The next few days passed surprisingly fast and Jano spent it oscillating between trying to hide as much as possible from Dariea, and training with Robin. Not that it was particularly difficult, as Dariea was once more busy with the complicated display of departure. In general, the barracks and town seemed to be in a total state of upheaval as the Chaos-Shapers were rushing around and preparing to leave. According to Robin, Dariea was busy with several diplomatic meetings with the senior commanders of the Chaos-Shapers and the representatives of Goshnia. Robin had shown her face at one or two, but in general she was happy to avoid the mess and train with him. Dariea hadn’t spoken to Jano much more than a general greeting or goodbye as their paths crossed. If he was being honest, he preferred it that way. The images of the Chaos test were still burned into his consciousness.

At night he dreamed of the final trial over and over again. Different sections each night, and each time it seemed more surreal than the last. Everytime the chaos succeeded in its invasion. He became a puppet. Nothing more than a marionette to do the bidding of a belligerent force. He felt its presence take control of him and through him, it delivered destruction. It granted him more power than he had ever dreamed of, yet all he did was destroy. Each time he asked the chaos why him, but he never received a reply. When it did speak, it simply repeated ‘let me in’. It made him shudder to think of it.

He’d had time to reflect on the trials and the feeling of the chaos trying to rule through him. He still found it difficult to explain to Robin when she had asked and so she stopped asking. He wanted to explain in the hope that figuring out how he was feeling might give him some control. Ultimately he knew himself what the problem was, he just couldn’t express it to others yet. It was the fear of the chaos essence using him for its own ends. It was the idea that he might fail in all he had yet to accomplish by not understanding the very thing he hoped to achieve those goals with. A betrayal almost. Though that wasn’t the full problem. It was that he was naive enough to believe he could do what he had set out to do. It wasn’t even that he wasn’t good enough now. It was that he never would be.

As much as he struggled internally, the exact opposite seemed to happen in training. He threw himself into it with everything he had. The training was tough, but he enjoyed the progress and it kept his mind off the other things. Stone essence was becoming much more natural, even more so than it had been when he was using Eradin’s power. His shield was coming along, almost full armour now. With the last of it still to cross his torso. He was meditating on the nature of the essence and the runes for the shield each night. He felt like he knew how to progress now. That he was understanding it all. He had begun with the Stone Spears technique and again, it seemed to come quicker to his call than ever before.

In Goshnia itself, the Chaos-Shapers were almost ready to leave. Their barracks had been ransacked and everything was now neatly piled up on several huge carts pulled by a mixture of several horses, Gippies and giant woolen creatures called Hirocs. The Hirocs had black tusks sticking out of their mouths and looked so fierce that Jano had kept his distance. There was no need to do so, as they were harmless. The Goshnians had a long history of taming the creatures to the point that even those in the wild knew not to attack a human. Robin stroked one while passing by, but he kept his distance.

Jano thought there may be more of a fuss while pulling an occupying force out of such a place, but things seemed to be moving relatively smoothly despite the madness. He overheard some citizens discussing the matter that after ten years, some in Goshnia saw it as a natural progression. It was time to stand on their own two feet. The countervailing opinion was that they had just reached a point of stability and that the Chaos-Shapers leaving could encourage a descent back into the power struggles of old.

Jano didn’t know which of those would be true. He didn’t want this almost idyllic place to fall back because of some petty squabbles about who should rule. Life was interesting here and it was a place he could imagine returning. When he wasn’t plagued with nightmares, he allowed himself to dream of what life might be like here with Alsace. With him developing his own power he could perhaps carve out a living for himself, though there was a distinct lack of stone buildings. He was sure he’d be able to find something to do. Him and his wife were both hard workers after all. He winced a little every time he thought of his wife and the pain didn’t lessen over time. Rather it was a dull sensation he carried with him wherever he went. He pictured her pulled close to him, the taste of her kiss and the warmth of her body washing against his. He longed for her. Each time he allowed himself to dream was a brief respite against the intrusive thoughts of the trial, but each time it opened a festering wound within him. It was never long before he pushed it away. Forced it deep within him.

