I slip through an overhang and duck beneath a hidden hole leading to an abandoned brewery that has shadows of rotting barrels and old pipes lying around in a haphazard manner. It smells musty in here, as if no one had been here in a very long time.

I slip off the silken tunic of Sir Ri and the warm, deep red fabric of the Guardian appears for the first time in a long while. I hold it out before me, running my hand across the deep red fabric Grandma so lovingly stitched. It brings a gentle warmth and light to my soul to slip back into this role, and yet a part of me feels a hint of guilt weighing on my soul... scratch that, a boat ton of guilt.

I wish Ran and I could scour the streets together again without fear of what could find us. Wish we could freely explore as we used to. Freely chase after criminals and not have to deal with the threat of world-wide inslavery to an insane individual.

Ran stayed behind at my insistence. I know she’s the one they are after. Just as I know I’m being a blasted hypocrite. But if Ran wanted to come, nothing short of a dragon could stop her. But she stayed. She’s just a teeny bit smarter than I am... but if I were going to the woods, she would’ve come whether or not I liked it.

But she stayed in her new barn that's literally all hers. I ease open the part of me that is bound to her. She's a part of me, like the other side of a coin. Much as guilt tries to overwhelm me and make me avoid her, I can't do it. I need her.

Something in me wonders if she is gonna get lonely without Blue. Maybe I should get her a cat.

Don’t you dare, Rans growls in my head.

I huff a laugh. At least she’s not too mad at me for leaving her behind. But if she’s listening in on my thoughts, she must be bored. She likely needs a friend.

I still think a cat would work. A growl rumbles in my mind and annoyance threads through the bond like a sharp needle jabbing into my toe.

I jerk on the red cloak. A balm overcomes my tumultuous emotions like welcoming an old friend you haven’t seen in a while or a hug from a family member. That last one really sends a thrill through my soul. Mom’s hugs are even better and warmer than I remembered. It seems you never truly realize what you have until you lose it.

I trail through lower, skirting the seedier areas and nodding to a few pickpockets who I’ve come to realize by sight, red fabric around their biceps or wrists. They are young and many are part of the Thieve’s Guild by necessity only. I’ve also been through a few rounds with the Thieve’s Guild… that was a bit of a war before I met the Mistress. She wasn’t anything like what I thought, and in fact, we actually had much in common. She just turned to a guild when I turned to the hood. She loves her kids like a mother hen, and I learned not to mess with the Guild unless one of them crossed a boundary.

I wouldn’t call her a friend nor ally. She is something… else. She only comes to me if I need her and vise versa. Anything beyond that is drivel.

But I know where her Guild Home above ground is, and I pass the decrepit homeless woman just outside the back door a pretty copper and a message.

She takes both without even looking at me, and I meander off into the streets, the men and women back here avoiding me like a plague.

The library spire rises high into the sky, glowing an otherworldly silver in the light of the full moon. I smile, finding the closer I step, the more the memories return. Ran climbing up the side of the library to get me into there to research diseases for Jill. The first time Ran asked for a book was one more of a hoot… I couldn’t actually speak to her then, so she had to huff and snort and whine to get my attention. And I didn’t think she could read… what animal knows how to read?

How’d you know how to read? I ask, curious.

She makes me wait for a response. I am ten steps closer to the library when she finally deems to respond with a sigh. I learned with Jack and Jill.

I almost trip over a rock. You… you listened in on their lessons and learned how to read with my siblings.

I can sense her unsatisfied grunt and her annoyance. It helped you were already learning how. I could skim some of the knowledge from your mind. The problem was turning books with a claw and getting Jill to put me pages on the floor.

I snort out a laugh, startling an old man who huddles deeper into his little cubby beneath an overhang. Oops. I flick him a coin, hoping that helps and doesn’t feed any addictions.

Some are just down on their luck. Some are addicted to some substance and have lost everything seeking an escape from this broken life. And some are spies placed by guilds.

I doubt he’s a spy, but I take precautions and a few extra twists and turns before darting into shadows and watching for any tails. When the moon is significantly higher in the sky, I’m content and dart across the street to the library, knocking on the place where the sprites open the door.

