Before Phil could say even a single word, Czar stepped forward and claimed the first turn with a glance toward the rest of his teammates on the sidelines.

“As always, I take the first turn! And you know what, I’ll go ahead and call it now. Five. Turns.” The massively built student confidently blurted out after a single look at his starting hand. Phil raised his eyebrows, the expression itself doing more than words ever could to display the feeling of sheer disbelief that was running through his mind.

“Ha ha, yes yes I know!” Czar bellowed in laughter. “It seems rather impossible, no? But, look at my teammates. Look at their faces. They’ve all see me do this before, and this tournament is nothing but a cakewalk! Well, I suppose you’ll see that I speak the truth soon enough, for I summon the union monster, Heavy Mech Support Platform (500/500) in defense position! Then, I’ll turn up the heat by activating the perfect spell card for the situation. Machine Duplication, would you be a dear and fetch two more mechs from my deck in defense position?”

Where there had once been only a single strange-looking ship, one that looked more like a red and black magnet with wings rather than a proper ship, there were now three in a row, all flying without making a single sound to announce their presence.

“Then, I’ll slap down two face downs and end my turn!”

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

In the chilled air of the observation box, seated just high enough above the arena that the view was impeccable, yet low enough to the ground that each duelist could still be observed with the naked eye, the professors that had been sent by each academy gathered in front of the large viewing window.

“Five turns, huh?” Professor Bernardello muttered with mild curiosity in his voice as he lit up a cigarette. “Would it even be possible for that lad to pull a feat like that off? I could see it done by some pro duelists, but for a student to pull it off outside the classroom…”

Professor Crowler rubbed his chin in thought, ignoring Professor Hibiki’s hand moving at almost lightning-fast speeds to yank the cigarette out of her colleague’s mouth to crush it in her hand.

“The older Truesdale boy, Zane, can do it, perhaps even sooner than five turns. His Cyber Dragons certainly are fast enough. Perhaps this Czar boy has similar cards in his deck?”

“Mamma mia.” Bernardello shook his head in exasperation towards both Crowler’s words and Hibiki’s actions. “Cyber Dragons… now that would be interesting. Pity that the Cyber Dragon school has so few students. Perhaps when the boy graduates, we can have a real match between the two of us.” Then, Bernardello’s broad shoulders slumped and he let out a great sigh. “What a waste, to not have a smoke to accompany a duel.”

Ms. Hibiki firmly glared back at the depressed man. “And again, for the fifth time, you can consider me a mobile ‘no smoking’ zone. That is not a habit that should be displayed where one of the children might see you.”

Caught between the two in what was a continuation of an argument that had been happening off and on since Marco Bernardello had first stepped foot on the island, Crowler visibly wilted, unable to take the side of his student nor his colleague.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Phil stared at the three monsters and the two face down cards Czar had oh so confidently slammed down onto his duel disk.

Huh. Three low level, low attack union monsters. He didn’t equip them to each other, so are they just tribute fodder? Dunno what would need three tributes. The god cards? No, those would fry that guy’s brain like a side of bacon on a grill, and I’m pretty sure they got destroyed or lost with the Millennium Items anyways. Or is he going to protect him with backrow, summon a big monster next turn, and make it bigger with the unions? Eh, suppose I’ll find out next turn. Ain’t no way I can drop those guys with my current hand anyways.

“Welp, you do you big guy. As for me, I’ll take you up on that bet. Five turns, huh? Depending on the luck of the draw, I might not even need that many.”

Czar’s eyes narrowed at the blatant challenge, but ultimately he remained silent.

“Right on, first things first, let’s get hella weird! I activate the continuous spell card, Convulsion of Nature! While this bad boy stays on the field, both of us have to flip our decks upside down, with what used to be the bottom of the deck being the top instead!” Phil cheerfully cried out the activation of one of the strangest cards in the game, smoothly reaching under his deck to flip it upside down while Czar did the same with utter confusion written all over his face. All the while, the arena rumbled as several natural disasters spun to life. Lightning flashed overhead, tornados roared to life, the earth yawned open to swallow the world, and fires raged with utter recklessness.

Then, Phil peeked at the top card of his deck, a card he could now clearly observe the text of due to the upside-down state of his deck. “Yeehaw!” Phil shouted joyously, and he raised his hand in what was nearly a closed fist, with only his pointer finger sticking out. “Looks like right off the bat, I get to show off my beautiful creation. You said five turns, I took you up on that bet, but now I think things might be a little different. Ask yourself this, Czar. Do you feel lucky? Because you better damn hope you do, because I’m about to do this in one turn if you ain’t got no luck at all. From my hand, I activate another continuous spell! Archfiend’s Oath! I choose to apply its effect, paying 500 life points to declare one card name. Then, I excavate the top card of my deck, adding that top card to my hand if it’s the same card I declared.”

