《Lipstick Stains》One More Year (Bonus Chapter)
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"Alam mo, kanina pa kita kinakausap pero ayaw mo akong pansinin. Ano bang problema mo?"
Between the two of us, Leni was the calmer one. Mas bihira siyang umiyak kaysa sa'kin, clingy siya pero hindi siya gaanong showy, bihirang magselos at magalit. Ni hindi nga ata nagtampo nang seryoso sa akin 'to kahit kailan. She was always the more understanding one.
Kaya kapag naiinis na siya't malamig na 'yung boses niya, nanlalamig rin ako. Kinakabahan na baka naabot niya na 'yung breaking point niya sa sobrang palagi niyang pagiging mapagpasensya at maintindihin. Tama sila Tricia, nakakatakot magalit ang mama nila.
My back was turned on her kaya hindi ko nakikita 'yung reaksyon niya. Hindi ko sinagot 'yung tanong niya.
Kagagaling lang namin sa isang dinner banquet and syempre lowkey lang kami pero magkatabi naman. We sat together with VP Kiko and the other senators na malapit sa amin like Chel, Leila, Teddy, Sonny, and the rest. Being in the same table, in the same space, was usually good enough for us dahil at the end of the day, sabay naman kaming uuwi't magkatabing matutulog.
Ewan ko kung anong sumapi sa'kin tonight but seeing Kiko with Sharon, Chel with his wife, the others with their lovers, dancing and having fun together, exchanging sweet whispers and holding hands...I felt my chest tighten. Gusto ko rin na gano'n kami.
Leni reached for my hand and squeezed it briefly as if to ask if I'm okay. Agad rin niyang binitawan as to not raise suspicion and I wanted to tell her na 'wag muna siyang bumitaw but I knew better. She was looking out for us, for me, for our safety. Kaya in return, ngumiti lang ako. But I know na ramdam niyang hindi ako okay. Alam niyang hindi ako gano'n ngumiti at hindi ko siya gano'n i-reassure.
We were on our way home and she was driving. Tinanong niya ako, "Pangga, anong problema?"
Hindi ko siya sinagot no'n at tumingin na lang sa labas ng bintana. Kapag ganyan, sa una't pangalawang beses na hindi mo siya sasagutin, mangungulit siya.
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"Risaaaa, mahal ko, talk to me please? Sige ka, magtatampo ako sa'yo."
Sinusundot-sundot niya na 'yung braso ko pero hindi pa rin ako umiimik. She pouted and put her hand on my thigh, gripping lightly.
"Huy, Pangga. Nabingi ka na ba? Kausapin mo naman ako oh. Ito na nga oh, kiss na kita."
Sakto tumigil kami sa stoplight and she leaned in to kiss me on the lips pero umiwas ako kaya sa pisngi niya lang ako nahalikan.
Napatigil siya tapos inalis na 'yung pagkakahawak sa hita ko. Tahimik na kami for the rest of the ride. Ayan na, nag-uumpisa na siya mainis.
We arrived sa condo niya and she parked the car. Dito kami magstay tonight kasi wala sila Aika. "We're here." She said. Hindi ko siya ulit pinansin at lumabas na ng kotse.
I heard her scoff in astonishment bago ko sinara 'yung car door sa side ko. Nakatayo lang ako doon, hinihintay siyang lumabas. She stepped out and looked at me directly in the eyes, "Risa..."
Hindi ko pa rin siya pinansin at naglakad na papasok sa loob ng building. The elevator ride paakyat was silent. Nakakabingi 'yung katahimikan, hindi ako sanay.
Before she opened the door sa unit niya, tinawag niya ulit 'yung pangalan ko. More serious and more demanding. "Ana Theresia."
Binuksan ko lang 'yung pinto at pumasok na.
Ang tagal na naming nakatayo nang ganito dito. Nakatalikod lang ako, hindi pa rin sinasagot 'yung tanong niya kung ano bang problema ko. I feel her eyes burning on the back of my head.
Ano nga ba kasing problema ko? Ayoko na ba na hanggang ganito lang kami? Pagod na ba akong maghintay? Nagsasawa na ba ako sa ganito?
Sa totoo lang, hindi ko na rin alam.
I expected Leni to hug me from behind, as she would always do kapag tinatalikuran ko siya sa kalagitnaan ng pag-aaway namin. Pero para akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig when I heard her walk away at umakyat sa kwarto namin.
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I slumped myself on the sofa and groaned into a pillow. Tangina, tangina, tangina. Paano ako maiintindihan ni Leni kung pati sarili ko hindi ko maintindihan?
Nagstay ako sa living room siguro mga 30 minutes. I thought about my actions and narealize ko na sobrang maling-mali ako. I shouldn't have ignored her, I shouldn't have pushed her away. Kasi sino bang iba na magcocomfort at magrereassure sa aming dalawa na kami pa rin kahit anong mangyari kundi kami lang diba?
I made my way upstairs and saw Leni laying in bed. Nakatalikod siya sa akin kaya hindi ko alam kung gising ba siya or what. I got in the bed and hugged her, concealing my face on her shoulder. I inhaled the scent of her hair. Namiss kong yakapin siya buong araw.
I didn't talk. Neither did she. We stayed like that for a while until I felt her sob quietly.
"Pangga, 'wag ka na umiyak. Sorry. I'm so sorry." Pinaharap ko siya sa'kin and I saw how puffy and red her eyes were from crying. Pinunasan ko 'yung luha niya and kissed her cheeks. "Sorry." I told her over and over again.
