I didn’t get a chance to finish my conversation with Vaozey since Koyl came over and started bothering us to join in on the group's dice game. Once everyone was supposed to be asleep, I was still thinking about the information I had uncovered. I could hear Vaozey, still awake, talking to herself some ten meters away in her own sleeping spot, but I couldn’t make out the words. I knew she was awake though, because instead of spurts of verbalization she was talking in complete sentences to herself.

The next day I found that I had hit barriers with both electric magic and translating the high priest’s document. I couldn't get electric current to work, and trying to analyze the document through word frequency was difficult in a language with so few particle words like Uwrish. Instead of trying to force progress, I picked up a few pebbles and began testing out a different technique that had been floating in the back of my head. That yihzhae managed to launch those glass shards at extremely high speed, I thought, still feeling some residual itching in my legs, there shouldn’t be any reason I can’t do the same.

Sadly, after two hours of trying, I couldn’t throw the rocks much harder than I could have with my hands. Aiming was easier, but besides that advantage, it appeared that I had some kind of maximum speed limit on my magic. This could be something wrong with the visualization, I thought initially, but not one of my following alterations affected the result much. Mentally, it felt almost like the rocks were slipping out of my grasp mid-motion. There were a few possibilities for what was happening, none of them things I could easily solve, so I put the task aside.

At mid-day, the guards switched around positions and Vaozey came out of the front wagon wearing her breastplate and head chainmail. After exchanging a few words with Zhervaol, she took up the rear guard spot, reinforcing Aedey and Yaayowjh. Koyl and I walked out front, and since everything looked peaceful, small talk began quickly.

“My head feels like someone is stepping on it,” Koyl groaned. He took out some of his medication and snorted it, then shook his head a few times. “At least the znahdeyvtih takes the edge off.”

“It doesn’t seem as effective as it used to be,” I remarked. “Your tolerance is still quite high. How much do you have left?”

“Enough to make it home and sleep soundly,” Koyl sighed. “We’re so close now, I just need to hold on.” We both turned our heads to watch a flock of birds coasting across the sky, squawking at each other. If I had a gun, I could shoot one of those down for food, I thought. “So what were you talking to Vaozey about last night?” Koyl asked.

“Actually, that was something I wanted to discuss with you,” I replied, and Koyl gave me a strange grin. Though it was deadened a bit from the drugs, I could tell he was trying to be mischievous.

“I suspected you had some strange tastes when you were so disinterested in Yehpweyl,” he joked. “Still, why are you asking me for advice? It’s not like I’d know how to gain the favor of someone like her.” I took a second to process what Koyl had said, then sighed and rolled my eyes as a display of minor annoyance.

“Imagine a cube,” I said. Koyl curled his lips in for a moment, rubbed the stubble on his face, then shrugged. I need a baseline for what these people can normally do, I thought, I can’t assume my abilities are average when there’s plenty of evidence to the contrary.

“Okay,” he shrugged, “I’m imagining a cube.”

“What color is it?” I asked.

“Uh, gray,” Koyl replied. “Like a rock, I’m imagining a cube of stone.”

“Rotate the cube in your head,” I instructed.

“What is this abo-” Koyl wanted to ask.

“Just do it, make it spin slowly,” I interrupted. Koyl eyed me suspiciously.

“Okay, it’s rotating,” he said. I noticed that his eyes didn’t seem to be locked onto any one point anymore, almost like he was no longer paying attention to what he was looking at.

“How is it rotating?” I asked. “What direction?”

“Like this,” Koyl said, gesturing an anticlockwise motion around a vertical axis with his finger.

“Now, make the top face yellow and the side faces alternate between blue and red,” I instructed. “Make the side faces have the numbers two, four, seven, and eleven on them as well.”

“While it’s moving?” Koyl complained.

“Yes,” I replied. Koyl’s brow furrowed, and his jaw tightened with concentration.

“Shit,” he swore, “that’s too much. What’s the point of this?”

“You can’t manage to visualize that much?” I asked, somewhat surprised. Visualization and spatial reasoning were part of my own virtual training, and the exercise I had been giving to Koyl was a rather low-level task. Then again, he couldn’t figure out the three-dimensional cube lines either, I thought.

