Private vehicles were not very common in Livia. Not only were there not enough space at individual homes to park, but the roads and infrastructure themselves were tiny and in tight demand. Bussing, taxiing, subway or light rail were the prevalent modes of transportation for the average citizen.

Mayumi and Cecilia were glued together standing in a crowded bus, one hand on a hanging handle above, the other hand around the other’s waist. The air smelled of gasoline and sweat, and their duffel bags hung in front of them to ward off pickpockets. The weather was not yet cold enough to turn on any space heating, nor would a packed bus have a need to in the first place. Some of the windows were even open.

“Hey, Celia, are you all right now?”

“Yeah, just about.”

Mayumi gently patted her on the back. It was way after rehearsals finished and school had closed, and because of that, they were on their way back to their district—Prince Edward—to grab dinner together. While Cecilia would get an earful from her father once she returned home, it wasn’t a problem if Mayumi showed up. For some reason, her father disdained interacting with her friends and classmates, and he generally left her to her own devices anyway.

“Anne was really troublesome, wasn’t she? She really needs to keep a lid on her anger. She’ll lose all of her eyebrows young at this rate.”

“That’s a lot of eyebrow to lose.”

“She slapped you at the end! It’s like she thinks she’s hot shit and can get away with going overboard, but in the end she’s just jealous of you. You’re Donovan’s favourite, not Anne.”

Cecilia gave a helpless smile, knowing Mayumi was ranting to make her feel good, though that remark about Donovan didn’t help.

“And don’t get me started on Liam. He literally just wants an excuse to not do the work he’s responsible for. He’s a real scumbag.”

They got off the bus at the same stop in the middle of Prince Edward district. Needless to say, there were too many people and too many high-rises in a sea of brick, mortar, glass and steel. Restaurants of all kinds lined the street-sides, and they reached for their usual go-to as they passed through the gap in the metal barrier between the road and the sidewalk.

The restaurant was by no means high-end, but it wasn’t pitifully low-end either. Customers had their own booths, and it wasn’t as busy as other establishments; perfect for people on the go like these two. They could get their business done within half an hour. It served the usual Yue style cuisine so ubiquitous in Livia and neighbouring Lien, but terrifyingly scarce just beyond the city limits.

“Pork chops in corn sauce with spaghetti, cold lemon tea, no sugar.”

“Minced meat in tomato sauce with fried rice, hot honey lemon.”

Frighteningly, Mayumi always picked corn sauce to go with pork chops when there were more suitable options like gravy and black pepper. Corn sauce usually went with deep-fried fish fillet.

“What’s wrong, Celia? You’re still feelin’ down about Liam and Anne?”

“No, no, no. It’s not about them, really…”

“So you’re still feeling down about something, huh?”

“Ugh…”

It was hard to avoid a person as perceptive and as cheating as Mayumi, with her personality and clairvoyance respectively. Fortunately, Cecilia didn’t take it as a demerit, and in fact it made it more convenient than a nuisance—though it was likely only because Mayumi wanted to genuinely be friends with Cecilia, and would only push her buttons at the appropriate times. If it wasn’t the case, she would have felt an immense and overbearing pressure from the all-seeing eye.

“How are you able to recover from that so…brilliantly?”

“Recover?”

“Not just that. For you to be able to take action in the first place is super impressive already.”

“Take action?”

Mayumi gave her a questioning look as Cecilia asked quietly, inaudible in the noisy restaurant if they weren’t seated in their own booth. Cecilia rested her chin in her hands with her elbows on the table as she lost herself in Mayumi’s curious expression and her own thoughts.

“Well, y’know, for you to come back after seven years solely to confess to a love you’ve held for just as long, you don’t seem as devastated as I imagined. If I was in your position, I would’ve holed up somewhere for a few weeks before being able to see anyone at school again. You’re so clean, Mayumi.”

Hearing such frank characterization from an outsider, Mayumi couldn’t help but give a self-deprecating laugh.

“Heh, what was that? ‘Clean’? You sound like you’re ten years older than me.”

“Shut up. I’ve always been on the older side of things.”

Cecilia pouted for a moment, but instantly returned to her deep thoughts and continued.

“What makes you strong? Strong enough to both start and end it all?”

