Chapter 50 - Ache

A deep rumble and the grinding of stone on stone shook the exposed weathered and smashed buildings atop the Sanctum of Escorath. Thin drifts of snow gathered in the remains of streets, the icy flakes still swirling down mysteriously from a clear and cloudless sky. The monstrous glass walls of the fortress towered around the perimeter, smooth and shining in the night, reflecting the glint of the stars and steaming as the falling snow landed on their gleaming surface. Inky black smoke gathered around the base of the smashed temple, reaching out for the woman that sat on the crumbling stairs with the diamond glimmer of tears in her steel eyes.

Winter looked at her hands, clenching her fists until she could feel the bite of her nails in her palms. Grimacing, she released her hands and glanced through her tears to the wonder that surrounded her. Walls standing almost a hundred feet tall and half as thick at the base stretched across her vision. Momentarily forgetting the pain in her heart she stood in wonder as a final rumble vibrated under her feet, the iris fully open and exposing the pit of Escorath to the stars. She reached out a hand, letting a snowflake settle before almost instantly melting from the warmth of her skin.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” came the instantly recognisable voice behind her, Silvast’s naturally sultry tones almost inside her very thoughts.

Winter nodded, keeping her face averted.

“A dwarf, dragon and two children of an almost extinct race manage the impossible.” Silvast chuckled, “Thain couldn’t let the opportunity slide.” she said as she stepped down from the ruined wall.

Silvast frowned, her bright silver eyes on Winter, “Winter?” she gently touched her arm, “What happened?”

Winter attempted to smile, “Is this how you felt when you realised Sian might set a barrier between you and Antrandis?” she frowned, “Or that she might take him away from you?”

Silvast tilted her head, her eyes narrowing, “Winter?”

Winter sighed and sat on the cracked step, “She was in my cell.”

“She was in your cell? Who was in your cell?”

Winter looked up and met Silvast’s eyes, watching as realisation came to the dragon. Silvast rested a hand on her shoulder before sitting beside her.

“So, another will be among us.” commented Silvast quietly, “Ekavira.” she said with a humoured chuckle, shifting until their shoulders touched, “The irony does not escape me.”

Winter glanced at her, noticing the humoured smile on Silvast’s lips.

“You of all should be the least concerned.”

Winter frowned, “Maybe, but it does not change…”

“What you are feeling?” Silvast finished, poking Winter gently in the side, “I have known him for so long, but you have been an actual part of him for longer. You should not be doubting.”

Silvast met her eyes, “I envy you. And do not even speak of Sian. I had to fumble my way through disagreements, misunderstandings and fear of never seeing him again for so many years. You are well aware I did terrible things out of jealousy and rage before I became accepting of who I am.”

“You know of the conflict he felt, both of our mistakes. In that cell, you watched it unfold through his eyes.” Silvast said quietly, “Compared to myself, how could you fear Ekavira? There is nothing she could take from you that I wouldn’t eradicate her kind for.”

“What you should be considering is what you will gain.” Silvast said.

Winter nodded slowly, feeling Silvast’s arm around her.

“One treasure does not displace another, Winter. Especially when that treasure is you. Our discussion this afternoon told me a lot; you are still growing, reborn as you are.” Silvast said, touching her forehead to Winter’s, “To fear the unknown and what is out of your control is natural.”

Silvast’s eyes glowed in the darkness, “Tell me; the fragments of Ekavira. Those that were imprisoned. Was she violent? Fearful? Respectful? Now freed and roaming…”

Winter stared at her, watching a smile grow on her face.

“She is peaceful and she sleeps in the shadows. So quiet that I...” Winter said, remembering Ekavira’s hopeful expression in the moment before the prison’s collapse, “Was unaware she was there.”

Silvast drew Winter into a hug, “Winter. You and Antrandis are Ekavira’s link to this realm. She is the Empress of her people, she has responsibilities, as I do.”

She watched as Winter stood, her eyes glowering.

“Winter, plans of the past no longer hold sway.”

“It does not change the pain inside. If I had been whole, then Alieka…”

Silvast nodded slowly, “It doesn’t, but I was there, as was Antrandis and many others. Do not blame yourself for a decision that was not yours to make. Don’t fall for that trap, Winter. Others lesser than you, have.”

“Ja’Sessh’s words have reminded you of what should have been,” Silvast said, pursing her lips, “In the old world.”

“But I was meant to…”

“Yes, meant to in the old world, not now.” smiled Silvast, “Everything changed the moment you bound yourself to him. Your maker and he made a pact that you are not a part of. I do feel that the reason Azzar Kah’Sharn trusts him so is because of you.”

Silvast looked out at the still cooling glass walls that now cut the desert sands off from the Sanctum.

“Do not carry self-blame and unwarranted guilt with you. If you are searching for reason, look to the one that turned you into a blunt tool. If you are looking for blame, the bastard who opened that rift resurrected not long before you became whole. Transform that guilt into anger for when we face off against him again. Because we will.”

“I just never felt this way, the desperation is…”

“Suddenly drowning you? Overwhelming? It is terrible, is it not? You are refusing to talk with Antrandis about this? Gods, Winter.”