“I can get the colors right, but then when I try to do the numbers it starts to break down,” Koyl said. “I know I’m imagining it, but I can’t see it clearly if that makes sense. The details only fill in if I stop it to look closely.”

“It does make sense,” I said quietly, going into my own light trance of thought.

“You still haven’t told me what this is all about,” Koyl said, nudging me with his elbow.

“Magic,” I replied. “When you try to light a fire, you do a similar visualization, correct?”

“Uhh,” Koyl mumbled, rubbing his chin. “Sort of, I guess? I try to get the spirits to make a fire by showing them what it should look like. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. I usually just try a lot of different images of fires.” So he’s imagining a full fire? I wondered. “Are you saying that you do something different?”

“I visualize an increase in heat at the point where I want ignition to happen,” I replied.

“How do you ‘visualize’ a feeling?” Koyl scoffed. “You’re not even joking, are you?”

“Not even a little bit,” I replied. So, as with force magic, his visualization is actually more complex than mine, but less flexible, I thought, Even though it has extraneous data, it still works. Maybe that data affects the efficiency? The important part is that the magic can figure out his intent even though it isn’t perfect. The difference in methodology is probably also why I can do things like reach inside objects, while these people have trouble doing so. The fact that I can do that implies that visual data isn’t the only measured component though, since I can reach inside things I can’t see inside of by extrapolating. I just can't sense anything when I do it.

The road suddenly curved down, and we had to begin descending a steep hill. The beasts, in the first noises of protest I had heard, squealed as their feet struggled to keep traction with the wagons behind them. I briefly wondered if I would have to jump out of the way, but Zhervaol and the driver steadied their animals skillfully, preventing an accidental skid.

“This was what you were talking to Vaozey about, isn’t it?” Koyl asked.

“It is,” I replied.

“Can she do the cube thing?” he asked expectantly.

“Let’s pay attention to the road,” I suggested. “We don’t want to slip and fall.”

That night, Koyl decided to turn in early because of his headache, which was still bothering him even after an entire day of walking. Anticipating another visit from Vaozey, I made a second fire further away from him so that I wouldn’t disturb his sleep. After eating a single lizard, I began working my way through my share of the fruit we had scavenged late in the afternoon. It’s amazing just how much food is available in the wild here, considering that only certain species are edible, I thought, maybe they were deliberately spread by humans.

“Spar with me,” Vaozey requested from behind me, her tone almost polite instead of combative. A practice fight is good to clear the mind, but I’d have preferred to spar with Koyl, I thought. With a sigh, I finished chewing the sweet fruit I had in my mouth and turned around to face her.

“I’ll just cheat again, you know,” I replied. Vaozey took off her sword and dropped it on the ground, then beckoned me with her hands.

“Just fists,” she said, “I’ll be able to tell if you cheat if it’s with fists. No weapons, no magic.”

“So you couldn’t tell before?” I asked sarcastically. Vaozey ignored me and began removing her armor and head wrapping, then her toga. She might have more muscle than that Hatchet Crew woman, Taaljheyz, did, I thought, It’s unusual, the average female here is lankier than the average male, but she's the opposite. I wonder if there are genetic factors, or if it's purely the result of training. With a sigh, I took off my gambeson and weapons, leaving them by the fire. “You should know, I’m better at hand-to-hand fighting than I am at sword fighting,” I said.

“Prove it,” Vaozey challenged with a half grin, and after a brief moment she began moving toward me. Her footwork was decent and she definitely had more skill with fists than the sword, but her lack of aggression indicated that she didn’t have the same level of confidence in hand-to-hand fighting as she did with weapons. She swung a right hook at me, and before it even had the chance to connect I bashed her cheek with a left jab, then ducked. I saw the bruise form and vanish while her fist flew over my head, and I also watched her left hand move out of position to preserve her balance.

“Wrong,” I said, slamming a right uppercut into her jaw and knocking her back. She tripped and nearly fell, swaying a bit, but managed to stay on her feet. “You shouldn’t move your other arm out when you use a punch like that. Instead, move it in and keep it against your face, or lock it in place in front of you to defend against counterstrikes.”