“Hmm, how should I say this? I appreciate the sentiment, but I only seem strong because I was given a shove. Remember, it was Mira who asked me to return in the first place. If I was never reminded of it, I would never have returned to Korolev.”

“But you wanted to do it, right? You only ever do things you want, and that’s why you never half-ass anything. I can’t be like you in that way.”

“Haha, do I look that amazing? I’m flattered.”

Mayumi’s cheeks tickled pink at the praise, and in it Cecilia saw why people’s blindspots were always themselves. It didn’t surprise her, but it did make her feel—not exactly belittled, but—even more beneath Mayumi as a person, and more importantly, as a girl. Mayumi was the kind of girl Cecilia always wanted to become. For real, if she was in Kato’s position, she would’ve taken this humble and kind-hearted girl for herself in a heartbeat.

“I don’t have the confidence in myself to commit to anything. It makes everything I do half-assed, and I end up causing problems for everyone, like with Anne and Liam.”

“…I’m sorry, Celia, but I think you’re giving me a little too much credit. I’m not as strong as you think I am.”

“If not, then you’re at least stronger than me plenty. That, you have sufficient credit for.”

Mayumi smiled gently, mirroring Cecilia’s pose.

“It’s not a competition. It’s all relative, y’know? I may seem strong today, but that’s because you didn’t see me when I wasn’t strong.

“Remember what had brought this all on? My half-assed commitment to Caius’s feelings. If I had the guts to tell him I don’t see him that way, then everything would’ve resolved itself. I might be together with Kato today, or I might have suffered a rejection just as terrible, and the Elites could’ve disbanded a long time ago.

“All I’m doing right now—as you say, not half-assing everything—is to absolve myself of the crimes I’ve committed. That’s why I’ll continue to love Kato, even if he’ll never love me again. If I let go of this feeling, I feel like I will lose myself and repeat these mistakes over and over, and I can’t be doing that, now, can I?”

“…”

“I’m doing this…to remain who I am. To remain true to myself. That’s why I did whatever I could to get Kato to be true to me, to seek and accept his and the Elites’ judgment for my sins.”

“Is that why you’ve strung everyone along with you for the ride?”

“Well, of course. I did say I have unfinished business with the Elites. All of them.”

“Are they finished, yet?”

“I don’t know. I may have sounded like a condescending preacher just now, but as you know, I’m avoiding Kato right now just to keep myself sane. Even if I don’t need to hole myself up, I’m just as every bit a coward as anybody else. Does that seem strong to you, Celia?”

Mayumi’s smile faded as her eye fell, and Cecilia felt a wave of guilt wash over her as she realized that she had misunderstood Mayumi. Her front was her way of coping with her inner turmoil, and Cecilia had mistaken it for strength because it was the opposite of her own way of dealing with her cowardice. She firmly grabbed Mayumi’s hands with her own.

“I’m sorry I didn’t realize sooner. I didn’t mean to make you talk about things that were difficult for you, Mayumi.”

“No, I don’t mind it, Celia. I’ll need to talk about it at some point and articulate it to myself, or else I’ll explode. I should be thanking you.”

“Kato doesn’t deserve a wholesome soul like yours. Can I be your husband, Mayumi?”

Cecilia brought Mayumi’s hands to her own face, cuddling it softly. Mayumi giggled.

“Now that’s not the first time I’ve heard that from a girl.”

Mayumi caressed Cecilia’s face in return, brushing away the loose hair strands that so often fell over the front.

“So don’t beat yourself up over things like with the autolights, or with the kid you stood up for in first year. There’re plenty of unfairness and injustices in the world, but only one of you, so take care of yourself. And if that’s the kind of person you are and strive to be, then don’t doubt yourself and go for it. You might have to suffer the consequences of those actions, but I’d take those any day if the only alternative was to lose yourself.”

Cecilia’s eyes widened. She could hear echoes of Stephen’s words in Mayumi’s.

“That’s why you’re so obsessed with Auxirian Idiot in the first place, right? In essence, Tommy’s finding a purpose for himself and his existence, but at the end of his journey he wound up back where he started: in his hometown. He couldn’t throw himself away, as much as he tried to in the underbelly. He returned, battered and ruined, but in a way better headspace compared to when he initially left Sunnyville. He found out who he was, and decided it was worth sticking to himself, than to pretend to be someone he isn’t. What about you, Celia?”