I scooped her into my arms and laid her head on my shoulder. Umiiyak pa rin siya at ang sakit sakit kasi ngayon lang humagulgol nang ganito si Leni sa harap ko. I rocked her back and forth, whispering my apology and i love you's repeatedly. I left kisses at the top of her head with hopes to calm her down.
Eventually, she did.
"Ga, I'm sorry, hindi ko sinasadya. Nainggit ako sa kanila kanina. Gusto ko gano'n din tayo eh. Sorry hindi kita pinapansin, sana kinausap kita para okay tayong dalawa ngayon."
"Pagod ka na ba na gan'to lang tayo?"
My tears fell as the words left her lips. Natatakot na ako. Dito na ba kami matatapos?
"Hindi. Syempre hindi. Leni ano bang klaseng tanong 'yan."
"You have to tell me kapag pagod ka na," She said in between hiccups. "Sabihin mo sa akin para papawiin ko 'yung pagod mo. Okay lang naman na mapagod ka, Risa. Naiintindihan ko kasi alam ko na aabot talaga sa gano'ng point. Pero sana sabihin mo sa akin para maiparamdam ko sa'yo na sulit 'yung pagod mo."
We were crying as we laid in each other's arms. Nakapikit lang 'yung mga mata niya habang nagsasalita siya pero okay lang kasi baka humagulgol rin ako sa harap niya kapag tinignan niya 'yung mata ko.
"Sabihin mo sa akin kung pagod ka na, kung sawa ka na, kung ayaw mo na. Hindi para hayaan at panoorin kitang umalis, pero para ma-ipaalala ko sa'yo kung bakit mo ako mahal. Para ma-ipaalala ko sa'yo kung bakit pinili mong manatili sa akin kahit na alam mong mahirap at matagal na panahon pa bago tayo maging malaya sa harap ng iba."
She lifted her head off my shoulder and held my face in her hands. "Kung sa tingin mong dito tayo matatapos, nagkakamali ka. I love you, Risa. And I'll never get tired of telling and reminding you how much I love you. We've gone through so much in our lives that we've both learned to say the things we want to say and do the things we want to do. Palagi kong sasabihin at ipapaalala sa'yo na mahal kita because that's how I choose to live."
She wiped the tears off my cheeks and kissed me tenderly. I kissed her back. Binuhos ko lahat ng pagod na nararamdaman ko sa halik na 'to and in return, Leni poured her love and strength.
"Isang taon na lang. Then we can do whatever we want. One more year, Ga." She pressed our foreheads together.
"One more year."
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She, the one (old)
There is a girl, who was born by other's deaths. A girl who just follows her fate. Not knowing what awaits her she tries to learn the meaning of her life. Not only she has to survive, she also has to fight herself, and her feelings. What will happen with our demon in this fantasy world? Hold on to your stomach, heart and mind, I'm gonna mess them all up. MORE TAGS: demoness,""reborn"", strong female mc, ""author's regret" MATURE WARNING: RAPE,GORE,VIOLENCE Temporary cover(drawn by me, original: Chaser.) Currently on HIATUS (writing other novel)
8 127Stonenanny
Infamous assassin of the past, now the next on death row. He had his chances, but loyalty towards the goal took the better of him. There was no going back now, he knew it. After death he would go back to the cycle of souls and start anew as it meant to be. Or so he thought. Assassin to hero babysitter because giving choice to others is overrated.
8 203The Sovereign (UNDERGOING REVAMP)
Rewrite: an ability to alter a physical phenomena as long as the person using it is in contact with the object…..She needs no saving.She needs no man.Betrayed, Lena Hugh died with nothing but revenge in mind. She was the ruler, the sovereign, yet she was killed by her own stupidity. How ironic.Waking up two thousand years after her death only meant one thing.She was given a second chance.But this world was no longer the world that she knew. The magic that she was used to was now forgotten, buried and replaced with technology designed to alter physical phenomena of an object while limiting individuals’ abilities.Now in a new body with a new name, ability and appearance, Lena will traverse the world of magic with nothing but her wits and innate talent.And nothing will stop Lena from reclaiming her title as The Sovereign. ..... Updates: Daily >>Newbie Writer
8 205The Darkness In Your Mind
The darkness in your mind is a novel about a killer named Harold who meets his inevitable demise and says that if he had a second chance at life he "might" not be such a bad guy he is then reincarnated into a fantasy world without the memories of his past life and gains dark powers that are extremely strong, yet despite gaining these obviously evil powers that could be used in so many wrong ways, he stays true to his word from his past life, in his own ways. Volume 3 will begin sometime in may since thats when summer vacation begins, so early may. (This is also on webnovel, I have edited my description there so it says it is on this site. Here is the Webnovel link)
8 62Beneath The Surface
Aika Robredo was a poster child: with a Masters from Harvard, a respectable career trajectory and dependable eldest daughter of the Robredo family. Everyone was telling Aika that all she had left to do was finding her 'dream guy' to settle down with until Nathaniel Lee came into the picture...with a young daughter and an ill-fated destiny with the Philippines in tow. The eldest daughter of the Philippines' most respected civil servant couple and a single father with a crippling emotional burden seemed like a total mismatch. In the face of adversities, was love really enough to overcome all?
8 72Spoken Word Poetries
sa lahat ng tula ,ikaw ang paboritong paksa.maubusan man ng mga salita ,aalayan ka pa rin ng mga talata.- A collection of the random poetries that i write. Consists of English and Tagalog poems.
8 94