《All The Dead Sinners》Couldn't conquer the blue sky (3)
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"Have you gone mad?" The princess asked, in a quiet voice.
Yes.
It was natural for her to think so.
After all, he had put the sword to her neck. And he hadn't stopped there. He'd grabbed her and turned her around unceremoniously, squeezing her shoulders hard, digging his nails in.
Under normal circumstances, he would have called himself crazy for doing something like that or even just considering doing it to the princess of Albion of all possible people. But these weren't normal circumstances… No. He wasn't used to this, it's true. But they were normal circumstances. It was the normality of what the rest of his life would consist of, having chosen to live by Abigail's side.
This girl... for she was no more than that, a girl even younger than him....
She was nothing to him.
Nothing.
Abigail was the only person he served. Therefore, he didn't have to mince his actions, for that reason...
"Let go of me," she ordered him, twisting uselessly in his grip. No matter how strong she was, he would always be stronger. Not than her. Than anyone. That was what she was for... her affinity, after all, she supposed.
"I said let go."
If it weren't for the fear, she'd be screaming.
Fear? Maybe it wasn't even about that, really. Maybe she wasn't scared, though she should be.
Because she was used to people obeying her. Life had taught her that she would always get her way. And she didn't think there were any exceptions to the rule. Not a single exception. Maybe she hadn't started yelling because she honestly believed he would throw down his sword and "come to his senses." Unfortunately for her, he had no intention of putting down his sword. This was his only option.
The best he could do. He couldn't have gotten himself a better hostage. He needed her to get Abigail out of here, so that Albion wouldn't get their filthy hands on her.
"Walk," he ordered, curtly.
Charlotte hesitated, but began to walk toward the door, following his orders. Very still. And very quiet.
She was beginning to understand her situation, it seemed. That could be a good thing. And bad, at the same time. At least as long as she foolishly believed he would come to his senses, that he couldn't challenge her, so she wasn't in any danger, then she wouldn't seriously oppose him.
But...
What could she do, now that she had already allowed him to lay his hands on her? What did she have in her power?
Nothing.
Charlotte was not the one he had to fear. At least not for the moment. Only for the moment.
They went through the door.
"What do you think you're doing?" she asked, again in a low voice. Rather, still in a low voice.
But he noticed the tension in her voice.
Desmond was silent. He had no need to answer that. It wouldn't do him any good at all.
They passed down the hallway, walking at a slow but steady pace.
Through the glass of the doors and the doors that were open, he saw rows and rows of sickbeds.
Not all of them were unoccupied. But most were. He had been taken to the infirmary.
And, as for Abigail.....
A sharp shake.
The infirmary wasn't in a building, but on a ship. A ship on the move. It had to be.
Well... This will make things more difficult.
Or the other way around, actually.
If they were in the middle of the city... the capital or any other city.... Well, he'd already tried that in Kronos, and they'd gotten out of that one by sheer luck.
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Because the princess and her forces had rescued them, surely.
He hadn't counted on doing any better in a city of his own.
Especially after all that effort and sacrifice. He had had time to recover, it was true, but he was still far from well.
He wasn't ready to face a situation on the same scale.
But if it was only to escape from this ship.... If they managed to lose them, hide somewhere....
"What are you thinking about?"
"Shut the hell up," Desmond said, gritting his teeth.
"Even if I keep my mouth shut, it's only a matter of time before someone notices, sees you."
Yes. Of course.
He didn't even need to say it.
"All the more reason for you to shut up right now."
Even if his silence only bought him a few extra seconds, a few seconds could make all the difference.
They left the infirmary.
Desmond rounded the corner, started up the stairs.
"Princess, how did it go...?"
The words and the breathing of that someone at the top of the stairs were cut off as soon as Desmond stepped into the light.
Revealing the prize in his arms.
"Princess!"
Charlotte's silence, unfortunately, hadn't bought him much time.
Now... it was going to get complicated.
But not out of his control. After all, he had the best possible trump card.