Phil made a big show of thinking about his choices, all the while the students in the stands mentally groaned, urging him to just look at the face up card on the top of his deck already. “I know!” Phil drove his fist into his hand, as if he had come to a great epiphany. “It’s a risk, I know, I know. How could I, a mere student, know what the top card of my deck is? Well, I’ll hedge my bets and risk it for the biscuit. The card I declare is Upstart Goblin!”

On the field, standing steady within the endless whirlwind of natural disasters, a brutish, menacing figure with a sword appeared out of thin air, striding towards a stone tablet larger than a grown man. On its surface were countless words made almost indecipherable through age. Step by step the figure came closer to the tablet, completely ignoring the lightning, earthquakes, and tornados to stand directly in front of the giant stone monolith. Then, the figure’s empty right hand reached forward and erupted with a sickly green light which it used to trace out several of the faded words on the tablet, making them easily readable. Phil held his breath with exaggerated mock concern as each letter was outlined, raising his hands and letting out a whoop of joy as two words were revealed: Upstart Goblin.

“Well what do ya know! The face up card on top of my deck is Upstart Goblin! Well, I guess I’ll add it to my hand and immediately activate it, which will let me draw a card and give you 1000 additional life points.”

(Phil: 3500 Czar: 5000)

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Sitting on the bench in the sidelines, Chazz looked on with complete and utter resignation as he watched Phil fool around like a complete moron.

“So, Chazz, do you think he can do it?” Jaden innocently questioned his teammate. “His first turn, wow that would be pretty sick if Phil can pull it off!”

Chazz shrugged. He was already mostly mentally checked out at this point. “Probably.” He sighed. “I don’t even know what I was expecting with how Phil was laughing about his ‘super secret deck’. He isn’t even taking this seriously!”

Jaden laughed in response. “Oh come on, isn’t variety the spice of life? There’ll be all sorts of sweet decks and strategies in this tournament anyways, I’m sure you’ll get your time to shine!”

“It’s not that.” Chazz frowned. “We’re representatives of our school! Of our dorms! But Phil’s out there acting like a clown and not even bothering to fight his opponent with his best!” Chazz sighed once more and shook his head in irritation. “Whatever. I should have expected this, the whole situation is on me for not winning back on the island.”

“Ah, you’ll get him next time, for sure!” Jaden sympathetically patted Chazz on the shoulders while adding a few final words that made the prideful Obelisk Blue sit up straight with a glare directed at Jaden. “But, before you get a rematch with him, we still have to go another round, and I’ll beat you this time!”

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Meanwhile, Phil was still on quite a roll and was taking much delight at seeing that his opponent still hadn’t figured out what he was trying to do.

“Now that I’ve drawn a card from Upstart Goblin, I activate another spell card. Enchanting Fitting Room! By paying 800 life points, I get to excavate the top four cards of my deck and special summon any and all level three or lower normal monsters that I find in those four cards.”

Phil whistled with delight as a pulsing mass of tubes surrounding a platform shrouded in a deep red cloth sprang to life on the field. The tubes hissed and groaned as a shadowy figure, thankfully obscured for the most part by the red curtain, tossed several articles of clothing over the curtain while complaining that the fit was all wrong. A pair of bell bottom jeans and a t-shirt with a picture of a crumpled beer bottle displayed on it were all unceremoniously thrown away onto the field while the shadowy figure made their decision. For a moment, the two articles of clothing laid there limply, until one by one they began to move, twisting and turning their fabric two mimic two monsters.

“Well well well, look who we have here,” Phil chuckled. “Enchanted Fitting Room found two monsters, just for me. Say hello to the Giant Soldier of Stone (1300/2000) and Oppressed People (400/2000), summoned nearly for free in defense position!”

Indeed, the two articles of clothing had formed into the stoney monster that was still quite popular due to Yugi Muto’s usage of it, and the much lesser known hologram of a red-clothed soldier beating the absolute stuffing out of a poor farmer.

“Pretty cool, right?” Phil questioned the silent Czar before continuing. “But, I’m sorry to say that they won’t be sticking around for long. It’s almost like a Pot of Greed, but not quite as good! I activate from my hand another spell card, White Elephant’s Gift! Since I control a normal monster, I can send one of them to the graveyard to draw two cards. Giant Soldier of Stone, I hardly knew ye.”

