《Serenity's Children》Chapter 18 - Faux Hope
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"Vatgrown"
This was the collective term used for all genetically-cultured mammalian humanoids which usually hail from the Empire.
They consist of a wide range of species, from the terrestrial Felisa and Caenia, to the flight-capable Avea. These also included amphibious species like the Balaenoa and Elasmoa.
But the most popular of them all were the Vulpina, as their well-mapped genetic base allowed for the highest number of viable modifications during embryogenesis.
The process starts with chromosome alterations of the donor egg and supermarket cells. Then 50 to 90 days after fertilization, for the equivalent of a human baby to form.
However, they are almost always left within their growing vats until they reach adulthood or some stage in between.
Ariel was one such case. Once she was released from the vat, she was immediately outfitted with a stimulation and life support apparatus, before being slid into a Learning Pod.
During the next nine days, her muscles were developed and the desired memories were conditioned into her. These came in waves, as videos, pictures and voice recordings, so that in her perspective, she was present in all of them. The difficulty that came with the process of data gathering, is why some memory profiles have become standard additions, and Ariel certainly had those as well.
However, the true value of the Vatgrown was never in what they were given. But in their capacity to learn, improve and adapt, all to fuel their innate desire to satisfy their masters in every way that they could.
Of course, there were no exceptions.
With the last of the water they managed to find now gone down her throat, an exhausted Ariel gasped and heaved. She then tossed the empty bottle away and leaned back against a café counter, with her legs splayed out, sore and even worse, wounded.
There were tiny pieces of dark chitin lodged into the soles of her feet. Although, thankfully, she wasn't bleeding profusely.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Guila asked, unsure of her own expression as she knelt next to Ariel's legs, while carrying pieces of torn up curtain and hand towels on a wide metal tray. "You should've told me."
"I…!!" A flash of what could've been anger appeared on Ariel's expression, but no further answer came.
"..." Of course Guila noticed that minute change. But she had no idea what to say, so she just looked away to tend to Ariel's wounds.
'The last thing I would've wanted was for you to feel pressured to carry me.' In her head, she reasoned.
When Guila pinched one of the chitin pieces, Ariel hissed. Then she groaned between gritted teeth when it was pulled out and the bleeding worsened.
"Just a few more, okay?"
Guila couldn't possibly know what Ariel was thinking but she had an idea. Regret. Ariel must be regretting what she did. If she were in her shoes, she would too. However, Ariel didn't want to voice it. Because her Mistress was the reason behind her actions.
"...nhrk!!"
With every pinch and every pull, relief washed over Ariel and her reactions weakened. Until the last piece was dropped onto the floor. Then she patted the gunk and blood away with a towel, giving both feet a rough cleaning.
But they weren't done yet.
Guila held both of Ariel's calves close to her waist and reached for the gel sanitizer on the counter with pursed lips and brows, before kneeling back down.
"We don't have alcohol. So, I'll have to smear this on your feet. Otherwise, you'll get sick. But it's going to sting." After hearing that, Ariel stared at where she thought Guila was with terrified eyes, but she nodded anyway.
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"Here, bite down." Guila said as she pushed the thick shirt piece - turned mask - into Ariel's mouth. "Try not to scream, okay?"
She nodded, but there's no way that was ever going to happen. When Guila's gel covered hand pressed against Ariel's sole, she screamed like she was being murdered. But Guila didn't stop there. She pressed even harder, trying to push as much gel into her wounds.
"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGG!!!!"
The piece of cloth did its best, but Ariel had never felt this sort of searing pain. Being wounded was one thing, but this-! No matter how much she understood that they had to stay as quiet as possible, she couldn't help it.
Guila did her best to help muffle her voice too, by using her own mask as a second gag. Though, it still wasn't enough. But nevertheless, it was soon over and Guila used a hand towel to wipe both of Ariel's feet clean.
Then, she used the curtain pieces as bandages, as well as some sort of rudimentary footwear. When that was finally done, she gently lowered both legs off her thighs and placed them on the floor.
After all, it was these legs, smaller than her own, which managed to get them this far. Then, she stood up and checked outside.
No insects. Not on the brick road, on the other buildings, not a single one in sight. The same thing was true inside the cafe. The only sign of their presence was the stench that wafted in from the way they came.
Most likely, everyone in this area was unharmed by the initial collapse and moved to the Main Square. Since there was no food or targets here, none of the insects were present either.
However, Ariel probably had a much clearer picture than her, despite being unable to see. But little did Guila know what she actually focused her hearing on.
"Mistress…" She thought to call out, while staring at where the only other source of breathing was. But, she held herself back.
She didn't know if Guila was looking at her, but Ariel hoped with all her heart, that she wasn't. Because right now, her mind kept reminding her of what she had nearly done.
It was only right, of course. Given the crime she was so close to committing.
But why?! Why should she think of doing something so evil, to someone she loved with all of her heart? Was she defective? Did that make her unworthy, to chase after her Mistress and Master? Even if she was, why would she leave her behind, when Ariel needed her more than ever before?!
Then these swirling thoughts, through which she ground her teeth, were cut short.
"... You've been calling me Mistress, again." Guila’s words were somber. "I guess, my name doesn't roll off the tongue that well, huh?"
The same ears that allowed her to notice Guila’s attempts at deception before, now once again, showed Ariel the sadness and desperation that she felt - the genuine emotions that could only be portrayed through the subtleties in one's voice.
"Mistress…" She whispered back. To which Guila immediately turned around to look, only to see Ariel staring down at herself with seemingly lifeless eyes.
"... do you really need me?"
"?!"
Guila was taken aback by the sudden question, but rather than answer immediately, her thoughts returned to the words she told Ariel little more than an hour ago. Then came the fear of what would come next.
