I was in the middle of saying something to someone. When it started, everything I was and could think of stopped because of the pain. I was being pulled from my head. It wasn’t like my hair or beard was being pulled, more like I was being pulled out of my own head. It was searing pain, then a snap, and I was being peeled like a sticker.

The pulling feeling moved from inside my head down my neck. It rolled through me, tugging. Finally, my feet and hands were all that were left in place. With a final pull, I felt a great separation from my body, and I was free. The pain was gone, but so was I.

I floated for a while. I don’t know how long I drifted. I knew I had been somewhere and talking to someone. It wasn’t pleasant, and I knew they were wrong, but I also didn’t know where it was or what they were wrong about. My feelings were mine, but the memories were cloudy. I couldn’t wrap my mind around them.

Then there was light, almost like stepping from a dark room into a snowy morning. I didn’t know if I had opened my eyes or just realized that I was seeing something. I was mostly sure that my eyes were already open, but I couldn’t even remember the last time I saw something.

I held my hands up to try to block the light, only to see that while I had hands, the light went through it and was still coming from all around. I looked down at my body and saw an outline of a faded, translucent body. I was wearing a pair of khaki pants and a button-down red shirt. I ran my hands down my face and felt a beard, then I ran my hands down my neck. The skin felt odd, both slick like ice but warm like a window. I chuckled when I saw that I had the general shape of the average call center worker, more round than when they started.

I started to walk forward, but it felt odd. There was no resistance as I moved, no sound as my heavy feet fell to the ground. I knew I was moving, but I couldn’t tell how. I couldn’t see anything because of the light that was so bright it shined through me.

Then before me, quickly arose a great double mahogany door like I’d expect to see at a huge mansion. This door, however, had no mansion or even a frame. It was just a door, a pair of huge ten-foot-tall doors with nothing holding them up.

There was a latch on the door that was all bronze with a well-worn handle in the shape of a wingless dragon. When I reached for the door latch, I noticed that the door was hand-carved with a single giant tree. The tree looked real, except it was a carving and only the deep dark shade of mahogany. The carving itself made me pause and ponder its intricacies.

A voice filled with disinterest and boredom cut through my inspection of the door. “Are you coming in or staying out there for another day?”

I realized that my hand was on the door’s latch, but I had not opened it with how engrossed I was with the door and its ever-changing yet unchanging self. I pulled open the door, almost being caught back up in the carving, and just managed to get a reply out.

“Err, thank you! I’m coming in,” I said as I slipped in through the door.

As I passed through the double doors, I felt resistance to my steps again. I could hear my footfalls as I moved into the room beyond the light. I knew that I should have had problems seeing when I came into the room, but I didn’t. The thought tugged a little that something was wrong, but I cared more for what I was seeing.

Before me was an amazing study that, even before I took in its beauty, caused me to desire it for myself. It just felt like everything about it was designed just as I would if given a chance. I stood dazed with my hand still on the latch as I tried to take it all in. It was both large and cramped at the same time. The mahogany of the door continued into the room. The desk, which was in the center of the room, and the floor-to-ceiling shelves were all the same rich deep red-brown mahogany. The floor was covered with an ornate rug and pelts from large animals I had never seen. On the back wall was a fireplace that was edged with a polished white stone that looked like marble.

Sitting behind a huge desk, filled with stacks of papers and books, was the most outlandish man I had ever seen. He appeared to be in his mid to late sixties with white hair, a wrinkled face, and a hawk beak nose. Each eye was a different color, his right was blue like the sky, and his left was brownish-orange and glowing. He had a well-groomed, large handlebar mustache that went out to a fine point around four inches to the right side of his mouth, and the left curled up, almost touching his nose. While nothing about his face except his mustache was something he could’ve changed, it was his clothing that was most odd.

He wore what I’d expect to have seen at a renfaire. He had a black and gold brocade shirt with a red velvet drape over his shoulders. Around his neck were half a dozen necklaces with large amulets and devices and a black bow tie. On his fingers were rings of every shape and size, all gaudier than the next, some of which glowed faintly. To top this off, he had a big floppy blue hat on with an oversized feather sticking out of one side.

His bored voice broke the silence and yanked me back from staring at him.

He asked, “Are you going to close the door like polite company or stand there letting the flies in?”

I stammered out my reply while I closed the door, “Sorry, your study just caught me by surprise.”

“I don’t know why it should. Have you never seen a study before?” he asked with disdain.

“I have…,” I started to say that I had, but I couldn’t remember truly seeing one before I knew what everything was, but a memory of seeing something seemed not to be in my head. I had knowledge of what one was, but how my knowledge was there wasn’t there. “I don’t know. I can’t seem to remember seeing one; I can’t remember anything.”

