I think i managed to get whiplash from how quickly i turned to face Nat. She really doesn't seem to be giving up on finding out things about my mom. Like no offence but i want some privacy, its not like she needs to know everything. I'm in control of my own life!

"Um to be honest I don't think it's actually any of your business. I don't really feel comfortable telling you"

This was obviously not the response any of the Avengers were expecting as they all looked bewildered. But I don't care, they've already taken my free will. Although i was starting to feel uncomfortable under their gazes, especially Nat and Steve.

I was then told rather sternly by Nat that i needed to answer, but i kept silent. I'm not giving in that easily! Also, there was no way i could tell her without her knowing the leverage Madame B used on me. But now that I'm thinking about it, I never did find out how she managed to get that information.

I'm pretty sure the others were finding our little conversation funny but i was ready to run if this girl was going to keep pushing me8. I'd like to say i did grow a bit of a backbone whilst in the Red Room and that I'm much happier with it.

But i start hearing that agitating voice that belongs to Nat again. Can she not take the hint, and shut up! At this point I'm not even fully listening to her but I can hear her rambling on about how important it is that they know everything. I'm fed up so i decide to shut her up whilst guilt tripping her a little.

"Omg, please just shut up, okay!? It's none of your business. All of this talk about my dead mom isn't what i want to talk about! You've taken my freedom and are talking about something that generally makes me upset so please shut up".

In the end I'm screaming at her. And just to add dramatic effect, i run away. I mean its not like i can get very far anyway.

As the icon herself would say, 'when there's too much drama, all you gotta do is walk awaaaayyyyyy'

As i run i can hear chairs scraping against the floor, but I don't hear anyone come after me, and i am very thankful for that. At least someone has a sense of privacy and guilt, and i can only guess who it is which really annoys me to be honest. If Peter comes across as such a nice kid, and understands peoples emotion how could he be so blind to not see how much i liked him. Key word liked.

Another thing i learnt in the Red Room is that you don't kneed to forgive or forget. You can hate. I hate that everyone thinks that you have to be the bigger person, when you don't. It's so stupid.

I'd like to say I've changed for the better in the last couple of months even if others don't agree.

While i was on my little expedition, i came across a lab i presumed was Tony's or Bruce's. It was full of technology, so i looked around for a computer that didn't seem to be connected to anything. I wont lie it was pretty easy to find one but i still tried to be inconspicuous about it just in case there were cameras catching me in the act. I mean i still ran like hell after it so that probably ruined it but I'm sure it will be fine because i hid the laptop in my clothes. In the end i just run all over the base trying to find a little nook or cranny in order to stay hidden.

I do in the end, which is a little cupboard by a vent, which was 1/4 full of cleaning supplies with more than enough space to fit me comfortably inside. It wasn't even that high up, so it was pretty easy for me to get into without any help. When I got in, it was really dark, but i could still use the computer as the keys lit up.

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My first priority is finding out all i can on Madame B. I couldn't do anything like this as the WiFi was connected to the Red Room router, whereas now i can disconnect form the towers WiFi and find a singular router. You wouldn't believe how many rich people have this to protect themselves. And there are many in NewYork to work with.

I also disabled everything that could track what i was doing on the computer. I then used the skills from the Red Room to try and find my file. Don't ask me how i was successful because I don't know. My brain just knew what to do.

When i saw my file i also saw a tab attached to my moms name, but i decided to check that in a bit. Whilst i was checking out my file i was getting goosebumps. There was information in it that traced back to 2 years ago. It had details of mine and Peters big argument along with pictures of me, my house and school. Surely them coming to-get me wasnt planned was it? Madame B wouldn't lie like that would she? No, no way. There's no way anther person would betray me. But as i continue to scroll i realise it was true. I was fucking played.

Why the fuck does this keep happening to me! Why did i end up with a neglectful mom, a supposed best friend that didnt trust me, some crazy ass powers i still don't have a hold of and some organisation knowing all my secrets!? I try not to think about Jason. What if he was in on it. What if I've admitted my feelings to someone who's reporting back to Madame B!?

IM FUCKING PISSED. I actually though somebody wanted me because i was useful, but i was used again. I feel like i have no one to trust anymore. I was starting to see the red room as my home.

Just as i was about to close the laptop I remembered my mom's file. Through glassy eyes i brought up her file. There she was as a child with the same background my picture was taken in. A member of the Red Room. I didn't want to read more, but i was drawn to as i saw a recent picture of my supposed dead mom, seen with Nat. Did she leave me and fake her death? Did she think i was a burden to her? Was i not good enough for her? I can't remember doing anything that would have pushed her over the edge.

I couldn't take anymore. I smashed the computer and ran to me room, not caring who saw me in this fragile state. Everyone was lying too me. I felt like i was in the Truman Show. It didn't feel like my life anymore, and I couldn't handle the pain. It seemed i always gave too much and I'm fucking sick of it. I'm fed up of everything. I cant seem to trust anyone so ill just give up. I don't seem to have anyone to really fight for. They're all actors in this silly little game i call life. If they didn't want to give me any mercy, they won't get any back.

But first a rest, so I'm headed back to my room for a nap.

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Everyone was shocked by Emma's outburst. Of course they thought that's her mothers death would be a sore topic for her but they didnt realise how sore it really was. Everyone was blaming Nat for what happened due to her lack of sympathy.

"Look, I'm sorry if i was too upfront with her, but we need to fund out what happened. I mean we've all agreed to try and help her adjust by also finding out what happened to her. I just want to make sure she's ok and that she's not suffering. I'm sorry that i actually care!" Nat stated very calmly whilst walking off.

The rest of the Avengers just looked at each other knowing that it was hard for Nat. She really cared for Emma, even though they didnt spend much time together and it was one of the few times Nat showed emotion to a serious situation. They all thought that the pair would be good for each other.

The rest of the Avengers stayed silent for a while until Peter brought up different ways to help the both of them. And that they should also be on the lookout for anymore Hydra or Red Room spies. Peter was so scared for Emma, and the others could clearly see that. He just wanted Emma to be safe. They all did. They also still planned to have a movie night but maybe skip the team building exercises because everyone was tired and just needed a break. They just wanted Emma to be happy and to be part of their big old family.

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I walked away super annoyed at the rest of the team. This is why I don't care for many things, because people can use it against you. I dint know why i have such a maternal like pull to Emma, but i do and i cant help it. I think it might be the guilt of what happened between me and her mom, and also Emma herself. UGHH, I don't know how to explain it and it confuses me.

Due to my foggy eyes, I don't see the oncoming figure clearly until we bump into each other. Only then do I realise that its Emma. I was about to apologise until i saw her cheeks enflamed with tears flowing freely form them. Without a second thought I pull her into a tight hug. I don't think she's mentally knows where she is as she hugs me back as if she's scared ill leave, which I don't ever plan on doing. I don't know how long we stay there, but she fell asleep.

I take her face in my hands, and use my fingers to rub away her tear streaks whilst carrying her over my shoulder to her room. O didn't really know how else to carry her.

I then left her in her room, because I'm sure she wont appreciate what happened when she wakes up.

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Also i now that this chapter was boring but I'm just trying to create some relationships. I really hope its not too boring.