《A Suspicious Lack of Horses》Body: 35 - Ash
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"Now this takes me back." Greg chuckled as he sat around Tessa's living room with Tessa, Sarah, Rachel, and Debbie. "Of course, some of you were smaller…" He muttered, looking between Sarah and Debbie.
"I could sit on your head if that helps." Debbie offered with a wink.
"Debbie, I will end you." Tessa growled, and Debbie just stuck her tongue out at her.
Greg looked between them with a frown. "Is this how people feel when they see me and Victor interact? I can't tell if you two are friends or enemies."
"We're best friends!" Debbie grinned, winking at Tessa.
"She's an annoying imp I can't get away from." Tessa grumbled, rolling her eyes.
"Aw, you know you love me!" Debbie snickered.
"I'd love you more if you stopped making moves on my boyfriend." Tessa replied, giving her a stink eye.
Debbie rolled her eyes. "Oh, you know I'm kidding! I would never do anything with my best friend's man!"
Greg blinked as he looked between the two, before turning to Tessa. "So you just have a thing for people who aggravate you, huh?"
Tessa flushed. "I don't know what you're talking about." She muttered in embarrassment.
Greg chuckled, shaking his head, before turning to Rachel. "So… you and Carlos, huh?"
Rachel froze, flushing. "Who- who told you that?!?"
"Victor. Like… five minutes ago? Us and Casey are getting lunch." Greg explained.
Rachel grumbled under her breath, before letting out a sigh. "We're… trying. He's sweet, but- I don't know. He has a history."
"He does…" Greg nodded slowly. "But don't we all? The past is the past because it's past. You have to look at how he is now, not how he was. People can change- people do change, all the time. I wouldn't let my fifteen year old self within ten feet of Tessa, but that isn't who I am anymore. So don't worry about what he's done, worry about what he's doing."
Rachel nodded slowly. "I guess…"
Greg turned to Sarah next. "So, what about you? Any boys catching your eye?" He paused. "Or girls, I suppose. No judgment here."
Sarah flushed, shaking her head. "I-I'm waiting for someone special." She muttered.
Greg nodded. "Ah, right the whole…" He trailed off as Sarah's flush deepened. "Uh… nevermind." He coughed awkwardly, hesitating slightly as something occurred to him. "Though… Well, you know, everyone is special. That's like… how people work? Everyone is different. You just need to find someone whose different matches your different. Which… well, is kinda the same as saying someone is special. Hm. Uh, my point is that part of figuring out if someone is special or not is giving them a chance. Even if someone seems like they're just like everyone else, you never know what's going on under the surface. So, you know, don't be too dismissive."
Tessa snorted. "You say, as the man who needed me to make the first move."
"And I didn't dismiss you." Greg replied with a grin. "Besides, I carefully considered every potential partner! I've just never been sure I'm working off the right data…"
Tessa rolled her eyes. "Okay, enough gossip. What do you guys want to do?"
Debbie sighed. "I wish we'd managed to keep our game manuals… we never got to play our campaign."
"Oh! I actually do have them!" Greg exclaimed, recreating his phone and opening up his files. "See? I downloaded a bunch of different game manuals off the internet before all this crap, including GURPS! We'll have to remake the campaign, obviously, but we can still play!"
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"Could we make a new campaign?" Sarah asked hesitantly. "The last one was a bit… childish."
"And whose fault was that?" Tessa commented, raising an eyebrow at her.
Sarah flushed. "Debbie's?"
"Whoa, hey, no! My fairies were cool!" Debbie retorted.
"I actually kinda liked the idea of a princess facing extreme danger to save her kingdom from destruction." Greg commented with a shrug. "Classic motivation, high stakes… plus there were giant robots!"
"Might hit a bit too close to home right now…" Rachel muttered.
They all paused at that. "Yeah… fair point." Greg muttered. "Hey, maybe we could do a campaign about something normal? Like high school drama or something?"
"Ugh, high school was bad enough on its own. I don't need to pretend to go through it again." Tessa replied, making a face.
"Oh! We could be contestants on a game show!" Debbie exclaimed. "Every week there are different events and challenges we have to complete to get points, so we can win the big prize at the end!"
"That's a good idea! Would you guys prefer to be a team, or competing against each other?" Greg asked.
"A team!" Sarah replied. "Otherwise it's just like a board game… plus, it's more fun to work together!"
"Until the end. Then it's a free for all!" Debbie grinned evilly, rubbing her hands together.
Tessa rolled her eyes. "Debbie, no."
Debbie tsked, leaning back and crossing her arms. "Killjoy."
"So, teams." Greg muttered. "Which means we'd need other teams. Would you guys prefer more puzzles or physical challenges? Obviously we'll have both, but which would you prefer the focus to be on? Oh! There needs to be a scheming aspect too! Tricking the other contestants to get ahead, making alliances, getting betrayed or betraying yourselves! Gotta find a use for those social skills, you know?" Greg chuckled evilly.
"Yeeesss!" Debbie agreed excitedly, copying Greg's evil tone. "I'm gonna do all the betrayal!"
"No! Then no one will trust us!" Sarah protested.