“Good, good, then all is as it should be. Have a seat and we will get started and then we will be done.” He rattled out with almost manic speed while pointing to a high-backed green leather chair that I somehow had missed.

When I sat down, he started speaking through his nose again, “Name?”

I opened my mouth to give my name. But my mouth started to just move like a fish. I tried my hardest, but I couldn’t remember my name. I knew I had one. I just couldn’t find it.

I replied almost as a question, “I don’t know.”

“What name do you want, we already established that you don’t remember anything but I need a name to fill this form out and get you processed,” he bit back at me.

I looked around the room and then, with great confusion, replied, “I don’t know my name so I don’t know what name to give. Do you have any suggestions?”

He laid his quill down across the stack of papers and looked up at me with a slightly depressed smile. Then he sighed, shook his head, and started to speak again.

“You can give yourself any name that you want now. I could put in Firedancer, Cwqzkcks, or my favorite someone from your realm gave me one asdfjkl; whatever name you want we can put in,” the oddly angry man replied.

“I honestly don’t have any idea what to give as a name.”

“Fine, I can just put in a placeholder. We will come back to it. What race?”

“White, I mean Caucasian,” I replied with more certainty this time.

“Not what color of your skin you dimwit, what race, what species, what are you?” he roared nasally. “Souls from your realm are getting dumber and dumber, yet somehow you still got here.”

“Human, just look at me, what else could I be?”

“Drakon, elf of any type, dwarf, gnome, giant, lekaht, monitard, fairy, human, wild human. You name it and we have to make it happen!”

“So I’m not a human?”

“Strictly speaking right now you’re an idiot, but I still have to give you options, so please try to keep up.”

Why I took no offense to being called an idiot, I wasn’t sure. I knew that it was something that I should be mad about, yet it seemed if he said it, then it must somehow be true.

“So, I can be anything I want?”

“Yes, any race you want!” he huffed.

“Can I be a god?”

“No, gods are not a race.”

“So, no god?”

“No.”

“I guess if I’m picking something else, then I’ll be a Drakon. That is like a dragon, right?”

“Yes, well a dragon that is a man so yes like a dragon but on two feet.”

“That is what I’ll be then,” I said with more confidence than I knew I had.

“Class?” He asked

“Sure, sign me up for one, I like to learn,” I replied back to him.

“No, when I am asking what class, I mean what class of person, do you want to be?”

“I was lower middle class.”

“No, do you want to be a warrior, a monk, a priest, a mage, or a traveling circus performer?”

“Oh you mean job?”

“No, but you can think of it that way. If thinking is something that you do.”

“I don’t know. What is the best job I can get?”

“Class, best class is subjective, many think the warrior is because of powerful strikes, others think monk is because you live longer.”

“I don’t want to be a monk, I like my hair.”

“What? NEVER-MIND!”

“Can you pick just like you did for my name put in a placeholder?”

“Yes, but we can’t keep doing that; you have to make up your mind on something.”

“I did. I am a dragon.”

“No, you are an idiot who will be a Drakon.”

“Drakons are dragon people. That’s what you said.”

“Dumber and dumber,” he muttered. “Okay, so I have lots of questions here about your appearance. I also have information about where you’ll be starting. We need to go over these and then give you your starting gear. Then you’ll be on your way. It should only be another few hours to get all of this taken care of and then you’ll be out of my hair.”

“So since I am a Drakon can I breathe fire?”

“No.”

“Is there a dragon person race that can breathe fire?”

“Yes. How tall do you want to be?”

“Can I be one of them?”

“No. Now tell me how tall you are?”

“Why not?”

“They can’t sing, so you can’t have them as a race.”

“I don’t like to sing, so it doesn’t matter.”

“It matters,” he said, glaring with his glowing orange eye.

“Why does it matter if I don’t like singing?”

“I can’t tell you until you finish making yourself. I can only guide you to make certain choices.”

I was curious, and I knew that I should be getting angry with how this guy wasn’t telling me anything. I was shocked at how well I was taking things. I knew that wasn’t my normal self, but I also didn’t seem to care.

“Why can’t you tell me?” I asked.

He sighed and took a deep breath. “The rules keep me from telling you until after you create your new self. Now, how tall?”

“I don’t remember, but I guess tallish?”

The man shook his head and started to write. Then he asked.

“How much do you weigh?”

“I know I wasn’t in great shape but if I am going to be some lizard thing then I don’t want to be fat but I want to be big. I just don’t know how big that would be.”

“30 stones, are you fast?”

“How much is a stone?” I asked, confused.

