next building over. And when she glanced back over her shoulder, she was pleased to see the nerich in pursuit.

Perfect. Let’s have a little chase again, shall we? Only this time, I’m going to take you down!

When she and Eric had run, their only goal was survival since they didn’t know what they were up against or if they could beat it, but Lilly was both in possession of magic and knew what it was, so it no longer felt hopeless to her. A victory was not only possible but plausible if she played her cards right.

She jumped to the next building and spun around to wait for the nerich to climb up to the top of the other one. Being on the rooftops would make it hard for anybody down below to see them, so it was here that she wanted to finish things. After just a few seconds of waiting, the nerich yanked itself up onto the roof then turned its black eyes toward her, that ever-familiar monstrous grin on its face as it located her. Lilly returned its smile with a challenging one of her own.

“Come and get me,” she hissed.

Without so much as a sound, the nerich broke into a sprint, crossing its roof and launching itself toward her in a matter of seconds and in that time, Lilly had already started to move. Using her now enhanced speed, she hopped to the next building over before spinning around and hurling bolts of light straight for it, hoping to at least wound the creature. But each attack missed, forcing her to turn and run, and this time she pushed herself off to her left, crossing over the street to land on the buildings on the other side.

With the nerich constantly on her heels, Lilly rarely remained in a single spot, constantly moving from roof to roof while occasionally jumping back to the bottom or even using the lamp posts as platforms to stand on. Everything she did, she took out of Eric’s book, knowing that it had worked for him. All he’d needed was a bit more power and that was what she had. Every time she jumped, she brought shadows and light to her arms, shooting everything she could at it in hopes of beating it. Yet nothing was working. The creature was too fast and she was too inexperienced with magic.

But I could… If I just allow more power to go through me… But that could hurt me… If I use too much… Though if it's to save Jay…

For a moment, it felt like her collective consciousness reached an understanding of what might have to happen. If she reached in and used more of The Angel’s power, she could probably incapacitate it, but just like Abi and The Angel had already warned her, her body might not be able to handle it.

It could push her beyond repair.

Then again, my body in the erased realm isn’t the same as my one in the real world. As long as I don’t die, I can suffer whatever pain I need to! It won’t carry over! As long as I don’t die…it doesn’t matter what happens to me!

She hadn’t known that before that very moment, and it felt to her like The Angel had given her guidance. She just needed to win. No matter what happened to her body, as long as her soul remained intact, she could take as much damage as she needed, so she did what she had to do. Lilly turned and vaulted over the side of the roof she was on, gliding down to the street once more with the screams of the nerich right behind her. She knew without having to look that it would pursue her so all she had to do was go with her instincts and let The Angel handle it. The moment her feet hit the ground, Lilly spun around and extended her arms, this time shouting out an incantation.

“Devare!”

The sound that left her lips resembled her voice, but she felt as if she could hear two others screaming with her. The world seemed to stop as she stared up at the nerich, which was midair as it soared down to her, its clawed hands reaching out toward her throat.

But the incantation had done its job.

All the shadows of the night around them lurched toward it, wrapping themselves around its arms and legs and neck, even going through its open mouth. With the entire night turned against it, even a creature of darkness like the nerich didn’t have the power to fight back, yet Lilly knew it was unfortunate that she had to reach that point. The more the shadows shook the creature around, the more pressure she felt inside her. She could see the skin of her arms beginning to crack with blood oozing from within. Similar sensations spread to her legs, torso, and face, as if her body was beginning to burst from the inside.

Now! Take it down now!

With that internal scream, the nerich still thrashing around in the air, she felt The Angel separate from her once again, the power in her back beginning to diminish, and the Voice of Light reply, “On it!”

Lilly’s legs moved on her own as the shadows pulled the nerich closer to the ground where her outstretched hands could press against its chest.

“Iluio,” she uttered.

Light began to form in her hands once again, and this time, the energy surged outward and entered Jay’s body through his mouth, combining with the shadows that held him in place. It engulfed him and soon, the shadows had vanished, leaving only light.

***

Without warning, it felt like a weight was finally being lifted off his shoulders, as if the cloud of darkness within his head was being forcefully ripped out of him. That soothing and hypnotic voice that had been egging him on since he awoke in the erased realm began to get more and more distant. He could still hear it urging him to hurt Lilly, but he didn’t want to, so he rejected it.

Get out of my head. I don’t want you here any more! I don’t want to fight her! I don’t want to kill her! I told you that! I won’t do it!

Then you choose to abandon Alice? You choose to leave her to suffer in the real world? You want to fail in protecting her?

I won't fail. I’ll stay by her side like I promised her. We’ll handle it together… Now go away. I’ve had enough of you!

There was no response from the voice and soon enough, his head felt clear. It was a feeling he hadn’t experienced since the day he jumped from his balcony. There wasn’t anybody in his mind anymore. He was free. It was like he was waking up from an endless nightmare, free of a torment that he thought he’d never escape.

Jay slowly opened his eyes to find his head resting against someone’s shoulder, but he knew without having to look up that it was Lilly whose arms were wrapped around him. Her breathing was ragged and he knew she must have fought hard, yet even though he let that thing take control and hurt her, she still hadn’t abandoned him. Even after all the trouble he had caused her, Lilly Harper had never abandoned him.

“Thank you, Lilly,” he whispered. “I’m sorry for everything.”

“It’s okay, Jay. It’s over now. You’re free. The nerich is gone. I killed it.”

“Yeah… I’m finally free…”