“Okay, maybe you're good at this,” Vaozey huffed, approaching again. Instead of letting her have the first blow, I threw a right jab, then a left jab, both of which were blocked by her raised hands. In response, Vaozey raised her leg and tried to kick me in the belly. Bad move, I thought, catching her foot with both hands and twisting, throwing her to the ground in a flash. “Seyt,” she swore as her ligaments popped back into place.

“You could have kept standing and allowed me to injure you,” I said. “You can heal quickly from damage, so ignoring the pain is safer since unarmed strikes are extremely unlikely to kill on their own.” For just a moment, Vaozey glared at me malevolently, but then she looked away and got back to her feet. A flurry of punches followed, most of which I blocked or bobbed out of the way of. The few that did hit me impacted my forehead, allowing me to angle my face downwards to neutralize the majority of their force, though their impacts were still heavy. “So, am I cheating?” I asked while Vaozey huffed, shifting around on her feet and trying to catch her breath.

“By having a head full of rocks,” she grunted. I shrugged, then went on the offensive. Instead of using minimal force in my jabs, I used more strength and aimed at places where I knew she would block them, conditioning her to expect more strikes. Then, when the opportunity presented itself, I grabbed her neck with both hands, stepped in, positioned a leg beside her, and threw her to the ground forcefully over it. Once again she found herself winded and coughing, while I stood over her.

“Normally I would grab clothing to do that,” I said. “The neck works well too, though there's a high chance of breaking it.” Vaozey snarled and scratched at my belly with her nails, peeling bits of skin off and drawing a small amount of blood. The injuries healed almost instantly, as usual, and she sighed as I stepped back.

“I can’t seytoydh beat you at anything, can I?” she muttered, pushing herself back to her feet. She wasn’t in a fighting stance, so I relaxed.

“I have training in this style of fighting,” I replied. “It would be better for you to use the sword, while I remain unarmed. We can do that if you want to, as long as you try not to cut anything off of me. It would be a good challenge on my end.” For some reason, my suggestion seemed to darken her mood.

“So weak I need a weapon to beat an unarmed man,” she grumbled, sitting down in the grass. “Plus, the man could use magic, but he’s choosing not to.” I wanted to pick my words carefully, so I thought about them while watching Vaozey alternate between sad and angry, occasionally smacking the ground with her fist half-heartedly. “I’m so jhaayjh useless,” she finally muttered. “I should have drowned in that tunnel.”

“How did you manage to survive that?” I asked. “I assumed you had died.”

“Got lucky,” Vaozey sighed. “After breaking just about every bone in my body, I smashed into the grate that blocks the northern overflow release tunnel just hard enough to snap part of it off. I was stuck, and since I didn’t want to drown if they dumped another reservoir I had to leave a bunch of my armor in order to get out. I lost a bunch bouncing around, too.”

“Then the guards spotted you and shot at you,” I continued.

“I was trying to get back to the northeast gate,” Vaozey explained. “The whole time, I thought I was going the right way, but somehow I guess I ended up running north in the dark. I couldn't see anything, and all I could hear was yelling and arrows hitting everything around me. Once again, I got lucky. Then I fell in a river and crawled out, and then I died laying on a rock.”

“That last part isn’t quite right,” I said.

“No, because luck saved me,” Vaozey seethed. “All I’ve ever had is luck, and it’s only good enough to keep me alive. I couldn’t even save one-” Vaozey choked mid-sentence, then growled. “I couldn’t even save one person,” she continued. “I lost my weapon and armor, got shot in the back like a coward, and I didn’t save anybody. All those years, all that effort, and I ran away instead of standing and fighting in the mess I made. I’m seytoydh useless. Not even the gods want me, so I can't even die with dignity.”

I sat down across from her, watching her body movements closely. I could see the emotions in the way that her shoulders were positioned, the way her face was being held, and how she was breathing. It’s a lot like Koyl, I noted, just a bit different. I wasn’t quite sure if I believed him at the time, but maybe they really are all like this. Vaozey finally looked up at me, then snorted and shook her head, breaking eye contact. She needs to be told the truth, I decided, The objective truth. This entire mindset she has is delusional, and I'm sure her frustrations are a result of it. I doubt I'm done with the Rehvites, and having an ally against them would be useful, just not one this unstable.