"Ah, no one will trust me." Debbie grinned evilly. "We'll have you be the trustworthy one. Then, when we need to really screw someone over, bam! You blideside them with a betrayal!"
Sarah scowled. "I'm not betraying anyone!"
"Hey, you want to win right?" Debbie asked.
"Not if it means being a bad person!" Sarah retorted.
"Okay, guys, this is great roleplay, but maybe save it for the actual game, huh?" Greg chuckled.
The five of them continued to hammer out the details of the campaign, eventually joined by Victor and Casey after they finished lunch. They were discussing how they wanted to build their characters, whether to include magic or not, when Greg froze, before turning to Tessa. "Oh, shit, your water just broke."
Tessa paused as she attempted to process that, before her eyes widened and she jumped to her feet. "Oh, crap! We have to- uh… shit, where do we go to have a baby!?! Why have we not figured this out before now?!?"
Greg raised an eyebrow at her. "Tessa? Smoke person, remember?" The pregnant Tessa copy waddled out as Greg created a padded table in the middle of the room, which he helped her lay on. "Now-"
"Wait!" Tessa exclaimed. "What are you going to do?!?"
Greg blinked. "Dissolve everything that isn't a baby? Then, if the baby turns out to be me, dissolve that too?"
"Wait, that's an option?" Victor interjected.
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"Well… yeah?" Greg shrugged. "Even though my smoke is set like this, it's still my smoke… every other body I've made out of smoke has just been me. I hope somehow by going through the pregnancy process, something will be different, but… I just don't know." Greg finished with a sigh.
Victor blinked. "I feel like I should have been informed."
"Yes!" Casey exclaimed. "I've been getting excited about having a kid! You can't just pull the rug out from under us and say the babies might not even exist!"
"Sorry? Look, I've spent the last year being heavily delusional. I literally spent all my time pretending to be other people. The only time I acknowledged that the babies might not be real was when the town was asleep and all that was conscious was smoke. I didn't tell you it was a possibility because I refused to acknowledge it was one unless I was forced to." Greg shrugged helplessly.
"I dunno… that seems like a cop out to me." Victor commented.
Greg rolled his eyes. "Look, if you'd just let me get on with this, we could actually figure out whether the baby is real or not, and you can all react appropriately then, alright?"
"Wait!" Tessa exclaimed. "Wouldn't- don't you think it might be bad for the baby?" She asked hesitantly. "What if you skip an important part of the birthing process?!? Like the baby doesn't get the trigger that tells them they need to start breathing or something!"
Greg paused. "They do cesareans, don't they? It's pretty much the same concept, isn't it?"
Tessa hesitated. "I-I guess?"
"Would it make you more comfortable if I did it piecemeal?" Greg offered. "Take the belly off, then deliver through the sack?"
Tessa hesitated a bit more, before letting out a groan. "No, just- be careful, alright?"
"Don't worry, I will." Greg nodded. He placed his hands underneath the Tessa copy's back, before slowly beginning to dissolve everything between his hands and the baby, gently bringing it closer until he held it, before turning the rest of her to smoke. A wail erupted from the baby as Greg quickly pulled it- her, to his chest, cradling her. Greg felt a tension burn in his chest as he looked down at her, fully expecting her to open her eyes and find himself staring up at him, when he froze. He wasn't crying. No part of him was crying! Which meant… "Oh, holy shit you're real!" Greg exclaimed, stunned. He then felt a warm, sticky substance on his arm. "And you've had your first poop! Good for you!"
Tessa froze as she processed Greg's exclamation. "We- we have a baby?" She asked numbly, the weight of that realization crashing down on her. She and Greg had a child together! They were parents! Essentially married! It felt so sudden, yet… warmth spread through her chest as she stepped next to Greg, looking down at their daughter. "We have a baby." She whispered softly, smiling brightly as tears came to her eye.
"We don't need to spank her, do we?" Greg asked.
Tessa glared at him. "If you even think of hitting our daughter, I swear I will figure out some way to end you!" She growled, grabbing the baby and taking her from him.
"Aw, she's adorable!" Casey cooed.
"I dunno… anything that wrinkly can't be more than a four at best." Victor commented with a smirk.
Tessa glared at him. "Greg, hurt him."
"Shit slap!" Greg announced, swinging his poopy arm at Victor.
"Ha!" Victor mocked as a barrier appeared in between them, before it popped and Greg's palm hit him square on the cheek. "Fuck!" He swore, rubbing his cheek, which only managed to smear the poop.
Greg burst out laughing, not having expected his attack to actually land. "Who popped that? Well done!"
"The moment I heard the words 'shit slap', I knew that hit needed to land." Debbie grinned victoriously.
"Don't call my baby ugly." Tessa added with a smirk.
Victor snorted, shaking his head, but grinning along with everyone else. "Hurting me doesn't make your kid any cuter."
"Victor, I'm warning you now, if you don't say our baby is cute, they'll never find your body." Casey raised a finger, giving him a threatening look.
"If he doesn't say my baby is cute in the next ten seconds, I'm taking his head and mounting it over my front door." Tessa growled, narrowing her eyes at him.
