The ticking of the clock was inevitably loud as the four sat in silence.

"Well, might as well try to figure out a solution while we wait," Wei Wuxian broke the silence with a sigh.

He brought both of his hands to cup his chin and with a serious face, he said, "Lan Zhan, Xichen-ge, I have something I need to ask you and I want you two to answer me truthfully."

Both Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji gazed at him. Jiang Wanyin also looked at him.

Wei Wuxian: "Is there any chance that you guys may be related to werewolves?"

"..."

"Family curse?"

Jiang Wanyin rolled his eyes. Honestly, what did he expect when Wei Wuxian pulled out that poker face?

"Wait, wait, wait! How about lycans?" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, flipping over a page of his notepad. "Demons-?"

"Wei Wuxian, shut up if you don't got an idea," Jiang Cheng snapped.

Wei Wuxian fell silent.

A moment passed and Wei Wuxian spoke up again. This time, tentatively. "Well, we can always try that method."

Jiang Wanyin glanced over and met the other's eyes. "What method."

"The irrational one," Wei Wuxian replied.

"..."

Wei Wuxian casually took out a pair of scissors.

"..."

Both Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng gulped indistinctly.

Lan Wangji: ...

Wait-

Wei Wuxian spoke as he wiped the blade of the scissors on the corner of his shirt. "You know, we can just try and see if it hurts. We can always dye the hair black but unless Lan Zhan and Xichen-ge want to pursue a career as one of those cat boys on Douyin, those ears gonna need to go somehow."

Jiang Cheng: "..."

Jiang Wanyin agreed.

No, not with Wei Wuxian barbarically cutting off his boyfriend's ears but that those wolf ears needed to come off. Although he would much prefer a more professional person to do it. Anyone but Wei Wuxian.

Yet, Wei Wuxian scooted himself over to Lan Xichen. Lan Xichen's eyes widened as he saw Wei Wuxian approach him with the gleaming scissors in his hand.

"Xichen-ge," Wei Wuxian said sweetly. "Tell me if this hurts-

Wei Wuxian was interrupted by a hand that flew across his vision, creating a division between him and Lan Xichen.

"Wait," Jiang Wanyin hissed, his arm outstretched, "Why must Lan Huan go first?"

Wei Wuxian blinked. Then he laughed awkwardly. "What are you talking about, Jiang Cheng? No one's going first, we are just testing right now if it's going to work."

Jiang Wanyin snarled, "Well then, since it's your idea, why don't you test it out on your little boyfriend over there?"

Wei Wuxian opened his mouth. Then he closed it. "Okay, maybe this isn't such a good idea," he admitted.

Jiang Wanyin glared at him. Now it wasn't a good idea??

(WWX: we need to sacrifice one man.

JC: We volunteer Lan Wangji.

WWX: We no longer need to sacrifice one man.

A/N: sorry, I just have to.)

Before Wei Wuxian could germinate yet another questionable idea, there was a knock on the door.

Relieved that he wasn't going to have a surgical removal operation done to him by a definitely unqualified person while being completely and totally conscious, Lan Xichen got up and said, "I'll get it." Really, Wanyin might have really saved his life this time.

...

Opening the door, Lan Xichen was greeted by Xie Lian, who was wearing a white v-neck collar shirt and wheat-colored pants. Sitting in his arms with their arms around Xie Lian's neck was a mini Hua Cheng.

Little Hua Cheng turned their head and their eyes gaze at Lan Xichen and traveled up before landing his stare on the peculiar wolf ears atop of Lan Xichen's head. Mini Hua Cheng raised an eyebrow. Lan Xichen felt a bit uncomfortable being stared down by a little toddler.

"Um, hey," Xie Lian said, sounding like he didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "Um, oh... wow," he then said as he spotted Lan Xichen's white hair and ears. "Erm... wow."

"You know, if everyone's reaction is like Xie-xiong's, maybe we don't have to worry that much," Wei Wuxian said as he and Jiang Wanyin joined the scene. Lan Wangji followed behind Wei Wuxian.

Xie Lian's eyes grew a bit wider as he saw that Lan Wangji also was... um, different.

"..."

They all looked at each other.

"I guess... None of you guys turned into toddlers," Xie Lian laughed awkwardly.

Jiang Wanyin grimaced.

Then-

"Gege, they all look weird and ugly. San Lang's scared," little Hua Cheng said in a haughty voice. The voice was like a kid's, more acute than that of an adult's. Mini San Lang buried his face in the curve of Xie Lian's neck.

Wei Wuxian: "Hey..."

Wei Wuxian: "Hua-xiong, you still have your memories!"

"Go away," Hua Cheng's muffled tot voice said from Xie Lian's neck.

Wei Wuxian laughed out loud. "Haha! Hey, Jiang Cheng, you don't happen to have baby formula around, hm?" Wei Wuxian snickered.

Jiang Cheng replied, "Do I look like I plan to have a baby soon?"

Wei Wuxian answered honestly, "No." Then he turned around and clapped his hands, saying, "Xiao Huahua, come to Gege!"

Jiang Wanyin rolled his eyes as Xiao Huahua said surly, "Who are you to call yourself Gege, I only have one Gege."