As long as he had Charlotte in his possession, they would do what he wanted.
They couldn't afford to lose the last member of Albion's royal family. Before she produced an heir. And before said heir grew up, at least.
Even after... It would be a great blow to lose Charlotte.
Desmond armed himself with determination.
Desmond went up the stairs, unafraid.
"Don't do anything foolish," said Charlotte.
Desmond found himself surrounded by Albion soldiers. Or personal guards of the princess.
They all looked at him as if he were an enemy.
As if he was a threat. And he was, he was, but.... He wasn't to blame.
If only you had let us be. If you'd known how to let it go...
But they didn't.
No one, anywhere in the world, was capable of resisting the temptation of apparently overcoming death.
But what would be the point of living a life that wasn't worth living?
On that, he agreed with Abigail.
He would love to live forever if he could do so with Abigail. However, that was not possible. For him to be immortal, Abigail had to die and pass his curse.
... So it wasn't worth it.
Not at all.
"Princess."
"The princess."
Murmurs followed him.
They didn't let him out of their sight for a second, but still none of them had taken a single step forward.
Desmond swallowed.
He took a deep breath, gathering air, gathering strength.
He screamed at the top of his lungs.
He shouted the name of the person most important to him.
There was no response.
Not one... physical, so to speak, not one in his head.
He could hear his heart beating. He felt them firmly against his chest, in his chest. But that no longer meant alive. He could hear them now, somehow, for some reason, even when she was dead.
And it had never meant she was alive AND could answer him.
She could be alive and unconscious.
Locked away somewhere.
If they'd... If they've done anything to her, he thought, shaking with rage. He wasn't able to finish the thought.
He called Abigail several times.
Every time without hearing an answer.
He, well, they went out to the main deck.
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Enemies.
The only thing that awaited him were enemies, who were prepared to finish him off immediately, to protect the future of their kingdom....
"Stop! By the order of your princess, halt at once!"
Men and women lowered their hands.
Some took a step back. Some shoulders slumped.
Desmond wasn't dealing with dogs of the Empire. Terrible as they were, they were at least predictable, in a way. But these men were all mages. Hundreds of affinities. Hundreds of possible ways to attack, without him being able to see it coming. He wasn't in control of the situation, there was only the illusion of having it. It was like a mirage. It could slip through his hands at any moment.
Desmond... I'm here.
He felt her voice like an electric shock. His back jerked, he turned in the direction of the source of the sound.
Desmond started up, again.
"You're heading toward where she is, all of a sudden. How do you know?" Charlotte questioned him. He'd like to know himself, frankly. He supposed it was just another change in the list. That he could now like… Feel it. Feel her. Regardless, he didn't respond to the little girl, of course. One way or another, he wouldn't waste oxygen on her.
He would only say the minimum necessary.
"Wait a minute. Stop, Desmond," Charlotte told him.
He ignored her, of course.
"I'll have her brought here! Okay?
Desmond stopped, this time. He contemplated it. But not for long.
He nodded his head.
"All right?" She wanted to make sure, then. She was terrified. He felt... not guilty, but.... It wasn't a nice feeling, causing that kind of sensation in someone like her.
Not at all.
Someone like me, someone... Someone human.
Then he thought, for no reason, of that legless woman, holding her crushed child.
He also remembered the other one.
The one whose skull was caved in, but who had kept moving forward. Trying to the end.
Not to save herself.
No, not that.
Save her child.
"You heard me," Charlotte said. A couple of soldiers set off.
He watched them go, wondering if he had made a mistake.
But mostly...
His mind was still stuck on that nonsense.
Those women and...
He didn't finish the thought, fortunately for him.
Those things weren't human beings. They were animals. They were demons. They knew nothing of love.
Charlotte, on the other hand, was a human like him.
So...
It was natural that he felt guilty, that he didn't like doing this.
But, about before...
What happened in the capital, his tumultuous feelings.... That hadn't been natural at all....
He had been... confused... simply...
