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The days of journey so far have been rather uneventful. Well, to be honest, I feel like I slept most of the time and I think maybe a day or two have passed since then, I'm not sure at this point.

What is concerning is the fact that the curse has reactivated and I'm back to [Student], which drops my [Endurance] even more, which also lowers my pain tolerance, and I'm basically under constant pain killers to somehow get by for now.

We got closer to the girls, maybe because they were slowed down or because they didn't see the hurry, but I can feel how they have changed direction recently and while I may not know the distance of each wife, I always know the direction. The quicker it changes, the closer we are.

“Unless the road curves, they're leaving it,” I say while making a sound between a groan and a yawn.

“Maybe to prepare for us,” Ara-san says while being strangely amused.

“...what did you do?”

“I may have sent a letter.”

“To Kyou-san and Rine?”

“To Gottfried-kun.”

“...” Why? Why did you do it? And from your—whatever—I can tell, that it's most likely something absolutely moronic. “What did you write?”

“This and that. We worked together,” she chuckles, as she pats the geezer on his shoulder.

“It was fun, though I can't read.” Please don't tell me that he's an alfr in human disguise.

“Phew...” Let's not look at the disadvantages for now, but what good may come from it. Knowing that we are coming means they can prepare. This is not good, but if we find a flaw... How would they prepare? How much?

What do we have here... Ara-san, knowledgeable but alfr. Failed before, combat power decent, yet more of a ranged attacker overall. Good match for the wizard and the priest, bad match for Meldorn and Gottfried, as the former is too quick and the latter too ridiculous.

We have me. If I push myself to my current limit, the most I can hope for is to make a toddler cry, possibly breaking its spirit and winning the fight. However, if it reacts with an anger tantrum, it'd probably kill me instead. Good match for inanimate objects and corpses, bad match for everything that can actively resist.

Then finally the geezer. Who is old, but has at least been able to somehow survive the road so far, so he's already infinitely stronger than I. Other than that, no intel. “Hey Geezer. Do you have any helpful talents in a fight?”

“Don't worry about me, I’ll get you past-” He suddenly catches an arrow that was about to hit his shoulder. He moved like out of reflex. “-past him, I guess.”

From the side of the road, I see a single man standing. Meldorn. He lifts his bow to shoot another arrow at the distance, this time it's much quicker and aimed at the donkey, but Ara-san takes her staff and hits it away. “How do you plan to do it, Grekkun?” she asks.

Grekkun? I guess that's his name. I didn't use [Dormurnal] while sleeping when I still had access to [Ranger], mostly because I'm concerned how much it would cut into my current recovery rate. I barely exchanged two sentences with him since he joined us. I guess I'll just stick with Geezer, Grekkun seems like a mouthful to say for a Japanese person.

“Hm...” The old man tightens the reign and whips them to spur the donkey, which began to run at its full, yet rather pitiful, speed. Its goal was directly at Meldorn. “Just keep these arrows away from the animal.”

Carts aren't made for this ground! It shakes and I have to hold tight onto the rim to not fall off, which becomes more and more difficult, as each impact sets off a hundred pain explosions in my body. Black spots cover my sight like ink, as I just hope during every moment for it to end... and there are way too many moments of this.

As we approach, Meldorn takes a few more shots at the donkey and the geezer. Ara-san deflects the former, while the geezer just catches every arrow pointed at him, even if they curve or do whatever. He's not even that fast while doing so, it's like he knows where they will try to hurt him.

The moment of truth comes, Meldorn evades the donkey, but has four arrows on his bow, he shoots them all at once, but the geezer jumps from the cart in front of the hunter who just unleashed his [Quadruple Shot]. All four arrows hit the poncho-clad torso of the geezer from point-blank distance, yet all of them... bounce off! “Go ahead.”

Ara-san takes the reins and I look back at the geezer, who is gyrating his head, as if he's doing a warming up.

I ban the geezer and Meldorn entirely from my mind, as I see this as covered and don't have the time, energy, or thought to waste on them right now. This means that we're going to face Gottfried and I need every resource I can get for it.

It takes a while, Ara-san and I are on edge, but when they finally come into sight, it seems anti-climactic. No attack from afar, no arena, just an open patch of uneven land. In a sense, it's the worst, as there is little to nothing to fall back. This is a place as neutral as possible, a place where you need to have your own power. And the one who has it most of all is standing in front of the rest of the group.

He's still far away, but I can't help but see him as a giant. Gottfried from Feuerberg, the one who crushed any sense of power scaling I had thus far with ease. The one who could kill me even at this distance without breaking a sweat. The wall I need to somehow overcome.

“Let's keep the cart here.” We only borrowed it, so I’d like to keep it whole. I pull down my hood, as I want to hide my loser's face. Panic and despair are about to crush my heart, but after all that physical pain, the mental anguish really doesn't hold a candle. I will collapse and break down after this anyway, so let's keep pushing a bit.

I feel power in my legs, as I jump from the cart, most likely drawing from the reserves I've built up by sleeping over the last few days, in addition to whatever my hero body does.