Wei Wuxian pouted at him as the toddler ignored him in perfect Hua Cheng fashion and hugged his gege tighter.

"Hey, are you sure Hua-xiong didn't lose his memory? Hua-xiong, it's me, your favorite, Wei Ying!" Wei Wuxian wailed.

Xie Lian didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Giving little Hua Cheng a bounce in his arms, he said, "So...

"Have Shen-xiong or Luo-xiong called?" Wei Wuxian asked.

Xie Lian furrowed his eyebrows before he answered, "No, do you think they might also have, you know-?"

Wei Wuxian shrugged. "I mean, all of us have, why wouldn't they?" Then his eyes lit up, "Hey, do you think Luo-xiong's gonna turn up with wolf ears or be a baby?? Oh gosh, I hope it's the latter, Luo-xiong looked very cute when he was a baby! I've seen his baby photos-! Quick, somebody call them."

Lan Wangji: "......"

"First of all, why are you excited about Luo Binghe turning into anything," Jiang Cheng began, "And second of all, why are you so sure that it's Luo Binghe that has changed."

Wei Wuxian rolled his eyes at him. "Well, if we are going to suffer, we might as well suffer together, and besides, of course, it'll be Luo-xiong! Haven't you noticed a pattern here?" Wei Wuxian responded to him.

He then turned and took out his phone from his pocket.

"Let me just call them."

。。。。。。

Shen Qingqiu sat on the sofa, an elbow propped on the armrest, his other hand ruffling the hair of Luo Binghe who wedged himself between Shen Yuan's legs, hugging his waist and laying the side of his head on the former's stomach. Both men had their eyes on the bright TV screen in front of the sofa.

They were watching Shen Qingqiu's favorite wuxia drama, for which he was watching for the nth time but the first time for Luo Binghe.

"Watch, here's the exciting part," Shen Yuan said, jutting his chin at the TV. Luo Binghe hummed in response and Shen Qingqiu gave him another pat on the head.

The TV started with some heroic music as the male lead dramatically leaped out from the sky and saved his lover, slitting all the enemies' throats with a fan before it spun back to him.

Luo Binghe: "..."

Luo Binghe: "Shen Yuan-ge, how come he had time to put on red eyeliner-? Isn't this rather overly dramatic."

Shen Yuan: "Hush, Binghe, just enjoy looking at their good-looking faces. It's not like you aren't that dramatic."

Luo Binghe lifted his head and looked up at Shen Qingqiu from Shen Qingqiu's abdomen. He said with a profound face, "But if I want to look at good-looking people, I'll stare at Shen Yuan-ge's face all day."

"There you go again," Shen Qingqiu said, reaching out and pinching the other's cheeks.

Then the phone rang and Shen Qingqiu had to pick it up.

"Hello?"

"..."

Luo Binghe looked curiously at Shen Qingqiu's face which was changing expressions every few seconds. Who's he talking to?

"Um, you are joking," Shen Qingqiu said to the phone, staring at Luo Binghe. "No, Binghe's obviously normal."

Luo Binghe scooted closer to Shen Qingqiu and Shen Qingqiu reached out a hand and tickled him under the chin.

"Alright, I don't exactly believe you but Binghe and I will go over there."

Shen Qingqiu hung up with a blank face.

"Let's go, Binghe."

"Where to, Yuan-ge?"

Shen Qingqiu shrugged. "Jiang Wanyin's house. Apparently, your Hua-xiong turned into a baby."

Luo Binghe: "..."

Luo Binghe: "Huh?"

。。。。。。

"This is strange... Very strange!"

"Yeah, we obviously all know that."

Jiang Wanyin rolled his eyes at Wei Wuxian's stupid observation.

Wei Wuxian turned to look at him. "Luo-xiong's completely normal!" he exclaimed.

They were all sitting in Jiang Wanyin's room in a circle again. Except for little Hua Cheng who was sitting in his Gege's lap, totally satisfied.

"Yeah, thanks for pointing out the obvious," Jiang Wanyin said sarcastically.

Shen Qingqiu stared at all of them. He wanted to rub his eyes with his fists and then opened his eyes as wide as he could, gaping at all of them. Are these really his friends or are they aliens? Should he take Binghe and make a run for it?

Lan Xichen looked stressed out. Uh oh, that's not good.

"You know, I was having a very good day before this happened," Wei Wuxian said.

Jiang Wanyin: "I think we all were."

"So how can we solve this?" Luo Binghe asked. "No offense but..."

"But?"

"... nevermind."

Wei Wuxian sighed.

Xie Lian spoke up. "Maybe we should first find the cause of this."

Wei Wuxian nodded. "Ooh, yeah! That's smart, Xie-ge! So has anyone offended an old lady lately? Or made a deal with the devil?"

Everyone: "......"

Hua Cheng: "You guys can't tell we are dreaming?"

"........"

Everyone turned to stare at the little Hua Cheng.

Mini Hua Cheng stared back at all of them, undaunted.

At last Wei Wuxian spoke.

"Oh. That makes sense."

Does it?

"Wait, then who's dreaming?"

They may never know.