He wanted to return to Molinia to continue his training. The excitement almost too much to bear.

——-

He stood next to Robin on a platform overlooking the main plaza which loomed over the front of the barracks. They watched in their finery as the soldiers lined up. It was apparently important that they dress in formal colours to begin the procession. It wasn’t simply to look good. It was the ending of a contract. A ritual display of formality for the Chaos-Shapers. Something they took great pride in. The soldiers were formed in their units, in full dress and displaying their banners. A number of units had already marched off over the course of the morning. Dariea and the others had been due to join with them, but Gryff had been late to return. He had been staying with a house of friends loyal to his clan and they hadn’t seen much of him at all. He hadn’t even noticed their sojourn with Dariea to the cave. Or he hadn’t said anything if he had. He just sat there with a moody expression plastered on his face. He had returned only moments before they were due to set off and was busy ordering attendants to find his belongings.

The Queen of Goshnia and other high ranking officers stood watching, with a decorative unit of their own soldiers. They were dressed in an elegant uniform of toughened leather which had been painted in the colours of their homeland. They stood with their chests puffed out as the people who had helped them secure their it marched off one unit at a time. Disappearing into portals in regimented numbers. Jano wondered if they were even a little concerned at the idea that the full burden would lay on their shoulders now. Or whether it was a relief.

More units marched off with a uniform regularity. It was impressive and terrifying all at once. To the side of the marches, Dariea stood with the last of the command. They made last minute plans and discussed final details. Jano thought to himself that it seemed strange as to Dariea’s involvement in these matters. She was an outsider, a friend to the Chaos-Shapers yes, but still an outsider. Still, she was extremely powerful. An incarnate.

Robin fidgeted around next to him. She was dressed up in her clan’s finery. The clothes were a deep green, with a silver trim and she wore a sigil of their home surrounded by a protective whirlwind. The Relic was still proudly displayed.

“Have you ever heard of an incarnate?” Jano asked her. He wanted to understand what Dariea was. She had just said it was part of an old ranking system for mages. But from what he had heard, it seemed something more. He wanted to know more.

She looked confused. “Yes. Why?” She said.

Jano was a little confused himself. That wasn’t a helpful answer, but it revealed that what he thought was some sort of secret was probably common knowledge. He thought for a second and rephrased his question.

“I heard it mentioned in passing. They seemed to talk about a person as an incarnate, but what does it actually mean?” He asked innocently.

She grinned. “I keep forgetting you know almost nothing. Even if you are learning quite quickly in your training. An incarnate is a person who has complete mastery of essence. Not one type of it, as we do respectively in Molinia - it’s an instinctive grasp of the essence which underlies our world. They can tap into whatever power they wish and use it as though they had been practicing it for years. They are not necessarily masters of everything, but they can be very dangerous.”

She paused and looked towards Dariea. “There are those who think it is but a legend and then there are those who claim to have met them. Some say they are gods. Some believe they bring the dawn of a new age. Others believe they bring the end of the world.”

“And what do you believe?” Jano cut in.

Robin didn’t stop looking towards his teacher. “I have no idea. I’ve never met one, but Zabar of the Chaos-Shapers believes your master is one and she is certainly extremely powerful. But she was still beaten by the Qursan Emperor, correct?”

Jano nodded, with more than a flash of annoyance in his face. “Then I don’t know. There are thousands of legends about extremely powerful individuals: Giants who can swing mountains as clubs, people in the far north who can summon the spirits of another world to fight on their behalf, there’s even talk of a community sect of dragons in the deserts of the west. Personally, I prefer to focus on practical things I can do right now.” She shrugged. “Plus, shouldn’t we have noticed something special? You know, not just that she is powerful and yes she can use multiple kinds of essence and probably a horde of techniques too. That much is obvious to everyone, but something else…”

With a loud blast of a horn the final unit marched off. There were a few stragglers remaining, who would form part of the personal guard for their party’s return trip. One such soldier opened the door behind them to notify them that it was time they began making preparations.

