Chapter Thirteen

A Study in Meditation

Meditation had come as naturally as breathing to Inerys, however, the same could not be said about guiding her own essence. In truth, she was little more than a blind child when it came to anything regarding magic, let alone her own body and it had taken Ayduin and Ruslan days to properly prepare her for the most basic of cultivations.

She sat quietly within the innermost ring of the stone tree, the heart of the aviary, with her back straight and her wrists resting comfortably upon her knees. The beginner pose had come easily to her, even if she occasionally forgot to tuck her chin to keep her spine in proper alignment or found sitting cross-legged to be taxing after extended periods. In many ways, the meditative sessions she’d practiced these last few days reminded her of her outings into the Wilds. In both, she had to remain mindful.

The initial lessons were fairly simple, for all she had to do was clear her mind. However, the concept was far easier to master in theory than it was in practice. During the first two days, the smallest of scents or sounds proved the largest and most difficult of distractions. Though under Ayduin’s guidance, slowly, she managed to filter them away until she was able to maintain a proper meditative state for close to an hour. From there, she explored her own Soul bit by bit.

Prior to her meditation, Inerys had been aware of her cores, but hadn’t the slightest idea as to their makeup or their locations. To her, they were simply . . . there. Now, she could distinguish each one, as well as their respective meridians.

As she settled into the evening’s meditation, she focused upon her mental core first. Her gaze drew inward, to the space between her brows where a spherical, golden haze gradually revealed itself. It was more a cloudy collection of essence than anything of true structure, but the concept of its shape was beginning to take form. Of all her cores, this one had been the least affected by the Inheritance. Like her physical core, it had advanced to its Second Ascension, but the relative damage was mild by comparison.

She drew a deep breath and surveyed the meridians comprising the core itself. There were two types, she’d discovered, that made up the internal structure: a fixed set that provided the core’s main body and another she could direct to either reinforce one core or connect one to another. Ayduin referred to them as her static and dynamic channels and had loosely described the capabilities of each after Inerys had sensed them for herself. The woman preferred to guide Inerys far enough to allow her to make discoveries for herself and explain them further as she did.

Satisfied in her inspection, she sought her spiritual core. It burned like a sun within her chest and unlike her mental core, possessed a clear, distinguishable structure. The solid sphere warred like a tempest within her. Varying shades of red and black and gold swirled within the dense space, yet there was an obscurity to it. The Shackles the Sage had put into place undulated like thin, amber membranes around the core, restricting the essence within as well as Inerys’ access to it.

For the most part, she’d left the core alone as a result. She saw no point in prodding at it if there was nothing she could do to exercise it in some way. In all honesty, the core frightened her and she was content to leave it be until she was well and truly ready to handle it. There were far too many active meridians within to control, to say nothing of the magic reserves she sensed within. The untapped wellsprings roiled and seethed, eager to escape.

She shuddered.

If she even attempted to wrestle such power in her current state, she’d be little better than a child with a torch in a tinder barn. As it was, the core was eating her alive from the inside. Better to let such a beast idle in its cage than loose it upon the world.

She poked at her Shackles for a time, casting her Awareness along the surface and seeking out any weaknesses. She found none, which didn’t exactly surprise her. Her senses were still new, still developing. She could only imagine what Ayduin and Rulsan were capable of.

She allowed the thoughts to run their course, then released them, as Ayduin had taught her. Clearing her mind, she turned her mind’s eye to her pelvis, where her physical core took root. The collection of essence sputtered from time to time like a guttering candle on the verge of dousing. The long channels that stemmed from the core and looped throughout her body were thin and fractured almost in their entirety. If she traced them, there were only a handful of places where the channels were left whole and smooth.

Inspecting this core always made her sick.

Today, though, she hoped to begin its restoration.

Exhaling, she peeked open an eye and found Ayduin still seated across from her, mirroring her position. Per usual, she was dressed in her Talhavar garb. At this point, Inerys was convinced it was a second skin. She too opened an eye and an eyebrow raised in question.

“Ready to begin?”

Inerys nodded. “Please.”

“Very well,” she said, composing herself, “close your eyes and I will guide you.”

Inerys did as she asked and cleared her mind.

“Now that you’re more familiar with your cores and your channels, you should be able to tune into the circulation of each one. For now, we will work with your physical core. Focus on your channels and tap into the essence within them. You must familiarize yourself with the natural path of your essence before you can properly cycle it at will. If it helps, envision yourself floating along a river. Allow the current to guide you.”

Inerys drew a deep, purposeful breath, then slowly released it through her nose. Instead of a river, she imagined something more familiar. Calming, even: a stream. She focused on the steady rhythm of the water as it flowed over stone and sand alike, through narrow, curving paths and deep pools. Then, she attempted to layer her thoughts with her inner sense. Her Awareness, as Ruslan put it.

Instead of clear water, the currents of the stream became dark with the claret manifestation of her essence. Long threads of gold crested the water from time to time, highlighting the paths her meridians took through her core. Only, the paths were obscured and the stream came to an abrupt end. Suddenly, her essence met some invisible boundary and pooled, searching for a path forward. Her brow knitted and she tried again, only for the same nauseating result.

“I can’t move it. It’s . . . stuck, somehow,” she said.

“Because you’re tuned into your spiritual core,” Ayduin hummed. “When your cores are at varying Ascensions, you tend to gravitate toward the strongest.”

Inerys sighed, eager to try again.

As before, she envisioned the stream. It took a bit longer this time, but the current grew pearly white with the essence of her physical core. It was sluggish and stalled in places, but she could sense the paths throughout her body. Fractures, bruising and all. She let it guide her and made a mental map of the channels as they circulated through her. She only vaguely registered Ayduin’s incursion.