Ara-san walks next to me, and I beat down the feelings of jealousy and envy that I hold against her, as each step of mine is accompanied by pain that makes me grit my gums. I feel wounds reopen, burning ruptures throughout my body.

Gottfried steps forward, he yells at his companions to stay where they are. “What is the strategy, Kenta-kun?” Ara-san asks in a nonchalant manner, as if this isn't anything more than some sort of friendly PvP-event in a game.

“Get me pass him,” I ask her in a ragged voice, as walking surely takes its toll.

“Sure.” How can she be so calm? I'm about to piss my pants, despite how much I've cleared my head. “Just keep walking.” It's reassuring to have Ara-san act so reliably for a change.

We're now close, Gottfried still hasn't drawn his sword: “You are here to surrender?” The way he phrases this question shows that he doesn't believe it. However, I just keep on walking, trying to pass him, not even giving him so much as a word: “I'm talking to-” He's about to grab me, but draws his hand back, as Ara-san thrusts her staff at his hand.

She builds up in front of him, looking down on him despite being a head smaller than him: “Sir Gottfried-kun, I believe you read my letter?”

He turns to her, his hand on the grip of his sword: “I did.” However, I know he's still watching me, making sure to let me know that if I take another step, I'll immediately die.

“So you didn't understand it? Was my writing of too high a standard?” Is she starting to troll him?

“Better not mock me, elf.”

“Alfr.”

“Huh?”

“Do you want to know why Aroahenn hasn't allied itself with Feuerberg so far? Aside from past transgressions that your short-lived species most likely even forgot, you never even bothered to learn how we refer to ourselves. You lack any respect for our culture, desires, and morality. The only person in your whole kingdom in more than a whole century that even bothered to learn our proper name is Katarine von Stolzherz. And you? While you may be the strongest individual I’ve witnessed thus far, as a representative of your country, you're severely lacking, and by extension you're a terrible knight.”

Wow, what a burn! Gottfried seems to be taken aback for a second, I don't know whether he isn't used to being insulted that directly or because it actually hit him. Yet he collects himself quickly afterwards, and then replies: “So, alfr-”

“Ara'ainn. It's rude to refer to someone by their species.” ARA-SAN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? Ah, pain! Getting excited hurts!

“So, 'Ara'ainn'. Is that all you have to say?” He sure knows that he's at an absolute advantage.

“Now that we have the basis of courtesy reviewed, let's go back to the topic. My challenge still stands.” Is this about the letter?

“...I will accept it.” For whatever reason an ugly grin runs up his face, as he steps aside. “Go ahead, boy.”

I have not the slightest idea what is going on, but I start walking again, or more like stumbling forward. Each step I feel the bones in my feet move, I don't even know if I'm just that more conscious of it or if stuff is moving there in ways they shouldn't.

However, I do one step at a time, my eyes fixated on Rine. Unable to hold herself, she runs to me, while the wizard lifts his staff, probably trying to stop her, yet Kyou-san steps into his way, while the old priest looks like he wants to be anywhere but here.

Now the blonde, beautiful princess of a shitty country stands before me. This is the moment of truth.

―○●○―

While he wears the armor and the hood, I can barely recognize Kenta. Bandages are over his limbs, one eye is dyed deeply red, the nostrils ruptured, the little skin I can see is feverish and sweaty.

This is all my fault. Still, Kenta is here. Why? He claims to be a bad person, but he's still here for me. That's so unfair! Why are you doing this!? Why do you keep pushing!? How can you be so kind to someone like me?

Seeing you like this breaks my heart. How can you be a Fabian right now? In the stories, being hurt and wounded always doesn't seem so bad, but in reality, it's so much worse. He's now in front of me, and I take the rims of his hood and reveal his head. It looks rugged and most of it should be covered by bandages, yet for some reason, he decided to keep most of it revealed. I can clearly see his frayed and missing teeth, and there is only one question in my mind, while tears run down my cheeks: “Why... why are you trying to save me?”

—I have given you nothing but trouble and sorrow.

“I'm selfish, I don't take others into account.”

—It was my big adventurous journey with companions I could treat like I care about them.

“Whenever something doesn't go my way, I use physical or emotional force.”

—They were scared of me, and I used it to its fullest, even if I didn't realize it back then.

“I'm nothing. I'm stupid! I'm ignorant! I'm not even the strongest! I'm just good at bullying the much weaker, and whenever a challenge comes, I can't seal the deal!”

—I let the oni escape and get the better of me. I couldn't defeat Lvo. I couldn't defeat Instructor. The one defining trait, the one task in our party, I failed spectacularly times and again.

“I'm not even the crown princess anymore!”

—I've rejected my family and in return, my family has rejected me. I've never known how much it was just a part of me to be the heir to the throne, how much I took it for granted, until it was taken away for absolutely valid reasons.

With every word, I break down more and more, until I feel so miserable, that my heart aches. “I'm so sorry. This is all my fault.”

—Because of me, they fought. Because I decided to resist, Kyou and Ara got hurt, while Kenta is barely recognizable anymore.

