《That One Isekai》Letter 2.30 - That time I was reincarnated into another world and Ciel poured her heart out to me
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That Time I Got Sent to Another World Where All of the Girls Are Super Hot and Super Into Me Because I Am Super Strong and Have Very Powerful Abilities that God Gave to Me Because Me and Them Were Friends When I Was in Grade School and God Is Actually A Loli Who is Also in Love with Me Because I Am A Super Epic Person Who Will Defeat The Demon Lord Who Threatens The Entire World but the Demon Lord Actually is in Love With Me and the Demon Lord is a Super Hot Busty Babe Who is Actually Just Trying to Get My Attention Because I Have a Cellphone That Can Contact the Internet and Can Get Anything Shipped To Me Within 2 Days But I Barely Need It Because I Am Actually the Most Strongest Guy Alive Because I Have Super Strong Powers Like Being Able to Lift Your Mom Really Easily Which is Nearly Impossible Because Your Mom is So Fat But is Actually A Secret Anime Busty Babe Who is Really into Me Because I Am Super Cool and Better Than Your Dad Because He is Super Lame Which I Am Not
Letter 2.30 - That time I was reincarnated into another world and Ciel poured her heart out to me
I shivered as I walked back into the dining room. I couldn't believe what was happening. Ciel was about to confess her undying love to me. She hadn't said as much, specifically, but I couldn't think of anything else it could be. In anime, any time one of the cute girls asked to talk to somebody privately, it meant they wanted to confess. Real life almost certainly worked the same way. And she looked pretty shy right now, which was pretty uncharacteristic of her, based on the few hours I'd known her.
She was looking to the side, either averting her eyes from me out of nervousness, or else she found the chef statue particularly captivating. I couldn't entirely rule that out, since this one was wearing sunglasses and looked especially badass. But I was pretty sure it was the first thing, about her being desperately in love with me instead.
Ciel slapped her cheeks (face) to psych herself up, then abruptly decided to carboload on some breadsticks, for bravery. I glanced to look at that cool statue again, and noticed that a skeleton was walking by with a gold chest, headed into the [Panini] chamber! Whoah! I don't know what that was about, but it seemed way more interesting than this. Ciel was kind of taking a while to confess, anyways. It was cute, I guess, but I also really wanted to go check out what was going on in that chamber. Still.. she probably didn't realize that I already knew she was in love with me. I couldn't just tell her to hurry up. I had to be considerate of her feelings, and use subtlety. I quickly activated [Instantly Learn Skill] and learned [Subletting Basics - Lvl 1]. With this, I was invincible!
"So, what did you want to confess?" I asked her gently, with infinite subtlety and grace.
She looked up at me in confusion, with a gentle sprinkling of guilt. "Huh? Con... confess? I don't... think I'm doin' anything wrong. Am I?" She paused, rubbing her chin while she conducted some kind of dumb ethical audit on herself instead of just checking her Karma score like an intelligent person. I rolled my eyes internally, but also couldn't help but sigh; Baka Tomboys were the best type, after all.
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"Anyways, uh... if I did something wrong, sorry about that. But I... well, I had, uh, a question for ya, Hiro-ku- Hiro-sama."
I smiled gently from ear to ear, sweat beading on my face. T-this was really happening! I activated my [Camera] Cell Phone Arte, to record this moment to look back on in the years to come. My first confession! I could hardly contain my excitement!
"So... you uh, you mentioned that you, uh, asked Kamiko-chama to get Wanda out of jail, yeah?"
This was a bit of an odd lead-in, but I nodded anyways.
"So... you can talk to Kamiko, yeah? I mean, you're, like, able to ask her for favors and stuff?"
Huh? How did she know about Kamiko? It was true that I could call up Kamiko on my CODEC whenever I wanted, but that didn't explain how she knew about it. Kamiko was kind of popular here, for some reason. The fact that she was my childhood friend might be important somehow, or significant in ways I couldn't truly comprehend. Was that the sort of thing I could reveal? It could potentially paint a giant target on my back, and even if I was extremely powerful, I wasn't EXTREMELY extremely powerful, so I had to be careful. If I was constantly getting into big life-or-death anime battles, I'd never get anything important done! But at the same time, if Ciel knew I was friends with God, she'd probably think I was pretty cool!
