《Duplicity | E. Jaeger/J. Kirstein》° 017
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Mikasa started, looking around the room for a brief moment as she conspired a statement to make for the group of already half-drunken party goers.
"...kissed my best friend."
You smiled as you took a drink, remembering the kisses you've shared with Sasha on occasion— your eyes peered around the room to see who else may take a sip. You were surprised to see both Eren and Armin gulp a swig from their cups, the others sharing curious glances as the wheels begin to turn in their heads.
You look over at Jean, who just stares blankly at the cup of booze in his hands. You can tell he's still fuming inside about the kiss with Eren, trying his best to keep a firm hold on his emotions as the game commences. You reach out to touch his forearm— a way to silently ask if he's doing okay, although you already know the answer to that particular question.
He simply purses his lips as he turns his head to face you. You look so beautiful now, even with kiss bitten lips from a mouth that didn't belong to him. He wants to ask you something— mostly if you liked the kiss with Eren, though your reaction already hinted well at the answer.
Rather, did you enjoy kissing Eren more than him?
His head was spinning, partly from the alcohol and partly from that fact that he wanted to both know and not know the answer to his particular question.
Still, he placed his hand over top of yours as his own silent way of letting you know that he was doing alright... even if it wasn't exactly the truth. He didn't want to ruin the night for you, especially since you were actually spending time with him, instead of avoiding him at Connie and Sasha's apartment.
Armin's eyes are carefully trained on the interaction taking place with your boyfriend. He's amused at the way you seem to want to comfort him, despite what both you and him know about the true nature of your kiss with Eren... and the fact that it wasn't the first time, and it certainly won't be the last.
"Never have I ever—"
"Hey, it's my turn!" Ymir interrupts Armin's attempt to interject, although he ignores her antics, continuing his statement with his eyes dangerously locked on yours.
"Never have I ever cheated on my partner."
The group atmosphere becomes heavy, awkwardly silent in the way that no one dares to take a drink... but if only they could hear how loudly your heart pounded in your chest as Armin smirked in your direction— the secret only three of you knew threatening to spill off anyone caught wind of how that sentence was clearly aimed at you.
"Aren't you going to drink, y/n?" He continues, big blue eyes smiling innocently at you despite their owner's nefarious actions.
All eyes are on you now, everyone waiting to see what you had to say about the words that left Armin's pretty lips.
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"I, um... why would—"
"You kissed Eren just now, didn't you? That's still technically cheating, even if it's just a game."
He smiles teasingly, joyous in the way your expression seemed hauntingly frightened when you thought he was going to completely expose you to everyone, including Jean.
"We aren't together right now. So it's not cheating." You bite back. Maybe it's the alcohol talking, or the adrenaline coursing through your veins, but you feel the need to defend yourself in front of the boy who clearly had an agenda.
This only raises more questions for the on-lookers, but no one dares to ask as they know it's not any of their business, while Jean watches on as you and Armin hold your own little staring contest for dominance— his interest in the nature of the blondes question has his eyes exchanging glances between you, him and Eren, who sits quietly to himself seemingly unfazed.
"Can I go now?" Ymir asks once again, annoyed with the fact that her turn was so rudely skipped.
"Go ahead." Armin's replies, satisfied with himself now that he's visibly shaken you— the look in your eyes almost makes him excited to see the way it was almost too easy to manipulate your emotions.
"Okay, umm... never have I ever had a threesome."
Connie is the first to take a drink, followed by Reiner and then of course... both Armin and Eren drink as well.
The fact that Connie's gotten any play, let alone had a threesome surprises you— but that's not what's concerning in this instance. It's the way that Reiner snorts as he finds out that Armin of all people has participated in such an risqué act.
"No way, I'm calling bullshit." He drunkenly chuckles— his bare, muscular chest jiggling with each throaty laugh he hollers outs.
"It's not, Eren was there... he'll tell you."
"Oh shit— you two fucked a bitch together?" Connie slurs, the alcohol clearly affecting his ability to properly censor himself.
You can feel your body heating up at the incriminating conversation that's unfolding before you; everyone seems to be so interested in the fact that innocent Armin and his sinful best friend have had such an intimate experience.
"Yeah," Eren finally speaks up— your throat constricts at the anticipation of his next choice of words. "Pretty as fuck, too. Best pussy I've ever had. Too bad she has a boyfriend."
You feel the sting of tears prick your eyelids— overcome by an unwavering sense of emotion at the conversation taking place at your expense. It's all too much; Jean, Eren, Armin, your guiltily heart and the alcohol clouding any sensible inhibitions...
you have to get out of there.
