《Eve's Guide to Ghost Removal》Chapter 26: Magical Caffeine
Advertisement
WaffleHenge was nearly empty now in the time between breakfast and lunch. The only other diners were three old men who were all reading their own copies of the Blackwood Review and not talking to each other. Donna swept the scuffed linoleum floor near the counter. And Ezra chewed on the last of his toast as he glanced around, thinking. His gaze stopped on the old men, and he stopped chewing.
“Oh no,” he said, glancing down at where a watch normally sat on his bony wrist. “What time is it?”
Eve checked her phone. “9:24.”
Ezra stood up so quickly he rattled the table. “I’m late for work,” he said, worrying his hands. “Can I pay you back for breakfast later? I don’t have my wallet.”
Eve nodded. “Sure. Do you need a ride?”
Ezra shook his head, bouncing on his feet and looking at the door. “No, I’ll run. It’ll be quicker.”
Jon watched him with a little crease between his eyebrows. Eve shrugged and waved as Ezra took long steps to the door.
As soon as the door closed with a jingle behind Ezra, Jon leaned across the table and caught Eve’s eye. “We need to find out how Chelsea died.”
“Duh.” Eve shook her head. “I mean, I don’t think it was actually Ezra. But he’s not going to stop thinking about it until we can prove it.”
“Right,” Jon said. He nodded and leaned back.
“We need to talk about this somewhere else,” Eve said.
Jon’s back straightened, his face brightening like the embodiment of a light bulb moment. “Can we go to your apartment? I have an idea.”
***
Eve’s apartment was still torn apart from Chelsea’s tantrum the night before. Eve had scooted things out of her immediate way, but left everything else where it was. So when Jon stepped through the door behind her, he gave a long whistle.
“Damn,” he said. “I wonder why last night was so bad.” He headed straight for the desk, stepping over the mess. “I have a theory about your magical abilities,” he added.
Eve made a face. “Bleh.” She started gathering up the many papers scattered on the floor. “What is it?” She yawned. How much coffee had she had at WaffleHenge? She couldn’t remember, but she still felt exhausted, limbs heavy and brain sluggish.
“You wrote down the spell that bound Chelsea to you, right?”
The ghostly presence hovering apologetically over Eve intensified briefly at the mention of her name. Eve’s shoulders crept up toward her ears, and she nodded. “I transcribed the henge runes that apparently were a spell.”
“So,” Jon continued, “maybe what you need to cast a spell is to write it down.”
“But last night I didn’t write anything down,” she said. “I said it. It’s all bullshit.”
Advertisement
Jon thought for a moment, scratching his jaw. “And you told Kyle to leave the other day, too.” He shrugged. “We can try it, at least. You don’t know it won’t work.”
Eve pursed her lips. “Whatever,” she said. Jon correctly interpreted it as grudging acceptance of his idea. He perked up and herded Eve over to her desk.
“Write a spell for us, then,” he said. He took the stack of papers from her arms and gathered more from the floor. He left them in a pile on Eve’s desk and picked up a handful of pens.
“To do what?” Eve said, voice flat. “I can’t magically produce the medical examiner’s report to show Ezra Chelsea’s wounds weren’t wolf bites.”
Jon gasped, looking up at her. “Maybe not, but you can magically help me break into the police station.” Eve stared at him. Jon’s smile was as easy as ever, not even a sliver of doubt on his face.
“Okay, fine.” Eve opened a drawer and sifted through her various fancy papers. “But I’m not coming in after you if something goes wrong.” She was tired. She didn’t want to think anymore, or argue, or protest that she was not a witch. If Jon wanted to do some stupid shit, she wasn’t going to stop him, especially if it was going to help get rid of Chelsea.
“It’ll be easy,” he said, blithe as ever. “Even if I did get caught, I’m sure I could talk my way out of it.” He beamed, and Eve blinked at the brightness. She wondered again how much of his perky himbo persona was a facade.
Eve pulled out a thick, creamy piece of paper and her blue glass pen. She looked at Jon while she thought, and grabbed the sparkly green ink. What kind of “spell” was she supposed to “cast,” anyway? What would make it easier for him to get into the police station and come back out with the medical examiner’s report?