“You are weak,” I began, stating an obvious fact. “Not compared to the average human, but compared to an army you are pathetically weak. That is a fact that cannot change, regardless of what training you receive or skill you possess.”

“Thanks for the encouragement,” Vaozey replied sarcastically. “I’m barely stronger than the ‘average human’, you don’t have to lie to me. Most people don’t need a suit of armor to win street fights, especially not after five years of training. Was there a point to this, or are you just basking in your superiority?”

“I am not meaningfully stronger in the face of an army than you are,” I said. “Individuals aren’t capable of resisting overwhelming numbers. Tactics can help bridge the gap, but there is always an upper limit. It is not a personal failing to be unable to kill dozens of equal opponents at once in melee combat, let alone hundreds or thousands. No human can do that.”

“Yeah, coming from the guy that’s strong enough to kill a bear,” Vaozey sighed, looking at me. “Yes, Zhervaol mentioned that, and I'm fairly sure it's true. You're acting like you know what it's like to be like me. You don't, and you never will. For whatever reason, the gods blessed you with enough strength to rival an ihlzheyv, despite the fact that your soul is as hard as a stone. I doubt you've ever lost a fight in your life.” Only a few, I had to admit, but that doesn't affect the truth of what I'm saying.

“In terms of muscular strength, you are almost certainly in the top five percent of humans,” I said, using an English word. “That means if there were one hundred people here, only around four of them would be stronger than you on average, if magic is disallowed. Calling yourself weak is incorrect by any reasonable objective standard.”

“And you?” Vaozey retorted. “Where would you rate?”

“I would be the strongest in that room,” I replied, stating the fact as dispassionately as I could.

“That’s just my point,” Vaozey snapped. “You don’t understand what you’re talking about at all. I can’t get any stronger than this. I’ve tried, but I just can’t. This is as good as I’m going to get, and you’re saying it’s fifth best.” She slumped again, hanging her head and deflating. I wasn't sure how to respond, so I just watched as Vaozey pulled some grass out of the ground and held it flat on her right palm. Nothing happened, and a moment later she threw it away. “...course it doesn't work…” she muttered.

“You can use magic,” I said. “I’m almost certain of it.”

“Healing isn’t magic, no matter what you say,” Vaozey retorted, looking up at me. “Even if it is, what good is a person who can only heal? Everyone can heal. Animals can heal. If I couldn’t do that, I’d be on the level of an insect or a plant.” Actually, insects can heal magically too, I thought, they just don’t have pain-triggered rapid healing.

“I am fairly certain I know what is stopping you from being able to use magic,” I said. “If I’m right, the issue isn’t anything insurmountable. You just need to approach it in a different way, because your brain has a different synapse structure than the average human.” Vaozey’s eyes bored into mine, and I knew she was trying to spot where I was lying.

“And I suppose you know this ‘different way’ to do magic?” she asked, trying to mask the hope in her voice with suspicion.

“No,” I replied, “but I think I can create one.” Vaozey’s shoulders rose, and she cocked her head slightly to one side.

“And how much is this going to cost me?” she asked. “What is this going to cost me?”

“I just want to know if I’m right,” I replied. “The information will be useful to me, whether my idea works or not. I don’t require any payment.” If I am right, this could open up a whole new way to use these abilities, I thought, it could be the missing piece between my techniques and the Rehvite ones. Vaozey looked confused and doubtful, but then she crossed her arms and frowned at me.

“And you want to try this now?” she asked.

“We could,” I replied. Again, Vaozey looked at me with suspicion, but this time it wasn’t a front to hide any deeper emotion. I was planning to do it in a day or two once I had time to construct a real technique, I thought, but if she wants to try it now, I might as well indulge her, on the condition that it might not work.

“Just so you know, I still have a knife on me,” Vaozey warned. “You try anything funny, I don’t care how strong you are, I’ll cut your naateyzh off before you can stop me. I've done it before, I know where to aim. We don’t know each other like that, so don’t get any ideas.”