She was stunned. She still couldn’t believe how succinct Mayumi was with her words, and people thought Cecilia’s demeanour was already mature beyond her years. She could feel the full weight of Mayumi’s past in her simple question; carrying with it the pain and struggles of a typical edgy teenager like Cecilia herself—a pain that Mayumi had endured and came to her own answer for.

“…I don’t know yet. But thanks to you, I want to make it somewhere now. I can’t be running away from it forever.”

Mayumi grinned. She could see light returning to Cecilia’s gloomy eyes and it warmed her heart. If her experiences helped anybody just a little bit, then it gave meaning to her taking the long, beaten path down life.

“Sounds like a plan.”

The students in the music room were stunned. At the back of it were several desks pulled in from the neighbouring classroom to make a well-formed row for the judges of the talent show’s auditioning panel to sit at, and they were taken aback, even disgusted, by the unexpectedly splendid performance that had just unfolded before them.

“How was that possible?”

The usual sea of chairs and music stands were put aside to one wall to make space for the auditioning hopefuls in the centre, where many, many have fallen to the wayside under the tense and often unreasonable scrutiny of the panel. Mona was one such extreme judge, but her five other protégés were no slouches either. They were determined to make the talent show a success, so they held no quarter for sloppy or repeated performances.

Case in point, usually only one or two students were truly capable of speed painting or mural work, so these types of performances were easy to provision. However, other types of performances, like the display of a band, had many more applicants and it was a fierce competition to choose the single one that would occupy that area of talent showing. No self-respecting talent show would display the same talents more than once, so there was no room for discussion. Even a star-studded group of students could be culled, if they were only second-best in their talents that year.

However, the music students of Class B eventually—almost last minute in fact—decided to not participate in the talent show this year, allowing the talent show to squeeze in an extra musical performance. Usually, the music, drama, and art departments were provisioned their own time slots separate from the plebeians, so the panel allowed another performance from the general student body of the same type as the ones that these departments decided to make. With the music department taking a break, someone else had to replace them.

And so the five Elites in the spotlight, Kato, Alice, Eon, Yui and Franco, had a much better chance to get themselves into the talent show. The two stars of Class F were in front on guitar, the silent one on bass, the half on support and percussion, and the idiot on drums. And they made an impressionable performance in front of the Mona faction’s elites and the Class B jury who were lined up on the side.

“I can’t believe this…”

Because of the presence of the Class B jury, there was no way the AC could deny, neither genuinely nor with ulterior motivation, that this was more than qualified to replace the music department’s ticket in the talent show. Their band leader and coincidentally the student council treasurer piped up immediately.

“Mona, I believe they can perform just as great as, if not better than, us in the talent show. You don’t have any complaints about this level of play, do you?”

“No. If Madam Chancellor says so, then I have no complaints. And even to amateur ears like mine, this is already way more than what’s expected of high school students.”

Mona was, while unsurprised, still infuriated with the fact that Kato was able to pull this off. Her face twitched with indignation, emotionally unable to accept that someone she hated had definitively made the cut.

“I want to add that the drums need some work, but it’ll already be nitpicking at this point. There’s no problem with this performance.”

While Bianca gave a little jab at Franco, whose head drooped in reply, what she didn’t explicitly state was even more amazing, and because of how amazing it was she didn’t want to aggravate Mona’s already agitated state further.

Alice was a straight-A’s student through and through, and was a bona fide student of music on top of that, so to say her skills were unparalleled would be understating it. Bianca herself considered Alice to be her peer, and Bianca was considered Korolev Senior’s second-most talented music student behind Mirabelle.

Kato was a technical genius to start with because of his physical superiority and his herculean training to become a Heart, so it was a cinch for him to learn all of Alice’s techniques when it came to playing the actual instruments. His physicality simply didn’t allow him to play the wrong notes, tempo, or dynamics.

Eon, while never been a music student, was a straight-A’s student like Alice, and had the natural talent to pick up new things easily. It wouldn’t immediately reward him, but in time he could become an expert at the craft of his choosing.

Without Caius on keyboard, Yui had to at least fill in on supporting the crew with backing tracks and percussions like xylophones and triangles, which Caius would have been in charge of.

And finally, Franco had the same crazy level of physical superiority as Kato to lean on as a crutch to get the technical abilities on par with his to-be peers. He didn’t have any particular talent towards music, and he lived a normal, average life without a draconian martial arts training regimen to sharpen his technicals, but it was still more than enough to get a passing grade.

