《The Accidental Pimp》Chapter 84: It's Party Time!
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Chapter 84: It’s Party Time!
The problem with being a spy was needing to be where the action would be, even when it would put you in danger. Kelli wasn’t looking forward to tonight, but missing it would’ve pissed off both sets of bosses she had, and at this point she wasn’t sure which of the two pairs was scarier. Sure, Quentin and Razia were softies and tended towards indulging their employees, but Kelli knew damned well that would change if and when her true nature was revealed. Especially after tonight.
She fingered the enchanted ring on her left hand, resisting the urge to twist the stone repeatedly. Kelli did that once without thinking about it and her handler for that week chewed her out. Taking a deep breath, she placed her hands flat on her knees and focused on not moving and just letting the beetle carriage take her further and further away from town. Away from the safety of home and into the unknown, all to play a role and record the fallout.
“Relax,” said Jenna beside her, nudging Kelli with her elbow. “We’ll be fine. It won’t be much different than the party earlier this week. We survived that one, right?”
“Right,” said Kelli through clenched teeth, “but there were just a few of us then. Not…This.” She gestured to the cart they were in, and the three beetle carts ahead of them. “I know we’ll be fine, I’m worried about all the gutter girls ruining things for us.”
One of those gutter girls, Marigold, glared at Kelli. “Worry about yourself, bitch. No way any of us are gonna fuck up this payday. You really think you’re so much better than us just because you work in a big house and -- “
“Nothing like that,” Jenna said, holding up her hands to ward off the rest of the diatribe. “I think Kelli’s just worried because we’ve all been working together for a while now and we know how we work in a group. You’re all just…New to us. Right?”
“Right,” Kelli muttered, looking down. She put a smile on her face. “I’m really bad at talking,” she said, “everything that comes out always makes me sound like an asshole, no matter how hard I try.”
“Mm.” Marigold didn’t look convinced, but she did fall silent again. Kelli was grateful for that. The first half of the beetle ride, everyone was talking a mile a minute and laughing as the novelty of performing out of town consumed them and nervousness hadn’t yet set in.
The extra whores didn’t really come as a surprise, given the size of the party. Just eight people to service a few dozen would’ve been awkward and impractical. It was that bitch Isa who came up with the idea of her and Sam and a few others reaching out to the girls they used to work with to see if people were down for an upcoming job. A well paying one. All of them, the eight originals and the sixteen temporary hires, were receiving a full aquilo for their time.
As far as Kelli could tell, this was Mr. Q’s big debut as a boss to be respected and introduced to everyone else. A way for the former contract killer to interact with the movers and shakers directly instead of just being one of Cicero’s many daggers in the dark. Mere grunts didn’t get to meet with the leaders, and Quentin was no longer a grunt. Maybe by the end of the night he wouldn’t be alive. Kelli hoped so. The sooner she could get out with her money, the better.
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The thought cheered her up some. It was easy to worry, but even easier to just sit back and abandon herself to the night. Whatever happened would happen. For now they were out of Orchrisus proper and headed towards a manor in the wild expanse of the desert. The spring night was beautiful and the night sky was brilliant with countless twinkling stars. Maybe Kelli would die tonight. Maybe Mr. Q or Razia would. Maybe no onedied and the big event she was warned about wouldn’t happen. Either way, she was going to be passed around and used again and still have to keep her ears open for anything she could use against…Anyone on the north side, really.
Nearly an hour from the start of their trip, the manor was visible off in the distance, a lone bastion of light and color shining in the dark. There were other manors around, but none for at least a mile. The city was still considered the best part of Orchrisus to live in when one worked for a living, but the truly wealthy had homes in the safer parts of the hostile great desert. This one was closer than most, but still far enough out to have privacy for the owner of the house, Cicero she guessed, and his staff.
“Look!” Jenna’s outstretched finger whizzed by Kelli’s face. Kelli bit back a sharp retort. “We’re finally almost here. Thank the gods. I’ve been needing to piss for like half the trip.”
“Save it,” Marigold said with a smirk. “Might be someone there who would happily be your toilet.”
That got a groan from almost all the whores while Marigold just cackled. Kelli shook her head. After over a month of working the job maybe she should’ve been more desensitized to the shit they’d say, but some of it still made her want to gag. Worse still was knowing there were people actually into it. Kelli was, in a lot of ways, lucky. She’d gotten a reputation as fairly standard, but it also meant she didn’t have too many weird requests.
As the manor got closer, everyone craned their heads to see around everyone else. A few people muttered stuff under their breath but the general consensus was to be impressed, and even a little fearful. Their whorehouse was something to be proud of, but this…This was like really making the big time. The only thing higher than this would be a schedule of nothing but appointments with wealthy men in their own homes. Kelli would be gone long before she got to that point.