A part of me aches as I remember the times... before. A hole opens in my soul, but I shove it deep within and paste a smile on my face that grows real when I spot the orb before me.

The white wall splits in half and a little orb darts out and spins around me with dizzying quickness before darting into my chest. I chuckle, squeezing him tight. "It’s good to see you too, little guy."

Thomas—the first ever fairy to accept me and even lighting my books before I knew fairies were still around—bobs in front of me, going between happy orange, yellow, a light green, and a few others I can’t exactly name because they change so quickly.

He leads me inside, bobbing happily, and takes me farther beneath the library through a mixture of hidden passageways and brightly lit rooms. At last, we come to the garden room with the twinkling starlike lights overhead in a silken ceiling that looks like a night sky and the pagoda in the center.

I hear the flapping of quick wings like that of a hummingbird and brace myself as a little body thwacks into my chest. I wrap my arms around the toddler-sized sprite who clings to my tunic as if I were the last peice of cake.

"Hi, sweet one. How’re you doing?"

"I’m great. Really. So awesome. We’ve been eating starberries and boiberries and learning how to make pie and everyone’s learning how to use their Sparks better and Rose is so happy but misses you and—"

Natasha’s mother flutters up to us, smiling indulgently at her daughter as Natasha flaps her wings and talks too quickly for my ears to register.

Something about the size of my palm and glowing purple darts out of the bushes.

Natasha groans. "Get back here, Kipper!" She darts off, using my chest as a springboard and chasing the glowing purple light around the bushes and through the archways.

I smile at the queen. "She seems to be settling well."

The queen also watches, an adoring and happy smile on her lips and crinkling her eyes as she flutters about my shoulder height and Natasha’s brother, Thomas, pops from his orb into a little sprite. He waves, then goes to help his sister round up the... pet.

"She’s doing very well. So well, in fact, I can’t seem to keep up with her."

I grin. "Isn’t that what the younger generation is for? To keep us young?"

She laughs, a tinkling sound like glass shards falling on metal. "Do you have young sprites of your own?"

I shake my head. "No, just two younger siblings." I give a wry smile. "And that is quite enough, thank you."

She glances at me. "You’ll be surprised what you’ll wish for when you find the right life partner."

I meet her knowing eyes for a second before looking at the ground. "I… how can I bring a babe into such a time as this?" I whisper.

I sit and lean back against the wall near the door, and it feels heavenly to relax for a moment in time. The queen settles on my knee, crossing her legs and fluttering her butterfly-like wings to keep her balance.

"Is there any right time to have a child? I’m unsure. It seems there is no right time in the way of the world. The only time that is right is when the time comes. Then you will realize how right it is."

"That makes no sense."

"Ahhh, but it surely will when you are ready for little ones of your own."

I shift uncomfortably. "How has everything been here?" I ask.

She smiles. "One hundred sprites freed from Forced Bonds. It was a miracle. Many needed time to adjust and a place to be, but they are settled. They are home. We are forever in your debt, Guardian."

I shake my head. "No. I never did it for that and never will. Knowing they are free is quite enough."

She pats my leg. Her smile is not quite so forced and her wings are not ramrod straight like before. Her eyes are soft, like twinkling stars.

She is so much more relaxed and almost free compared to the first time I saw her. And I am nearly jealous of how relaxed and the peace that surrounds her in a near golden glow.

I try. For my family, I've tried to put the past weeks behind me and act as if everything is fine... but it's not. I feel a hole dwelling inside me and if I think for too long on it—it might just consume me. It might take me to a place where there is no return. And when I close my eyes at night, all I see is the red blood dripping down Jack's back and the sightless eyes of so, so many.

"If you need anything, you know where to find us. Now then, how are you?"

I hesitate, blinking. Will they wish to help me if they know what is happening? They’ve done enough. I don’t wish to endanger them further. But I could ask—

"My family is settling in their new home. We’ve had some hard times and life as Guardian is never easy nor simple, but it is good to have my family back. But I have a question."