“So? Is it decided? I’m gonna leave.”

Eon said frankly as he packed his bass up and into its case, and handed it over to Alice in front of him. Wasting no time, he immediately picked up his school bag and slung it over himself as he marched towards the classroom door without a word or glance back at his friends. You could say he stormed off silently.

Alice didn’t even flinch at Eon’s cold attitude as it was the case for some time now, while the panel and jury were too busy with themselves to pay attention to the slammed door. As annoying as Eon’s attitude was, there was no going around this issue. The three of them were the original Elites, so it was natural for Eon to side with Mayumi—though it was more than just age-old brotherhood that motivated Eon, nor was he entirely on the other side.

“Sorry, Alice. I’m going to go after him for a bit.”

“Sure.”

In a similar fashion, he left his guitar in Alice’s care as well, who was at a loss as to what she should do in this cold war. She stood firmly on Kato’s side as she was closest to him, and it was painful to watch Kato’s desperation like this with no method of intervention.

“Observing, my ass. Eon clearly has some stake in this debacle.”

Remembering their conversation some time ago, Eon never actually said he would observe, and only observe. On the other hand, he truly didn’t have any skin in the game, and he didn’t know what he could do to salvage the situation even if he had any. His remarks were more of a description of what happened the previous time, than what Eon wanted to do.

While Alice was frustrated at her powerlessness and Eon’s pompous attitude, she was glad that this time around he was able to find what he could do other than just observe. It was part of why he was staying on with them to play in the talent show despite the rift between them and Kato—after all, it was only after Kato’s pleading that Eon agreed to help out on his plan. In other words, Eon thought it had a chance to work.

“Eon!”

They were already at their lockers by the time Kato was able to catch up to him. It was technically after school, but only classes had finished; clubs were still ongoing, which meant that there were still some students loitering in the atrium.

“Eon, you’ll get them to do it, right? Get them both to watch us in the talent show.”

A little out of breath because Kato rushed over without thinking, he stopped and clutched a locker handle next to him. Eon was already dumping his belongings into his locker, and was almost ready to depart for the auditorium.

“Well, yes, of course. That’s what I agreed to, right? I’m playing in the band to give them a reason to.”

The eyes behind his polarized glasses were strained and red, almost as if he had been tearing up just now, but of course the glasses obscured it from Kato and all he could make out was that he had a pained look on his face.

“Thank you for putting up with me, Eon. Truly. I don’t know what I’d do without you to—”

Then, Eon instantly slammed Kato against the locker and held him by the lapels. His victim was shocked, more at Eon’s reaction than the physical entanglement.

“Don’t you fucking say anything here, Kato. Wait until you’ve done all that you could, before preaching to me how grateful you are of me. I don’t deserve any of it, and you don’t need to preach.”

Kato remained silent, just as he was asked to. He watched Eon let go of his grip and slowly take off his glasses, revealing a pair of rainbow-coloured eyes that were swelled from crying, and bloodshot from fatigue and a lack of sleep.

“Seriously. You needa chill on that goodie-two-shoes act of yours, even though I know these are your true feelings. It hurts us, but not in the way it normally goes. It hurts us, because we’re not as good as you at it by a long shot. We’re terrible friends.”

Eon confessed miserably. He looked down at their feet and continued quietly under his breath.

“It hurts us because we don’t deserve your friendship, a friend as loyal as you. We hate ourselves for not being able to meet your expectations, and we hate you for choosing us to be your friends. We can’t bring ourselves to meet you eye to eye because you’re so high above us, and we can’t bring ourselves to forgive you for our own selfish reasons, even though you’ve done nothing objectively wrong. This is all so fucked up. So fucked up. How can you be so loyal to us, Kato? Why are you such a good friend? The best estranged friend?”

Right at his last utterance, a reference to the song they just played together, Kato somehow knew what happened earlier. Eon had cried in relief when Mona passed their audition.

“How could you be like this? With Caius and Mayumi here and now, and the same seven years ago? How could you still be…?”

Eon clumsily wiped the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand. He was an emotional guy, but he was never teary. He backed off from Kato, leaning on the opposite locker in a dejected slump.

“…the same faithful friend that you are, back when it was about me and Bia?”

