《Dungeons Are Bad Business》Volume 2 Chapter 33
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Vee heard rather than saw Alforde kick the day’s last challenger off the stage for the fourth time, and he risked opening his eyes. The level 23 [Trident Afficionado] landed hard on the ground below, and to the [Dungeon Master]’s great relief the flickers of golden light surrounding her body were nowhere to be seen. It’d been two days since Vee had gotten his new pseudo-skill, and he wasn’t really getting better at handling it. The shimmers and shines made him nauseous, and knowing so much about a person just by looking at them took its toll on Vee in other ways. His limbs were weak and shaky, and his shirt was soaked with sweat.
Letting himself slump back against his chair, Vee looked up at the ceiling and said, “You know what, Reginald? I don’t know about this new sight thing. It actually sucks really hard. It’s genuinely so much worse than [Second Sight] or even [Third Sight] for that matter. I want it gone.”
He heard the hat shuffling on the desk next to him, but was too tired to look over at his [Majordomo].
“You’ll adapt to it eventually, Boss. It’s just going to take a few days. Today was better than yesterday, right? You only dry heaved twice!”
Vee groaned. “That’s hardly an improvement worth writing home about.”
“But it is an improvement. Just wait until tomorrow! You might not even throw up at all!”
He closed his eyes once more, knowing that it was pointless to argue with Reginald when the hat was determined to be annoyingly optimistic. He sighed as cool relief filled the back of his eyelids, letting it wash over his thoughts and wishing that it would never go away. He stayed like that until Alforde came up with the day’s earnings, then summoned Cecil to help with the count. The [Excellent Spreadsheet] floated over to the chest and started recording quantities.
Since Vee had been so messed up with his new sight all day, he hadn’t dared use [Boost Drops]. Unfortunately, that meant they’d only gotten two shards of chaos from all the day’s runs, which wasn’t great. However, it wasn’t all bad news. Twenty-six adventurers had tried the full dungeon, and another ten did the first three floors. They’d made a bunch of fleurs. Of course, the high traffic also meant that a lot of Crestheart’s minions had been destroyed – including almost half of his preciously scarce skeleton lancers – so Vee needed to hurry up and order more minions soon.
Truthfully, the dungeon was starting to approach the size where he’d need to make regularly recurring orders, but Vee didn’t feel up to getting that all figured out just then. All he wanted to do was sit in his chair and exist until his head stopped feeling as if someone had dropped a piano on it.
Reginald and Alforde finished counting up the last of the day’s fleurs, and Alforde carried them into the dungeon’s vault. As the entrance winked out of existence, the armorsoul returned to Vee’s chair and helped the [Dungeon Master] to his feet.
“Let’s go see Juniper,” Alforde said as he dragged Vee toward the stairs. “You look awful and I bet she can whip something up to help you feel better.”
Vee mumbled something in response, but it wasn’t really coherent. Taking that as agreement, Alforde basically carried his friend down to the Lobby.
A handful of adventurers were still inside, snacking on cakes, cookies, and various teas as they discussed their runs and brainstormed strategies for their next attempts to defeat Crestheart. Heavily highlighted guides were scattered here and there, and every head turned to look at Vee and Alforde as they walked inside.
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Vee met their gazes with bleary eyes and dimly realized that they all looked gravely concerned. Do I really look that bad?
[Public Relations -1]
Crap. Have to be more careful about my image, the [Dungeon Master] thought as Alforde helped him into a chair and Juniper came over.
“Vee! What’s wrong?”
“He got a new pseudo-skill yesterday and it’s really taking a toll on him,” Reginald said.
“Can you make a tonic or a potion for him?” Alforde asked.
Juniper nodded. “Of course! I’ve got plenty of fresh herbs and flowers to work with. What hurts?”
“It started with my eyes, but now it’s my everything,” Vee mumbled.
“Got it. Let me see what I can whip up, okay?”
The menu at the lobby had returned to its original size and was apparently going to be expanding even further soon. Though the |Bandit Lord| remained free, the members of the Open Call had managed to restore the majority of trade and commerce throughout the continent, and shipments were coming into Oar’s Crest much more often. Two large boxes intended for Juniper had been waiting at the gate to Westown that morning, and apparently more would be arriving in the coming days.