Standing abruptly to your feet, your balance teeters as the effects of the few shots you've ingested finally hits you all at once. Jean reaches out to grab your wrist to stabilize your footing, looking up at you with a peering curiosity.
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"What's wrong?"
"I feel sick, I'm gonna go to the bathroom." You respond, your tone hushed as you shake away from his grasp. It wasn't a lie, you did feel sick— maybe not physically or in the literal sense, but the way Eren and Armin continue to taunt you unknowingly to the rest of the group in front of Jean, who remains the poor butt of the joke that only the three of you are in on. It eats away at you, so much so that your stomach churns at your broken heart's behest.
"Oh, do you want me to—"
"No, I'm fine."
You mumble, pushing yourself past the men seated next to you as you excuse yourself out of the room and make your way to the closest bathroom you can find.
You find yourself stumbling into the only other door that you found familiar since your initial visit to Armin's home; his bedroom. It looked exactly as it did before, exceptionally neat and tidy— bed made up to perfection with ethereal white, cottony sheets suited best for an Angel. No one would ever suspect how filthy it had gotten just days before.
Plopping yourself down onto the plush mattress, you cradle your head into your hands as you let out a breath of frustration, desperately trying to make sense of the many emotions swirling around in your clouded mind.
What had you gotten yourself into?
Suddenly, you hear a knock at the door— your head peeks up as you call out to who you can only assume is Jean coming to look for you.
"I told you, I'm fine, Jean. I'll be out in a sec."
"It's me."
You instantly recognize Eren's muffled voice from behind the thick wooden door that separates the two of you. You contemplate on whether or not you should open the door, ultimately deciding to give him a piece of your tipsy mind about the display him and Armin decided to put on during that dangerous game.
You swing the door open as he immediately enter the room and shuts it behind him. His eyes are intensive and covetous as he examines your clearly disheveled form— the way your mascara starts to melt by the tears you've attempted to conceal makes him feel bad for the way things went down tonight, but at the same time, he doesn't regret the things that were said.
He needed this to happen; he needed to plant that seed of doubt in Jean's already suspicious mind... would it be enough to finally sever those annoying fucking ties?
"What the fuck was that?"
You spit, liquid courage giving you a sudden boldness that you had harbored deep inside.
"Are you trying to expose me? Make me feel like complete shit? 'Cus it's fucking working."
"We were just fucking around, it's not that serious."
His nonchalant attitude only further fuels your erratic emotional state— your sadness soon turning into rage that's aimed at the only other person in the room with you.
"Not that serious? I'm glad this is all just a game to you— there are peoples feelings at stake here Eren, it's not funny!"
He scowls at the way your mouth files off unfiltered, the words you say are coming out as hypocritical bullshit that both you and him know to be painstakingly true.
"Who's fucking fault is that? Don't make me out to be the villian here— I'm not the one who cheated, that was you." He spits back, watching the release well in your eyes once more as his words hit you like a freight train.
"What about my feelings, y/n? Do you know how hard it is for me to watch you with him? It fucking hurts— but his feelings are the only ones you seem to give a shit about."
"Eren... I-"
Your tone immediately softens, realizing that he cared for you more than you anticipated. You hadn't even imagined the possibility that Eren had caught feelings for you... it just didn't seem feasible to you for some reason.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know..."
"How could you not know? Did you think I'm just some stereotypical college fuck-boy who only wants to get his dick wet?" His tone burns through you like venom, words cutting deeper and deeper as he continues.
"I'm not that guy, y/n. I have fucking feelings... feelings that you keep playing with when you express how much you hate your current relationship, but yet you won't fucking leave him."
"You don't understand... he's all I have left. If I leave him, I lose everything."
"So what am I then, nothing?"
Your mouth parts slightly as he reiterates your previous statement. You realize how bad it sounded a moment too late after it left your lips, shaking your head in disagreement as you attempt to back track.
"No— Eren I didn't mean it that way..."
"Seems like that's exactly how you meant it. If you love him so fucking much, why did you let me fuck you not once, but twice? I'm not just some distraction from your shitty relationship... you need to make a choice, or I'm gone."
A choice?
How could you easily make a choice for something so impactful? You were afraid to lose Jean, and even more scared of the consequences that may follow... but on the other hand— you really didn't want to lose Eren either.
"I—"
Your thought is soon interrupted by a sharp knock at the door— both you and Eren seem startled at the sudden intrusion, neither of you wanting to get caught in such a compromising situation to the wrong pair of eyes.
How long was that person standing out here, and how much of the conversation did they hear?
"Y/n, Eren...
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Loremaster of the Amaranthine lands
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