Ariel took her shocked silence differently, however. Since there was no doubt in her mind that her Mistress already knew what she was about to say. After all, she understood nothing about love, until Guila told her the truth.
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"Because I learned something… earlier, I told you that I loved you and Master. But… I don't."
She spoke slowly and quietly, while so visibly disheartened. But just like before, when Ariel first laid her heart out, Guila couldn't speak. She wasn't allowed to. She had to listen and accept whatever came her way.
"... Before we started acting like friends, you told me that to be loved, I should be needed first." Then, Ariel began to sob. But no tears accompanied dry heaving. "That's why… I was so happy when you told me not to give up. Because, even if you never said it, you admitted that you needed me, too."
'Acting'. Ariel was capable of playing a part, and Guila completely fell for the performance. That one word alone, nearly made her buckle. But clearly, this wasn't over yet.
"I thought, that was my chance to make you love me back. I felt like I could do anything. Even though I was so scared, I was able to act strong, walking ahead, carrying the weapon, and, and... just like Master in the memories I was given. Someone that you could fully rely on…!"
"But…" Her heaving got louder, and maybe that was when she finally noticed it herself. Because she covered her mouth with both hands and waited until it passed, before she continued. "I'm so sorry, Mistress…"
"Ariel…" Guila gasped out, with trembling hands and lips. She knew that she wouldn't want to hear what came next. But the words left her lips, regardless.
"What are you talking about…?"
"I wanted to drop you, Mistress." Ariel paused, surprised by how easily the words left her lips. But the sound of Guila limping closer, relit her conviction to keep talking.
"Y-you were so heavy and it hurt so much to run." Conversely to Guila who goes silent when confronted, Ariel grew bolder with every step. "I was so afraid I'd die because I had to keep carrying you."
"That's why I didn't tell you about my feet! Because I had to atone for-" Even though she heard it coming, Ariel still couldn't prepare herself for what came next.
When the empty water bottles they'd left on the floor were knocked out of the way, she thought she'd get slapped. Abused just like before all this happened, for being the wretch that she must've always been.
Instead, Guila just loomed over her.
Though she could not see, Ariel did not have a hard time imagining Guila’s expression. Anger. Hatred. Maybe even tears, if her Mistress still had some left to cry.
"I… that's why..” Just as quickly as it came, her fervor evaporated. Along with whatever conviction gave her the strength to be defiant and even dare to speak out. “... I'm not worthy to…"
As Guila knelt down and the rustle of thick clothing neared her, so too did Ariel near her limits. She raised her hands to her chest in some ill-thought of defense. But she couldn’t even bring them up to protect her face.
When she realized the pointlessness of her attempt, Ariel shut her eyes and turned away, terrified of the palm that she just knew was coming.
Then Ariel felt Guila's arms wrap around her neck.
"Eh…?"
She was being hugged.
However, there was no relief to be had, as the grip tightened and Guila's shoulder pushed up against her chin, forcing her to stretch her neck and face directly upward.
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry, Ariel." Seemingly, oblivious to the discomfort and pain she was causing, Guila whispered, her voice cracked and crying.
Regret? Anger towards herself? Thanks to all those self-serving emotions and ideas, Guila deluded herself into thinking that she'd begun to rebuild their relationship. She believed that, despite not even taking the time to truly understand the grave harm she'd done to the young girl's heart.
"I'm sorry. I was jealous and defensive, but you're right." She paused, trying to figure out the best words to say. "... you don't love us. Because, you were made to think that way."
"But wanting to drop me wasn't really a bad thing." Guila knew that she was clumsy. That, like how Ariel tried to copy her husband, she could never emulate her mother, who always knew what to say to console her.
Because her mother never needed to ask for her forgiveness.
However, Guila did.
"Loving someone doesn't mean never having thoughts that go against that love. I got angry at my-" She pursed her lips, then continued when the moment passed. "I…There's no need to punish yourself for it, okay? It's normal."
As unqualified as she was, she finally understood that taking up her mother's mantle was the first step to actually building their relations. To be one to raise Ariel.
But the second and more important step was to tell her directly.
"You don't have to act when around me anymore, understand? You can be scared. You can be angry and complain. You can be selfish. But most of all, you can stop worrying about being thrown away. Even if you don't love us, me and your Master… we do. And we'll care for you, in every way that we can. So that you can learn to love us back."
"... really?"
Despite the struggle to speak and even breathe in this position, the emotional levity she felt from Guila’s words was enough to let her ignore the physical pain.
"Yes, really. We're a team now. No more Mistress or anything. I promise you."
"I… I was going to…"
"But you didn't. I didnt even notice what you were about to do. So, I don't mind it at all."
It took a while for Ariel to realize her own tears finally running down her cheeks. But when she finally did, she wailed against the side of Guila’s head. Even though she knew that what she wanted most to hear, would never leave her Mistress’ lips.
Neither of them could have possibly known it at this time, but Ariel had been freed. She was free to finally start choosing for herself. Even more unknown were the choices she'd make.
When the tears finally stopped, they smiled while in each other's arms. No more delusions. No more forced-upon responsibilities. Just blank slates with which they could write anew. Starting now, all the joys they’d share and pains they’ll give one another, will be what’s carved into those slates.
"I don't want to carry you ever again, Mistress… I mean, Guila."
"I don't want that either. That was the first time my lower back has hurt ever since it was changed, you know?"
Even while whispering beneath the backdrop of distant chittering and deathly stillness, the atmosphere between them was lighter than it had ever been before. They walked out of the cafe's smashed front door, hand in hand - neither noticing any danger.
Then came a distant ping, a dull bang, and strong flashes of light in the distance. Not a second later, came the deafening buzz of thick and black clouds as they rose into the sky and converged towards the source.
Those in the Kyrsana Opera House had made their move.
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