In long, straight strokes, she wrote, “I SHOULD BE HERE.” It was business-like, serious—aside from the ink color. She went back over it to thicken the lines. Then she let it dry for a moment and held it up for Jon to see.
He laughed, delighted. “That’ll work.”
“Yeah, it will,” Eve said as she folded the paper into a small, thick square and handed it to him. “I don’t want to find another ghost hunter, so you’re not allowed to get arrested.”
He laughed again and saluted her. “Yes, ma’am.“ He pushed the note into his pocket and patted it once.
“And Ezra will be sad if you get arrested,” Eve continued.
Jon hesitated. “You think so?” he asked. Eve rolled her eyes and nodded. He swallowed and then smiled again. “Good thing I’ve got Sunflower the witch to keep me out of jail.”
Advertisement
“Give me the paper back,” Eve said, her face blank. “I need to change something.”
“Nooooo,” Jon said, bouncing out of reach. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” He laughed as Eve reached toward him with one hand and punched him lightly in the arm with the other.
She laughed, a huff of breath out her nose, and shook her head. “Shut up. You’re supposed to be stealing from the cops, not being dumb.”
***
The Blackwood Police Station was a squat, square building, glaringly bright beige in the late-morning sunlight. Eve squinted at it from inside her car. A lake breeze slithered in through the open window and she shivered. She tugged at her short sleeves and leaned into the sunlight. The heat of it made her realize she’d been cold since she’d woken up. She felt like a lizard—a warm, sunlit rock to lay on would’ve been incredible right then.
Jon had walked into the station half an hour before, Eve’s “magical” note in his pocket, and Eve was now considering how long she should wait before counting him as lost. She’d said she wasn’t going to rescue him, but even if she’d wanted to, she didn’t know if she could. She’d been exhausted when she’d gotten home the night before, exhausted when she’d woken up with Harvey’s fur in her mouth, exhausted at breakfast, and she was somehow even more tired now. She turned and reached into the back seat for an energy drink and chugged it.
Eve waited for the rush of caffeine to push back the advance of the fatigue and rubbed her face. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes against the warm brightness.
And then the car door closed and Eve jumped. Jon sat in the passenger seat and looked at her.
He frowned and leaned in. “Are you okay, Eve?”
She blinked and took a deep breath. She contemplated lying. “Was I asleep?”
“Chelsea is taking too much from you,” Jon said. He took a file folder out from inside his leather jacket and stuck it between the seat and the center console. Eve’s eyes slowly sank closed, and when she opened them again, Jon was opening her door. “Here, let me drive,” he said, herding her to the passenger side.
Eve opened her eyes again as Jon parked at the North Henge and once again herded her where he wanted her, which was through one of the trilithons.
Eve sucked in a sharp breath and staggered against the nearest stone. The tingling, rushing energy of the ley line sparked up from her feet and the hand on the stone, and for the first time since the night before, she was warm. It was like the sun had finally emerged from behind the clouds, and Eve basked in it for a moment. The long grass around the stones waved gently in the wind.
“As if I wasn’t already pissed enough,” she muttered, “now I have to get magical caffeine to function.”
Jon had a serious, thoughtful set to his mouth. “I think last night’s spell took more out of you than you realized. And then you told Chelsea to speak, which was probably a huge amount of energy.” His brow creased and he frowned. “And I asked you to make me a spell as if it was easy. I’m sorry.”
Eve waved the apology away from her like a swarm of gnats. “It’s whatever. The sooner she’s gone, the sooner I can be done with all of this bullshit.”
“Speaking of,” Jon said, pulling the mysterious folder out of his jacket again and setting it on one of the fallen stones like a table. “The medical examiner’s report.”
“You got it,” Eve said. She sat cross-legged in the warm grass. Her brain felt like it was working at double speed after acting like a geriatric snail all morning.
“It was in a recycling bin,” Jon said, sitting next to her.
Eve flipped through the stapled papers, skimming for something interesting. “But this is important evidence in the case.”
“Wouldn’t be the first corrupt police force.” Jon shrugged. Eve frowned. Detective Ishida, at least, hadn’t seemed dirty. She’d seemed sincere, and sad, about Chelsea.