"Yeah," I replied. "We're childhood friends, actually."
Ciel's eyes lit up, tiny stars popping into the middle part of her eye, the part that has the colors in it.
"Y-yeah? Me too, bro! Uh, I mean, well, like, I didn't know her in real life or anything. But I, y'know, I mean, I watched all of her Visitations, and she'd usually read my Devotions and Tithes and would respond and stuff. Y-you heard her, right? Earlier, she said my name! I mean, that... that was pretty great, huh?"
"Okay."
"S-so, um... I mean..." She grit her teeth. "This is a little awkward and all, but I dunno if I'll ever get a better chance. Can..."
She hesitated again. I glanced over at the [Panini] Chamber, where Skeleton was now hammering a sandwich on an anvil, grilling and pressing it in the process. Sparks flew from the crust as his hammer struck home. Back over here, Ciel seemed like she was reaching the moment of truth!
"Can you introduce me to Kamiko?" she asked, the words exploding from her blushing face. I stared at her, with a deadpan expression on my face.
"You know she's like ten, right?"
Ciel smacked me over the head with her mace in a hilarious visual gag that shattered my skull and dropped me to the floor. Thankfully, even if I didn't have resistance to her [Tsukkomi] element attacks, I still had a massive health pool, and her attack had only done about 10 damage, plus an extra 5 for each bone shard that had embedded itself into my think-meat. I turned on my [Ultra Max Regeneration], shedding the bone fragments like dandruff and growing new ones.
"That's not th'kind of introduction I wanted, Hiro-kun!" she chastised me, blushing. "I meant as a friend, okay? As a friend!" She crossed her arms, looking away to hide the rising color in her cheeks.
"B-besides, she's not ten. She's... y'know. She's like thousands of years old. So even if that sort of thing were..." she shook her head furiously, clearing her thoughts with physical force.
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"Anyways. Um... I guess I'm making a pretty bad impression, here."
I shrugged. I had a sneaking suspicion that she might not have called me here to actually confess, but like any good desperate anime virgin, I was prepared to cling to the barest shred of a hope that I might get to date her. Maybe if I introduced her to Kamiko, she'd want to thank me by falling in love with me! That seemed like a pretty solid plan, all things considered.
"Well, I can't make any promises," I lied, to lower her expectations. "But I'll see what I can do."
With that, I dropped to my knee, and was about to call Kamiko on my CODEC, when Ciel suddenly rushed forward and gave me a hug, smashing my nose against her breastplate. W-wow! My face was buried between her b-b-boobs?! I could feel the shape of her breasts through her armor, and was marveling at how hard and metallic they were. T-this was pretty erotic, wasn't it?
"Thanks, Hiro-kun! I knew I could count on you!"
"D-don't thank me yet!" I told her, activating [Noclip] to escape before prolonged contact with a girl could overwhelm my senses. "You can thank me with something nice after I talk to Kamiko!"
She stepped back, giving me room to open my CODEC and call Kamiko. The line picked up almost instantly.
"Kamiko Demiurgos welcomes you, Hiro-chan~" she hummed. "It's so good to hear from you ~♥~! Hey, hey, did you catch my stream? What did you think?"
"It was definitely a stream," I complimented her. "Is that how your Visitations or whatever normally go?"
"Yup!" she chirped happily. "Every week, I draw divine power from the Heart and distribute it to my kin and followers~"
Huh. I always figured that religion would be more... religious. But then again, I'd never been in an actual church back on earth. I hadn't been able to justify buying a season pass to one when I wasn't really religious myself.
"So!" she continued. "Congratulations on becoming the [Legendary Hero]! I'm super proud for you!"
"As you should be. I am very great."
She gave a proud chuckle for some reason, as if she was the one being praised.