He thought of the voice which haunted him at her words. It was certainly something else. He dismissed the thought. It was just a test. That was all.

He gestured to Robin to lead the way and she gave a faux bow. Jano followed her down the stairs, passed the floor which had formed their temporary home. The smell of the keep was one which he suspected donned every barracks in the land, regardless of nationality. It seemed eerie without the hundreds of soldiers coming to and from its many rooms or dining in its main hall.

They exited the keep to find their Gippies being loaded up by a stable hand. Dariea was no longer talking to any soldiers and was instead tending to her own mount. A soldier pointed him to his steed for the trip and Jano loaded the last of his things. He would have known which animal was his by the pair of scythes sticking out of the back of his belongings. It absolutely refused to be packed due to its weird shape and size.

“Glad to be leaving?” Dariea snuck up on him and he wasn’t able to hide his small shock. She laughed but said nothing.

“You know, I quite like this place. I wouldn’t mind returning one day.” He responded.

“I had a feeling you might like it. It is a shame we weren’t able to stay longer, we could have visited a great back alley restaurant I know.”

“I think we explored quite enough.” Jano said sharply. Then when he realised others may be able to hear, he added, “Well that is, I explored quite a bit with Robin. She showed me quite a few interesting places. We even visited the Paper Palace.”

For a second, Jano could see the pained expression on her face. She adjusted quickly, but he knew what he saw. He quickly scurried for something else to say.

“Why did you think I might like it?” He asked inquisitively.

She paused and then smiled, though it was patently forced. “Well, I thought it was obvious. The Queen has made this land one of beauty and prosperity. People like to live here and the social contract is one of absolute trust.” She paused and looked up at Jano. “It’s almost the exact opposite of what our homeland has become. I just thought you would like it.”

Something clicked for him then. There had been a nagging feeling in the back of his mind the entire time he had been exploring this land. No wonder he thought often about what he might do if he lived in this place.

“Yes. I suppose you are right.” He said.

“I only hope her Majesty manages to hold on to power. Though having met her, I do not doubt she is strong enough. Then when we are done, you will be able to go wherever you wish.” She slapped his Gippie and headed to her own. She turned back toward him and leant down to his ear.

“I mean it Jano, everything is fine. You passed that test fair and square. You are worthy of whatever power it is you have. Do not continue to hide it. We are the master of ourselves, no matter what others might want to think.” Then she smiled, her face adjusting as a thought occurred to her. “That is, other than me and you. You are still my apprentice for the time being.”

She pulled away and quickly jumped up onto her creature, which now rollicked in her presence. Jano looked around to the others, the group was ready. Even Gryff had joined them. The escort were riding their own Gippies, which shouldn’t have seemed as strange to Jano as it did. It was clearly normal to those from Molinia, and perhaps many other places he supposed. Just because they weren’t familiar to him, didn’t mean it was necessarily strange. It was starting to dawn on him just how sheltered he had been as a low ranking member of Qursa. So he resolved to take at face value whatever he faced, good or bad.

There were two soldiers at the front and two at the rear of the party. Jano wasn’t sure why they were necessary, given that they had made it here without such a guard; but nobody else seemed to question it, so neither did he.

The Chaos-Shapers departed Goshnia leaving only a small group behind to continue in an advisory capacity. They left via another route, which skirted around the main city and they quickly found themselves heading out of the orchards. Jano turned for one last glance. He pictured the bustling streets and the tasty food. He pictured the open mansion where the queen would be busy dealing with their departure. He tendered the images into the small pit of regret of his leaving which he felt so keenly. He hoped it would be just as idyllic on his return.