Eve stopped on a page and read more closely. Jon craned his neck to see, too. “The bites were post-mortem,” she said quietly, aware of the dog walkers and parents with toddlers in the vicinity. “And the bite-mark pattern doesn’t match any known patterns, animal or human.”
“Ezra’s teeth looked pretty wolf-like to me,” Jon said. “Right? So if it was him, that would show up as a wolf bite.”
Eve nodded. “But if it’s not human, what was it?” She read further. “They found DNA in the wounds, but it couldn’t be conclusively identified.” she paused and set the report down on the soft grass. “What the fuck is Kyle?”
“A demon or a fairy,” Jon said. “We covered this already.”
Eve gagged. “Neither of those are real,” she said, with less confidence than she would normally have in a statement so unequivocally correct. Jon gave her a look. “Fucking hell,” she said. “They’re not, right?”
“You saw a werewolf last night,” Jon said.
“That doesn’t mean every fucking monster and supernatural thing exists!” Eve crossed her arms. “Ugh. You know the worst part about all of this? It means my parents are right.”
Jon laughed and leaned back against a stone. “How terrible,” he said.
Advertisement
- In Serial9 Chapters
Twins of Black and White (Pokemon Fanfic)
You know the drill. Truck-Kun decided that another person needed to die. This lucky, or unlucky person depending on how you look at it, was sent to the world of pokemon. They were born on the same day and in the same village as the future champion of the Sinnoh region. Unfortunately, they have no memories of this until they catch their first pokemon. This means that the MC gets to be childhood friends with the (in my opinion) most powerful of all the pokemon champions. This is a story about two friends having a journey to take on the Pokemon League together as they adventure and catch pokemon in this magical world.
8 123 - In Serial63 Chapters
Mage of the Abyss
Truth often lies behind the mask people called smiles. Siola Mithra, the youngest child of the Mithra household and the first that was known… as a disgrace. Neglected by her family, abandoned by the one she loves. The girl swore to have revenge on every single one of them, making those who have hurt her to this extend, regret everything they have done. However, the plan she has crafted for so long failed miserably, and long after she was under the heavy depression of her own mistake, she gave up thinking about it all and move on with her life. Picking up the most popular Virtual-Reality game that she always avoided and soon, she finds a new companion, new life, a new purpose. She embraced it all dearly. Living a stable generic life… until a certain event happens.
8 142 - In Serial50 Chapters
Glory be to Arria
Michael De Arria has recently been crowned as the emperor to the Divine Empire of Arria. Upon being crowned he quickly has to face the looming threat of a two sided war. The Allonian Empire has backed the Kingdom of Aveven in their war to defend their territory while the Yanzhou Dynasty watches with greedy eyes waiting for the perfect time to strike. Not only does Michael have to worry about outside threats but he must quell inner threats as well. Giovanni, Chancellor and previous regent of Arria, has accumulated large amounts of wealth and influence in the east during the regency while a possible pretender for the throne sits waiting in the west. But let others worry for you, lucky Arria, shall marry.__________________________________________________________________________________________________The art work is not mine. It is a fanart of Prussia from Hetalia.Warning: This is a historical fantasy novel and therefore rape, racism, foul language, gore can all appear. While this novel isn't a smut there will be some sexual themes. Nothing too risque though, so don't get your hopes up.
8 169 - In Serial40 Chapters
Tracking Kelsie
Knowing everything is sometimes dangerous, 30-year-old Kelsie Conrad knows this better than most. Being part of the team assigned to the safety of all data and communications within the company is a great responsibility. Kelsie knows she has to disappear when reading the truth behind the company's intentions with a new invention; downloading the data to give to those who needed to know was the only thing stopping anyone from going ahead with their plan. Living under the radar and off the grid are no longer terms she glibly throws out in conversation; they are a reality. Using her skills to disappear, Kelsie is on the run, keeping two steps ahead of the company of assassins employed to hunt her down, who ask no questions and have no interest in the truth. Can Kelsie stay alive long enough to blow the whistle and save a life?