The penny dropped for Kato. He now understood why Eon snapped at him with such a raw outburst. He clenched his fists to wear down on the restlessness in his throat that compelled him to speak out. There was no further discussion to be had here. He would hear it out after everything was over.

Eon went back to his locker to close and lock it shut before he marched brusquely in the opposite direction from where they came, towards the auditorium, leaving Kato behind in a daze. He slipped down to the floor, running his fingers through his hair in distress. He desperately hoped that his plan would work out, or else he wouldn’t know how to face Caius, Mayumi, or even Eon ever again.

“So that’s what this is about, huh, Madam Chancellor? I didn’t know Eon carried a torch for you.”

“Yeah, he did.”

Bianca said curtly, to which Mona next to her spared only a fleeting glance before taking her leave, peeling herself away from their snooping from behind a concrete pillar. Mona was about to sink another bite into her nominal adversary, but thought better than to get involved at this stage of the game. Curiously, she was somewhat interested in their situation, both personally and pragmatically, because of Mirabelle’s presence in all of this, so she decided to remain a silent bystander for now.

“Wait. Does it have anything to do with what happened back when you…?”

Alice trailed off, unsure of how to put into words to refer that particular incident she had not seen nor was a part of, but nonetheless Bianca nodded sombrely at the Rinian girl who also joined their peeping squad. The rest of the Elites remained in the music room to pack up.

“Are you going to do anything about it?”

“Do anything? I haven’t done anything about it for years now. Well, I’m looking out for myself, just like Mayumi is. In that vein, I’m also as terrible a friend as what Eon had described.”

Bianca gave a wry smile and began to leave as Mona had, and Alice followed suit. There was no reason for Alice to remain either, as she felt Kato was indescribably unapproachable at the moment. Right now, he was a Kato that she knew of only through stories told by him and his peers; not the one he presented to her of his own volition. Strangely, she didn’t want to truly get to know it because it would presuppose that she fucked up somewhere along the line, too.

“Is Eon really going to help us out?”

“Of course, he is. He’s got a reason to. You only know the grade nine story from Kato’s perspective, right? And only the end of the story, too. A lot happened before that, and Eon was way more than just loosely involved, as much as he tries to make himself out to be. From Kato’s perspective it makes sense, as he saw them as two separate, though sequential, incidents, and for the record, I did as well. But to some others involved, they might not see it that way.”

“What? What happened?”

Aghast, Alice pressed for an answer, but to no avail.

“That’s a story for Eon to tell, not me.”

“Haaaaaah? That’s not fair, Bianca! Now I want to know more! Tell me!”

“Ahahaha! Don’t worry about it. It’s just an old war story at this point, and there’s actually very little in it on anyone still here with us, except Eon. It’s really all about him, so if you wanna know, you’ve got to ask him. It’s really for him to tell from start to finish.”

“You make it sound really trivial, and you know that, weirdly, the more trivial something is, the less inclined he’ll be with telling you about it. As an irascible person myself, that idiotic part of him is quite irascible, I daresay.”

They both laughed as they locked arms, striding across the atrium towards the music room once more. Somehow they had become a little closer despite their conflicting positions, and Alice wondered if this was the average Tuesday for the Elites. Living, breathing, and walking together, yet full of contradictions and differences. Alice wanted to understand, so she held Bianca’s hand snugly, affirming her desire to be a part of them.

On the receiving end of Alice’s feelings, Bianca welcomed it warmly. Perhaps she was open to her because of her earnest sincerity, a feeling that infinitely reminded her of Kato. At the same time, even though Alice was slated to become a nomenklatura who would retain her memories of Kato, Bianca didn’t mind that Alice was particularly fond of him, as many others also had and failed, including herself. That lowbrow, ugly perspective probably made her a terrible friend, but she was also past being crushed under that ugliness. She already had regrets and suffered the consequences, and she was determined to continue to bear them, old and new.

That was why she insisted on maintaining the status quo; in exchange for her own continued internal strife, she could grasp the arm Alice had extended to her, instead of being separated from each other like Mayumi. Funnily enough, it amused her that even though their approaches were complete opposites, neither her nor Mayumi’s rewarded them with what they wanted. It might be an act of fate that the two of them were chosen for these roles, because she was wholly aware that the main heroine’s challenge had yet to come.