"A-anyways," she replied. "What can I do for you, Hiro-san? You know I always love yo- I mean... l-love to talk to you." She stuttered randomly in that last sentence. I shook my head. She was always biting her tongue. It was cute and all, but still very headpattable.
"Well, I needed a favor..."
She let out a sigh. "Is it that mongrel dog of yours again? Wanda, was it? Is she in trouble?"
"No, no," I started to explain, then hesitated. I craned my ear to the side with [Long Range Hearing]
"M-miss! Please! Think of the children!"
"Wan! That croquembouche knows what it did, wan!" (TL note: croquembouche means croque-en-bouche)
*CRASH*
"My leg!"
"Wahaha, wan~!"
"Get the net! Roger, GET THE NET!"
"Yes," I corrected myself. "But that's unrelated to why I called. You see, I have one of your followers in my harem, and she-"
"Huh? H-harem?! You meant party, right?"
I shrugged audibly. "Sure. Anyways, Ciel wanted to-"
"Hang on a second, Hiro-kun." She ordered, her voice terse. After a moment, she let out a noise of indignant rage. "W-what the heck is this? Geez! She's pretty! Why is she so pretty?!"
I glanced at Ciel, who was looking over at me hopefully, her blue-gray eyes glittering. She had a youthful face, with clean, but aesthetically messy blue hair, complete with an ahoge. She had an athletic build, but still had curves up to factory specifications, and she of course had very big boobies, which was almost mandatory for members of my harem. Most importantly of all, she exuded a powerful, youthful energy and boundless positivity, an endless zeal for life and a genuine desire to help those around her.
"She's okay," I replied. "But, anyways, she was asking-"
"Hiro-san! You better not be doing anything with her! My [Paladins] are off-limits, okay? You hear me?"
Huh? 'Doing anything'? What was that supposed to mean?
"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked. "We've already done all kinds of things, you have to be more specific."
"A-all kinds of things?!" Kamiko gasped. "W-what's that supposed to mean?!"
"That's literally what I just asked you."
"W-well, fine! Tell me what you have done, then."
I sighed. "Well, I met her, we talked to Wanda, then we went to your Visitation, then we walked outside, then she watched me skateboard, then she went inside me, then we went to a restaurant, and talked to Skeletony, and then we ate dinner, and now I'm calling you."
"W-wait, what was that thing in the middle?" she asked.
"She went inside me?"
"Y-yeah!" she replied. "W-when you say-"
"We went to a restaurant?"
"W-what? N-no, Hiro-kun. I already said the first thing was-"
"We talked to Skeletony?"
"A-are you listening to me, Hiro-san? It was the first one, about her going ins-"
I sighed. "Look, Kamiko, I don't have time to keep guessing what you mean, alright? Don't forget that the world is in danger, here. I'm the [Legendary Hero], right?"
Kamiko gasped as if she'd forgotten that the world was in peril. "T-that's right! We shouldn't waste time! You called me for a reason, right? Well, what is it?"
"Pareiso-san wanted to know if I could introduce you to-"
"Agh, sorry Hiro-kun... I'm, uh, busy at the moment. I've got all this fanar- I mean, all these scrolls and Illuminations and such to sort through. Maybe next time, okay?"
"Well, she just seemed really excited is all. And you know, [Legendary Hero]?"
Kamiko sighed. "Is this actually important for saving the world, Hiro-chan?"
I was about to answer in the affirmative instantly, but then thought about it a bit more. Ciel was the one who wanted to meet Kamiko. It wasn't actually my dream, so I guess she was right, it really wasn't important.
"...nah. I guess not."
"Maybe later, then. So, I'm sure you want a hint about where to go next, right?" she asked.
!!!
That's right! I'd gotten so distracted by eating [Italian] food and finding an [Elite Four] that I'd forgotten that the whole reason I'd come into town was to find an [Elite Four]!
"Thanks for reminding me!" I shouted. "I can always count on you, Kamiko. Gotta go!"