Almost as quickly as it had been summoned, the Giant Soldier of Stone crumbled to the ground with a small groan of pain as a floating bone appeared out of nowhere and wacked the monster upside the head once, twice, and a third time for good measure.

“Thanks for the draw two buddy. Anyways, I activate the second Archfiend’s Oath I just drew, because for some reason this damn card doesn’t have a hard once per turn restriction. Right away, I think I’ll risk it for the biscuit again and guess a card. Archfiend’s Oath, would you be a dear and take 500 of my life points to add that juicy third copy of Archfiend’s Oath sitting right on top of my deck?”

(Phil: 2200 Czar: 5000)

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

“What is that boy searching for?”

Ms. Hibiki jumped, looking around as an unfamiliar voice came out of nowhere from where she stood with Crowler and Bernardello. Behind her, a man with pointy black hair and a serious look stared at her with crossed arms.

“Ah, right. Thelonious Viper. I’m one of the accompanying teachers from West Academy.” The man introduced himself, shaking hands one by one with Ms. Hibiki and Crowler and completely ignoring Bernardello.

Ms. Hibiki shook her hand to try and disperse the pain while moving back to Viper’s question. “I suppose you mean to ask what card he’s trying to find in his deck?”

Viper nodded without a word, motioning her to continue.

“Honestly… I couldn’t say for sure.” Ms. Hibiki took on a thoughtful expression, turning to Crowler and Bernardello to get their opinions on the matter. “Perhaps a way to destroy Czar’s traps?”

Crowler nodded in agreement. “He certainly has enough cards in his hand to summon a strong monster, though it would have to be something on par with my Ancient Gear Golem to have a chance at ending this in one turn.”

“The kid might’ve just gotten a bit cocky.” Bernardello interjected. “A one turn kill is something you only rarely see in pro duels. Possible, but difficult to pull off.”

Viper gave Bernardello a side-eye. “Ah yes. The Italian Stallion. How quickly I forget that you think you can teach now.” With each word he uttered, an invisible but heavy presence seemed to build up in the air between the two men as they both straightened up and looked each other square in the eyes.

Suddenly, Bernardello let out a grim smile, reaching into his pocket for his packet of cigarettes and lighting one up with a fluid, almost unconscious movement. “Three. Zero.”

Those two words felt like they sent a electric crackle of energy slamming through the air, Viper’s fists creaking as he tightened them with such force that his knuckles visibly whitened.

And then, all tension in the air dissipated as fast as it had gathered as Ms. Hibiki yanked the burning cigarette out of Bernardello’s mouth and stabbed it into a nearby ashtray.

“Sixth. Time.” She growled, causing both Bernardello and Viper to step back in alarm. “I know there are no children up here in the viewing box. But you do not know when that could change. You do. Not. Smoke. At. All. Not when they have even the barest of a chance of seeing you. You are supposed to be a role model that these kids look up to. A role model! Act like one, or heaven help me, Chancellor Sheppard and hell, not even Seto Kaiba himself will be able to save you.” Every single word of her lecture caused Bernardello to visibly wilt, and even the uninvolved bystanders were not able to escape unharmed by the sheer anger in her voice. Yet, not even a single professor that was in the viewing box said a word, wisely turning away to spectate the rather strange duel that was happening down below.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

“Now normally, I would shout something like third Archfiend’s Oath! Lets gooooo! However, the funny thing is that I don’t need it! Instead, I’m gonna go for the mulligan” Phil shouted out gleefully. “Card Destruction, get rid of my hand and get me a new one!”

“Now, we all know what this means, of course. Now that I have a new hand, you bet your butt that I got more than a few extra draw cards with it. I activate Graceful Charity. Pretty lady, would you mind giving me three cards and discarding two cards? Thanks mate, you’re a real gem.”

Phil whistled a simple tune as a gentle, angelic lady added the top three cards of Phil’s deck to his hand, accepting two cards back and softly setting them in the graveyard with an expression full of pure mercy and compassion.

“Perfect draw if I do say so myself. Well, it coulda been better but these cards should do the job. Czar, ol’ buddy ol’ pal, you’ve already seen my three Archfiend’s Oaths. Now, I activate my second Enchanting Fitting Room! Pay eight, feel great, and damn do I feel great right now!”

