"okay i've missed you guys so much." natalie confesses. "i've missed you guys too." i smile. "me three." riley holds her hand out on the table. nat and i both put our hands on rileys. "we have to go back to our routines. i don't remember the last time we went to the mall together." riley frowns. i remember when we would always hang out before school. i missed those days. i miss when we were closer. well closer to riley.

"this weekend we can go." i say smiling. this wasn't a fake smile, i was genuinely happy. i think. "okay so i wanted to invite you guys to hang out at mines today with parker." riley says after taking a sip of her iced coffee. well...so much for being happy. "with parker?" i try my best to not look upset. i can feel natalies eyes on me. "yeah. i wanted you guys to get a chance to know each other."

oh i know parker.

"yeah, that's cool." natalie smiles. i'm quiet. "bri? is that cool?" riley looks at me hopefully. yeah bri, is that cool? my brain is literally attacking me. "definitely." my real smile is gone and is replaced with a fake one.

❀

i take a deep breath as i walk with my friends into the school. i know i'm going to have to face him sooner or later. it's going to be here at school or later at rileys. i'd prefer never.

he's waiting at rileys locker. she skips over to him and they kiss. i look away not expecting them to do that. not going to lie, that hurt. "i don't know what to say other than sorry." natalie puts her hand on my shoulder. "it's weird to watch."

watching the guy i like kiss my best friend felt so shitty. when natalie and i meet up with them they stop kissing. i look at him and we make eye contact immediately. he smiles a little and waves. i look away. "so parker, i was just telling the girls that i wanted us to hang at my house after school so they can get to know you better." riley holds onto him.

she's smiling. glowing even. i see the way she looks at him, it's just like how i looked at him. i should be happy for her but why do i feel so bad? i hate this feeling.

"that sounds cool. what time?" parker asks looking down at her, smiling. "i'd say... maybe three thirty? so we can have time to freshen up?" riley looks at all of us. we all nod. "sounds like a plan." she smiles and lays her head on his shoulder. the bell rings. "catch you guys at lunch." riley kisses parker goodbye then waves at us. "bye. love you." nat waves leaving parker and i alone.

i tuck my hair behind my ear and turn to walk to class, trying to avoid a potentially awkward conversation. "hey bri, can we talk?" parkers voice makes me stop. i squeeze my eyes shut not wanting to but i turn around anyways. i fix my glasses. "about what?" i try to sound the opposite of what i'm feeling. "us. riley." he messes with his hair.

us. "what about us? there is no us." i adjust my bag. he sighs. "i just wanted to start over. i feel so bad about how everything went down. i never wanted to make you upset." i look at the floor. it's too early to be this emotional. every time i'm with him now i get reminded of our last talk.

"how everything went down?" i raise a brow. are you kidding me?

"parker i found out that you're talking to my best friend from my best friend! you didn't even have the decency to tell me yourself after you were about to fuck me in my room the night before." i whisper the last part.

"bri i'm sorry, it's not like that! i just want to start over?" i scoff. is he serious? "you want to start over?" i cross my arms. "yes i do, for rileys sake and for ours. i want to be friends again." that word slaps me in the face. friends. "fine, whatever parker." i nod definitely not fine. "okay so we're cool?" he smiles. "yeah we're cool." i roll my eyes and walk into class. i can't believe i have to sit with him for a whole period.

❀

"we should start working on our anatomy project soon." parker walks out of first period with me. "yeah we should. let's come up with ideas and share them later at rileys?" i suggest. my attitude has slightly gone away. not all of it though. "sounds good. i'll catch you later." he touches my shoulder before leaving.

parker truly wanted to start over. he was being friendly the whole period as if nothing happened. i tried so hard to match his energy but all i could think of was how things were before. before riley. i break out of my thoughts and i see mason walking in the hall. "hey mason!" i walk up to him.

he looks around. "hey bri." he smiles. not going to lie, i miss being with him. fuck parker. "hey." i look at him. he looks so good. "sorry if i scared you last night. i was really frustrated." i laugh it off. "if anything your brother was the scary one, not you." he says and i scoff. "whatever." mason laughs. "seriously, i thought he was going to kill me."

"mason don't be scared of my brother. he looks and acts intimidating but he's really not. he's just overprotective of me." i explain. "as every brother should be."

"i guess. seriously though, we talked last night and he's canceling all the rules.. or something like that." i say and he nods. "cool." what's up with the word 'cool' today? i grab his hand and i hold it. "i had a lot of fun yesterday." i look at our hands. "i did too. i'll make sure to keep planning random trips." mason makes me smile. "please do."

i look up at him into his eyes then his lips. would it be a crime to kiss him right now? fuck it. i kiss him gently and his smile breaks it. "what?" i smile from his reaction. "you're going to get me in so much trouble."

❀

mason reminds me that soccer tryouts are today and i make a mental note to remember. "i am so excited for after school." riley squeals at the lunch table. nat and i just smile. "i can't wait until you guys get to know him. he's really cool." i know.

i haven't seen riley this happy in a while. "are you talking about me?" parkers voice comes out of nowhere and he appears in front of me. he sits next to riley, puts his arm around her and they kiss.

for a second i feel weird again but i quickly make myself forget about it. i can't help but think what the fuck. i want riley to be happy, she's my best friend. i needed to get over everything that happened and be supportive. i guess she won this one.

"so since we're getting to know each other later, let's have a quick round of questions." i smile deviously. "hit me." parker smirks at me accepting my challenge. i ask him every question i asked him on our ice cream date and he gave me the exact same answers. this was kind of becoming a game for me. i thought it was pretty funny.

"what about you nat? what's your favorite color, movie, drink, sport? i want to know." parker looks at nat and i answer all of them in my head. light blue, sixteen candles, raspberry iced tea and volleyball. "you will find that out later."

after lunch natalie pulled me aside after riley and parker left. "did something happen between you and parker? you both have some interesting energy right now." she asks. "i called him out, he wanted to start over and i wanted to be supportive." i just smile. "that's really cool of you bri but what about you? are you okay with that?" she gets all mushy with me. "absolutely not but what are best friends for?"