“I have, and he…It is just so sudden.” Winter said, her voice choking as she realised.

“You might be ancient, but this version of yourself is still so very young, Winter.” Silvast said quietly, her eyes sweeping across to the valkyries in the distance, “Just as those girls are, these emotions give life immediacy and spice, experience them knowing that you are safe.”

“But she, Ekavira, she is…”

Silvast laughed, “Feisty? You did not even realise she was with you until moments ago, hidden respectfully quiet and in the shadows. Content to be close to her Master and the one who grants her life in this world.” she said as she tried unsuccessfully to blink away the amused expression, “You are so used to being the Handmaiden, cloistered in the temple of Lumos, watching the mortals pass you by that you have forgotten. No one can steal any of us away from you anymore.”

“I find it most endearing that you forget what you really are when you are vulnerable. I am honoured that you always find your way to me. A dragon and she-demon of the highest order speaking their mind and heart.” Silvast said with a sincere smile.

Winter turned and looked at her with damp eyes, “Am I a fool to feel this way?”

“No, not at all.” Silvast said, letting out a sigh and standing.

She walked over to Winter and touched between her collarbones with one fingertip, “It proves you are real and far more than just a weapon or artefact.”

Silvast’s eyebrows pinched together as the combined sigils of Darkfall and the Valkyrie started glowing under Winter’s skin.

“Do you really know what this is?”

Winter watched Silvast’s intent gaze, “A blood rune?”

Silvast shook her head, “No, far more than that. This is a piece of his soul. Something demon-kin do not possess. He freed you from what you were before. It does not matter that Ja’Sessh calls you ‘Gatekeeper’ or anything else for that matter. That is no longer your concern. I am surprised that you do not understand the significance.”

She watched Winter’s shocked expression, “That is much more than a symbol of your union to him. But as you are what you are, it is a small token and little more.”

Winter’s eyes immediately skimmed Silvast’s neck.

“I am a dragon, Winter.” she said dismissively with a gentle smile, “I look forward to your return, with Ekavira in tow. If what you suspect is true about the twins, we need her here.” she glanced over Winter’s shoulder, “I do think that Ja’Sessh has been terrorised enough. Jesse has taken a liking to him.”

Winter smiled, “Silvast, I...”

Silvast quickly brought a finger to her lips, “Leave your fears behind, my dark sister. Walk your next steps without concern. You have nothing to fear, you never have.”

Winter slowly nodded, her eyes flashing in the night before a frown came to her face, “Jesse?”

“She’s getting possessive. Earlier she was draped over him like a shawl.” Silvast said with a dark chuckle as Winter glanced across at the re-established camp.

Quickly turning, she gave Silvast a conflicted smile as inky shadows gathered rapidly and kissed her cheek, “Sil, thank you.” Winter said quietly as she burst into wisps of shade, her voice surrounding Silvast.

“Safe travels, Winter.” Silvast said in return to the empty ruins of the temple that surrounded her.

“Jesse, would you leave the cat be?” filtered Rhuthain’s voice through the ruined walls of the surface buildings, “I don’t know what you did to him, but quit stalking him.”

“Rhuthain, it is Winter’s order that I…”

“Aye, I know her order, you were to keep your eye on him. Not try to jump him.”

“But, there is something that I... Ja’Sessh? Stop hiding, come out.”

Rhuthain’s gravelly chuckles rolled over the ruins, “You came on a bit strong, something about that demoness body of yours. When he came out from down below with Sil this afternoon he was almost missing his stripes after that encounter with Winter.”

Ja’Sessh flattened himself against a wall, unmoving as he hid in the night.

“Ja’Sessh?” Jesse called out again.

“I mean, Jesse, why did you have to shift form? You could have stayed all feathery. I know only a handful of you can do that, but you know.” said Rhuthain, his voice closer and accompanied by the steady beat of boots on stone, “Could have kept yourself under control. It’s a bit of a shock to the senses.”

Ja’Sessh shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. The scent of dragon still strong in the air, the vision of Jesse’s tapered horns and the dark lustrous shine off her lips dragging at his mind and making his heart thunder in his ears. He leaned heavily against the wall and pressed a large hand against his chest, the sensation that his heart was trying to escape was overwhelming. He swallowed hard, his throat dry.

“Ja’Sessh?” came that soft voice nearby, making him jerk his head to the side to see her walk into the remains of the building.

Each step she made was like liquid, absorbing everything in its path, flowing mesmerizingly as she approached. Her wings were once again of feathers, horns no longer erupting from her head.

“I can feel you in here, there is no need to hide yourself.” she said quietly, moving closer.

He watched as she closed her eyes. Relying on her senses alone she stepped closer, toward him until she stood directly in front of him. She slowly reached up with a hand and touched his face, her fingers brushing through his whiskers before running through his fur and back until her fingers gently rubbed under his ear.

“I do not need to see you to know where you are, Ja’Sessh.” she whispered with her eyes still closed, “In moments you will leave and I will remain here.”

He let out a heavy breath from holding it for too long, the fear leaving him as she placed her hand over his, the sharp rise and fall of his chest as he laboured for air. With his last breath out he allowed his natural capacity for concealment to fall. Feeling a tug on his hand, he caught Jesse’s concerned smile before she led him along and out from the partially ruined building where he hid himself.