The walls were the same sandy color most desert dwellers used by default. The tops of the walls were a dark color Kelli guessed was red in better lighting, going all the way up to the four towers on the corner of the property. This was less one giant house and more an entire complex. Unlike most of the big buildings in Orchrisus, that was the extent of the paint and general aesthetic. It was a big, beautiful, minimalist building, and Kelli was definitely impressed.
Their carts were ushered in the front gate by guards armed with bolters. One of them caught Kelli’s eye and winked. She looked away from him and back to Jenna, who looked like a kid who was just told she could have whatever candy she wanted. The beetles lumbered in, directed by more staff to the stables, where the big beasts headed drawn by the smell of the garbage they ate. A guard undid the cart’s latch and opened the back up.
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One by one the men and women in the carts were helped down, the cramped space becoming mercifully open in just moments. Kelli followed Jenna and ignored the helping hand, hopping down to the sand below. She stretched hard, continuing until her back popped and her legs screamed with relief. Three dozen of them were there in the courtyard and there was still plenty of room for more. Now that they were there, the sound picked back up, everyone buzzing with conversations overlapping so badly Kelli couldn’t keep them straight, much less capture any individual voice for her own use.
“Alright everyone, listen up!” Razia called out, capturing their attention. By unspoken agreement people gathered around her, forming loose rows of people. Kelli hung out in the back, trying to avoid attention. Once everyone had hushed up, it was (gag) speech time.
“This is the big one. I don’t need to tell you how much is riding on performing well here. All of you have the ability to make or break the entire night for everyone. Even with that in mind, our first priority is to all of you. It’s on all of us to be on our best behavior tonight. Sometimes that means not starting shit, sometimes that means not escalating. If any of you are in danger or hurt, you can count on us to help. Take a good look around at the new faces.”
The men and women gathered there did so, some making goofy faces at one another. A few laughed nervously, but it was otherwise silent as they waited for Razia to continue. “You might know each other, you might not. The important thing is remembering our gladiator friends, who are here to keep us safe. One of them will be near all major areas tonight, and will respond if you call for help.” Who could forget? The Garden now had gladiators hanging out every single night, even when they weren’t working. More than a couple were into her.
“That said, we need to be very careful. We’ll protect you from harm, but these are dangerous people who are used to a certain level of respect and fear from people. For the love of the gods, do not provoke them if you can avoid it. If you fuck it up for everyone, you’ll still get paid.” Everyone relaxed a little after that. “But you won’t be offered more jobs in the future. So, keep it all in mind as you perform tonight. Be safe, be strong, be friendly, and be fun. Any questions?”
Samantha raised her hand, waving it wildly in the air. “What’re the food and drinks situation? I didn’t eat earlier in case someone wants some backdoor action,” that earned her a few laughs and murmurs of agreement, “but if we’re going to be working all night long…”
Razia shook her head, chuckling. “Unlike the other night, I expect things to be more…Drawn out. You’ll probably have a chance to graze throughout the night, and there will definitely be lulls where you can take a break before finding a new lap to sit in. Anyone else?”
An unfamiliar face called out, “And when do we get paid the second half of our fee?”
“When we get back for the night,” Razia said with forced patience. “I’m grateful for each of you that came tonight and didn’t just run off with the shards. Expect to be here for six hours or so, then another hour back. An aquilo for eight hours of your time doesn’t seem so bad, does it?”
That earned her a cheer through the crowd. The gutter girls and guys were the ones most enthused by it. Some of the Garden girls could easily clear that on a good night. Some of them were bad about rubbing it in others’ faces and making everyone else feel bad for -- gods, was Kelli actually getting jealous of Samantha? She shook her head.
“With that out of the way, head on in, look around, don’t go anywhere you’re not supposed to, and make sure you’re ready to perform.” Razia looked around the crowd. The bitch looked excited and even thrilled to be there. She raised her hands and called out, “Party on, bitches!”
The answering cry pierced Kelli’s eardrum. The worst part is she had to join in and pretend to be just as enthused as everyone else. It was getting harder and harder to keep that front up. Everyone poured past Razia, heading into the main building. Kelli was almost one of them, but before she could move past, Razia put her hand on Kelli’s chest. “Not you,” she said. “We need to have a talk.”
Kelli’s blood turned to ice. She nodded, stepping to the side and letting the others move past her. Jenna paused, but Kelli shooed her away, mouthing that she’d catch up. Reluctantly, Jenna left and soon the gladiators followed until it was only Razia, Kelli, and the manor’s guards. It was easy not to panic. Panicking was a rookie mistake. There was no telling what Razia wanted to speak to her about.
“I know who you are,” Razia said. “And I know what you are.”
Well, shit. Kelli swallowed and focused on her breathing. Only rookies panicked only rookies panicked only rookies --
“And what’s that, Razia?” Kelli tried to smile, but it came out as a grimace. That just made the islander whore smile wider.
“Don’t play stupid. You’re not very good at what you do, you know.”
“I’m not?”
