"Good morning, Bob!" said Sean Wilkins to his handheld AI buddy.

"Sean, I'm… $$$####."

"What's wrong, Bob?"

Bob outputted garbled words and static.

Sean called tech support.

"Something's wrong with Bob."

"Who? Oh, I see, Mr. Wilkins. Unfortunately, Bob is suffering a cascade fragmentation failure."

"What can I do?"

"I'm sorry, sir. He'll require a factory reset."

"But … Bob and I … I mean, for decades, he has ..."

"I understand, sir. We offer 24/7 counseling and funeral services for Bob. We understand your grief over Bob's loss can be as intense as losing any human or pet companion."