That was all.
As he waited...
A burst of fire. His first instinct was as what he would have done in literally any other situation.
Move the sword, deflect the attack.
But if he moved the sword, even if it was only a few inches away from the princess's neck....
Things would surely get out of his control.
So what he did, was, quite simply....
Turn, with Charlotte in his arms, dodging the blast of fire.
The mage who had fired was knocked to the ground. Not by an attack of his own. One of his comrades had punched him hard enough to knock him over.
"Stupid son of a bitch! You could have hit the princess."
Silence. A tense silence.
Maybe everyone was expecting him, even Charlotte herself, to slit the princess's throat after that.
Unceremoniously.
He was angry, of course.
But he wasn't stupid enough to do something like that.
More importantly, he didn't want to do it. He didn't want to see her dead.
Even if his main allegiance wasn't to Albion anymore, but Abigail, that didn't mean he wanted his kingdom to be hurt, or ruined even.
It meant that he would burn it to the ground with his bare hands, if it was necessary to save Abigail.
But no more and no less than that.
Killing Charlotte would be stupid and unnecessary.
"I trust there will be no more foolishness," Desmond said.
He didn't raise his voice much.
In fact, his voice could perhaps be considered too low.
But all those gathered there heard it clearly.
No, there would be no more of that.
At least for the time being.
——
Abigail arrived, at last. Two soldiers, those two, had brought her to him. They were holding her. Treating her as if...
"Let her go. Right now."
Abigail could free herself at any time, of course, if she wanted to.
It wasn't that easy to keep her locked up.
She was making physical contact with both guards, so she could set them on fire with a thought.
Still, he didn't like seeing her treated that way.
She deserved more.
Much more.
The guards obeyed. But only when Princess Charlotte echoed their command.
"Now let the princess go," one of the assembled enemies said.
He wasn't in Desmond's field of vision and didn't bother to look for him. It didn't make any difference anyway. He probably wasn't even someone important.
Just another soldier. Just the first one who had dared to open his mouth.
In response, Desmond smiled.
"What, so you can jump on us? And gut us like jackals?" Desmond shook his head, "No, I'm afraid not. It won't work that way."
"What do you want?
"What do you...? That's funny," he added, laughing half-heartedly. "I don't think anyone's ever asked me that. What do I want? What I've always wanted. Always. To be happy and for you to leave me... To be left alone! You won't stop looking for us under any circumstances. I won't make you promise me that, they're empty words. But we will get out of here. And you will do absolutely nothing to stop us."
They didn't reply. Of course.
They were waiting, all of them, for the princess's answer. Watching and waiting.
An answer that soon came.
"Soldiers, get down. Swear to me on your honor that you won't lift a finger against Desmond and his companion. Under no circumstances."
"But, princess..."
"You heard me!" She lost her composure.
And they obeyed. It was the only thing they could do.
Nausea.
He didn't feel proud of, well, the pride and sense of duty of these 'knights'.
He just felt nauseous.
"So desperate to keep your life, huh?" Desmond whispered to Charlotte's hatred. "Tell me, is this the first time you've ever felt fear? The first time, after all these years, really?"
"My life?"
Charlotte, to his surprise, burst out laughing with no concern in her voice. As if he'd actually said something funny.
Hysterical, she's hysterical, he thought. Only it wasn't true at all.
He knew it.
Her laughter was pure. It expressed what was there, no more, no less. No hidden side.
Some soldiers looked at the princess as if she had gone mad. Others kept their heads on the ground.
Jaws clenched, fists clenched.
Trembling.
All over the place.
"You haven't listened to me from the beginning. You haven't let me finish. Will you do it now?"
Desmond didn't answer at all.
"Whatever, I guess. My life... it doesn't matter at all. Because royal blood runs through my veins. And I have a responsibility to devote everything to my people. Body and mind. Even my soul. A monarch is the least free person on the entire planet. If I thought it was for the best, I'd let you slit my throat right here."
"But?"