Juniper hurried back to the counter and started grabbing bottles and jars. They were all filled to the brim, and she twisted them open in turn. Pulling pinches out of some and grabbing heaps of others, the [Herbalist] mixed up a potion. Once her ingredients were together, she put her hands on the glass and yellow light surrounded it, filling the air with a new scent. It wasn’t particularly pleasant though. The distinct reek of boiled carrots mixed its way through the lobby, and Vee nearly threw up when its source was gently put down in front of him.
“Drink this. I know it smells horrid, but it’ll make you feel better,” the [Herbalist] said. Vee eyed it skeptically, but ultimately did as instructed, wincing at the first sip. Sadly, the flavor wasn’t any better than the smell. In addition to the aforementioned boiled carrots, it tasted like white pepper, mint jelly, and fresh lime. All the flavors battled for supremacy in Vee’s mouth, and it took nearly all of the [Dungeon Master]’s formidable willpower to finish the rest of the concoction.
He put down the empty glass and waited. At first, nothing felt any different, and Vee’s temper prickled, but then a warm tingle filled the tips of his fingers and toes. Like he was meditating back in the academy, the sensation blossomed across the rest of his body. The pounding in his skull grew weaker and weaker until it vanished completely, and when Vee opened his eyes again, he saw that his vision had cleared.
He marveled at the new decorations around the room – another boon of resumed trade – and straightened up as his energy returned.
Juniper grinned and cocked her head to the side.
“That was amazing,” Vee said. “What’d you make me?”
“It’s a new healing tisane I’ve been experimenting with,” she said. “Helps with mental fatigue. It’s a mix of gummy-carrot powder and a few rare herbs from New Sally that I’ve been waiting to get for weeks.+”
Vee winced. Gummy carrots were, as their name implied, carrots with a distinctly gelatinous texture. They came from the northern parts of the continent, and were popular with health-conscious people. Allegedly, they were fantastic for eyesight, but after having been forced to eat them on a regular basis as a kid by his mother and father, Vee hadn’t touched one in years. He didn’t plan on touching another for at least that long.
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He asked for and a received a glass of water, and found that he was strong enough to stand up on his own an hour or so later. The lobby was nearly empty by then, but as he was wary of losing more Public Relations, he still did his best to keep from swaying as he walked out. Thanking Juniper and bidding her good night, Vee headed back toward the city’s gate.
Navigating the snow was a bit tricky, and more than once Alforde’s gauntlet prevented Vee from falling. Side by side they made their way back to the boarding house.
Vee wanted nothing more than to fall into bed and go straight to sleep, but Alforde made the little hemming sound he often did when he wanted to talk about something, so Vee waved his hand and said, “What’s on your mind?”
The armorsoul rocked back and forth, then said, “I was wondering if we could start taking a day or two off each week. I think that having a regular break would help me with, you know.”
As he said those last words, the armorsoul gestured across the room to where he’d stored Slammy. Vee looked at the hammer and over at his friend as he considered the request. Losing a day’s earnings would hurt their ability to keep up with their repayments to Sacre – the amount by which Crestheart outpaced the weekly increases was shrinking each week and would soon vanish entirely if he didn’t come up with another way to boost revenue once again – but this was a request from his best friend. Was there really anything to even think about here?
Reginald looked over at him with a frown, and Vee wondered if the hat wanted to veto the suggestion. He waited for his [Majordomo] to speak up, but Reginald stayed quiet.
The effects of Juniper’s tisane were starting to wear off, and the pounding that was quickly returning to Vee’s skull tempted him to push the decision off until the morning, but a nagging sensation in the back of his thoughts told him that it wasn’t a good idea to do that. Things between him and Alforde were improving, but they were still delicate. There were other ways to make money, but not many ways to show his friend how much he valued his wellbeing.
With that perspective, the decision basically made itself. Vee nodded and said, “Sure, we’ll start taking one day every week off. Two is probably more than we can afford though right now. How does starting next Saintsday sound? We can announce it to the adventurers in the coming days so that nobody can complain about us just springing it on them.”
“That’s fine with me,” Alforde said with a nod. “I think one day will really help me a lot. Now, I won’t keep you up any longer, Vee. You look like you need some rest.”
