《I just want to be small - ZIAM.》Thirty six ✧ ೃ༄
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Zayn was awoken to the sound of a notification pinging repeatedly on his phone every five minutes, the cold, metallic device shaking ever so slightly against the wooden side table at each notif. At first, he was quite annoyed with the repetitive buzz - until he actually acknowledged what it was - It was a notification that didn't happen often, it was one that meant his letter box was full. This could only mean one thing: the little gear that Liam had ordered yesterday for him had arrived and was sat down in the front office behind a keypad which only he could unlock.
Though, his letterbox being full meant he had to get up out of Liam's warm, cozy bed and pull himself away from the opposite boy's intimate, healing touch. He didn't want to do that at the moment, he was enjoying the morning snuggles but his phone was stressing him out, he had to get up whether he wanted to or not. He was beyond excited, no doubt, but too exhausted to get up and do everyday things, he was still recovering from both the hangover and the emotional rollercoaster that he went through with Louis barging in as he was in little space.
"Ughhh." He groaned, eyes peeking towards the opposite boy who was intertwined around him. He hoped Liam would wake up and grab it for him if he shared the private letterbox code but the lad was still fast asleep, Zayn was starting to get convinced that Liam could sleep through a zombie apocalypse and still not stir. In fact, he was sure of it. With a whine, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He slipped on some crocs, making sure they were in safety mode and brushed his hair back so he was slightly more presentable - it didn't make much difference however because he was still in his clothes from yesterday and his hair was visibly greasy.
Not feeling the greatest about himself, he shoved on an oversized hoodie. He had always wanted his own pacifier, he had shared one of Harry's but it just didn't feel right. He wanted his own and now he has his own, he just needed to get off his arse and collect it. He's excited for the bottle Liam had bought him too, he can just imagine himself wrapped up in the larger boys arms with the bottle tight to his lips full of lavender milk after a tough day of being big. He wanted it so sighing softly, he made his way down to the front office and presented the receptionist brightly with his name. The woman then proceeded to ask for the code, to which Zayn responded with and was soon handed a small pile of packages that he ran upstairs and dropped gently onto his unmade bed.
Joining them, the small boy sat cross legged and delicately ripped open the neatly wrapped parcel. The first parcel was much smaller to which Zayn knew this would be the pacifier, he was proven correct when the soft, baby blue dummy fell out against the plush covers. Liam had chosen it for him and it was exactly what he wanted, just what he had described when asking for it: blue with a paw print and sparkles. What he didn't expect though, was the 'Little Pup' tag which Liam had chosen to be added onto it - that just made him love it even more. It was perfect. Faintly blushing, the little took the paci over to the sink and cleansed it to ensure any icky bacteria wasn't infesting it, once that was done he pushed it between his lips and sucked on it shyly. Rubbing his eyes and taking it out, he already felt safe with it.
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"You like it?" Liam hummed, sitting up and watching Zayn. The boy jumped slightly, not realising the caregiver was awake. "Oh.. I didn't- Yeah. Didn't realise you were awake."
"It's alright, love. I've only been awake like two minutes." He smiled, stretching. His hair falling in front of his face, reminding him that he should probably get it cut soon. "You got college this afternoon?"
Zayn nodded, "Yeah, an' then it's the weekend which I'm excited for. Got coursework to catch up on."
"I truly don't know anyone else who would be excited for coursework," he chuckled, voice raspy and thick with sleep still, "The dummy suits you. The colour. It's so Zaynie."
"So Zaynie?" The boy laughed, his eyes crinkling at the sides and his lips upturned into the brightest smile imaginable. Liam thought it was well and truly adorable, he also thought he shouldn't be thinking this about Zayn but then he supposed it didn't matter because he was clearly whipped for the tiny and it wasn't changing anytime soon. "Yeah. Blue. It's your colour."
Zayn nodded, thinking about what Liam's colour would be if he was a colour. He then very quickly decided on yellow, or at least maybe orange. He was indecisive, yellow is bright, it's like the sun. The sun makes him happy, just as Liam does... But Liam is also warm and orange is a warm colour. He was unsure. Liam was like a sunset. "Your colour is like yellow to me, Liam. Or well. I'm indecisive.. I guess if you mix every colour of the sunset together, it makes you."
"Well that's quite nice, Zayn. I would imagine myself to be red or something though, I don't quite know why. You're the artist in the room though, so I take it your choice makes much more sense than mine will. Gonna get your bottle out anyway? Maybe you could have one before class... Only if you wanted to, of course?" Liam asked, getting up. He opened the blinds so that the sun shone in against the cluttered room. He then began to make his bed which Zayn thought was much unlike him but didn't question it, nodding. "Yeah.. Maybe. That does sound quite good... I was thinkin' about havin' a bottle earlier.. But, yeah..."
"You can have one. Whatever you like. I'm sure we have milk in, if that's what you want... Juice too." Liam reassured, sitting back on his neatly tidied bed, creasing it back up again. His body sinking gently into the soft mattress, he crossed his legs and watched Zayn as the lad picked up the final package. Opening it, the bottle was a soft blue and matched the pacifier perfectly. It was covered in stars, all different shapes in a range of cool, blue shades. Zayn's name was engraved on the bottle with a blue acrylic; he was in shock. Liam had gone all out to make this perfect for him, it was more than what he even asked for. Liam was too good for him. "Say's m' name."