“I apologise for my,” she glanced back at him as she led him through the darkness, her hand still tightly gripping two of his fingers, “forwardness.”

She suddenly stopped and turned, immediately he could see the faint flicker of rich ruby embers as she looked up into his eyes, “I am not allowed to speak of my Master’s plans for Escorath. But I can tell you that I will remain here, a guardian of the Sanctum and protector of its secrets. I will await your return, Ja’Sessh.”

He stared at her dark silhouette, a sense of unease running through him at her forward posture and the sudden gentleness of her hand on his.

“My return? To this desert?” he asked tentatively, his ears still slicked back.

A smile came to her eyes and lips, “You can not see. You do not know.” she reached out with her free hand and touched his chest, “You will see and when you know, you will find me.”

She quickly glanced at the camp and Rhuthain standing, watching them silently in the distance.

She quickly found his eyes again, “Do not fear me, Ja’Sessh.” she said quietly before lifting his large hand to her face and brushing her cheek against it, “Soon you will know.”

Jesse gave him a coy smile and drew him along; he watched her movements as he walked with her, his hand still in her grasp.

“Sessh, you know running away from these girls never works. Once they got their prey’s scent...” Rhuthain said as they came into earshot.

The dwarf continued to stare at him before shifting his gaze to Jesse curiously and drawing a shrug from her.

“Aye, got you. But really? He’s like furry an all.” Rhuthain commented in surprise, “How come he’s so scared of the wings an stuff?”

Jesse shook her head, uncertainty on her face as dark inky tendrils gathered around them rapidly and drew together before Winter’s voice surrounded them.

“Because he doesn’t have a choice, his fear is justified. It is to be expected after what I took from her and in turn him and the others.”

Ja’Sessh stared at Winter as she walked from the darkness with purpose to stand before him, “What I was forced to take from Ja’Ekavira, your sister.” she said calmly, “Brought about by the demands of the Host. You only saw, but you did not understand the nature of what happened.”

Winter’s eyes skipped from Jesse’s ruby embers to Ja’Sessh’s blue, “I have the means to restore her once she is reunited with her Master. Our Master.”

Ja’Sessh looked at her in outrage, his voice loud, “Restore? Master? She has no Master. She could not…” he slowed as Winter shook her head, “She is the Empress. What is there to restore to a leader of her people?”

Winter looked at him without protest, her eyes assessing him carefully, “That may be so, I do not expect you to understand, Ja’Sessh. But you will.”

She quickly glanced at Jesse, frowning slightly, “Even I was unaware until bare moments ago.”

Ja’Sessh glared at her, “Unaware? What are you speaking of? Master? Which master?”

Winter met his angered gaze without reaction, “I am to meet with Ja’Ekavira, deliver Antrandis’s response and invitation. Before daybreak we will reach the Sanctum of Dagnetheln.”

She looked to the stars that glittered in the night sky before closing her eyes, “Eight spears have reached the borders of The DeKaalenstaad and have secured the path to the entrance.”

Ja’Sessh choked, “The path to the entrance is guarded, and they…” he said angrily under his breath.

“There was a minor skirmish and your people have been healed of their injuries in good faith and released.” she met his eyes, “Do you wish for me to tell you of your people’s unprovoked actions toward emissaries of the house of Darkfall?” she said with a threat in her tone.

He eyed her and did not respond while Jesse looked at Winter in concern.

“Talessia and the emissaries of Knocht have turned back to Dagnetheln.” she glanced back to Ja’Sessh, “You do understand that attacking emissaries on sight is a dangerous business. Making a merchant or two simply disappear because they stumbled past is one thing, but wantonly attacking recognised officials of a nation will immediately spark retaliation and a search.”

She stared at him, “Is it Ja’Ekavira’s order to do so, or your own? Maybe a general?”

Ja’Sessh winced, “It was my own.”

Winter nodded slowly, “As expected.” she glanced at Jesse, “You have a moment.” she said before turning away from the two and walking over to Rhuthain.

“So, what’s this business with the cats?” he asked quietly.

“It is so simple, yet complicated, Thain.” she said, “Keep watch over them for me.”

Rhuthain looked at her from the corner of his eye, “Aye.” he took a slow breath, “Things are going to be different?”

Winter chuckled, “Yes and no.”

He nodded slowly as she patted him on the shoulder, “I’ll say goodbye to the kids for you.”

She gave him a warm smile, “Please.” she said before walking toward Ja’Sessh.

Once again, inky darkness started to form and trail after her, increasing in volume and chasing her movements. Reaching Ja’Sessh she held out her hand, her eyes becoming like steel as she clenched her hand around his fingers until he growled in pain.

“Do not let go, Rakshasa.” she ordered as she continued to walk, with him falling in step at her side.

The impenetrable darkness rushed up behind them at Winter’s command, its tendrils sweeping up and over them, like the maw of some beast, swallowing them whole and leaving nothing behind as the dark smoke dispersed among the ruined buildings along with the echo of Ja’Sessh’s frenzied protest.