The man scrunched up his nose and arched both his eyebrows. Then he slowly stroked his right handlebar, pulling it tight and twisting it straight. He opened his desk drawer and pulled out a large amulet which he held up and tapped it to his head, and then reached across the desk and hit me on the head. I felt a buzz shoot through me, and then he tapped his head again.

“Repeat what you said.”

“How much is a stone?” I repeated.

He nodded, “I don’t know how much a stone is. The magic of language is tied to your soul, and so when I told you how much you would weigh it came out in a term from your world. I don’t know why it was 30 rocks but that was what the magic thought. I think things are corrected now. A fit tall drakon would weigh about 400 pounds. Now would you rather be fast or strong?”

“Strong”

“Smart or strong?”

“Can I be both?”

“No,” he said flatly

“Smart.”

“Eye color?”

“Purple.”

“No.”

“Glowing Green?”

“No.”

“Red?”

“Scale color?”

“Glowing like I do now?”

“NO.”

“Black?”

“Fine. What is your favorite thing to do?”

I almost said “read,” but then I started to think, and the more I thought, the less I knew. I wasn’t sure about anything now. Did I like to read or hike? Was music my thing or people? I couldn’t remember anything, so how could I say what my favorite thing was?

“I don’t remember…”

“We keep going over this you shouldn’t remember but just say what you feel like saying.”

“Reading.”

The man rolled his eyes and started to fill out places on the stack of scrolls he had laid out. For each one of my answers, he put it in ten different places. Then he went back and moved lines by touching them and dragging them down to where he wanted them. He spent at least ten minutes per scroll filling in my answers.

I stood up and walked around his study. It was huge, and my butt hurt from sitting so much. His shelves were amazing. They were at least fourteen feet tall and packed beyond what they were designed for.

On top of each row of books were more books turned sideways, and there were scrolls stuffed wherever they could fit. In front of the books on the shelves were all kinds of baubles; I could see a human skull, a deer skull, and a few others which seemed to come from no earth animal, and other bones but also rocks and snow globes.

The books themselves were also among curiosities, some were leather-bound with printing that could be in any study, and others were bound with Coptic wiring. The colors of the books were every color I thought I’d ever seen. The titles were of an odd sort, or those which I could read since many of them were written in languages which I couldn’t read and in many cases had never seen, but those that I could read were so odd that it didn’t matter that I could read, like “Ultar and Altar and the Fordmin Expansion Via the Properties of Miz.”

He brought me back to his attention when he cleared his throat. “So we’ve finished everything here. You are a Drakon warrior from the Eldership of Mishop. When you arrive you’ll need to look for the temple district so that you’ll be introduced to the priests there and get bound to the god that paid for you to come here.”

“What’s his name?”

“Whose name?”

“The guy who bought me.”

“No one bought you.”

“You said a god paid for me to come here, so am I a slave?”

“No, he paid for you to cross the worlds, think of it as just paying your way.”

“Did I ask for this?”

“No, but you agreed when you came in here.”

“So, I got kidnapped?”

“No, you are not a goat.”

“You know what I mean when I say kidnapped. Taken by force and brought here unwillingly.”

“In that case, no. You walked through the door. There was no force or unwillingness there.”

“Can I leave the way I came?” I asked as I raised my right eyebrow.

“No.”

“So, I had no choice.”

“You did and you chose. Now be quiet,” the old man snapped. “Also, here is a book which, when you read it, will grant general knowledge of the area you’re from and how you got to where you are. Now with that in mind do you have your name picked out yet?”

“No, I still don’t know what name to pick, we can just use the placeholder that you have,” I replied with a bit of sadness.

The man smiled thinly and asked, “Are you sure that is what you want? This is the one time that you get to pick a name.”

“If I could remember my name, then I’d pick a name but since I can’t, I can’t tell you if there is a name that fits me so I’ll take whatever you give me,” I answered back.

“Please state that you agree with everything that we’ve put together for you and that you’re ready to move forward,” he said.

“I agree with what you have put together and I’m ready to move on.”

“Great!” he said.

Then with a slightly twisted smile, he opened a drawer on the right of the desk and dropped the scrolls in.

“Ready?” he asked.

“For what?”

“To move forward with your life.”

I nodded. He laughed and closed the drawer. Then a pink light flashed around me, and my knees buckled. I hadn’t truly felt anything until that point had been only half real. Then it was all amped up to 100, and I felt my skin breaking and my bones aching. My vision closed in around me as I heard a light laugh come from the man I had been talking to.

When my eyes opened, the first thing I saw was a pile of hair on the ground and what appeared to be flakes of skin like from a bad sunburn. Then I noticed that my hands were covered in green scales and ended with little black claws. I struggled to my feet and found that my point of view had moved up a couple of feet.