Alongside the farmer that still suffered constant torments, yet another Giant Soldier of Stone formed out of fabric, this time rippling to life out of a pair of ratty old boxers. Yet, before the rocky defender even had a chance to wave hi to its oppressed companion that was screaming in sheer agony from the beating, Phil cycled through an additional Upstart Goblin and a second copy of White Elephant’s Gift, drawing a total of three more cards after giving Czar 1000 more life points and crushing the Giant Soldier of Stone into a heap of rubble.

“Crap.” Phil muttered upon realizing his mistake. “Sorry, my stoned friend, I didn’t notice you were going to wave at the dude getting beaten to death.” Then, he shrugged helplessly towards Czar, who by this point was resting by squatting on the ground with his hands on his knees and his feet flat on the ground to keep him balanced. “Eh, I can remedy that real quick. I activate my third White Elephant’s Gift, sending Oppressed People to the graveyard to draw two more cards. Of course, by now these continuous spell cards I have laying around are clogging my field up a bit, so they gotta go. Mystical Space Typhoon, please atone for the fact that my deck didn’t bless me with a Heavy Storm in time. Go ahead and destroy one of those useless Archfiend’s Oaths. Next up, I activate the equip spell I spent an annoying amount of time digging for, Premature Burial! Well, I suppose it was either that or finding a third Enchanting Fitting Room, really anything that lets me pay eight to feel great again! Premature Burial, resurrect my Giant Soldier of Stone to the field in attack position! Of course, the position doesn’t matter at all, because now I can unveil my ultimate combo. Yes, it’s the moment you’ve been waiting for. I place one card face down and I activate my spell card, Reversal Quiz!”

Phil adjusted an imaginary set of glasses to try and look smart while an absolutely ridiculous-looking man wearing a striped hat, white gloves that reached up to his elbows, and a blue shirt with extremely poofy shoulders appeared sitting behind a teal box with a pondering look on his face.

“Okay, Czar, this is how it works. So, I send every card in my hand and on my side of the field to the graveyard, and then I guess what type of card is on the top of my deck, that being spell, trap, or monster. If I get it right, we swap life points.

Czar’s face paled and he lurched to his feet, his eyes noting one thing, and one thing only. The life point counter, which showed Phil at a measly 600 life points, and Czar at an insane 6000, which was quite a difference.

“B-but… you’ll still have nothing left to attack me with!” Czar protested as Phil sent his entire hand, the remaining Archfiend’s Oath, the Convulsion of Nature, the Premature Burial, and the Giant Soldier of Stone to the graveyard while the man in the striped hat maliciously chuckled to himself.

“Fair point.” Phil nodded in agreement. “But I don’t need to attack you. Hell, I don’t have a monster in this deck with higher attack than 1300, and in all honesty almost all of my monsters are in the graveyard now anyways. But you know, that doesn’t matter.”

Phil let a wild, exhilarated grin spread across his face as a shot of pure adrenaline pumped through his blood.

“Crazy, right? What do I call. Convulsion is gone because of Reversal Quiz, so I can’t cheat at this question. What do I call indeed. It could be anything, you know. It could be anything.” Phil nodded to himself, and then he chuckled.

“I choose spell card, because that’s the majority of what my deck is.”

The man in the idiotic-looking blue shirt slapped his hand down on a button as Phil revealed the top card of his deck, showing off the spell card Sparks as a deafening bell sounded and their life points were swapped.

The blood drained from Czar’s face, and he gulped as he saw the results. But, as Czar mentally reminded himself, he was still alive.

“So much for one tur-“ Czar began to say with a shaky smile, until Phil pointed towards him and made a shushing sound.

“Ah. Sorry. One more thing. See, now that Reversal Quiz has resolved, the face down that was sent to the graveyard by its effect comes into play. I activate the effect of Fuhma Shuriken! When it gets sent from the field to the graveyard, it deals 700 damage to my opponent!”

(Phil: 6000 Czar: 0)

The students in the stands had long since fallen silent as they stared at the boy in the middle of the arena, wearing a mustard yellow jacket and holding out his arms with a dopey, proud grin. His opponent could do nothing but gape at the Ra Yellow, his former braggart attitude blown away like dust in the wind. Yes, there was only one, single sentence running through the minds of the spectating students.

A o-one turn kill.

Well, only through the spectating students not from the main duel academy. Chazz, on the other hand, simply looked at Phil with pure, undiluted disgust ignoring how Jaden shook from excitement while the Slifer Red tried to think of how he would counter Phil’s strategy if it was ever used against him.