“You’re not.” Razia moved past Kelli and circled around her slowly. Kelli wanted to scream. It was such an obnoxious power move. How long had the bitch been waiting to confront her and torment her like this? “You spent the first few weeks you were around asking every question you could. Not very subtle. You befriended half the girls and alienated the other half. You know, instead of either keeping a low profile or trying to be everyone’s friend.”
“Look, you try being a friend to Isa,” Kelli shot back, not caring that her cover was blown. She wondered who would be the one to kill her. Would it be one of their new gladiator guards? Would it be one of Cicero’s men, or would Mr. Q himself kill her? She had trouble picturing him turning on any of his girls, but she wasn’t. “This gig was crap anyway.”
“So you don’t even deny it?” Razia shook her head, tutting. “I’d think you’d want to pretend a little bit longer at least.”
“Is there even a point?” Kelli sighed. “You caught me. Do what you gotta do.” She closed her eyes. Maybe they’d surprise her and kill her faster than she could register it.
“I want to make you a deal,” Razia said.
“What?” Kelli’s eyes shot open.
“I want to make you a deal,” she said louder, continuing to circle Kelli. “See, I don’t care that you’re a spy. It’s annoying, but do you really think I expected any different? There was no way in hell Mr. Cicero was going to let us go without a pair of eyes watching us.”
Oh. OH. Oh gods, this was perfect. This was too perfect. Kelli lowered her head, partially to look ashamed and partially to hide the crack in her facade. She wanted to cry, she needed to laugh. Kelli did neither. “If it helps, I wish it hadn’t been me too,” Kelli admitted. “It wouldn’t have been me, if it wasn’t for my unique ability.”
Razia stopped in front of her. “What unique ability?”
Sighing, Kelli opened her mouth and Razia’s voice came out of it. “What unique ability?” It wasn’t like speaking for real. Most people who heard her didn’t understand that. She opened her mouth and the stored words came out perfectly, better even than she remembered it. When she spoke next it was speaking. It took way more effort to speak than to just let the words out. “I’m a savant. He put me here to spy on the clients, mostly. But also you.”
As much as Kelli disliked the islander, she couldn’t deny Razia was usually cheery and all smiles. There was none of that now, just that look of realization at how much damage she could actually do if she tried. Kelli found herself afraid of the look in Razia’s eyes. Like she wanted to strangle her and scream.
“So that night when Quentin and I were speaking in the bathroom,” said Razia, voice low and dangerous, “what exactly did you hear?”
The best lies were ones hidden within truths. Maybe Kelli didn’t have the temperament to be a proper spy. That didn’t mean she didn’t pick things up along the way, and the number one way to succeed was to only lie when you had to. So she opened her mouth and Quentin’s voice came out. “And whether you like it or not, three days from now I’m leaving for the night and I’m going to murder a child.”
They fell silent there. By now they were starting to attract looks from the guards remaining in the courtyard and up on the walls, but they were too far away to be heard, speaking in hushed tones as they were. “I didn’t hear much more than that. Just that Cicero was going to have Mr. Q kill a child.”
Razia stared at her, covering her mouth with her hand. She took a long, deep breath and let it out. “Okay,” she said. “Okay. Here’s the deal. You go in there, you do what you have to do. Listen in on conversations, fuck anyone who asks, report in after, whatever. But from here on out, know that I’ve got my eye on you and there are some lines you won’t cross. You will stay the fuck away from Quentin no matter what. Do you understand me?”
Kelli was surprised by the vehemence and venom. “Okay, fine, yeah, I can do that,” she said.
Nodding, Razia continued, “You will not get close to Quentin or speak to him unless he speaks to you first. Whatever Cicero wants to know about him, he’s got plenty of other sources. You don’t have to stay away from me, but we both know I’m not going to let anything slip in front of you now. So long as Cicero desires a spy among us, I’ll tolerate you. But if you get any of the others hurt, you will not survive it. Am I clear?”
“Yes,” Kelli said, deflating. “I understand. Look, I don’t want to be here either. Maybe with some luck Mr. Cicero will reassign me. Not like I enjoy laying on back and counting ceiling tiles while some fat fuck uses me.”
“And,” Razia said, smiling. “You will no longer be getting paid to work for us. Cicero’s already paying you, right? No need for you to double dip any longer. Now, get inside and get to work. Embarrass us and I’ll embarrass you in front of Cicero.” Without waiting for a response, Razia turned and walked away.
On the one hand, her cover was almost blown. That wasn’t great, and Christophe and Piro wouldn’t be happy with her slipup, but maybe they’d appreciate her keeping her cool and throwing some of the scent off her. She knew for a fact Razia wouldn’t throw her out so long as she thought she was Cicero’s spy, but not getting paid would…Oh boy, the Warlords wouldn’t like it when she begged for more money. Maybe they’d even be inclined to give it to her, knowing her position was secure.
Kelli looked up into the night sky. The moon hung there half full, like a giant eye watching her. Maybe Piro and Christophe would get what they came for tonight, maybe not. But Kelli, at least, was safe. Sighing, she went inside and to another night of being pawed at.
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