The man stood from behind his desk and said, “Bozo, time for you to grab your armor and pack and get out of my office! However, before you do, I need you to think ‘Full Status Sheet.’ Once you do, your full Status sheet will appear and we can move you forward.”

Current Experience: 0

Total Experience: 0

Level: 8

——

Name: Bozo

Race: Drakon

HP: 50

SP: 45

MP: 70

Defense:

(Equipment Bonuses)

——

Titles

Champion Unbound

——

Starting class: Champion*

Secondary class: Warrior

——

Strength 15*

Dexterity 12**

Intelligence 14

Will power 9

Vigor 15

Vitality 25

*Drakons strength for all damage is doubled

**Drakons dexterity for all combat skills is doubled

——

Primary class Champion

Rites of god* 0

Blessing of god* 0

Divine magic* 0

Leadership* 0

Quest Giving* 0

Secondary Class Warrior

Sword 10

Shield 7

Marching 4

Heavy Armor 5

Non-Class skills

Armor Maintenance 4

Survivalist 2

Tracking 3

Reading 6

*Champion skills unlocked once bound to god.

“Hey that reminds me, what is the name of the guy who paid to not have me kidnapped?” I asked.

“You mean the god that brought you here?”

“Yes.”

“Bartholomew.”

“The god’s name is Bartholomew?”

“Yes.”

“You have to be kidding me, that name could never strike fear or awe into someone.”

“He is not a god that counts on fear or awe of his name,” he snapped.

“Oh. So what does he do? Is he a god of love?” I asked with my still, very passive tone.

“No, the god of love is Amiasa and you don’t want to be near her.”

“So what does Bartholomew do?”

“He is the god of Bards and summer beer.”

“So, he is the god of music festivals?”

“No but close enough, you will learn more about him once you meet his priests and become bound to him.”

“So if I don’t want to work security for the music festivals can I go to a different god?”

“Yes, however, you would have to find a god that is looking for a champion and then convince them that you would be a good fit. Since you were picked by Batholomew, it would be hard to find someone else that will want you.”

“Oh.”

“Moving along, since you’re a Champion even though you’re unbound, you still have access to some Champion abilities that are not skills. One of the most profound abilities, and the only one that I’ll instruct you on here, is the Arm/Disarm ability. With this you’re able to magically store your weapons and armor in a space that doesn’t weigh anything nor takes up any space. You may only store one set to start with. Just think ‘Arm’ and your Arms will be equipped,” the odd man said.

I did as I was told and donned a red brigandine, chainmail pants with a kite shield on my left arm and in my right gauntlet was an unsheathed arming sword of fair quality. On my left hip was a sheath for the sword which I used. On my right was a small bag. I turned my helmeted head towards the madman to thank him.

As I turned, I saw a mirror and stopped to gape at myself. Where once I had have seen a slightly out-of-shape human now look back at me, now I was a lizard man. My eyes had a red sclera with jagged yellow lines in them. My pupils were no longer round but had a lizardlike slit and tilted ever so towards the outside. But my eyes weren’t the most astonishing thing. My skin was green and scaled; my mouth was enlarged and more elongated, but my lips appeared to not be able to move as well as a human’s. From just above the ridge of my nose, two horns formed, laying flat across my forehead and ending just above my head. I honestly had become a dragon man.

“Grab that bag and get out of here through this door. The day has been long and you moved things on my shelves while I was doing the job I had to do. So off with you and may the door hit you hard on the way out,” he said gruffly.

I reached down, grabbed the bag that was at my feet, and stepped towards a door that I’d not seen when I first came in. I paused before stepping through. This was it, the start of my new life since I couldn’t remember anything from before. This seemed right, like I wanted to go, and it would be okay. So I sealed my emotions, took a breath, and opened the door. I could clearly see a busy medieval city through the door. The sight of the crowds almost overwhelmed me.

I turned my head back to the man intending to say farewell to him. However, he beat me to it by shoving me through the door. I felt my foot hit the cobblestone road.

GATE OF SEASONS

ERROR CODE 42

PATCH INSTALL INITIATED 5%

RESTORE MEMORY CACHE

RACE CORRECTED

RELOCATED

CLASS CORRECTED

NAME CORRECTED

PREVIOUS VALUE BOZO > NEW VALUE ARN

STARTING EQUIPMENT ADJUSTED FOR RACE, CLASS, AND LOCATION

(REDACTED PER RULES) PROCESS STARTED ((REDACTED BY ORDER OF (REDACTED BY RULES))

The world turned pink once again, and then my head started to pound. My knees buckled out from under me, and I went to the ground hard. My whole body felt like it was on fire once again, and I had the worst migraine ever. The stone under me felt like it became soft as I curled up into a fetal position and passed out.