- Shari -

Okay, I feel slightly displaced at the moment.

Not only because I'm contemplating if it's more unlikely for someone being born a commoner, without any relations or noteworthy accomplishments, or for a slime to linger in the royal chambers, being toe to toe with the queen.

That I'm profoundly unsure if she truly thinks we were fitting caretakers for the next in line for the throne isn't helping.

If she would just finally recognize my presence.

"Ahem, while these are very particular circumstances, I am not completely sure if we should be the only ones present... here... with your majesty." (Shari)

At least, I'm sure the protocol for such an audience is by now dissolved into slime.

"Well, I think I understand enough about the situation. If you would have any intention of eating me the guards wouldn't have been able to stop you before. And while I'm sure that you'd be able to use your unique condition in very creative ways I doubt you intend to ravage me." (queen)

Leave my core, imaginary pictures.

Please leave my core and never return.

"What does 'ravage' mean, mom?" (Anvenia)

And this is why you should mind what you're saying in front of children.

"Anvenia, dear, I sadly don't have the time for a long-winded explanation. In short, it involves jumping at someone else and forcing one's will on their body." (queen)

"Oh, like Liqu did when she took me!" (Anvenia)

And this is why children shouldn't even be present during such a talk.

Now she looks first at Liqu and then back at Anvenia.

"She... took you?" (queen)

"Yes! She just jumped over me and a moment later I was deep inside her. It was strange to be this close and I got totally wet. At first, I was confused and afraid, but soon after this, it was really fun! And just now we went for a second round!" (Anvenia)

Please stop talking.

Please stop talking.

Please stop talking.

"I, I, I, I promise neither I nor Liqu did anything questionable to her. We are only talking about transportation." (Shari)

"I'm pretty sure what you did was extremely questionable, though I doubt it will help to pursue this any further. Now excuse me, but I won't receive my husband in a nightgown." (queen)

Why is she getting naked in front of me!?

Just because I'm a slime doesn't mean I don't feel embarrassed.

I put my hands in front of my eyes.

Shit!

Translucent blue isn't covering a thing!

All I'm getting out of this is the queen's stripping in a special color shade.

"I'm curious. Please tell, how was Count Kahan able to tame you, or whatever he did to draw you to his side?" (queen)

Tame?!

Am I a pet?

"Ahem, I might be what I am, but I'm very reasonable. We made the count an offer about becoming his employees and in return he assured us that we wouldn't have to worry anymore about getting hunted down or attacked by anyone who gains sight of us. Which kinda was a problem when we tried to enter the city." (Shari)

"I can imagine." (queen)

I have certainly no experience with talking to royalty.

There's this constant pressure that I might terribly mess up.

"I'm bored. What happens now?!" (Liqu)

Or maybe that slime does.

My mental state doesn't get any better when the queen's gaze now settles on Liqu.

Oh my god, this can't end well.

While she's fastening a glistening red gown around her body she addresses Liqu.

"The other one already told me her name. And who are you?" (queen)

"I'm Liqu! Nice to meet ya!" (Liqu)

Very gently I press Liqu's extended hand back down.

Partially I blame myself for not introducing her to palace manners beforehand.

On the other side, it's not a topic I'm knowledgeable about, and considering Liqu I'm still stuck at the basics so the advanced stuff should be kept for later.

"She's really nice and played with me." (Anvenia)

"I see that you were very close." (queen)

While saying that she assesses her slime-soaked form and takes a brush.

"Would you now please come to me, Avenia?" (queen)

The girl in question grows stiff at those far too calmly said words and shaking moves towards her mother.

She sits down on the bed, places a blanket on her lap, and gestures for Anvenia to take a seat.

"M-mum, I know I disregarded how I'd be perceived from the outside and am sorry. Iekh!" (Anvenia)

With a strong pull, the brush goes through the princess' wavy hair.

"Not as bad as I thought, but your hair is severely tangled up." (queen)

Overall she seems fine, but the way the brush is used on her makes it appear more like an educational measure.

However, before I can do something Liqu dashed directly in front of the two.

"Hey, she doesn't like this!" (Liqu)

And now it's my turn.

Slime dash!

I dash behind Liqu and plunge my hand inside.

"Stop it now!" (Shari)

"But I'm supposed to protect her." (Liqu)

"I refuse to die because you had to berate the queen about her parenting!" (Shari)

"I see that there's a peculiar dynamic between you two." (queen)

Oh please, you have no idea.

Anvenia looks still very uncomfortable but now that the worst knots loosened it slowly gets better.

"Ahem, I can assure you that while she's a very difficult character she was very sophisticated in her task to protect her highness." (Shari)

"So you say." (queen)

"We're basically a team. Her job is to annihilate everything that shows up while mine is to prevent that she goes overboard with this." (Shari)

"I suppose that makes sense. If you would now please relay to me what happened. You seem aware enough to know that I have questions." (queen)

"Yes, sure." (Shari)

And so I'm having to relay everything that led to this situation.

How we took that employment, Liqu engaged with Anvenia, and got appointed as her personal guard while I was busy with leading tasks.

She naturally squints her eyes at this decision of the count.

I continue with how we became aware of this conspiracy and that it ended with that big attack on us.

During my recollection, I become more and more sure that the world simply plotted against me that those individually seen unremarkable events ended in such ridiculousness for me.

By the time we're finished Anvenia's hair got untangled and while her clothes are still slimed her face got cleaner.

"This much should suffice." (queen)

Suffice? Suffice for what?

"I'm not sure if you are aware, but his majesty is quite fond of his daughter, so she had to be at least somewhat presentable. Though, I don't plan to downplay the situation." (queen)

This was for us!

It makes it easier to present Anvenia to her father without him calling the guards on us.

"While we're at it, would it be possible for me to get anything to cover myself? Any spare clothes?" (Shari)

"I didn't know this was a thing for your kind. However, you are aware that you basically asked me to share my wardrobe?" (queen)

Why does this meeting have to go wrong in every way possible?

She seems to notice how I'm deflating, which isn't surprising since a liquid body tends to apply this kind of figure of speech very literally.

"Fine, I'll take a look. I suppose that size doesn't matter to you." (queen)

Actually, it does, as my current shape is what I'm used to, and being stuck with minor alterations makes me uncomfortable in the long run.

Though, mentioning this won't end well for me.

And after all those slip-ups, it seems like I finally got lucky and she finds a still formal, yet not so stiff dress I can wear to endure the stares I'm about to receive.

"What is the meaning of this?!" (King)

And not a single moment too late.