"It does. You like it?" Liam asked, smiling quite shyly himself. He wanted the bottle to be special to him, he wanted Zayn to have something for his little space that was proudly personal and his. "Y'uh uh. Love it. Ta' Liam."
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"All welcome. Now, I've got an idea... How about you get ready for your lecture, Hm? Get into your clothes for the day and prepare your bag, I'll make you some breakfast and some food to take with you. I'll wash and fill your bottle up too, is there anything specific you want in it?" The caregiver said, his voice soft, caring and gentle. Zayn was so sure that if the man continued with that sweet voice, he would be slipping in seconds and that wasn't a good fact at all, knowing he had a lecture within the next hour and he already skipped yesterdays.
"Mm. I always wanted lavender milk to try.. But we don't have any and it would probably make me sleepy. Maybe just.. apple juice. Please." Zayn asked, voice all polite. He stood in front of his wardrobe, on his tip toes which wasn't necessary but doing so felt right, and picked out an outfit for the day. Nice and simple, some baggy jeans, a personal fave, and a tank top. He paired it with some New Balances and a Vivienne Westwood dupe chain. He couldn't afford the real thing but it pretty much passed as it, so he didn't really care. He sprayed himself with some aftershave he had bought from 'Savers' and sorted his bag out. Making sure that he hadn't forgot his lanyard or else they wouldn't let him on site.
Meanwhile, Liam prepared Zayn some toast with butter and strawberry jam on it, taking his time to ensure that it was pristine for the tiny. He cut it up into four separate slices so that they could easily be held without getting sticky jam on his fingers, and washed the bottle clean, filling it up with apple juice and tightening the lid. "All done, Z."
"Ta." The boy grinned, skipping over to the dining area. He took a seat on the chilly stool, his legs swinging back and fourth almost instantly as if it was an automatic impulse when having room to swing them. "Thanks for cutting them up like that, Li." The boy blushed, he'd always hoped for something like this and now he's got it. Happy is an understatement.
"You're so entirely welcome, little one." Liam smiled, his eyes twinkling in the sunlight. "Does a chicken sandwich sound good for later? I'll put in some carrot sticks and crisps as well."
"That's more than perfect, thank you for caring for me like this... Makes everything much easier and less stressful." Zayn said quietly, his mouth full of toast. "No need to thank me, I enjoy doing this for you and it makes me happy knowing you're getting the nutrients you need inside that tummy of yours."
The small boy blushed, taking another bite of the toast. The butter and jam combo was such a perfect duo combined with the warm toast, Liam was good at this. "I'll pop the food into your bag so I know it's not forgotten."
"Thank you. You're too sweet." Zayn whined, watching him. Liam was literally being the most perfect caregiver he could ever ask for right now, truly everything he had ever dreamed of and Zayn believed that he wouldn't ever be over the acknowledgment of realising how they are now compared to what they were a month or two ago. "Enough with the compliments." The taller boy teased, standing behind Zayn and wrapping his arms around him.
The little picked up the bottle and sucked on it, the juice falling into his mouth, satisfying him nicely. All shy with Liam's eyes on him, the bottle felt so natural to him and he loved how soft it was. He wondered why it was societally wrong to not have bottles like this in public? He believed everyone should be able to experience the ease of sucking on a baby's bottle. "Awww. Will make sure there is some lavender milk for when you get home."
"Ugh. Too good!" Zayn whined and Liam hushed him with his finger, chuckling. Zayn calmed down and finished up his toast, "Yum, yum. All gone." He held up his hands to show Liam that he had eaten it all and the man gave him a thumbs up. Zayn grinned, feeling equivalent to how a dog would feel when being praised for being a 'Good boy'.
"Reckon Chase would like to go in your bag with you, what do you think?" Liam suggested which made Zayn's eyes instantly light up. "Oh yes!" The boy got up quickly and grabbed him from the nightstand, tucking them in the front pocket of his bag for easy access. "They fit in there nicely."
"That's good to hear. Still gotta work on getting you a big Chase teddy, don't we? Maybe we could find one at the weekend."
"Maybe.. But little Chase is good for now. I love him." He smiled, finishing up his apple juice. He put on his coat, zipping it up and standing the empty bottle in the sink. "My coat sleeves are a bit long." He wafted them about, making Liam laugh. He always wondered why Zayn chose optionally to buy clothes bigger than the size he actually was because now he's left in the situation of having a coat that he is physically drowning in. Liam rolled up his sleeves, "Better?"
"Better." He smiled, putting his backpack on, groaning at how heavy it was. He was positive he had overpacked like usual but he never knows what he might need. "All ready."
"Have a good day, alright? I'll come collect ya later if you want?" Liam asked, standing on his heels. Zayn shyly nodded, playing with his hands "Please."
"Alright. I'll be there. See you later, Zaynie."
"See you later... Daddy." He blushed, stepping out the door. Ready to face the day ahead of him.
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