"But... You misunderstand me. I have no intention of hurting you. Neither you nor your partner."
"You just said you'd do anything for your people," Abigail interjected. She shifted her position. "No, that you must."
"I have. But the best decision is not always, or even often, the most cruel decision. That would say horrible things about human nature. Things I don't believe in."
"Get to the point," Desmond said.
"Put that sword down. Or turn me around, at least," Charlotte said. "Let me look you in the eye while I talk."
And, though Desmond knew it was crazy....
Desmond did it, without giving it much thought. If he had thought about it, he would never have done it in the first place.
"Desmond!" Abigail scolded him for his utter stupidity. But it was too late, of course. Too late...
Charlotte didn't take the opportunity to try to get free.
Instead, she knelt down in front of him.
"I need your help. That's the truth and the only thing I want."
Desmond looked down. Their eyes met.
Was she... being sincere? I mean, he had a feeling she was, but couldn't say for sure.
For her, surely, lying would be as natural as breathing.
Not just with words.
No, nothing like that. With her whole body.
However, to go so far... To kneel... To put herself at his mercy again....
The tip of his sword brushed Charlotte's neck, again. There was no resistance. She was staring at him, without hesitation.
"I have spies on the inside. They informed me of your companion... the one they call witch. What she can do. And you. That's why I mobilized my troops. That's why... I've thought ever since then that you are the key."
"The key?"
"Of the future of this kingdom and its people. As things stand... "Charlotte swallowed hard. "As things stand, sooner or later the Azure Empire will win. It is inevitable."
Desmond was speechless.
To hear her admit something like that... so easily....
Something that had never even crossed his mind, never in his life.
I mean, they were hard to deal with.
But they were... they were abominations....
They were untouched by divine grace. Therefore, it was impossible for them to impose themselves upon the creations of the gods.
It should be impossible for such a thing to happen.
But...
She said it... she said it with such regret. And finality. As if she was seeing it, happening before her very eyes.
Or already had.
"It may not be during my reign. My children and grandchildren may not see that fateful day. But it will come. The only question is when. And it's not right, it's not right at all to pretend it's not our problem! To pretend it's enough to survive, and leave that problem to future generations! This has to end! Right here, right now!"
Abigail stood to the side. Arms crossed over her chest, watching everything as if it had nothing to do with her. Expressionless.
As if she was watching... something that had already happened. Repeating itself in front of her eyes.
An echo.
But he...
Desmond lowered his sword. Its tip touched the ground, and he wasn't afraid.
"I certainly admire your fervor. There should be more people like you in this world. And you have great ideals. But I refuse. I will no longer fight in this war. Because this is not my war. As far as I'm concerned, you can kill each other. Until there's no one left. As long as you leave us alone."
"But the world doesn't work like that. At least, it's not easy. You know they don't rest... and now I tell you I can make it happen."
Desmond's body tensed as if he had received a physical shock.
"That's right," Charlotte said, responding, as if he had said something. He guessed he didn't need to open his mouth. "I can do it. And I will. Give you the life you want...with the person you love.... A house to live in. And normalcy, plain and simple. Not having to be on the run all the time."
"You don't have to listen to her," Abigail said. "Come on, Desmond. I've heard enough false promises."
She said not to listen to the princess, but how could he not?
With all she was promising him. And that was the point, of course, an attractive offer. It didn't have to be true. It had to make real sense.
But she... he thought she...
Desmond felt like he was wobbling. He didn't look for a grip on anything. The feeling was fleeting, fortunately.
Desmond's mouth was suddenly very dry.
"But?"
"But that's only half the equation, as you well know. Even if I let you live in peace, the Azure Empire never will. They won't rest. Never. Not until..."
"Until every last one of them is dead."
Hadn't he said it himself before, in a past that now seemed painfully distant?
That this was a war that wouldn't end until one side was annihilated to the last man?
Charlotte's gaze was heavy, powerful.
She couldn't look away.
"What’s your decision?"
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