“Stop! Stop, please!”

—So much happiness is flowing into me, and I feel so guilty about it. I just wish that he would be like that to someone more worthy than me, someone who actually deserves this.

“Stop trying to save meeeeee.... *sob, sob, sob*” My voice breaks and the shame and overwhelming surge of emotions makes me lower my face and hold myself, as tears are running non-stop to the ground.

Kenta listens to my words and then he does something unexpected: “Save you!?” He sounds like I said something ludicrous. “Are you out of your mind!?”

This baffles me so much that my tears suddenly stop flowing. “Huh?”

“Fuck! The moment I leave you alone for a day or three, you're right back at where you were! What am I to you, some sort of idiotic protagonist of a smut that's saving you and the day despite all odds!? Look at me, Rine! LOOK AT ME!”

I raise my head, and I see Kenta tensing up because of pain, blood running down the corner of his mouth, as his gums started to bleed. It is a nightmare.

“Yeah, take a good look. Do I look like someone who can save anyone? I can barely stand straight! Do you expect me to take my shitty spear, wave it around, beat the two over there with a single hit, then have something like an epic fight against the monstrosity behind me and then say crap like 'Rine's with us now. Don't bother her again!?' Rine, every breath hurts! It hurts so much! I'm about to pass out, and the only reason I'm here is to bring you down from your high horse! Shit, what do you think you are!? A damsel in distress?”

“Erm, but, I-” I have no idea how to answer it, so I want to point at the obvious: “But because of me-”

“BECAUSE OF YOU!? Oh, you're so important! By the way, that's sarcasm! When the fuck did I allow you to be responsible for my actions, my decisions? I may have asked you if you want to surrender or try to flee, but I made the choice to put my life on the line. It was me who misjudged the situation and didn't consider giving up earlier! This,” and he points at his body, “is the result of my own choices and don't you dare to take credit for it! I'm the one who decides what to do with my life, and I'm the one who's responsible for the consequences, and I won't let anyone take that from me! So don't say it's your fault. It's not! Get that stupid, self-serving thought out of your head immediately!”

...I'm so confused. He doesn't want to save me, but it also doesn't seem like he wants to blame me. “Why are you even here then!?”

“Didn't I just tell you? Because of my choices. Why are you here?”

“Erm... because of my choices as well?”

“Wrong.”

“But isn't it what you just said?”

“If you tell me here and now that you want to return home, then I'll accept that. Easy as that.”

“I've agreed.”

“Wrong.”

“Huh!? Didn't I just-”

“I didn't ask whether you agreed to it or not! I asked you if you 'want' to return home.”

It's just a single word. It could be so easy. I just need to say 'I want to return home' and then everything is done. Kenta would leave me alone, would stop hurting himself.

But I can't.

Tears roll down my cheeks once again, as I realize once more what a terrible liar I am. I can't tell a lie. At best I speak the untruth after convincing myself of a fact. Like how I fell for Kenta. If Kenta is my husband, that means I love him.

Yet at this moment, I can't convince myself. “I can't say it. But what I want can't be.”

“Rine, I can't save you. You're the only one who can save yourself.”

“I can't. I can't, I can't, I can't! I'm not strong enough!” Insecurity and fear are about to crush me, it feels like chains are wrapped around my whole body. I'm barely able to breathe.

“That's rich, coming from someone who never had to make an actual effort for their wants and needs before.” He nudges a bit closer, almost losing his balance. “Like I said, I can't save you. I can only offer some support.” He puts his hand on my cheek, slowly lifting my face to look into his eyes. “Sorry, but I'm going to become the biggest kind of jerk.”

…

His lips are gentle. In that one moment, my anxiety, my fears, my self-loath, all of these painful emotions are washed away by warmth I never knew I wanted so badly.

Kenta is kissing me...

Kenta and I are kissing.

Kenta...

I feel like I'm falling into a blackness deep inside myself. It's a warm place. It feels like I'm seeing flames, no, people shaped out of flames, almost like the bird Wizard Rotfeld made before, but instead of shaped fire, it's fire that comes in shape.

It's like I'm flying through the blackness, passing the first person, who I feel like it's very important, several others that stand in groups, again and again. I feel like I've seen many of them before, and the last few ones seem strangely familiar.

At the end of the last so familiar group, are eight sparks floating around, and the biggest of them start to grow. It grows more and more, it grows a head, a body, and limbs, and I know that this is me.

I fly through the flaming picture of myself, and I feel a new heat inside me. A heat that effortlessly burns the chains around my heart. A heat that runs through my blood and out of my skin. I hear Kenta coughing, one step away from me now.

I touch my lips. While the heat is intense, it doesn't dispel the warmth I still feel from the kiss.

I will do it! Because Kenta gave me strength.

“Don't worry” I say, as I step towards Instructor. “I got it.”

Then every doubt, every feeling, every moment starts to fade. Only one thought exists in my head anymore. Kenta. Kenta. KentaKentaKentaKentaKentaKenta.