"You can silence me, but you can't silence the truth!" Victor exclaimed, before promptly disappearing.
"I know where you live!" Tessa yelled, startling the baby, causing her to start crying again. "Oh, no, shush, it's alright!" Tessa panicked, quickly attempting to sooth her. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Tessa repeated nervously. "What do you need!?! Do- do you need to eat? To sleep? To- shit!" She looked up at Greg. "We need a crib! We need diapers! We need formula! We need- we need everything! We didn't prepare for this at all! Why didn't we have all this ready!"
"Tessa, chill!" Greg attempted to calm her down, his smoke billowing, forming into a crib in the corner, a pile of clothes and diapers on the table, and a bottle of breastmilk in his hand. He also managed to clean the poop off his arm in the process. "I've got it all taken care of! See?" He assured her, handing her the bottle.
Tessa quickly snatched the bottle, about to place the nipple near the baby's mouth, before freezing as she stared at the nipple. "Greg, why is there an actual nipple on this bottle?!?"
"Uh… best of both worlds?" Greg shrugged. "Baby gets a real nipple and breast milk to succle on, while we don't have to deal with, you know, breastfeeding."
Tessa blinked at him, then at the bottle, before letting out a weary sigh. "Fuck it." She grumbled, turning her attention back to the baby. She carefully coaxed her with the nipple, rubbing it lightly against her lips until she latched on and started sucking. Tessa let out a sigh of relief. "Good. Good."
"There she goes." Greg smiled, putting an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close as he looked down at the baby. "We should probably figure out a name, huh?"
"You should call her Raisin!" Victor yelled as he appeared on the other end of the room, before immediately disappearing again.
"You're volunteering for a suicide mission!" Tessa growled.
"This entire war is a suicide mission!" Victor blinked back in to retort.
Tessa turned to Debbie. "The next time he appears, end him!"
"Yes, ma'am!" Debbie saluted, readying a spell in preparation for Victor's next appearance.
Tessa turned back to Greg. "Do you have any ideas?"
"Well, right now I can't get Raisin out of my head." Greg frowned.
"Ha- ah!" Victor popped in, yelping as Debbie hit him with a small spike of ice, before popping back out.
"Damn! I only winged him." Debbie cursed.
Greg chuckled, shaking his head. "Anyway, let me think…" *Raisin… Rain? Maybe? Hmmm… smoke baby… Smoky? Smog? Smaug! Wait, no, not a girl's name… Ash?* Greg paused. He actually kinda liked that one. "What do you think of Ash?" He asked Tessa.
Tessa blinked. "Ash? Like Ashley?"
"Well, my thought process was more along the lines of the stuff that goes along with smoke, but that works too." Greg shrugged.
Tessa scowled at him. "You're lucky that's actually a cute name, or I'd be stabbing you right now."
"What? I'm a smoke person! She's my smoke baby! Ash just makes sense! It's like hardened smoke!" Greg protested.
"Dude, you're already buried, stop digging." Casey leaned in to whisper to him.
Greg sighed. "Fine, fine! But it's a good name, right?"
Tessa smiled down at the baby. "Yeah, it's a good name. Little Ashley."
"Good, cause we should probably get her to bed and get to the walls." Greg commented. "The Technocracy is moving."
"What?!?" Tessa sputtered as everyone else exclaimed in surprise as well, including Victor, who appeared nearby, Debbie too shocked to do anything about it.
"Don't worry, they aren't moving quickly." Greg assured them. "They are coming though, so… we should go." A second Greg made out of smoke appeared, gesturing for Tessa to hand him the baby.
Tessa hesitated, her hold tightening slightly. "You'll keep her safe, right?"
"Tessa, the only way anyone will be able to even touch her is if they can instantly pierce through about ten feet of steel." Greg assured her in a serious tone.
Tessa bit her lip, before letting out a frustrated groan. She had to go prepare her soldiers, and she knew that staying with the baby wouldn't actually help anything, but… Ash was her baby! She had to make sure she was safe! She knew it was irrational, but she couldn't bring herself to actually hand her over to Greg.
"Tessa… We have to go." Debbie placed a hand on her shoulder, giving her a soft, but insistent look.
"You know the best thing you can do is fight to keep her safe." Casey added, nodding along.
Tessa took a deep breath, before nodding, carefully handing Ash over to Greg. "I'll be back soon." She muttered softly, caressing the baby's head. "I won't let anything happen to you."
"She pooped on my arm again." Greg commented.
Tessa suppressed a smirk, closing her eyes and turning her head slightly. "Greg, I'm trying to have a serious moment with my daughter!" She attempted to hiss, unable to keep the amusement out of her voice.
"What? She's the one who pooped!" Greg protested.
"She's a baby!" Tessa retorted.
"She's a poopy baby." Greg grumbled.
Tessa smiled, shaking her head. "Okay, I have to go. Take care of her! I'll be back soon."
Greg smiled back. "I'm sure you will. Don't worry, I'll keep her safe."
"I know you will." Tessa sighed, lingering for a few more moments, before forcing herself to turn and head towards the walls, followed by the rest. It was time to go to war.
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