She turns her face toward me, her eyes darting between my own. "I have felt something on you. Let me see it."

She flutters around the orb, not touching it physically, but reaching out in ways my eyesight cannot see. Can my Gift help me here?

I shake off the thought. It’s not worth it.

Rabbit.

Don’t call me names. Not nice.

Thought you liked rabbits? Comes her smug voice.

I bite my tongue. It might not help my thoughts, but the pain keeps me from saying something I’ll regret.

"Have you any idea what this is?" the queen says, her voice breathless and her wings fluttering with an extra vigor I have not yet seen from her, even when we plunged beneath the surface into battle.

"Erm… no." I wouldn’t have brought it otherwise.

She darts her eyes up at me, and they are alight with excitement. "This is an old relic. An Opes. It is used to magnify certain powers, made by undetermined means that was outlawed before the split of the races. It’s rumored they were created from the soul of a living being and could be quite powerful if made from the right creature—" she cuts herself off, and I wonder if she’s thinking the same thing I am.

"Do they want her soul to make one of these… things?" I ask softly, disgust pooling in my stomach and dread rising in my throat.

She flutters her wings, coming back to rest against my knee. Her brows furrow, creating a dainty little fold between her brows. "It is surely possible. A creature of her might, especially after bonding to a Mindempath, could make a Soul Opes much more potent than even the one you hold."

I swallow hard, tempted to throw the thing I hold in my hands against a wall. It’s likely I hold something’s soul in my hands, and that curdles my stomach like bad keifier, making it cramp and twist in disgust.

The queen’s wings stop fluttering. "The how to make such powerful items is lost to time, but the library is filled with knowledge from before the times of the break of man. You may be able to find answers within her depths, should she allow it."

"You speak of her as if—" I cut myself off with a groan. "Don’t tell me the library is alive?"

The queen shrugs dainty shoulders. "Even I am unsure of such. She is… inexplicable."

Great. And I just thought the warm or cold walls and the moving shelves were the fairies. Nope. Of course it couldn’t be so easily explained. It has to be a semi-sentient library that even fairies don’t understand.

Welcome to my life.

"I’m glad I left Ran. I made her stay home for her safety tonight, but we are both chaffing at not being able to get out and patrol. I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be able to keep her cooped up." And how long I can go without sleep, but patrolling and doing things is so much easier than rolling around in bed with only the ghosts of my thoughts to keep me company.

The queen laughs. It’s such a boisterous, but still very melodious, sound that I raise a brow. She wipes a tear from her eye. "Surely you realize you cannot keep such a creature cooped up, as you say." She stares at me as if I am missing something.

My eyes widen. I stand. The queen squeaks and flutters to keep from splatting on the ground. "I’d be most grateful if you would deign not to dump me off in the future," she mutters.

I ignore the disgruntled sprite and look over at the door where my beautiful bond stands. I draw back my shoulders and put my hands on my hips. Her ears flatten on her head and her tail tucks as she avoids my gaze.

"What do you think you’re doing?" I hiss between clenched teeth.

She cocks her head, nudging my chest with her wet nose when I get close enough. When I don’t respond with scratches and merely tap my foot, she drops her head with a sigh. You really think I’d let you go alone?

My shoulders droop and I uncross my arms. No. I should’ve known better. I take her head in my hands and kiss her forehead. I’m scared, girl. It’s you they want.

Her tail wags, and she looks up at me with wide, innocent eyes. Do you really think they can get to me through you?

I huff, partly in amusement and partly in frustration. Fine. You’re stubborn as an ox, you know that?

She yips knocking me over and licking my face.

I shove her off and laugh, flicking slobber back on her.

"You know I think that’s gross, but I’ll always love you, beaut."

Always and forever, sis.

If I can ditch her, I'll go see if the Theive's Guild has any reply.

She growls and licks my ear, getting slobber all in it that takes a bath to fully get the substance out.

Heard that, she says, tail thumping at the way I scrunch my face and try to get the slobber from my ear.

I groan and thump my head on the ground.