"H-huh?! W-wait, Hiro-chan, I was going to tell y-"
I ended the CODEC call as quickly as I could. I couldn't believe that I'd forgotten to look for hints! I'd have to go bug random people as soon as possible! I stood up, and started to walk towards the door.
"Y-yo!" Ciel called out from behind me. "How did.. uh, how'd it go? Can she, um... can we?"
Uh-oh. That's right, she had wanted to talk to Kamiko about something. I gulped, turning to face her. I could tell her what Kamiko had said, but she'd be disappointed, and might decide not to fall in love with me. If I told her that Kamiko said yes instead, she would probably think I was totally cool and dependable! Plus, I was pretty sure I could bully Kamiko into doing it later.
"Y-yeah, she'd love to," I lied. "We'll hammer the details out of her later."
I started to move for the door again, only to have Wanda burst in, her face covered in cream and choux pastry scraps. Her hair was wild, and one of her sleeves was ripped. She slammed the door shut and barred it with her comically large spoon. Her eyes darted from me to Ciel and back, before grinning a smile casually.
"Wan! Wanda is back, Master!"
"Welcome back," I replied. (TL Note: "Welcome back" means おかえりなさい)
"There's a bunch of crazy people out there, wan!" Wanda informed me, pushing one of the cool chef statues in front of the door. "They're making up all kinds of weird stories, wan!"
I glanced towards the door, nodding, as somebody started to pound on it and shout from the other side. I was glad Wanda was back. Now all we needed was Bonbon to return, and we'd be ready to head out! With narratively-convenient timing, Skeletony walked out holding a silver tray, upon which sat the third-most-beautiful sandwich I'd ever seen. Bonbon walked behind him, holding the tail of the extra-long doily placed on the tray.
"Ladies and gentleman," Skeletony called out, his voice a solemn hush. "I present to all of youse, one of the greatest of the [Mystery Recipes]: the [Proscuitto di Pharma Panini]. A sandwich so delicious, so powerful, that it can cure basically anything. Any injury. Any [Status] condition. Any sickness. Give this to a guy on the brink'a death, and he'll be back to full health in no time flat."
I stared at it in shock. A food that could heal anything?! That was practically a cheat all on its own! And Skeletony had just whipped on up no problem?! Still, I wasn't going to let a gift like that go to waste! It'd go great in my [Dimension Box], where I could think about using it in a tough battle before deciding to save it for something more important, forever. I started to activate my [Skill], when to my shock, he turned and presented it to Bonbon!
Nani the hell?! Why was she getting to eat it? She was only missing a single arm! It'd be better to wait until she'd lost more limbs before eating it. I could only shake my head at this poor showing of sub-optimal sandwichery.
Bonbon reached out towards the sandwich, her hands trembling. She picked it up carefully and made a big show of eating it, treating it like it was some kind of holy object, or the beloved pet of a king. She sank her teeth into it, taking a first bite. I waited patiently for her to finish the sandwich, staring at Ciel out of the corner of my eyes and wondering if [X-Ray Vision] would let me see through her clothes. It probably would, I decided, but I didn't want to risk accidentally turning her into a skeleton with the X-rays.
Eventually, Bonbon finished the last bite, and with it, the sandwich. A surge of green light enveloped her like an aura, with intense beams of green light shooting from her eyes and mouth like spotlights. She floated slightly into the air and spun around, like a princess at the end of a kid's movie, where the curse had finally been broken. I crossed my fingers in hopes that this might remove whatever curse was causing her to avoid my headpats.
The light enveloped her left arm, wrapping around it and extending from her stump, a glowing green outline that took on the appearance of her missing hand. The light grew brighter, then faded suddenly. When the light disappeared, she was left whole, with her arm fully regrown.
She looked down at it, tears forming her eyes. She lifted it, flexing her fingers, before clenching it into a fist. She looked up at Skeletony with a heartfelt expression of gratitude. It was a touching moment, which was only slightly ruined by me throwing a chair out of the nearest window, shattering it.
"Alright," I said, stepping through the broken window as the rest of the people in the room turned to stare at me. "Let's get a move on. There's no time to waste."
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