“Good,” the woman said. “Once you're comfortable, try to push your essence forward with your will. Encourage it to flow freely, rather than fall idle. The more you circulate it, the stronger the current becomes.”

Inerys knit her brow. Pushing it was easier said than done. She started in her core, coaxing her physical essence out and along its natural clockwise path through her body. Her weakened channels protested, sending sharp, throbbing pains throughout her body as they struggled to accommodate the swell of her essence. The harder she pushed, the more intense the pain. Fire sang through her veins, scorching her from the inside out with each completed cycle. Sweat beaded along her brow and slid down her temple, but she forged ahead.

In her state, she had no concept of time, nor the world around her. There was only the flow. It strengthened with each loop and eventually, her meridians adjusted to the new demand. Their expansion was slight, but enough. Gradually, the pain subsided until she was left with a dull ache in her bones and joints. Her seat wavered and she swayed for a moment.

“Red?”

She vaguely registered the voice, someone tapping at her cheeks.

“Red? Inerys? Inerys, wake up.”

Her eyes fluttered open, her lids heavy, gaze unfocused. “Hmm?”

Ayduin laid a hand on her shoulder and gave her a light shake. “Inerys?” She asked.

Inerys slowly blinked, her gaze settling on the Nar’Adai’s throat. For a moment, all she could hear was the woman’s heartbeat.

“I’m here,” she said faintly.

“For a moment there, I thought I’d lost you,” she said, still poking around Inerys’ Soul.

“Did I do it?”

The woman huffed a laugh. ”You almost killed yourself in the process, but you did. How do you feel?”

“Like I just walked through my own funeral pyre.”

She sensed Ayduin’s Awareness sweep through her channels.

“Well, you look worse for wear, but the flow of your essence is much stronger now. You’ll be sore for a few days, but such is life.”

Inerys nodded, raising a hand to her temple. Her skin was warm and tacky and she grimaced. She felt as though she’d gone through a week’s worth of a fever in the span of a few minutes. Or spent the better part of three days swimming in a wine cast.

“Best get you something to eat with a bit more essence,” Ayduin said. “That should help.”

Inerys blinked.

More food?

Since she’d been brought to the Talhavar headquarters, she’d all but grown fat on the essence-rich meals she’d been given. She wasn’t complaining, of course, she was merely . . . surprised. She wondered how much she could absorb with any given meal. Thus far, little had been added to her surplus, for her cores wicked away essence as soon as it entered her body. The difference it made in her Soul, though, was night and day.

It was far easier to think, to move, even to breathe, now that her cores were bolstered. Before, her Soul had been brittle, like long-dried clay. While it was still tender, she was fairly confident her channels wouldn’t burst if she so much as sneezed. Which had been a huge relief in itself.

However, as much as the meals helped, a part of her craved more.

“Is it possible to find some more blood as well?” She found herself asking, tearing her eyes away from the throbbing vein in the woman’s neck.

Much as she detested requesting such a thing, she could hardly deny her cravings. If they were as dangerous as Ruslan had warned, it would be in her best interest to stave them off while she was still in her right mind. Right now, she was all too tempted to help herself to Ayduin’s throat.

The woman’s lips thinned. “I’ll see what I can do. Was what you had this morning not enough?”

Guiltily, Inerys shook her head.

Ayduin sighed. “I’ll send for some more. Take a few minutes to rest, then repeat the cycle. If I do not return by the time you finish, do it again.”

She made to protest, only to be silenced by a finger.

“Practice makes perfect. You’ll need to actively direct your essence throughout the day in order to maintain the new current. Overtime, your channels will absorb the essence and the cracks will mend.”

“Am I to cycle for the rest of the night?”

“If you want to make decent progress, yes.”

Inerys muttered under her breath, but if this is what it took to heal her channels, so be it.

“Vaelor will monitor you while I’m away, in case anything happens.”

The hulking mass of scales, who encircled them, huffed an acknowledgement.

Ayduin patted him along the side of his neck and playfully pouted her lip. “Poor brute, I ask so much.”

He snorted, stirring a cloud of dust in his wake.

Ayduin shook her head as she rose and dusted off her hands. “Do play nice this time?”

Vaelor and Inerys eyed one another a moment, but after their last encounter, they’d reached an amiable respect.

The Nar’Adai studied the two a moment longer, as if she half expected a fight to break out, but relented and strode off. Inerys watched her go before turning her attention to the wyvern.

“I suppose it’s just you and I now,” she said.

Vaelor huffed and, rather dramatically, brought his tail around so that the long, membranous fins along the tip blocked his head.

She sighed.

“Right.”

He really was an ill tempered beast.

She was about to begin another cycle when she noticed a peculiarity in the wyvern’s tail. The very tip was perfectly divided in half by a strange groove that traveled a meter and a half down the center of the tail itself, between the two sail-like fins. She reached a hand out, then thought better of it. If these creatures were truly as intelligent as Ayduin claimed, perhaps it was in her best interest to treat them accordingly.

She cleared her throat. “May I touch your tail?”

To her surprise, the creature raised the end of his tail high enough to peer down at her. Though he could not speak, she could see the question lingering behind his giant blue eye. She gestured toward the groove.

“What is that? If you don’t mind my asking?”

Vaelor seemed to consider, then raised his head. His long neck arched like a swan as he fanned the two membranes flanking his tail. Then, he drew them flush against his scales, beneath what Inerys realized was a protective overhang of boney plates. The tip of his tail split, revealing a long, black barb that more closely resembled a polished spearhead. It flexed with the same dexterity of a cat’s claw and spanned nearly two meters beyond the end of his tail when fully extended.

Inerys’ eyes were wide. And here she thought her claws had been impressive. He had a damned sword in his tail. She couldn’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy. It was bad enough he had wings.