sent there by him

now seems so long ago, another world

some months, in fact, feels longer though

he does not go there anymore, that's done

so it's okay, allowed —

can still go there myself, alone

on Wednesday nights

no vow is broken, no real risk

no danger of renewing shame

or pain — well, some

but face it, bitch! that danger's always — everywhere

this is a dancing place

-music from musicians close enough to touch

-wooden dance floor smoothly strongly underfoot

-dancers! strangers who get lifted sometimes by the song

reach out to me

embrace me as a tune comes to its end

thank me! what? for what?

my liveliness —

of course they do not know

my deathliness, how could they?

since when does death go dancing?

since always? since never? since today, tonight

another night among the redchecked tablecloths

the soft electric candlelight

wineglasses shining in that magic flicker glow

murmur voices all around

nightly call for timely tips to pay the lovely band . . .

although the place did come to me from him

he's left it now, just as he's spurned me

so we fit well together, me and this old place

like some long married couple

who only do it once a week.