8 230 - In Serial9 Chapters
A Warm Bed & A Hot Shower
"People think being transported into another world is fun. But it's fucking not." "You think it's all saving the world, mythical treasures, and getting laid?" He yelled, "Life'll bash you on the head and stick it's dick up your ass!!!" "You see that horse over there?!" He pointed at the horse, "You might think it's harmless, but what if it's actually a monster pretending to be a horse?!? What if that tree over there is a trap?! What are you gonna do if the water you're standing in right now isn't water?!" "So shut the fuck up and eat that fucking food!" Word Length = 2000-2500 / Chapter (Sometimes it'll be higher) Please leave a review if you enjoyed it (or not), so that I may grow and be prosperous!
8 104 - In Serial36 Chapters
YAOS 1 - Limitless Adventures - Yet Another OP Story Book 1
December 23rd 2018: Book 1 is now up at Smashwords and at Amazon. December 30th 2018: V1.1.2 of YAOS Book 1 is out, some content additions, fixed typos. Amazon's enhanced typesetting now displays tables properly. YAOS is shown through the eyes of some genius athlete getting OP inside a VR, ah wait, Full Immersion game, ?F.I.O?. Not a Hero, not a Nerd, just a driven individual paying for mistakes made, biding time until he can return to the Real World. He isn't defined like you'd normally do it, you can pick his looks and name all on your own, just like you do in video games. Believe it or not, keeping his looks undefined is harder than you think. His backstory isn't expounded in detail, but it drives his choices. Book 1 isn't about depressing sob stories but about fun and rushing forward, pursuing new horizons. Oh, and you'll end on a cliffhanger! Well, most serials do, so you will probably expect that without being told explicitly. But it isn't that bad, there's a lot of reveals and more to come once this book, that is the first in a planned three-part series, is finally ready for release on amazon et al. The published version will have: 1.) Godawful speaker tags, I hate them, they make you stop thinking and speed up editing so much. In hindsight they should have been in to begin with. But I stand by my goals proclaimed earlier. You guys should think while reading, that is the whole point of the exercise. Apply the knowledge and ideas, improve yourself, get creative! 2.) Pretty colored tables, the damned blue boxes, a lot of work, 69 in one book. Finally fixed amazon's centering issue. Can't say I liked the hours needed to debug that. 3.) The promised Mitara chapters. 4.) A cover! 5.) And lastly, updated polished versions of several chapters. MC shares more of his past, some terrible chapters (esp. 32) finally work. Some new scenes, minor rewrites in parts. Text flow and other issues. The current challenge is to maintain essential ambiguity while satisfying people wanting to know more without thinking three steps ahead. Balancing one with the other is tough. The smut which was in remains, but the story told is not to be superseded by it. A 15+ rating for the first book is also important, not to mention, YAOS wasn't meant to contain any smut to begin with. If the Author can turn to writing full time his output should increase, so please support YAOS #1 once it does finally release. ~Thank You~ No maps so far, that should be in, but is really hard to get done right. Again, tips are appreciated. Update September 2017: Stubbed chapters, sorry guys, currently don't have time to upload them elsewhere, polishing book 1 and 2, writing 3, takes precedence. Book 1 is in heavy editing, too much to keep synced and continuing editing. I'd need a site which offers JS-free rapid managing of chapters and comments. Coding one myself or setting a premade up is out of scope until I'm done with the books. RRL-old offered that, nuff said. This is only here because the author believes in fairies, nobody reads this, most likely. October to December 2017: Life threw some curveballs. February 2018: Book 2 draft 1 completed, at ~150K words. Book 2 is fairly epic in scope, requires 1 rewritten chapter, some editing. Tables and miscellanea are in, but needs at least a grammar pass. March 2018: Book 3 at 28k words, first arc, rest needs serious planning for spin-off and satisfying conclusion. July 2018: Yet another proofing/editing session of books 1-3, 101+ chapters, ~300k words. B3 at 48k, starts out great, but no ETA, no wordcount limit, in flux. But prioritizing my writing cannot be done, I hate the delays as much as you, but you will prefer the whole released in a timely fashion rather than wait. Knowing myself how excruciating waiting can be, at least you'll get significantly polished versions and an ETA on book 2 by release of book 1. December 23rd 2018: Book 1 is now up at Smashwords and in the process at Amazon et. al.. . To all who wait patiently, offered feedback, thanks again!
8 143