Vee laughed and sat down on his bed. He lay back and closed his eyes.
“That was well-handled, Boss,” Reginald said quietly as Alforde sat down across the room to read a book before bed. “I think the big guy is really coming around.”
Vee murmured agreement, but was too tired to respond properly. Instead, he thought about how nice it would be to have a day each week off. The more he thought about it, the more he liked. It’d be nice to have dedicated time to experiment with more ghosts and traps, let Do and the rest of the [Dungeon Maintainers] really look over all the dungeon’s tiles, and take care of all the other things he regularly put off because he was so busy with Crestheart each day.
Tomorrow he’d start thinking of ways to offset the lost revenue.
For now, all he cared about was sleep.
The next afternoon, Hanako barged into the dungeon’s office and held up a large blue crystal. It was covered in complex etchings, and pulsed with steady white light. There were no cracks or stress marks in its various facets, which was a pleasant surprise.
“What’s that?” Reginald asked.
The [Enchantress] beamed and set the crystal down on the table. Clearly proud of herself, she said, “I managed to make a C-Rank crystal last night! My dad taught me a new skill for holding my tools while I draw my etchings, and this was the result! I think I can replicate it, too! Isn’t that awesome?”
Vee’s eyes ached – though Reginald had been right and he was doing better today compared to the day’s before – but he got up and went to take a closer look at the crystal all the same. Encouragement was important, after all.
“Wow, it’s really nice, Hanako. What skill is it?”
“[Frost Bind].”
“What’s that do?”
Hanako shrugged. “Nothing special, sadly. It’s a skill normally used by [Ice Sculptors] when they’re working on big pieces, so I don’t think it’ll really have much use here. But still, it’s C-Rank! I think I can make more, too, so I’m going to try and update some of the dungeon’s traps today! Wish me luck, okay?”
Vee smiled at his intern’s enthusiasm. “Of course. I’m sure you’ll do fine though. If possible, can you try and make C-Rank versions of [Icicle Spear] and [Snowball Mine] first? We need to replace a bunch of those throughout the dungeon anyways and getting an upgraded version would be great.”
Hanako threw a snappy salute as she headed down to her workshop. “Can do, Vee! I’ll bring them up later!”
The [Dungeon Master] took out his notebook as she left and flipped to the section where he came up with room concepts. He didn’t know how powerful C-Rank versions of all the traps would be, but he was excited to find out.
Main Character Sheets:
Vee Vales
Primary Class: Ghost Maestro (Locksmagister University), Level 29
Secondary Class: Dungeon Master (Oar’s Crest), Level 19
Tertiary Class: Guy-Who-Takes-Things-WAY-Too-Far (Self), Level 5
Might: 13
Wit: 31
Faith: 21
Adventurousness: 7
Ambition: 14
Plotting: 18
Charisma: 13
Devious Mind: 22
Leadership: 17
Guts: 13
Intimidating Presence: 10
Citizenship: 20
Public Relations: 5 (-1)
Determination: 1
Alforde Armorsoul:
Primary Class: Hammer Afficionado (Self), Level 21
Secondary Class: Right-hand man (Vee Vales), Level 13 (+1)
Tertiary Class: Dungeon Champion (Oar’s Crest), Level 14
Additional Class: Glaciernaut (Sacha Silverblade), Level 4
Might: 39
Wit: 12
Faith: 26
Adventurousness (Bound – Vee Vales): 8
Endurance: 20
Intimidating Presence: 12
Heart of a Champion: 6
Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 8
Vigilance: 6
Vanity: 2
Reginald:
Primary Class: Core Spirit (Unknown), Level ???
--~%@(%[email protected] &% (*$ #e !i$$ (#$%#$%#[email protected]!)~--, #[email protected]& ????
Secondary Class: Loudmouth (Self), Level 38
Tertiary Class: Majordomo (Vee Vales), Level 15
Additional Class: Announcer (Vee Vales), Level 8
Might: 1
Wit: 33
Faith: 12
Ambition: 27
Greed: 22
Deceptiveness: 27
Manipulativeness: 37
$#&*[email protected]!!
Loyalty: 46
Patience: 9 (+1)
[#&%%%@%!#@__--#%]
[email protected]#!! @#[email protected][email protected]#
@#[email protected]%%^
Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 7
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